Chapter Thirty-Seven
Evie
My head hurt, and my knee was throbbing. Those were the thoughts I had before I even opened my eyes. The steady beat of the machines above my head proved that I’d lived. I stretched one arm, reaching for Nicky, only to hit nothing but mattress.
“Nicky?” I sat up suddenly, the motion causing my head to swim.
“He’s out, getting both of you a change of clothes.”
I froze. “Dad?”
He stood from a chair that was pulled up next to my bed. “Hey, baby girl.” He took my hand in his, squeezing it tightly. “How’re you feeling?” He had tears in his eyes and his voice sounded a little shaky.
“Dad, what are you doing here?” I took my hands back, pushing myself into a sitting position and turning on the small light overhead.
“Your boyfriend called me.” He wiped at his face with a Kleenex that looked like it’d seen better days. Nicky had called my dad? Behind my back? “I can see you getting angry, Evie, but don’t.” He sat on the edge of my bed, reaching once again for my hand. “He was right to call. He loves you so much, and he wants what is best for you.”
What was best for me was to get well, to heal. To move on. “What happened tonight, I don’t want it all over the news. I don’t want everyone to have to go through a trial. Our family. The media. Dad, it’s going to be a disaster.” A disaster that will tell the world about my addictions. Which means everyone will compare me to my father, dragging his past out to haunt him.
“Stop.” He shook his head. “That guy will be punished, and we will press charges. He will not get away with what he did to you. Fuck the media.”
He didn’t get it. He didn’t understand what was going to come to light. I closed my eyes, hating what I was going to admit. “But, I uh, I have a problem with—”
“Pills? Yeah, Nicky told me.”
My eyes flew open. “He did what?” That wasn’t his secret to tell. That was mine. It was up to me whether or not to tell my father what was going on in my life. “He had no right to tell you any of this.”
“You wanted to let this asshole walk away without any repercussion so that your mom and I didn’t find out about your pill problem. I think Nick was justified in what he did, baby girl.”
“Dad, I—”
“Should have called me yourself? Should have told me what’s been going on? Should have asked for my help?” He had one eyebrow raised in question. “Any of those close to what you were going to say?”
“No. I wasn’t going to say, I’m finnnnneeee…” I dragged the word out and he said it the same time I did.
“Yeah, I’ve been there.” His face was sad, his eyes filling back up with tears. “Why didn’t you come to me? It’s us against the world, baby girl, you know that.”
I started to sob in his arms. I let it all go and cried until I could barely breathe. Us against the world. That was what we all said; that was how we all lived. But, somewhere along the way, we stopped including our parents in the us part. And they didn’t even realize it. “Daddy, I’m so sorry.” I was heaving, trying to push out my words through my tears. “I’m sorry, I’m so, so…”
“Shhh.” He held me, rocking me back and forth like he had when I was a little girl. “The only thing that matters now is that you’re okay. That you’re safe, and you’re getting help.”
“I am.” I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. “I swear, I am.”
“And. We’ll be pressing charges against the guy who did this to you.” He pushed my hair off my face, his thumb brushing lightly over the bandage on my forehead. “It’s my job to protect you, Evie. Not the other way around.” He dipped down, staring directly into my eyes. “I love you, and there is absolutely nothing that you could ever do to make me stop loving you. Understand?” I nodded. “Good.”
“You’re awake.” Nicky walked in, a large duffel bag in his hand. “How are you feeling?” His gazed moved from my dad, then back to me. His eyes were wary, like he was waiting to see if he should duck to avoid my wrath.
“I feel really, really well actually.” I held my hand out, smiling when he was instantly at my side. “When I’m all the way better, we’re going to get into an argument about boundaries and communication. But, for now, I’m good.”
He kissed the inside of my wrist, putting my palm on his face. “I love you, little bird, so damn much.”
“He calls you little bird?” My dad was standing, his arms crossed over his chest and looking intimidating as hell. “Seriously?”
I nodded. “He does.”
My dad’s hard expression softened into a grin. “He’ll fit in fine with our group then, won’t he?”
“He will.”
***
I’d been discharged after lunch, the only stipulation being that I have someone with me at all times for the next three days. I had a concussion and another fall would put me right back into the hospital.
I was curled up on Nicky’s couch. Ollie was basically lying in my lap and so was Nick. My dad was sitting one of the two chairs opposite us. He was on his phone, his thumbs flying, when there was a knock on the door.
“I’ll get it, it’s probably Mayk or Bleu.” I smiled as Nicky hopped up, loving this new little unit we’d seemed to form. I’d woken up at one point in the hospital snuggled against Bleu’s vintage Nine Inch Nails shirt. I’d looked at him and he’d looked at me, he’d shrugged and I’d simply gone back to sleep. “Uh, Evie? Your mom is here?”
I jerked my head around, shooting my dad a what the hell glare. He held his hands up, his eyes wide. He was as surprised as I was.
“The two of you better start talking because I am very close to losing my shit.” My beautiful and always put-together mom was now standing in my boyfriend’s living room, her hands on her hips.
