Before I even get out of my car, Chase is opening my door. “Sam was here,” he says, taking my hand.

“I know, he ran into me downtown when I was meeting up with Seth.”

“I told him Seth was your boyfriend.”

“Why would you do that? You know he and I are only friends.” I shut the car door.

“I thought it might run him off, but it didn’t.”

“No, it didn’t. Please tell me Tenny didn’t see him.” We head for the house.

“She saw him. He came to the back of the house when we were both outside.”

I open the front door and Tenny comes running out as soon as she sees me. “Emma, Sam was here and Chase made him leave.” She scowls and points her finger at Chase.

“Chase was only trying to protect you and me.” I push her finger down.

“But he came for us, like I knew he would.” She wraps one arm around my hip.

I pick her up and sit on the couch with her. “You and I have a good life here now and Sam is not a part of that any more. I know it’s hard for you to understand.”

“I understand enough. You love Sam and he loves you. He made you so happy and I know you don’t look at Mr. Seth the way you looked at Sam.” Her round eyes are big and serious. If only it were that simple.

“Look, Sam left us…”

“He said he was sorry. You always told me that I had to forgive people when they say they are sorry and mean it.”

I look up at Chase and he shrugs his shoulders. “Yes, that is true, but this is different.”

“How is it different?”

“It just is, Tenny. I don’t want to argue with you about this. It’s been a really long day and I’d like to relax for a little bit.” I don’t give her time to say anything else. I throw my purse on the counter, pulling out the journal and heading to my room. As I turn to the closet to put my shoes away, a burst of rage clouds my head and I throw them against the closet door. How dare he just show up here! I’ve finally gotten my life together. I have a great future in designing. I’ve saved enough money to buy a house. Tenny is happy here. I have my best friend and someone else who likes me. I know Seth wants more, but I don’t. I plop down on my bed. I don’t because… I still want Sam. I beat my fists on the bed underneath me. “Damn you Sam!” I yell at the top of my lungs. I’m surprised Chase doesn’t come running into my room to investigate. He’s probably too scared.

I want to shut my eyes and forget about my day, but instead I pick up Sam’s journal and start reading. He wrote about his day every day. I can feel the pain he is going through - not only his physical pain but the mental pain as well. At the close of every page, he professes his love to me and tells me how sorry he is.

As I read on, I can tell he’s changing as the days go by. I start to read about a confident man, not someone feeling sorry for himself. He’s the man I remember. I’m seeing Sam again. I see his heart, the man who gave up so much for me. As I keep reading I feel his strength and courage to move forward. More importantly, I feel his love for me. Can I really forgive him?

A soft knock raps on my door. “Come in.”

Chase is waving a white towel in surrender. He throws it down when he sees me crying. He sits down beside me and picks up the journal. “What are you going to do?”

I cover my eyes with the palms of my hands. “I don’t know.”

“Do you still love him?” He pulls my hands down from my face so that he can look me in the eyes.

“Would you be angry if I said yes?” I whisper

He lays down beside me. “I hate that he broke your heart, but I love what he gave you.”

“Me, too. I don’t agree with what he did, but I understand it now.”

“Do you understand it enough to give him another chance?”

“I honestly don’t know.”

* * *

Tenny and I perform our nighttime routine, with her falling asleep after I read a couple of books to her. I turn off her light but before I shut her door I hear her say, “I miss Sam.”

I walk back over to her bed and kiss the top of her head. “I miss him, too.”

Sleep won’t come. My mind keeps going to Sam and it won’t shut off. When the clock hits 2 A.M. I finally give up, putting on my clothes and stealthily making my way through the sleeping house. I slip into my car and drive into town to find the hotel that Sam said he was staying at.

There is one person working the desk at the hotel. “Can you tell me which room Sam Sawyer is in?”

“Are you Emma Flinn?” The question throws me. “Um…yes.”

“Mr. Sawyer instructed me to give you a key when you showed up.” He slides the key across the counter.

I straighten my spine a little. “Did he now?” I’m tempted to turn around and walk out, but my heart starts beating faster as I grasp the key in my hand. I decide to take the flight of stairs three floors up rather than the elevator, hoping to relieve some of my anxiety with the exercise. I stop in front of his door, tempted to knock, but instead I insert the key. The green light flashes to open it. The room is dark. I feel along the wall for a light, but before I can find one a lamp comes on. Sam is sitting in a recliner with his feet up, eyes red and swollen from crying.

