“I have something to tell you,” Cora said as she knocked on the door to Haven’s room and walked in.
“I probably know what it is,” Haven said from where she sat on the bed, back against the headboard. She was under the covers despite being fully dressed and it not even being dinnertime yet. Ever since her talk with Dare, she’d been mindlessly watching cooking shows, although she couldn’t actually have said what kind of food they’d been making. “Where were you?” She pulled her gaze from the TV.
“I was hanging with Jeb over in the chop shop watching him work on his bike. And then Phoenix came and found me,” Cora said, crawling onto the bed and getting in under the covers next to her.
Sitting shoulder to shoulder, Haven looked at her best friend. “So you know we’re going to be leaving soon? Getting new names and identities and being set up somewhere else?”
Cora nodded, but Haven couldn’t read any reaction in her expression. “Yeah. What do you think?” Cora asked.
“I mean, yeah. It’s great,” Haven said, nodding. And working really hard to be positive.
Frowning, Cora tilted her head. “Why don’t I believe you?”
“You should,” Haven said. “Starting a whole new life is exactly what we wanted.” It was. But a funny thing had happened. Haven felt like she’d already started living that new life. Right here. With the Ravens. That was probably stupid, considering that no one had ever once suggested this as anything more than a way station until they figured out what was next, but she couldn’t help how she felt.
“You do remember that I am your best and longest friend, right?” Cora arched an eyebrow.
“Uh, yeah, of course,” Haven said.
“Here, give me that.” Cora grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. She shifted to sit facing Haven. “So be honest with me. Because I can hear in your voice that you’re not thrilled. It’s Dare, isn’t it? What the heck happened to the two of you this afternoon anyway? He took off after you and Jeb like he was pissed or something.”
Haven liked how Cora didn’t even wait for the answer to her question. She knew Haven too well. “He stopped Jeb, said he needed me, and took me for a really awesome ride up to this beautiful lake . . .” She stopped there out of both embarrassment over the thought of describing what’d happened afterward and fear that trying to describe it would beckon the tears she’d been fighting since she left Dare’s office.
Cora squeezed her knee over the blanket. “And then?”
“And then, stuff happened,” she said in a quiet voice.
“Well, you know that isn’t gonna fly, my dear.” Cora scooted closer. “Spill.”
Heat crept into Haven’s cheeks as she searched for the words.
“Oh, good stuff,” Cora said, laughter in her voice.
“I splashed him,” Haven said, remembering the look of surprise he’d worn, and how he’d chased her. Caught her. “Next thing I knew, he tackled me onto the beach, and then . . . we were kissing and he was touching me with his hands and, uh, his mouth.” God, her cheeks were on actual fire. At least, that’s how they felt.
Cora gasped. “He went down on you? Aw, lucky you. Did you like it? Was he good?”
Haven opened her mouth to answer, and burst out crying. Yes, she liked it. Yes, it was good. And, yes, she wasn’t thrilled about leaving the Ravens because she didn’t want to leave Dare. And it felt like someone was ripping out her heart.
“Oh, sweetie,” Cora said, embracing her.
It took Haven the better part of a half hour to rein in her emotions and finish recounting her afternoon with Dare—right through the conversation in his office.
“I didn’t mean for it to happen,” she said, scrubbing the last of the wetness from her face, “but I like him. And I like it here. And now we have to leave.”
“Maybe you should just tell him that,” Cora said, giving her a small, sad smile.
“It wouldn’t matter,” Haven said. “Dare said the Ravens decided this was what they wanted to do—they think it’s what’s best for us, and the reward puts everyone here in danger, too. How could I stay here if it meant my father might hurt the people trying to help us? All because I have a crush on a man who has no problem sending me away?” She shook her head.
“I think it’s more than a crush,” Cora said in a quiet voice. “Don’t you?”
Haven wasn’t exactly sure what she felt. All she knew was that her chest ached and her stomach hurt and everything inside her rebelled at the thought of leaving. “It doesn’t really matter though, does it? Because he wants me to go. And I have to go.” Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. She didn’t want to talk about herself anymore. “I’m just sorry that you’re caught up in all this, too.”