“Cher, we—”
“No.” She pointed her finger at my dad. “I’ll deal with you later.” She turned to me. “Why is there a bandage on your head? Why are you two keeping me out of whatever is going on? What happened?” Her voice cracked on her last question. She wasn’t mad, she was worried.
“I, uh, my ex-boyfriend tried to rape me.” I let everything out in a rush, my words running together.
My mom’s face crumbled and she immediately started to cry. She came to sit next to me, pulling me into her arms. “Baby girl, are you okay? Let me see your head. Are you hurt anywhere else?” Through her onslaught of tears she was checking my stitches, inspecting my arms. She noticed the bruises on my neck and fresh tears spilled over.
“Nick, why don’t you and I go grab some dinner?” My dad got up, his voice thick with emotion. He kissed the top of my head, and then took my mom’s hand and asked her to walk him to the door.
“I won’t be gone long, little bird.” Nicky lifted my chin with his finger, kissing my lips in a way that would have been slightly inappropriate had my parents still been in the room.
My mom came back in and sat next to me, taking my hands in hers. “Start talking, baby girl, please.”
“It’s kind of a really long, messed-up story, Mom.” She was already a crying mess, what was going to happen when she heard the rest of my tale?
“Please let me in, Evie. No matter what it is, I want to know.”
“Okay…” I drew out the word as I shifted on the couch, getting comfortable. “I got addicted to Adderall and painkillers. The Adderall was prescribed, but I took much more than I was allotted. The pain pills helped me calm down enough to sleep.” I wondered if any of this felt like déjà vu for Dylan James? She’d known my dad before he kicked the drug habit and the partying. I’d read a few articles that had pointed to as much.
“I only started dating Collin, my ex, because he could easily supplement my pills when I ran out. And I always ran out. He was never a nice guy. At first it was kind of fun though. We were so toxic, but my whole life was toxic. After I reconnected with Nick, I started to see exactly how far I’d fallen.” I smiled—simply thinking about him made me happy. “I knew Nick before the pills and the parties. I met Nicky when I was nothing but a quiet bookworm who missed her parents.”
“He helped you? Nick? This is his apartment?” She looked around the loft, like she was searching for her own answers.
“Yeah, he brought me here and he helped me detox a little. He took me to a doctor that is helping me wean off the Adderall, and together we found a therapist to help me cope with the addictions.” And the life I was leading, and now, the fact that my ex had drugged and attempted to rape me.
“When did the attack happen? Why was your dad contacted and not me?”
“Last night.” I scoffed lightly. “I can’t believe it was only last night, it feels like weeks have gone by.” I took a sip of water from the hospital jug I’d brought home with me. “I went to the officers’ dinner for our chapters. I felt like it was important that I face some demons, you know? I told Collin, my ex, that we were done. He took it much better than I thought he would, which in hindsight should have been my first clue something was off. He asked me to stay until after his speech was over, and then he’d have his driver take me home.” I wiped at my face when I felt tears falling down my cheek. I hadn’t realized I’d started to cry. “He drugged me, but at the time I thought I was ill. I went into the bathroom, and started to throw up. He came up behind me…Nicky stopped him, he got there in time, and he pulled him off me.”
If it weren’t for Nick I’d have been raped, by someone I’d once trusted, while I was bending over a toilet throwing up.
Nick had saved my life, over and over again.
He was everything to me, he was my calm in the storm.
My sanctuary.
“Baby girl, I’m so sorry.” My mom hugged me tight, whispering over and over how sorry she was that this happened to me. That I had to go through such a terrible experience. How she was here for me.
I pulled back, trying to put a reassuring smile on my face. “I’m going to be okay, Mom, I promise.” I took a deep breath. “I won’t let him win. I won’t let him ruin all the progress I’ve made. I won’t let him ruin my happiness with Nicky.”
“You are so strong, Evie. So wonderfully strong.” She cupped my cheek in her warm hand. “Why didn’t you call me?”
“I didn’t call Dad, Nicky did.” Nick. The believer in all things truthful and honest. “I told him I didn’t want to press charges on Collin because I didn’t want you guys to see how messed up I’d become.”
“Oh, Evie.” My mom shook her head. “That’s ridiculous, you know that. We love you girls, no matter what.” Which was pretty close to what my dad had said as well.
“We don’t like to disappoint you guys. Or make you worry. It’s always been easier to deal with things on our own and—”
“What’s that now? We?”
I felt like in the love and heat of the moment I’d started to overshare. I went beyond this one incident, and beyond myself. “Well, like a general we. Emmie hates to upset you guys too.” Sorry Ems, but it’s easier to throw your C term paper under the bus than Crue and Avory’s secret two-year love affair.
My mom wagged her finger in my face. “No more, okay? No more hiding things from us or trying to spare our feelings. We’re your parents. We love you. It’s our job to help you fight your battles. No matter how big or how small.” She pulled me in for another hug. “It’s us against the world, baby girl.”
I really needed to call Beau. I needed to tell him he’d been right when he’d come home. Keeping all the ’rents in the dark wasn’t okay. They thought they’d raised us right. They were secure in the fact that if there was an issue we’d tell them.
They trusted us, and they really shouldn’t have.