Serena
Surprisingly, I woke without a headache. After last night’s events, I’d fully expected one. Like a coward, I’d run to my room and shut off the light, but I still heard him enter the house. Shane paused at my door as if he wanted to knock but didn’t. It took everything in my power not to open the door and throw myself at him. Those moments we had on the swing and near the car were more intimate than the kisses we’d shared.
The kisses were about passion, desire, and lust. The other moments were about feelings. They were about Shane and me, where the outside world didn’t exist. Feelings I didn’t need or want—nor had ever felt before, for that matter. He made me desire him like I hadn’t anyone else, and it confused me. I didn’t want anyone to have that kind of power over me.
Done with the morning routine, I passed by Maggie’s room to make sure she was all right. Knocking on the door, I patiently waited for answer, but silence greeted me from the other side of the door. Deciding maybe she needed help, I was about to burst inside when it opened.
None other than Grady stood before me, shirtless, with his tanned chest and evident six-pack. I had no attraction to him or anything—that was all for Shane—but I could admire. He leaned on the doorjamb with his shoulder, raising his brow at me.
“Yeah?” Just like that, he acted as if it was completely normal he was there. I thought he asked to stay in the barn, but then he and Shane had a conversation, and I didn’t know how that went. When I thought about it, he probably intentionally made me go inside so they could sort their things out together.
Men.
“I wanted to check on Maggie.”
“She’s fine.”
I didn’t really care for his tone. “Yeah? Well, I want to see for myself.”
He looked at me for a while and then smiled, clearly amused with something. He stepped back, making space for me to move inside the room. I saw Maggie lying in bed. She was under the covers, but she had her clothes on from last night. Just her glasses, shoes, and bun were removed. I didn’t know she had such long, beautiful hair, but then it was hard to know anything about her looks, since she covered them so much. She didn’t look ill or anything, but she hadn't woken up yet.
My eyes traveled to Grady with his shirt and shoes on, holding his jacket in one hand. “You’re leaving?” It seemed a bit odd to me, because Maggie was still asleep.
“Yeah, there is some work to do on the ranch and then at the bar. She’ll be out for several more hours. She’ll need your help once she wakes up. You’ll help her, right?”
“Of course!”
“Good.” He went to Maggie, touching her cheek with his palm so gently I felt almost like an intruder watching it. Then his face lost the soft look, and he turned to the doorway.
“Um….” I didn’t really know what he would want me to tell Maggie. In her state, no way would she know he was here.
“She’ll know. Bye, beautiful.” With those last words, he exited the room, leaving me standing there confused. I knew for a fact he’d called Maggie beautiful and not me.
After everyone was done with breakfast and I cleaned up, I decided to talk with Dad and Becky. Maggie was still asleep. Ren came home sometime in the morning and just shut his door, which in his language meant fuck off. And Shane, well, Carter made romance hard as he loaded Shane with tons of work.
In my room, I locked the door, sat on the bed, and took out my cell, deciding to talk to my dad first. If I was upset with him, Becky would cheer me up, or so I hoped.
He answered on the third ring, and by the echo in the background, I figured he was by the pool, probably at the beach house where he usually went.
“Serena!” Well, at least he sounded happy to hear from me.
“Hey, Dad.”
“How are things going?”
“Not bad.”
“Good. How is your collection going?” he asked.
Wasn’t that the million-dollar question? The truth was I didn’t feel inspired to draw clothes at all. All I wanted to do was draw the horses, the ranch, and Shane. He was certainly the object of my fascination, and I wanted to buy paints and pastels, because pencils weren’t doing it. But I couldn’t tell Dad that, because I knew what was at stake.
My future, the one I wanted, not my old dream, something that was long forgotten.
“Yeah, Dad, moving forward with it.”
“Great. And the ranch?”
“It’s okay. Hawk is still not here though.” That was all the story I was going to give. I highly doubted my dad was interested in any drama that was present here.
“Yeah, he has had a rather rough patch with Elizabeth.” Dad’s voice was worried, and I was curious. No one ever discussed Hawk or his wife. All I knew from pictures and short conversations was they were a great couple who fell in love young and were living the dream because she left her wealthy family to live with a Native American while everyone was opposed to that decision.
