Lying in bed, I try my best to not dwell on Brady’s news, but it’s not working. I don’t like anyone—especially Calhoun Ryder—thinking they can take advantage of me. Pulling the emotional card with me was a low blow. He knew I’d react with kindness when he mentioned claiming his father’s body. That asshole remembered how I was once in his shoes, and he used that moment against me. That moron just moved to the top of my personal shit list.
It’s been twelve years, but the mental reject isn’t giving up. At some point in life, Calhoun determined that we should be a couple. He’s always tried to sweet talk his way into my good graces. It’s why he almost got away with that story. I just don’t understand it. It’s the whole reason for this war—the Ryders’ dislike for the Romeros combined with Calhoun’s stupid notion he should be my boyfriend.
Dumb ass.
Downstairs the front door opens and closes, but I’m not worried. Brady’s scent mixed with something darker and troublesome drifts into the room. Before I can get out of bed, he’s in the doorway smiling. His casual appearance—faded jeans, a T-shirt, and sneakers—aren’t fooling me. Brady’s concern is so intense it wafts off him like a cheap fragrance.
“Hey, sugar,” he murmurs.
“Hey, yourself.” My gaze rakes over him, searching for a sign of his discomfort. “Everything okay?”
“It will be.”
I slide over and pat the mattress. “If you’re going to be here, then we should call off this stupid-ass charade. Get back to being about us.”
Brady yanks off his shirt before pulling the covers back and slipping in beside me. “Agreed.”
Now that’s a surprise. “You agree with me?”
“Yeah. I can’t protect you if I’m not here twenty-four seven.”
My wolf doesn’t react, but I do. Protection? That’s the last damned thing I need. Jumping up, I toss a heated gaze in his direction and then begin pacing the floor. “How many times do I have to tell you I don’t need protection? Have you forgotten what I am?”
He stares at me for a moment. “No, I haven’t. But what are you going to do if Calhoun comes after you? He doesn’t care that you’re a wolf or an alpha.”
My feet freeze. “Are you saying that my wolf isn’t strong enough?”
A pained look crosses his face. “Audra, you are stronger than most females I know, but you’re no match against a Ryder cat. They don’t play fair.”
Dragging my hand through my hair, I state what should be obvious. “Neither do I.”
Brady exhales loudly. He sits up, draws his legs in, and places his elbows on his knees. “I’m not here to fight with you. Audra, you will accept my protection.”
“Or what?” My hands go to my hips. “Are you going to tie me up?”
“As tempting as that is, I won’t.” His brow furrows, and he speaks in a steady, firm tone. “I’ll station my pack around this house and create a fortress. You’ll be followed every hour of the day. Hell, you won’t even be able to go to the bathroom without a wolf trailing you.”
Narrowing my eyes, I bare my teeth. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Try me.” He rises to his feet and slinks over to me. Placing his hands on either side of my face, Brady stares into my eyes. “Don’t you understand that I’ll do whatever it takes to protect you? You are everything to me. Sugar, I love you too much to risk what we have. If I lose you, they might as well bury me alongside of you because my life won’t be worth a damn. Hate me for now if you must, but I’m not backing down.”
This male has always been able to say the right words. The ones that make me want to jump his bones and love him until we’re moving as one. But shadowing me twenty-four seven? There are no elegant words to make that bullshit go down easy. I plead, “Brady.”
Brushing his thumbs over my cheeks he says, “Don’t fight me on this. It’s what’s best for you.”
Reaching up, I grasp his wrists. “No. I won’t live like this.”
Brady rests his forehead against mine. “Then accept the bond. I’ll be able to keep up with you then, and I won’t have to worry.”
“No. I won’t be forced into it. The bond can’t be some ultimatum, Brady. I have to make the commitment freely in my time. Not yours. Not Cal’s. But mine. Understand?”
“What I understand”—Brady steps back— “is that you’re the most stubborn she-wolf I’ve ever met.” He grabs his shirt and a pillow off the bed. “I’ll be downstairs. If you change your mind, you know what to do.”
