Chapter 17

Present Day

 

My own breath and heart rate accelerate a whoosh of blood to my head, creating a crashing wave effect in my ears.

Holy shit, they’re fucking. Or at least, getting ready to fuck.

I can’t stop my feet from moving me forward any more than I could stop an avalanche down a mountainside. My feet propel me toward the cracked door and like the voyeur I am, I peer in.

Sage sits on the edge of the bed facing the door at an angle, London straddling him as he peppers her neck with kisses. Her hands strum through his thick mess of dark hair, yanking his head in the place she needs his lips.

“I’ve missed this so much, baby.”

She hums with satisfaction, arching her back as his lips move down to her collarbone. London has on a short nightie, flimsy enough to see through in the soft light of the room. The skirt is hiked up so I can see the gentle curves of her ass, one of Sage’s hands spread out and cupping her flesh.

He pushes the nightie material up as he explores the skin of her backside. It’s smooth and shimmery, the golden tan hidden only by the waves of her hair cascading down.

“Mmm…I just wish…”

Sage stops his assault on her neck, tilting his head up to stare at her. I notice the crinkles at the corners of his eyes no longer lined with make-up. At least not tonight.

“What do you wish for, baby?” he urges, as she slowly rocks into his groin.

It’s a word that spears me in the heart. Brings me to my knees. Gives me hope and longing so great that I believe in miracles, in fairies and ghosts of the past.

The one word she murmurs has my cock filling with blood, thickening with need.

“Cam.”

Perhaps I let out a noise, or maybe it is intuition, but suddenly Sage’s eyes peg me and bore into mine. He notices me standing there, my hand over my groin, half naked as I watch them without permission. His gaze heats and burns through me.

He smirks, speaking the words directly to me even when he says to London, “Should we ask him to join us, baby?”

I shake my head, but he crooks a finger behind London’s back to beckon me forward. She still has no idea that I stand there, on the precipice of making a monumental decision. My mouth is dry and I’m in need of…fuck.

I need them.

Never letting his eyes leave me, he drags his mouth across London’s lips, sucking at her, making me yearn for her delicious taste. It kills me to watch and not partake. But it’ll hurt me even more not to join in. To take what they’re offering.

He wraps a hand around her hair, pulling it back with a hard tug. “Answer me, baby. Tell me how much you want Cam here with us right now. How long you’ve waited for him to fuck us again. Isn’t that what you want? For Cam to fuck your tight pussy and come inside you?”

London grinds on top of Sage’s lap, wrapping her legs around his waist. The sound she makes – a soft, sensual mewl – has me taking my first step into the room.

Her head snaps in my direction when she hears my first steps.

Sage chuckles knowingly. “Your wish is my command.”

I’m not the same boy I used to be. I’m a man, with life experience, and I no longer hesitate when it comes to something I want. I am savage desire and wild longing and I know what I want now.

Them.

In three short strides, I’m next to the edge of the bed and I fall to my knees in supplication.

Because of my height, my lips are inches from her shoulder and I lift my hands to cup her face, pulling her down to meet me.

“London…I need you,” I plead, my voice raw with hunger. And then I look to Sage, who has dropped his hands behind him on the bed to lounge in a lazy as fuck position. “Can I have her?”

His lips curl in sinful delight, a smile worthy of the devil himself. It’s as if I’m making a deal for my soul.

But I already gave up my heart and soul ten years ago. No sense trying to win them back now.

Sage shrugs with one shoulder and cocks his head. “I don’t know. She’s not mine to give. You’ll have to ask her.”

I nod like a kid who’s been asked if he wants a present from Santa. My head snaps back toward London.

“May I?”

London’s smile vanishes as she looks between Sage and me, a myriad of questions and desire darkening her eyes.

She lays a hand against Sage’s rough jawline, and the other on my cheek. She slowly leans over to place a gentle kiss on my lips. It’s soft and perfect. A consent. An agreement. A desire.

Before she turns to do the same to Sage, she stares into my eyes, reading something there.

“On one condition.”

I will give her anything and everything. Whatever she wants. Just to be here with them tonight. She bites the corner of her lip. I’m fascinated with her tantalizing mouth as I stare between her mouth and down into the V of her nightie, noticing the peaks of her nipples that poke through, eliciting a thrill of excitement to my cock. My hand reaches out unbidden, my fingernails scoring over the tight bud.

“Anything. Name it.”

She doesn’t give me an immediate answer but palms her hand over mine to massage her breast, the silk of the material slipping down to expose the nipple. My mouth waters to taste it.

“Let him touch you, Cam. I want to watch.”

Sage and I both let out simultaneous curses.

“Oh fuck,” I say.

“Fuck me.” Sage sits up, no longer lazy and carefree, and grabs for London’s face, claiming her kiss with a fiery passion and heat. I hear him speak something against her mouth between kisses and he murmurs, “Thank you.”

I drop back to sit on my heels, a little shell shocked by her request.

The last time I let Sage touch me, it ended our friendship.

It ruined everything.

Maybe this is what redemption looks like. Forgiveness of my sins.

Giving in and giving up the ghost of past mistakes.

Coming to the realization that life is about letting go of guilt and anger and learning to love in any shape and form to find fulfillment.