“Don’t be crazy, Haven. I’m here because I want to be. And I wouldn’t be anywhere else.”
Haven forced her eyelids open and looked at her friend—and saw nothing but sincerity on her pretty face. “I am glad you’re here.”
“Of course you are,” Cora said. “Because I’m awesome.”
Chuckling, Haven nodded. “You are.”
“You know what? Don’t worry, okay?” Cora clasped her hand. “Whatever happens, we’ll be together. Let’s trust that for now.”
“Yeah,” Haven said, working at a smile.
“I have an idea.” Cora swung her legs off the bed. “I’m going to go downstairs and whip us up some dinner and snacks, and then you and I are going to get crumbs all in the bed and watch movies until we fall asleep.”
Exactly the kind of thing Cora used to do back in Georgia to cheer Haven up and distract her from the rest of her life. And it proved how well Cora knew her. Because Haven felt too shaky inside to go downstairs and be among a big group of people, and, truth be told, she felt bad for not once thinking about the kind of trouble she might be bringing to the Ravens’ door. “Sounds great,” Haven said. “I’ll look for some movies.”
Fifteen minutes later, Cora knocked on the door, and then came into the room followed by Phoenix.
“Hey, Haven,” he said with a small smile. He was carrying a big tray loaded down with food and drinks.
“Hi,” she said, chuckling. “Cora has you doing her heavy lifting, I see.”
Grinning, he nodded. “I’m sure I’ll get a favor back in return some time.” He settled the tray on the nightstand next to Haven.
“Don’t hold your breath,” Cora said, more than a little amusement painting her expression. “Here’s your tip. Don’t eat the yellow snow.”
Phoenix folded his hands over his heart like he was wounded. “Aw, why ya gotta do me like that?” Haven watched the two of them as they exchanged banter, and it became clear as the back and forth escalated that it was more than that. They were flirting. And Haven could totally see why. Phoenix was funny and outgoing and overflowing with confidence, a lot like Cora. “Fine, fine,” he finally said as he backed toward the door. “I’ll go nurse my wounded ego elsewhere.”
“Thank you, Phoenix,” Cora said in a singsong voice.
For a moment, Phoenix hung at the door, and then he looked at Haven. “For what it’s worth, I’m really sorry everything has to go down like this. You all fit in great around here. I wish you could stay.”
The sentiment poked at the ache that had been lingering in Haven’s chest. “Thank you, Phoenix.”
He nodded, then pulled the door closed behind him.
“Well, look at him being all sweet,” Cora said, her expression more than a little moved.
“You like him,” Haven said. “I’m not the only one crushing on a Raven. You like him, too.”
Cora rolled her eyes and busied her hands with the food. “He’s easy to look at and fun to tease,” Cora said. “But I’m not interested in him. Really. Besides, they say he’s a total player. No, thank you.” Haven eyeballed her, but nothing about Cora’s expression or behavior belied her words. “Now, what movies did you find? Because girls’ night in is officially on.”
THE KNOCK WOKE Haven from a dead sleep. “Was that the movie?” she asked, looking to Cora.
Her friend was already sliding off the bed. “Nope, but I’ll get it.”
“What time is it?” Haven asked, yawning and stretching on the bed.
“After ten.” Cora pulled open the door. “Oh, hi, Dare.”
“Cora,” he said, stepping into the room. “I’m sorry to bother you all.” His gaze cut to Haven and moved over her body, and she felt it like it was his fingers, not his eyes, that had caressed her skin.
She pushed herself into a sitting position, suddenly self-conscious about her appearance. After they’d eaten, she and Cora had slipped into pajamas, which for Haven meant an oversized T-shirt Bunny had given her. Cora at least had on a pair of men’s boxers rolled at the waist.
“Dare,” Haven breathed.
“I should’ve given you more notice,” he said, shifting on his boots. God, he was hot standing there in his cut, tattoos running over his biceps, his hair looking like he’d been running his hand through it.
“For what?” she asked.
He looked from Cora to Haven. “Bunny has a friend who runs a beauty shop, and she agreed to come over after she closed up tonight to do your hair.”
