NINE

 

 

Her attraction to Raid was still perplexing her on her walk to his place the next morning.

In the real world, Shea wouldn’t go to a guy’s house the morning after an encounter like she’d had with Raid against her bedroom wall. But, he was still her boss and she was still a professional… She was just starting to forget what she was a professional at.

Yeah, writing was her passion, and journalism had been a niche that paid the bills. Turned out that she was good at it. Shea loved to ask questions and to reveal truths. Sure, sitting and waiting to report sound bites was a bore, and a couple of editors had told her that she didn’t have the killer instinct, which was ironic given where she found herself.

There were no sound bites to report on the compound. That didn’t mean there wasn’t news to share. It just came in the form of these reports she had to deliver to their Laird.

This time when she got to Raid’s door, Shea steeled herself for a reason different to the previous morning’s. Holding her head up, she refused to be embarrassed, and strode in like she belonged. Raid wasn’t in the kitchen, and she wasn’t going to lurk by the front door, so she proceeded into the living room.

Passing the stairs, she caught sight of him seated on the balcony couch outside. The back of it ran parallel to the glass frontage, so he wouldn’t see her coming. The sliding door was open. Tiptoeing out, she didn’t want to startle him. But, other than glancing up when her movement drew his eye, he didn’t react to her at all. Elevating the reports to show why she was there, she only kept going after he’d gestured her over with two straight fingers.

Although Raid was holding a steaming coffee cup, there was a second on the table. As far as she knew, there was no one else there. But, Shea didn’t want to make any assumptions.

For a minute, she stood there, just holding the reports while he scanned his kingdom. “Would you like me to read to you?” she asked. “I have an update on our raccoon.”

Shaking his head, Raid pointed at the table, indicating where she should put the papers. “Just put them down,” he said, looking back toward the compound. “Anything of note? Anything non-critter related?”

Displaying no kind of good humor wasn’t a great start. Though it wasn’t like he was usually a sunshiny, happy guy. The way he’d been last night proved that there was little he wasn’t serious about. Even getting oral hadn’t made him crack a smile.

Some of the reports were sealed. Shea was only allowed to read reports from certain departments. No department was allowed to see other departments’ entries. The only people allowed to see everything were Raid and Diego. She assumed the Laird would know which she had and hadn’t seen given that he was the one to make the rules.

“Last night’s incident made it in there,” she said, causing his attention to drift to her. “The mess, not… after.” Shifting his gaze back toward the compound, he didn’t react. Her jaw clicked. “You don’t need a written reminder of that.”

A long silence stretched between them. Shea didn’t want to just walk out, but if he didn’t give her some clue about what he was thinking, she may have no other choice. She couldn’t stand here all day. Somehow, she knew if she tried to push him for a reaction to their intimate encounter, he’d push back.

It wasn’t as though she expected they were going to begin a tempestuous affair, but it would be nice to know if they were going to build a professional relationship… and if they were going to tell Diego what had happened.

Her Laird did eventually give her orders. “It can’t happen again,” he said, without a glimmer of uncertainty.

“I know,” she said, catching her finger at the small of her back in her opposite hand.

“What happened in the mess or after.”

“I know,” she said again.

The brush off was exactly what she’d expected. Shea hadn’t thought he’d have a personality transplant overnight just because she’d sucked his dick. It didn’t happen with guys in the real world, she had no reason to believe a man out here would be any different.

Being cold and detached was Raid’s default and he was good at it, so she wasn’t surprised by his attitude. That he was even admitting their encounter was more than she’d expected. Shea was gratified that he was acknowledging it, being ignored or punished for what had happened wouldn’t have made her feel good.

“You are not one of the guys. No matter how often you think it or how often they say it. Anything that involves unbuttoning or unzipping is forbidden,” he said and turned to set his authority on her. “That’s a direct order. I’ve said the words to you. There’s no equivocation.”

Direction was good; Shea felt better having a clear path. If she knew which rules not to break, she’d be less likely to find herself back in confinement. Pissing off the Laird led to punishment, and she didn’t want that. Diego had trusted her with important duties. The last thing she wanted to do was let her friend down.

“Okay,” she said and nodded. “I understand.”