“Baby girl, I’m happy you’re not upset like you used to be.”
Frowning, I couldn’t grasp what he meant. Something was off. “Umm, Dad, why would I be upset?”
“Because of today.”
“What exactly happened today?”
He was silent for several seconds, and then he exhaled a heavy breath. When he spoke, his voice was edgy and slightly husky, as though it was hard for him to speak. “Honey, today is the tenth of July.”
I froze on the bed, afraid to move or say anything.
The tenth of July was the date I hated the most.
On that day, a beautiful woman died. She may have lost all her hair, she was skinnier and only a shell of what she once was, but she was still beautiful. Her kind eyes still had laughter and warmth in them when she looked at me and finally closed her eyes.
She never opened them again. I remember shaking her, screaming for the doctors, and begging her to open them one last time. Her goodbye wasn’t enough; her letter wasn’t enough. I wanted my mom back. Dad had rushed to the room and held me while the doctors covered her up.
“Time of death.” I fought my dad, kicked him, but he didn’t once let me go. Finally, when all the fight was gone from me, I sank to my knees and cried. My beautiful mom was gone, and I didn’t know how to live with that. No, scratch that. I didn’t want to live without her. She was supposed to be there for my graduation, for my wedding, for everything else. She was gone. She’d left me. I was suffocating. The way to move on was by getting rid of everything she loved to do, everything she taught me to be. I saw her in myself, and I couldn’t stand it. I became someone I’d always hated, someone my mom would never have been proud of. As much as I hated being the new me, it helped me deal with the pain and sometimes forget about Mom, as selfish as that sounded.
However, for the last three years, I had always remembered the tenth of July.
I never forgot. The day that forever separated my life to before and after. I hung up the phone as Dad was saying something, but I didn’t care. I knew I should, but I couldn’t.
She was my best friend. She was always my safe haven. I didn’t know how to live in my world when she wasn’t there.
So I created a new one.
“I’m sorry, Mommy. I’m so sorry,” I whispered, and ran from the room.
Ran away from myself.
Shane
The day was one fucking, annoying mess. I woke up with a headache, which was no surprise after the previous night. Then I saw Grady leaving that morning. As he informed me, he’d come back. Ren came in late and looked like shit, not to mention smelling like cheap perfume. I wondered how his dick didn’t fall off from all the fucking he did. But the most annoying thing was Carter, who cockblocked me every damn day. As if he had some kind of radar and felt my connection with Serena.
I had to make a note for Hawk on Lightning’s progress. He liked to know what we were up to when he wasn’t around. I didn’t call him, but knew from Carter that he had made no progress with Elizabeth, and I didn’t expect him to. How could Hawk ask his wife’s forgiveness after what he had done?
The back door opened then quickly shut, and Serena was running to the field in the direction of the trees and lake. Glancing back at Carter, I found him watching her too. Concern laced his features, probably mirroring my expression.
“Carter, look after the horses for me, will ya?” I ran after Serena, passing several guys on the way who gave me curious glances. She didn’t go far. I found her sitting by the lake, staring at it. Maybe I was wrong and nothing happened. Maybe she just needed a break, and I was intruding.
But deep in my gut, I sensed something was off.
As I sat down next to her, she didn’t say anything. We were both silent, but then one lonely tear slid down her cheek. She did nothing to hide it or wipe it away.
I leaned forward, taking her chin in my hand, and finally she focused her eyes on me. They were filled with pain, but not the kind that comes with rage, agony, or hatred. It was the kind of pain that was numb. The one that made you question your place in life. The same pain I’d been feeling for the last year.
My lips gently pressed against hers and then traveled to lick the tear away. Sighing, she scooted closer. “Tell me.” Maybe I shouldn’t have asked, but deep down inside, I needed to know what was wrong so I could try to fix it. I’d never felt like that before toward other girls, never felt the need to protect and make everything better for them.
She shook her head and tried to move away, but I didn’t let her as I trapped her in my arms. Serena struggled a bit but then gave up the fight, resting her chin on my shoulder. She put her arms around my neck while mine circled her waist. Not the most comfortable position, but I wanted nothing except to hold her, so it worked for me.