Cora’s eyes went wide. “You’re getting your hair done? Wait. Why are you having it done here and not at the shop?” She frowned at Dare. “What’s going on?”
“Oh, uh,” he said, clearly uncomfortable to be put on the spot.
“The Ravens thought it would be a good idea for me to change my hair. Too unique given the length. And it’s perfect timing, because you know I’ve been wanting a change.” She gave Cora a pointed look and hoped her friend got the message. Don’t contradict me.
“Uh-huh,” Cora said, not sounding very convincing at all.
But it must’ve done the trick for Dare, because he nodded and turned for the door. “Well, she’s getting set up down in the kitchen, so, if you want to get dressed and come on down?” His gaze lingered on her bare legs for a moment, and then cut back to her face.
“Yup. Be right down,” she said.
He nodded and closed the door behind him.
Waiting no more than five seconds, Cora turned and planted her hands on her hips. “What the hell, Haven?”
Haven flew off the bed. “I don’t want to do it, okay? But they think it’s too noticeable, and Dare’s pretty convinced there’s a good chance my dad or his men are nearby. They think I need a disguise, just until we leave here.”
Cora shook her head, her mouth opening and closing like she wasn’t sure what to say.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you speechless before,” Haven said, crossing to the chair and stepping into her jeans. She changed into a tank top so that her sleep shirt didn’t get all hairy.
“I want you to cut your hair when you’re ready to do it, not because you have to do it. Why didn’t you tell me?” Cora asked.
Haven hugged herself. “I didn’t want to be a baby about it.”
“Stop that right now,” Cora said, coming right up to her and fingering the loose blond wisps hanging around Haven’s face. “I know how much you love your hair. I’m sorry you have to do this.”
Haven waved a hand. “It’s just hair, right? It’ll grow out.” The words were for herself as much as they were for Cora.
“That’s right. And you would be gorgeous if you were bald.” She squeezed Haven’s shoulder.
Haven grimaced. “Let’s not test that theory.”
Chuckling, Cora nodded and headed for the door. “Give me a minute to throw on some clothes and I’ll come down with you.”
“I’d like that,” Haven said. Besides, Cora could talk a mile a minute and would provide the perfect distraction from the fact that Haven wasn’t really ready to do this. Her father hadn’t given her money or approval to go out to do things like getting a haircut because it didn’t serve him in any way, so the last time she’d had one she’d been sixteen. Or maybe it was fifteen? She couldn’t even remember.
Cora popped back in wearing jeans and a tee not a minute later. “Okay, I’m ready. Are you?”
“SHE’LL BE RIGHT down,” Dare said, walking back into the kitchen. Bunny stood at the counter, pouring a cup of coffee, while her friend Joan set up a makeshift shop on the kitchen table. Two towels lay over the back of a chair pulled out into the middle of the floor.
“Don’t worry, Dare. Joan’s great. So good she’s usually booked weeks ahead of time. She’ll take care of Haven,” Bunny said.
Dare nodded, though he didn’t care if Joan was the best hair stylist who ever lived. None of that would make a difference to Haven if she really didn’t want this done. Despite how much sense Phoenix’s words made back in Church, for right that moment, Dare didn’t feel that much different from her father. Or, at least, he feared that she’d feel that way. And he wouldn’t blame her.
A few minutes later, Haven and Cora came in. Haven’s face was scrubbed clean and her hair was a little messy from sleep, but she was showing the most skin he’d ever seen in a skimpy pink tank top—well, except for when he’d found her in bed wearing nothing but a men’s white T-shirt. Without even trying, she’d looked sexy as fuck, making him wish he’d been there for a totally different reason.
“Ah, Haven, this is my friend Joan.” Bunny made introductions and the women exchanged greetings, Haven shaking the older lady’s hand.
“Have a seat, hon,” Joan said, tucking the side of what Dare supposed was a stylish cut behind her ear. “And tell me what you’re thinking.”
“Oh, well.” Haven slid into the chair, looking small and even a bit fragile. She had a way of doing that, suddenly shrinking into herself as if to make a smaller target, or to blend into the background. “Mostly, just different,” she said. And that was the moment Dare knew she wanted no part of this. Because what woman didn’t know exactly what she wanted done to her hair?