“Good,” he said and pointed at the couch. “Now sit and drink your coffee.”

Forgiveness was unexpected. Orders had been as much as she’d hoped for, but receiving them hadn’t been guaranteed. Nothing was guaranteed with the Laird. She’d found out last night just how good he was at surprises. Though, she had a feeling he’d surprised even himself in her bedroom.

She’d been almost sure that Raid would set instructions for her to be punished or penalized. Pretending she hadn’t sucked him off at all had been a possibility she’d considered facing this morning, and had decided if he tried to play that card, she wouldn’t let him. If he did acknowledge it, she thought he’d punish her for tempting him.

Now that the door to talking seemed to be open, she moved closer. Taking her place on the couch a couple of feet from him, Shea sipped her coffee and thought about how good it was, much better than what they served in the mess that was for sure. After another few sips, she slipped off her shoes and slouched down to rest her head on the back of the couch.

“I’m learning new things about myself out here,” she said, closing her eyes.

“You don’t deal well with silence, do you, Poppet?”

Silence seemed to be his natural state. Sometimes Raid was so at peace. Shea didn’t mind it most of the time, but it wouldn’t serve her with him. “My time with you is so sparse, I figure I should make the most of it. Especially when I know your mood can turn so quickly.”

Taking his attention from the compound, he switched it to her and took a second to scan her relaxed form. “What scares you?”

That wasn’t an instant question, it was a deep one. He didn’t mean in this minute, he meant in life. What in life scared her? “Ummm…” Thinking about it, she curled her lips around her teeth and lifted her eyes to the clouds. “My plane fell out of the sky once, that was pretty scary.”

“Where were you going?”

“Ricardo Whey’s office,” she said, touching the foam on the edge of her cup. “He’s been professionally courting me for a while… was professionally courting me. I guess he thinks I’m dead now. Ricardo Whey is—”

“Of Whey Media Conglomerates. I know who he is,” he said and must have noticed her surprise. “Despite what you think you see, I’m a businessman. How else do you think I afford all of this? Keeping the sheep and the shepherds fed isn’t cheap.”

“How do you afford it?”

“Investments,” he said. “I have a healthy portfolio. I have business interests out there… in the world. Property, security, investigation networks.”

“Property?” she asked and smiled. “I’d hate to fall behind on rent if you were my landlord.”

“We only imprison those who default over five grand,” he said and took a mouthful of coffee. His eyes stayed on hers while he drank. She didn’t know how to react until he lowered his cup. “I’m kidding.”

A joke, from him, that was sort of unsettling. As much as she appreciated the attempt, she’d never assume anything he said was a joke, so it was best to wait for him to let her know rather than to laugh and get it wrong.

This conversation was giving her a chance to peek behind the curtain. At any time, he could shut her down or kick her out. Maybe it was her training, but she wasn’t going to shy from pushing boundaries, though she would be tentative and respectful about wheedling her way closer.

She’d always subscribed to the ideology that if she didn’t ask, she didn’t get. “How do you pick your prisoners?” A twitch at the corners of his eyes made her shrug. “Diego keeps me away from the records.”

That admission seemed to draw him in although he didn’t flinch again. “You know nothing about the prisoners?”

Nothing was an absolute statement, and she couldn’t claim to be completely ignorant. But, she had just learned something new. Even though he made the rules, he didn’t know everything.

“I know about inmate one zero three eight,” she said. Raid’s chin rose. “I know how grateful he is for what you do, for him and his family.”

Assuming that showing Raid how Diego trusted her might lead to him having a little more faith in her, Shea decided it couldn’t hurt to be honest… or to stroke his ego a little.

Except, Raid’s interest cooled. “He talks more than I like.”

Being a private person, and one who needed to be in control, Raid wouldn’t like anyone who had a loose tongue. She should’ve realized that, but didn’t like to be duplicitous. Diego had trusted her with what was his to share, he’d never betray the Laird, and she had to make that clear.

“He doesn’t talk about you. Diego, I mean. The only thing he told me about you is that you were born into this… and he told me that you don’t fuck around.”

“I don’t,” he said and put his cup on the table. “And I was.”

