Sara Beth plucked the edge of the blanket hem. Rosie finally called, saying she would be in to visit sometime that morning. But lunch passed and still no sign of her sister.

 

The seven days since Rosie had left during their fight had been, for lack of a better word, exhausting. Rosie called every morning, asked how Sara Beth was, if she was ready for a visit. When Sara Beth answered in the negative, Rosie left it alone – almost relieved sounding.

 

But this time was different. Rosie hadn’t asked, she’d told Sara Beth she’d be there before lunch.

 

Sara Beth leaned her head back on the pillows she was fast growing tired of. She wanted out of that hospital room. Claustrophobia hit her almost as hard as it did at Rourke Ranch.

 

Each afternoon, Johnny visited, bearing some kind of corny story or gossip from the Circuit about people Sara Beth only read about on the Circuit blog and in the monthly newsletter. She looked forward to his stops more than the idea of getting out of the hospital.

 

Knock, knock, knock.

 

Sara Beth jerked her head up, fingers clenching her thin hospital gown.

 

Rosie walked in, carrying a duffel bag and Sara Beth’s box. She set them on the counter beside the in-room sink and cabinet. Facing Sara Beth, she plastered on a pleasant expression – for lack of a better term – and moved close enough to lean in for a brief hug. She squeezed lightly, before pulling back. “You look good.”

 

Uncomfortable with the entire situation, Sara Beth pulled her lips tight in what she hoped settled for a welcoming grimace. “Thanks, you do, too. You brought my box?”

 

“I brought you some books to read also and I know you like looking over those pictures and things, so I brought them along.” Rosie claimed the seat she’d been in before and crossed her legs, uncrossed them, then crossed them again.

 

Watching her, Sara Beth envied the ability to display discomfort so easily. She finally broke the silence. The erratic behavior wasn’t like her sister and her restlessness bred anxiety in Sara Beth’s stomach. “What’s going on, Rosie?”

 

Blonde hair loose around her shoulders, Rosie pushed a swath of it behind her. “The garden’s in. Michael set up the fence perfectly. I don’t see any deer getting in there easily, although, if a persistent moose tries, there goes the crop.” She clasped her fingers in her lap and chewed on her lip.

 

Sensing she wasn’t getting the entire story, Sara Beth tucked her chin to her chest, eyeing Rosie. “What aren’t you telling me?”

 

“Um, well. There’s a couple things we need to talk about.” Rosie studied the railing of Sara Beth’s bed before lifting her gaze to her sister’s face.

 

“Okay, shoot.” Hopefully, Rosie didn’t want to talk about Sara Beth’s urine bag. A catheter had been installed shortly after she’d arrived and Sara Beth covered the bag every time someone came in. But she’d forgotten just before Rosie had come because she hadn’t been on time.

 

Nodding shortly, Rosie continued. “You’re right. Best just to spit it out.” She straightened her shoulders and smoothed her expression. “Okay. I talked to the doctor this morning on the phone before coming in. He said you most likely won’t walk again. It’s not guaranteed, but it’s something that you should be prepared for.”

 

The lights seemed to flicker as Sara Beth blinked rapidly. “I’m sorry, what? That’s not what he said to me. I just saw him this morning. What?” How could it be true? She most likely wouldn’t walk again? And Rosie delivered the news so controlled, so blasé. “He’d been so optimistic that physical therapy and other treatment would be productive. I don’t understand.” Confused, she rubbed at her temple.

 

“I know, honey, but he can’t tell you something pessimistic, you know? From what I understand the inflammation can go down, they just don’t know when. I think it’s encouraging that he said you’re not guaranteed to be completely immobile for the rest of your life. There’s so much you can do with that…” Rosie’s voice faded in the background. Her lips moved, but Sara Beth couldn’t hear her. Chose not to hear anymore. 

 

Studying her worthless feet poking toward the ceiling under the blankets, Sara Beth allowed the ever-present chill of the IV fluid to send her body into a violent shake. Her arms shook and she moved in a jerky back-and-forth manner.

 

But her legs didn’t move.

 

Like watching from far off, Sara Beth acknowledged Rosie’s alarmed yell, the quick arrival of nurses and someone shout she was having a seizure.