“Stop,” Dare said. “You don’t have to do this.”
Frowning, Haven peered up at him. “Yes, I do.” She turned to Joan. “Shorter. Maybe up to here,” she said, holding her hand flat against the top of her biceps to mark an invisible line.
Joan unwound the band holding the length of Haven’s hair in a braid. “Do you want any color?”
“Uh.” She glanced to Cora. “Maybe . . . maybe I do. But I don’t know much about it.”
Haven was doing exactly what he told her to do, and he hated it. He shoved off the counter and stalked out of the kitchen, through the clubhouse, and into the rec room. A few guys playing pool called out a greeting, but Dare only had eyes for the bar, where he grabbed a glass and poured himself some whiskey. He tossed it back, savoring the burn, and then poured some more.
Fuck, what was he doing? If she was going to suffer through having the change made, then he sure as shit could man up and sit with her while it happened. Whiskey in hand, he returned to the kitchen.
“I don’t think we should go too dark because of how fair you are,” Joan was saying. “But a light brown would give you a change without washing you out. We could even do some low lights to give it more depth. And brown would be so pretty with those gorgeous blue eyes.”
Gorgeous blue eyes which held so much uncertainty. But Haven pushed through whatever doubts she had, because she agreed to Joan’s suggestions and watched as the woman set about mixing solutions in small bowls with brushes. Finally, Joan wrapped a towel around Haven’s shoulders and clipped it together in front of her throat.
“All ready, hon?” she asked Haven with a smile.
Haven’s gaze went to Cora again, and the other woman gave her a small nod. Licking her lips, Haven glanced to him. “Wait. Can I have a drink of that?”
“The whiskey?” Dare asked, lifting the glass.
She nodded and accepted the tumbler into her hand. Tipping the crystal to her lips, she took a long enough drink that she almost emptied the glass. “Okay,” she said, passing it back to Dare. “Let’s do this.”
Fucking hell. He emptied the glass and tried not to think about the fact that it’d just been between her lips.
“You’re cutting off so much length, you should consider donating the hair to one of the organizations that uses it to make wigs for cancer patients. I could take care of that for you if you like,” Joan said, sectioning the long lengths into small ponytails and wrapping them in rubber bands.
“People do that?” Haven asked, her eyes going wide. “Because I would love to do that.”
“Oh, yeah,” Joan said. “You’re a great candidate for that with all this beautiful hair.”
Dare feared that the words might make Haven hesitate, but instead, she smiled genuinely for the first time since she’d come downstairs, like she wasn’t just resigned about getting her hair cut, but interested in doing it. “I love that idea so much,” she said.
Well, what do you know? When the cut was about protecting herself, she seemed to regret doing it, but now that the cut could help someone else, Haven was suddenly more enthusiastic. As if he didn’t already admire enough about her. Because he really did.
One by one, Joan chopped each of the ponytails off, showing Haven as each one came free.
“No going back now,” Haven said, smiling at Cora.
“It’s gonna be great,” Cora said. “Just you wait.”
For the next hour, Haven sat and chatted with the other women while Joan painted a solution onto Haven’s hair and wrapped chunks of it in foil.
“Maybe I’ll just go with this look,” Haven said when her whole head was covered in aluminum. “What do you all think?” The women all laughed and joked.
Bunny kept giving Dare odd looks, probably wondering why he was hanging around for what was clearly a female bonding ritual, but he didn’t want to leave Haven, even though he wasn’t really contributing a damn thing or helping in any substantive way. He stood against the counter, arms crossed, and every once in a while he’d respond to a text message or check his e-mail to see if the photo of her father had come in yet.
As the foil came off, Dare got the first glimpse of her new dark hair. He’d found the blond striking from the very first time they met, but Jesus if she wasn’t gorgeous with brown hair, too, and not lacking a single iota of the brightness and lightness that he associated with her.
Joan spent more time cutting, and then finally blow-drying, until she was asking Haven, “Well, what do you think?” She handed her a mirror.
A total fucking knockout. That’s what Dare thought. Maybe a little edgier and definitely a lot sexier, but still very much the Haven he— Well, the Haven he’d come to know.