“Don’t want to talk,” she whispered.
“What do you want?” She would get anything she wanted at that moment.
Her breath brushed my ear when she put her lips close and whispered, “To forget.” That wasn’t something we were supposed to do while she was upset, vulnerable, and trying to get away from her demons. I wouldn’t take advantage of her. What I could give her was comfort.
“Okay, princess,” I said softly, and before I knew it, she put her mouth on mine, but the kiss was nothing like before. The kiss was sloppy, teeth clashing, while her hands held my head tight like she couldn’t get enough of me. No finesse or experience, we seemed like two kids who’d discovered kissing for the first time. She desperately craved to run away from whatever was hurting her, and for that, she needed control. I would gladly submit myself to her for as long as she wanted.
She pushed at my shoulders, laid me back on the grass, and straddled my thighs. I barely contained a groan when I felt her pussy covered in jean shorts right above my hard-on. The sun shone around her, making her hair appear hot as flames… and her green eyes...
Leaning down, she kissed me again.
At some point, I took back the dominant position and controlled the kiss. She needed to feel wanted and protected, but at the same time, she needed to allow herself to be weak. The pain that consumed her, she wouldn’t let it go.
I hoped to fuck I could help her, because the sight of her tears gutted me from the inside.
Serena
Kissing him was like having medicine that made you forget everything. My body craved more of him, of his body, his presence, his scent. I scooted down a bit lower, which resulted in my core touching his cock. His groan made me smile against his mouth. A thrill of happiness ran through me. I liked to affect him; it made me feel powerful. Sliding my hands under his shirt, I lifted it up to see his amazing abdomen. His glistening-in-the-sun tanned skin with his six-pack was something I didn’t want to resist.
Leaning down, I licked the path from the bottom to the top until I came back to his lips. Our mouths met in a leisurely, slow kiss, with our tongues entwined as our breathing sped up. My hands rested on each side of his head, and without thinking, I started to move on him and rub myself on his erection, which made him groan. His hands squeezed my hips painfully, probably leaving marks, and I felt the shift in power.
In one swift move, he pinned me to the grass, pushed my legs wide, and ended up between them, making me whimper. His mouth traveled down my neck, where he took his time sucking on my flesh as his hands moved under my shirt, softly touching my stomach. My back rose up and then down, making me wince as it hit the rough earth, and Shane growled in displeasure. He pulled me up to straddle his thighs, my legs wrapped behind his back as my arms circled his neck. We separated for a bit as I removed his shirt completely, but then it was back to kissing all over again.
When I finally gulped for air, he moved his lips down my neck in lazy, open-mouthed kisses as I tangled my fingers in his hair, tugging a bit, which earned me another groan. He shifted his hands, and before I knew it, my shirt was removed, too, leaving me sitting in my bra and shorts on his hips.
He skimmed his lips gently to my breast and kissed it, slowly making his way toward my nipple, which was still hidden behind the fabric. He pulled a bit on it and my bra joined our shirts on the grass. He sucked my right nipple into his mouth, while his hand gently cupped it, and I whimpered in need. My head fell back. After he was done with one, he shifted to my left nipple and repeated the actions. I slowly started to rock myself on him, to relieve some of the tension inside, and the hard-on I could feel through his jeans proved he felt the same.
“No.”
I was so into my pleasure that at first I didn’t understand what he’d said. But then all the touching stopped, and we were left breathing heavily as we stared at each other. “Why did you stop?” My voice sounded so needy, but I didn’t care.
“Because it was getting out of hand,” he replied hoarsely, and by the shift of emotions on his face, he was fighting for control.
“And that worries you?”
He looked into my eyes again as though he wanted to see inside me. I had the urge to turn away, but he didn’t let me. He kept hold of my chin so I had no choice but to stay in the same position. “Yes, it does. I won’t be able to stop.” His thumb brushed my chin gently, and I almost moaned. My body was aching and unsatisfied, so his very touch felt like torture.