 

She raised her arms shoving them away. “I’m not. Stop! I’m not having a seizure.” The shaking didn’t slow. Her teeth clacked together and a memory of being pulled into someone’s warm arms flashed in her mind. She pulled the blanket up to her chin and huddled as her body continued shaking – well, everything from the waist up shook. Who knows what the heck was happening with her legs and toes.

 

A nurse pressed the back of her hand to Sara Beth’s forehead and then felt along her neck and arms. “Miss Scott, you’re freezing. I’ll bring in a bag warmer and some warm blankets.” And she bustled out of the room. Returning a moment later, she walked in, arms filled with a blanket folded into an envelope and two more identical blankets to the one Sara Beth already shook under.

 

“I don’t think that’s going to help much.” Sara Beth pushed out through quivering lips.

 

The nurse briskly yanked Sara Beth’s current blanket from her form. “Just wait. We put these in the warming ovens by the nurses’ station.” She unfolded each blanket to lie directly onto Sara Beth.

 

Immediate heat acted like a salve, and Sara Beth’s tremors disappeared. “Oh, wow, that’s amazing. Thank you.” She couldn’t keep her eyes from closing under the warming onslaught. 

 

The nurse then pulled the original blanket over Sara Beth and her new toastier covers. “I brought this IV packet, too. It should warm up the fluids before going in your arm.” She pulled the packet up over the bag and secured it with a cord around the metal hook holding the bag suspended above the bed. Patting Sara Beth’s shoulder, she nodded. “That should help. Now let us know if you start to get too cold again. Your sensors are out of whack and you need to pay attention, okay?”

 

Sara Beth reveled in the warmth of the blankets. After the nurse left, she looked at Rosie. “I didn’t even know I was cold. Usually, I feel it in my legs or my feet, but I…” She swallowed back tears and a frustrated scream which had been stuck in the back of her throat for days. “Anyway, we covered the first point. I’ll deal with that later. What’s the rest?”

 

“You’re going to be in here a while.” Rosie watched Sara Beth carefully, as if she might actually go into a seizure. She rushed on with no immediate reaction visible. “We have to wait until the apparent swelling of the spinal cord goes down before they can know for sure, what the prognosis is. I can’t get a nurse in for two more weeks because a physical therapist also has to be involved. I’m looking for the best. You deserve the best.” She shut her mouth, her words trailing off into the room like fading smoke.

 

Sara Beth’s short one-burst laugh burst through the smoky words like an arrow. “We can’t afford the best. We can’t afford for me to stay in here. Not on the small amount you make waitressing two nights a week. What do you think will happen? I’m going to stand and walk tomorrow?” She leaned forward as far as her limitations would allow and poked at her thigh. “I can’t even sit on the toilet like this. I’m stuck in this stupid bed. You live with your boyfriend. I know —” Sara Beth held up her hand. “You’re not sleeping with him, you’re just dating.” She rolled her eyes, gritting her teeth. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you now have an invalid for a sister. Who’s going to want that around forever, right? It’s me and I don’t want me around.”

 

How fast would they get evicted from the ranch now? Where would they go? Sara Beth couldn’t work. She’d burden Rosie for the rest of their lives.

 

Heaving backwards against the bed, Sara Beth looked toward the ceiling, pissed at the tears threatening to push her over the edge as well as choke her to death as she held her emotions back. “What else do you have to tell me?” Her strangled whisper demanded Rosie share it fast and then get going. Sara Beth didn’t want anyone there to see her lose it.

 

“I’m… I mean, well, last night… in the garden… Michael proposed.” She awkwardly held up her left hand where a brilliant sparkling circle marked Rosie has Rourke territory.

 

Sara Beth dropped her chin, but kept her mouth shut for the full minute the news took to sink in. Staring at the ring, Sara Beth wanted to scream. Who the hell was Rosie anyway? Getting engaged while her only – okay, not only by technical terms – but still only sister lay held up in the hospital? How could she just move on?

 

“Say something, Sara Beth.” Rosie’s eyes pleaded as she lowered her hand and hid it in her lap.

 

Instead of laughing at Rosie and her obvious need for Sara Beth’s approval, Sara Beth just gave it to her. “That’s great. Congratulations. It’s a beautiful ring.” She pushed her tongue against the flat surface of the back of her top teeth.