“It feels so much lighter,” Haven said, turning her head back and forth to make it move. She played with the ends as she looked in the mirror. “And so much wavier now.”
“You were long overdue, my dear. It’s so much healthier now,” Joan said, wiping her hands on a towel.
Haven nodded as she continued to look at herself, an awed expression on her face.
“It’s so much shinier now, too,” Cora said. “God, you look freaking fantastic, Haven.”
“I like it,” she said, a big smile lighting up her face. “I like it a lot.” She shot to her feet and gave Joan a hug. “Thank you so much.”
“Oh,” Joan said, caught off guard. The older woman laughed and patted Haven’s back. “You are more than welcome. It’s not every day that I get to give a complete makeover like this. I enjoyed myself.”
“How come you never make me look that good?” Bunny asked, winking at Haven as she brought over a broom.
“Oh, Bunny, you and me both,” Joan said as the women laughed.
The happiness on Haven’s face was a sucker-punch to the gut—Dare was relieved and glad to see it, but also completely blindsided by how damn important it had become to him to see Haven happy. When the hell had that happened? And what did it even mean?
“What do you think, Dare? Do I look different enough?” Haven asked, smiling at him.
“You look good,” he said, unable to hold back the compliment and play it cool. “Really good.”
She grinned like he’d just given her the best present ever. “Well, thank you,” she said. “If it wasn’t for you, I never would’ve known how much I’d like this.”
She was . . . thanking him? Beyond floored, Dare shifted his feet and nodded. “Yeah, of course.” Just then, his cell phone rang. “Better get this,” he said, and then he ducked out of the room—as much to keep his mouth from running away from him as to find out what news might be coming down the line.
HAVEN WASN’T THE least surprised she hadn’t been able to fall back to sleep. Yesterday had been quite possibly the most eventful day of her life—between the motorcycle ride with Dare, what had happened between them at the beach, the club’s decision on relocating them, and having her hair changed. Her brain was like a merry-go-round with no Off switch.
And she was just as happy to be up, because it gave her time she hadn’t taken in a few days to do some baking—cinnamon buns and peanut butter cookies, because of how popular both had been the last time she’d made them.
Waiting for the dough for the buns to rise, Haven lined up balls of cookie dough on the baking sheet and flattened them with presses of a fork. Within minutes of putting the cookies in the oven, the kitchen smelled incredible—like rich peanut butter and sweet cinnamon. Mindlessly filling the minutes until the cookies would be done, she cleaned up and wondered how many more things she could make here before they had to leave. Would her new place have a nice kitchen she could bake in?
A shiver of dread ran over her. Wherever they moved, how were they supposed to live? Cora had waitressing experience, but Haven had no skills at all. She’d never held a job in her life and didn’t even have a high school diploma. The unknowns that lay before her were so numerous she could barely think on them all.
When she’d left Georgia, there’d been a lot of unknowns then, too, of course. But she’d believed to the depths of her soul that whatever happened, wherever she went, it would all be better than where she’d been—trapped in hell with her father.
Now that she’d lived with the Ravens for nearly a month, she wasn’t sure she could believe the same. It was good here. How did she know whatever came next would be, too? Because now that she’d found safety and good people and a little sliver of happiness, the prospect of giving it up hurt in a way that her father’s mean comments and treatment never had. Because she hadn’t let that get under her skin. She’d refused.
But this place . . . oh, and Dare—he was so far under her skin she wasn’t sure how she’d ever get him out. Or if she’d ever find another man who made her feel all the things he did.
The timer on the oven went off, pulling Haven from her thoughts. She scooped the cookies onto a flat expanse of aluminum foil to cool, having made six dozen total. When the ovens reached the correct temperature, she put the buns in to bake next.
Waiting again, sleepiness finally hit her, so Haven busied herself with cleaning up to keep awake. A little before five in the morning, the buns were done and iced, giving Haven just enough time to grab a few hours’ sleep before breakfast—which she planned to attend.
If they only had a few more days here before they had to go, Haven didn’t want to spend another second of it hiding out in her room. Because who knew if she’d ever feel as safe again as she did with the Ravens.
And with Dare.