“I don’t want you to stop.” I knew we didn’t know each other well, and it was probably a mistake, but being with him made my body come alive for the first time in my life. I hadn’t felt like that about any guy, and I didn’t care what someone might say. I wasn’t looking for forever, but for right then, he didn’t seem like the perfect choice; he seemed like the only choice.
Shane groaned into my hair and chuckled. Well, I was glad at least one of us found it amusing.
“I know, beautiful, but we’re five minutes behind the house and out in the open, where everyone can see or hear us. Do you really want the whole ranch to listen to us, or worse, to watch?”
His words had the same effect as if someone threw cold water on my head. I remembered where I was, why I was there, and what made me run away. The ranch, Dad, Mom.
And I was sitting topless on a guy.
Quickly, I tried to lift myself up, but his strong hands on my hips stopped me, and he actually growled when I tried to cover up my breasts.
“Babe, I just had them in my mouth. Don’t you think it’s a bit too late to be modest?”
“That’s not a gentlemanly thing to say, Shane!”
“Well, since I never claimed to be one, it’s a good thing I don’t behave like one.”
“Aren't you hilarious? Let me go. I need to put on my shirt.”
“I’ll help.” He took the bra and helped me put it on, hearing none of my protests when I assured him I didn’t need his assistance. The same happened with the shirt, and then he put his on, all while I was on his lap because he refused to let me go. “Now we talk.”
“Really? What’s there to talk about?”
“You think we can share a moment like that and there would be no conversation?” He sounded almost scandalized, which was quite amusing.
“I don’t know. What do you mean by moment? We just felt like doing it.”
“Babe, patience was never my virtue, so please try not to piss me off, will you?”
“And I never was the obedient one, so I wouldn’t hold my breath if I were you.”
“What happened here today, there will be a continuation.” He sounded so sure and confident, as if there was no doubt sex between us was a done deal.
“What?” I didn’t really understand why we would need to discuss it.
“Tonight, tomorrow, a week. I don’t know when, but it will happen.”
“So sure, huh?” Stupid thing to say, given the fact I almost jumped him twenty minutes ago. Females were entitled to change their minds, so I didn’t feel particularly guilty.
His mouth lifted in a half smile, which earned me his dimple. “I’m sure, because you just made me sure, babe.” Wasn’t that the truth? “That’s not my point though.”
“It’s not?”
“No.” His face changed; his expression shifted from amused to serious. “You’ll have to tell me what’s bothering you.”
“Just not right now,” I whispered, and saw him nod. At least he didn’t push it, which was good. I was in no mood to talk about that.
“And whatever this thing is with us, we will explore it together.” Well shit, here came the talk.
“But—”
His hard stare shut my protest. “We can see where it leads ‘til the end of the summer. Once we get there, we can talk about the future if we want one.” He didn’t even know the truth about me. As sweet as his declaration was, I couldn't help but feel guilty. “My question is… do you accept that?”
Did I? Could I? Should I? All those questions were moot the minute my eyes clashed with his, because I realized with crystal clarity I wouldn't be able to let go.
“Yes.” My voice was confident and sure.
Relief washed through his eyes, and he tried to kiss me, but I stopped him. We needed to discuss one more thing. “I want us to be exclusive.” Well, I said it. I didn’t know what his reaction would be, but I wasn’t sharing with anyone.
His mouth widened in a soft grin. “As if I would want to share you. It’s a deal.”
Satisfied with his answer, we collided in one more kiss before he finally lifted me up and we headed back to the ranch. “Do we have to hide it from the others?” I didn’t know what the rules were on the ranch about a private life, mainly because I didn’t see any of the guys with females.
Then there was Maggie. And even though she didn’t have eyes on Shane as I originally thought, it didn’t mean she would be pleased with the whole sex thing.
“Fuck no. You are mine, and every man better know that.” His possessiveness made my insides tingle, everything female in me answering his primal words.
Once we were back at the house, the time on the clock made it clear I still had several hours of cleaning and cooking to do. My lips met his for a brief second, and then I darted toward the stairs. “I’ll go check on Maggie.”
He grabbed a slice of corn bread from the table, and blew me a kiss. “I’ll go back to work and see you later. If there is anything she needs, let me know.” He left, and I went upstairs feeling all giddy inside.