 

Get out. She wanted to scream. Not because she wasn’t happy for her sister, but because she couldn’t be happy for herself.

 

“See? I can get you the best help.” Rosie’s eyes lit up, hope curling her lips into a smile meant to reassure Sara Beth.

 

“You mean, Michael can.” Folding her arms under the warm blankets, Sara Beth shook her head. “No, thanks. I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I can’t take charity for this. I don’t… want help.” She didn’t want to need it.

 

“No, you need physical therapy.” Rosie’s smile faltered and she glanced at Sara Beth’s inert legs. “And I know you don’t want help, but it’s unavoidable, Sara Beth. I’m sorry that you’re going through this. I really am. I wouldn’t wish this on Caracus himself. But, you are and I’m here to help you. Michael wants to help. We can take care of you.”

 

“I don’t want to be taken care of!” Sara Beth sobbed, the tears pushing the wall of control just to the edge, almost spilled.

 

Rosie jerked back, like Sara Beth had slapped her.

 

Johnny appeared in the doorway, his knuckle out to rap on the open doorway. “Sara Beth, I have a puzzle—” His gaze fell on Rosie and then darted to Sara Beth. His eyebrows lifted and he paused entering the room. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had company today. I’ll wait out here.” He offered politely and ducked back the way he came.

 

Rosie turned to Sara Beth, eyes wide and lips slightly parted. “What is he doing here?”

 

“He’s been here every day visiting me since I arrived.” Sara Beth lifted her chin. If Rosie could move on, then Sara Beth didn’t have any problem trying to do the same. Not that she could move much as a paraplegic.

 

“Every day? Do you know why he’s not working for his own uncle anymore? He sexually harassed a woman. And there’re rumors that he might have assaulted her. I don’t think you need to be around him. From what I understand, he can’t even get a job anywhere.” Rosie lowered her voice to a raised whisper. “I’ll have hospital security remove him.”

 

“No, you will not. That is ridiculous.” Sara Beth refused to hide their conversation. “He’s not sexually harassing me, Rosie. And yeah, he’s visited me. He’s been the only one. I know I told you not to come, but he came and didn’t ask. He rescued me.” She considered her sister for a moment before adding, “He needs a job and I want you to make sure he gets one at Rourke Ranch.”

 

Hospitals, late at night, had a terrible habit of leaving one feeling worse than alone and Johnny had dispelled that feeling every day for Sara Beth. Her debt to him stacked against her. 

 

“I don’t feel comfortable with him being here.” Rosie pressed her lips together and shook her head. “Let alone with us at the ranch.”

 

“Well, that’s too bad. I like him. He’s very nice and we have a lot to talk about.” Sara Beth shrugged. “Please, make it happen. He deserves our help.”

 

“You know boys are only after one thing, Sara Beth.” Rosie lifted one eyebrow and shook her finger at Sara Beth with all the wisdom she could muster.

 

A sharp bark of laughter burst from Sara Beth. “You have to be kidding me, right? Have you seen me? No one is going to want to take me on. I’m a mess. Plus, he’s from the Circuit. Do you have any idea how many beautiful women he’s around all the time? I wouldn’t stand a chance.” She reached out and ran her fingers on her leg to her shin and back to her thigh. “Not that I have any chance with anyone like this, you know?”

 

“I heard the woman is suing the Circuit for millions.” Rosie’s hushed whisper trimmed Sara Beth’s already slim patience.

 

“I don’t care. Please, make sure Michael gives him a job. We were down on our luck a few times, too. Give him a hand up, please!” Sara Beth didn’t ask. She didn’t feel like it and if she asked, then it would open up room for an argument.

 

Rosie considered Sara Beth. “A job? That’s it? This isn’t like a ploy to somehow get into the Circuit yourself?”

 

“Seriously? They would never even consider me. And yes, that’s it. Keep him around. He’s a good guy. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know him.” Surprised at the truth behind that statement, Sara Beth really hoped Rosie and Michael would hire Johnny for the ranch. If nothing else, Sara Beth might be able to see her friend more.

 

Because no matter what Rosie suggested, Sara Beth and Johnny could only ever be friends.