Good. It was incremental, but any progress had to be celebrated. Keeping her cool, Shea stayed calm so as not to spook him.

“Where are your parents?”

“Dead,” he said and nodded toward the forest.

On a roll, she was stunned at the implication, and too eager to let up. “Here? They died here?”

“My father did.”

“When?”

“Fifteen years ago,” he said and she smiled, which Raid must have considered an odd reaction. “What?”

Wondering if there was a chance he was drunk or under the influence of a drug, Shea actually felt lighter after hearing something about him from his own lips. “I didn’t expect you to be this forthcoming.”

Setting the boundaries obviously took a load off because he’d gone back to being his loose, relaxed self. “You can’t hurt me out here, Shea,” he said as he had the previous day. “And if you think you’ll get the chance to hurt me out there, Diego hasn’t told you your sentence.”

“Life,” she said and exhaled a cleansing breath. “I understand.” He peered at her, maybe wondering if she really did understand or not. “This place has a… magic about it. I can’t explain it. I thought I would hate every second and when I was in that cell I’d have done anything to be free. Except the longer I’m here…” She wasn’t sure what she was trying to say, so could only offer a shrug and a smile. “It grows on you.”

His blink was slow. “No woman’s ever made it out here.”

Unsure if that suggested someone had tried or not, Shea was curious about the woman who’d birthed her Laird. “Your mom didn’t like it?”

There was no hesitation in his answer. It wasn’t rushed, but he wasn’t dubious about sharing. “My mother never lived here,” he said. “She knew very little of what my father really was. She knew… parts. In the end, I knew more than she did.”

That was sort of sad. “Is she still alive? Out there somewhere?”

“No,” he said. “She died before he did.”

If his mother had died before his father, there was a chance that Raid had been a child when he’d lost her. After she was gone, his father must have taken custody of him. “And, that’s how you ended up out here?”

“I’ve lived here most of my life. My parents were together until she died. During her life, she let me come here with him. Though she didn’t know where we were when he did take me from her, she trusted he’d always bring me back… and he always did.”

It was a wonder, and she shook her head, amazed by it all. “I can’t imagine what she must have gone through,” she said, putting her cup on the table and twisting her legs up onto the couch beneath her. “The man she loved and her child just… disappearing, with no idea when they’d come back.”

“Not an easy life,” he said, turning his attention back to the compound.

It did make quite the view, the whole environment did. It created a stark juxtaposition, all the concrete and countryside existing side by side. With the clean scents of nature and the fresh air, she enjoyed just existing, letting her mind wander.

“I wonder if she had affairs,” she murmured, thinking about the need Raid’s mother might have had for comfort. Shea hadn’t meant to say it aloud, she hadn’t really thought about what she’d been going to say at all. The implication of what she’d said only hit her when Raid turned to her. “I’m sorry, I—”

“Look at me, Poppet,” he said, his glare becoming more intense. “What do you think I’d do to any man who touched the woman I loved?” The wicked ice that splintered from his cold stare made her shiver. “My father was ten times the man I am. My mother didn’t step out on him.”

No, she didn’t doubt that. If the woman had believed human life had any value, she wouldn’t have dared step out on her husband who had the capabilities to torture and kill any man who touched her.

If Raid’s father had loved his mother so much, Shea did have to wonder… “Why didn’t he bring her out here?”

“It’s no life for a woman,” he said. “That was my father’s stance. It’s procedure. This is a dangerous life. Keeping her away from here was protecting her.”

Shea had a feeling Raid’s mother was no simpering innocent. “If she gave birth to you, she was strong enough to handle it.”

“Think you’ll feel the same way in five years?” he asked. “What about in ten?”

“I think,” she said, stroking the pillow at the back of the couch. “If your father loved your mother, he trusted her, so she wouldn’t have been a prisoner here. She could have visited and gone back to the real world, she wouldn’t have uttered a word about this place.”

Whatever Shea said either didn’t break through to Raid or he knew better. “Do you know what kind of danger the people who work here are in?” he asked. “Our location might be a secret, but we’re not unknown. There are people out there in the real world, as you put it, who know we exist, even if they don’t know where, and that information could be valuable.”