I move further into the room and lay my bag down. He lowers the recliner and places his feet on the ground. “I thought you weren’t coming,” his voice cracks.

I sit across from him in a high-back chair. “I thought I wasn’t coming either, until I read your journal.”

He gets up and kneels in front of me. “I love you, Emma. I will do anything to make this right. I don’t want to live another day without you in it.”

I wipe the tear that threatens to fall from his eye. “I’m willing to try.” I close my eyes and touch his face. I want to see the old Sam. “Please be the same Sam when I open my eyes,” I whisper. When I open my eyes, he is still staring at me with water-filled eyes. He leans in and kisses me tenderly. My body aches for him and I want to get lost in him, but I stop myself. “I think we need to take this slow,” I whisper.

“We can take it as slow as you want.”

“I’m going to go back home and tomorrow, you will call me for a date. A proper date.” I stand up and he stands with me.

“I’ll walk you to your car and I will call you tomorrow.” He hands me his phone and I program my number into it. He reaches for his cane and walks me down, just like he promised.

* * *

Sam called the next day and I agreed to a date on Friday night. I know it was mean to make him wait, and I really wanted to see him sooner, but I wanted to see how long he would wait for me. He’s taking me to some swanky restaurant in Town Square in downtown New York City. I pick out one of my designer dresses to wear with a pair of black shiny heels.

When he pulls into the driveway, it feels like it’s our first date. He’s in a fetching black suit with his tie untied around his neck. He greets me with a kiss. My hands touch his biceps, barely contained in his jacket. They are bigger and firmer than I remember. He’s clean-shaven and his long hair is tied in a sexy man bun.

“You look stunning.” He twirls his finger in the air for me to turn around. I oblige and hear him inhale when he sees the low cut of my black dress.

“I’m not sure how slow I can go with you in that dress,” he says with a husky tone to his voice.

“You, mister, will have to behave.” I don’t dare tell him I feel the same way about him in that suit. I reach up and fix his tie.

He gives me a quick kiss. “Thank you.” He opens the door for me and I climb into the passenger side.

When he’s in and backing out, I ask him, “Where exactly are we going?”

“I scored tickets to Wicked.”

“Seriously? I’ve been trying to get tickets for months.” I’m so excited.

“I got lucky, I guess.” He winks at me.

* * *

“That was the best play I’ve ever seen,” I snuggle into the warmth of his elbow. “I used to go to all the plays at the Ice House Theater in Mt. Dora. I loved their production of Wicked, but it was nothing compared to seeing it on Broadway. Thank you so much for taking me.”

“It was all my pleasure.”

We walk arm and arm through the city that still buzzes with people at this late hour, talking as if we were never apart. I tell him all about my internship. He tells me all about his company and his plans for the future. He says his company can be based out of anywhere in the country.

We walk and talk until coming to a dimly-lit bridge. He turns me in his arms and kisses me deeply for the first time. I return his kiss with the same passion he is feeling. I know I said I want to go slow, but my body doesn’t agree with me. I want to feel him in my arms again.

I pull away, breathless. “Can we go back to your hotel room?” I ask him.

“Are you sure? Because if we do, I will never let you out of my arms again.”

“I’m positive.” I kiss him this time.

Neither one of us wants to part our lips from one another. We finally pull apart and wrap our arms around each other, walking back. A car door slams shut in the dark road next to us and a shadow moves our direction.

“I knew one day I would find you together.” It’s a familiar voice.

“I thought you were in jail,” I say, scared out of my mind.

Ben takes another step closer, moving into a faint circle of light cast by a street lamp. He’s aged and lost weight, but I recognize him. His eyes are bloodshot and he has a permanent crease in his brow. He lifts his hand and points a shaky gun at us. “I got off on a technicality,” he says, his voice full of hatred.

Sam pushes me behind him. “What do you want?”

“I want both of you dead. That’s what I want. Too bad that little brat of yours isn’t with you. I’ll go after her next.” He points the gun directly at Sam.

“You stay away from him!” I scream.

“You will never get away with it. They will know it was you that killed us,” Sam says.

He steps closer. “I will be long gone before they figure it out. I want to kill you first, like I should have done years ago.”

Sam shoves me behind him, almost knocking me over to get me out of the way of the gun. I feel him take a step forward and then I hear the gun fire. My life stands still.