That put a new perspective on what Raid’s father was trying to do, though it didn’t change her opinion. “I just know I would want to be at my husband’s side. Your mother was at risk whether she knew the location of the compound or not,” she said. “She loved him. Your father’s enemies could’ve used her to get to him. They could’ve used you.”

“Which was why she always had security, whether she knew about it or not, and why I was trained in combat from the minute I could stand upright.”

Everything new she learned about Raid enticed her more. “You can fight?” she asked and smiled, shifting further down the couch on her knees. “That’s hot.”

His eye narrowed. “Diego told me you didn’t flirt.”

“I don’t,” she said and shrugged. “I’m not a girl who’s short of confidence and I’m not shy about sex, though I am smart about it, and I told you why yesterday.”

Leaning closer, he peered into her. “Yet, you do it with me. How am I to believe you don’t do it with every man down there?” He bobbed his chin toward the compound, but kept his eyes on her. “I told you already, screwing me won’t get you special privileges… and I won’t trust you. I won’t facilitate your escape. Life is life here.”

She couldn’t blame him for being wary. “If I flirted with the men down there, I would incite a riot, and I’d get myself hurt. The guys at the top, Diego’s men, they’re smart, and they can be kind… at least they… understand the way it is. I trust them because Diego does, Kipling and Lev, all of those guys, they’re like brothers. The guys at the lower levels, well, they’re not so smart. I understand that I have to be careful around them. And, I’ll be honest,” she said. When she hesitated, he nodded once, prompting her to continue. “D’s been my safety net and last night was something of a first for me… being in the mess without him.”

Raid didn’t take any time to think about his next comment. “We’ll have food brought to your room instead of—”

“If I’m going to be here in five years, I have to be able to find my own way, and the truth is… I’m prepared for it.”

The last thing she wanted was to be a prisoner so soon after being freed from a cell. Even without locks and steel doors a person could still be held captive. Yes, she was learning her way, but she didn’t want Raid cutting off her path to fitting in. Shea would get more respect from the others if she could stand up for herself and eating with them was the best time for her to form connections.

If Raid decided to isolate her, he could do it, even without putting her back in solitary. Limiting her contact with others, excluding her from social time, giving her a permanent chaperone, they were all ways of cutting her off. It might not be malicious; he might not even mean to punish her. There was danger around and he was conscious of it. Shea just didn’t want him to make the mistake of believing she was ignorant to it.

“Prepared for…”

She hadn’t even told Diego that she’d reached this conclusion and there she was confessing it to Raid. “One day I’m going to be cornered by someone I don’t want to be cornered by. I know alcohol is only allowed on certain occasions, and I haven’t been around for those yet. Maybe when the guys are drunk I’ll find out what they’re really like. I don’t know. It’s been my experience that men can be… unreasonable when they’re drunk.”

For a moment, he just regarded her without expression. “You expect to be violated? In one breath, you tell me that the compound is growing on you while in the next, you tell me you expect to be raped?”

That was one possible outcome, but not the only one she was preparing herself for. “I expect to be killed, Raid,” she said and shock impacted him so hard that he sat straighter. “If any man tries to put his hands on me against my will, I’ll fight, it’s what I’ve always done, and I won’t change that now…” That hadn’t been what she’d said in the yard. This gave her the chance to find out more about the essence of their leader. “Unless you’re giving me another direct order to—”

He moved closer. “I will never give that order,” he said, his elbow hooked over the back of the couch by her shoulder. His fingers drifted toward her face, but he closed his fist, pulling them back before they could make contact. “Any man who tries to touch you against your will won’t see the next sunrise, you have my word.”

A quiver of desire in her chest made her reach for him. Curling her fingers around his wrist, she guided his loose fist to her cheekbone. “Raid,” she whispered, turning her face toward his hand as it relaxed further.

His fingers didn’t unfurl all the way, no matter how she tried to tempt them. “Go back to work, Poppet,” he said, easing his wrist out of her grip.

She blinked and nodded. He was her boss. Even if she’d rather stay here and explore what he may reveal to her, she had to follow his orders. Rising to prove her compliance, she let her fingertips drift over his hand and headed for the door, glancing back to make brief eye contact before she stepped into the house to return to her job.