I watch the only wolf I’ll ever love walk out the room. Why can’t he understand how hard this is on me? Honestly, I have no problem with the bond or marrying him. I just want it to be my decision. Every time Brady has popped the question, it’s either been about the pack or about his family.
Or your safety.
I don’t doubt his love for me. Nothing else should enter the equation—not obligations, not protection, not even tradition. Only love.
I swear I’m sick to death of all of this. At what point do I get to have a fucking breakdown? A screaming, leave-me-the-hell-alone temper tantrum? I’m tired of everyone trying to control me.
Instead of sleeping, though, I spend the night staring at the ceiling. I consider everything Brady said…and didn’t say. He loves me. I’ve never doubted it for a minute. It’s the reason why I’m considering stepping down. Allowing him to protect me is minor in the grand scheme of things. Unfortunately, my wolf is one stubborn mistress. She doesn’t give in easily.
When the first rays of sunlight kiss the deep blue sky, I trudge into the shower. It’s too early, but I’m tired of pretending to sleep. Brady’s words, however, follow me into what’s normally my sanctuary. Standing under the shower, I hear his voice in my head, begging me to just give in.
I know I’m being unreasonable, but I can’t help it. If I bond with Brady because of a threat, what else will I do? Give up my freedom, the pack, or my life because of what someone else wants?
Didn’t you say that you’re making plans to step away? How is Brady’s request different?
I’m not ready to be an alpha’s wife. That’s the bottom line. I need everyone to consider my needs for a change.
Opening the shower door, I find Brady leaning against the sink with his arms folded over his chest. He reaches for a towel and holds it out for me.
“Morning, sugar.” There isn’t a smile on his handsome face.
My eyes rake over his button-down shirt and jeans. “How long have you been up?”
Brady shrugs. “I’m not sure. I’ve been taking care of Romero Enterprises business. There’s a pot of coffee downstairs, and I just put danishes in the oven.”
Mmm…that sounds good. My wolf, however, won’t let me accept the peace offering. She’s still heated from last night. Reluctantly, I allow him to wrap the towel around me. “Is this how we’re doing things now?”
He shrugs again. “I told you last night I’m not leaving. If I do, I call in my pack. Choice is yours, sugar.”
No way am I going to allow another wolf to see me naked. I’m not a prude or anything. I just believe that subordinates shouldn’t see their alpha in the nude unless they’re on a hunt.
Choice is yours.
Brady or a pack member?
“Fine, I’ll accept your protection.” I step out of his embrace. “But I’m not living like some damned prisoner.”
“I don’t expect you to.” He inhales deeply through his nose and then exhales loudly. “Do whatever you need to do each day. If you go some place other than the bar, I’ll go with you. I’ll be back at Balls Up, putting in my time. At the end of the day, we come home. Together.”
Cocking my head to one side, I ask, “For how long?”
Brady places his hands on my shoulders and meets my gaze. “It all depends on you, sugar. If you’ll accept the bond, then this ends. I’m willing to commit to it right now. Then, you can do whatever you need without me shadowing you. If you don’t accept it, then I’m at your side until we put an end to the Ryders.”
Moving away from Brady, I say, “Then I suggest we step up our efforts to get rid of Cal and Drew as soon as possible.”
Brady’s laughter follows me into the bedroom.
Ass.
A delightful, sexy, going-to-be-all-up-in-my-business ass.
We’ve kept our distance all morning. He claimed to have more Romero Enterprises business to tend to while I prepared to head to the bar. I’m tired as all get out, and my stomach is upset, but I have to leave. As soon as I grab my car keys, Brady is at my side. I guess trailing me everywhere wasn’t a joke. Instead of arguing, I let him come with me.
Big problem though. I forgot to tell him about the lunch crowd. He assumed I was going in to do inventory. His eyebrows knit together when the front door opens at eleven o’clock and employees start filing in.
“Audra?” Brady looks up from the computer screen in the office. “Why are the employees coming in so early?”
Tossing my hair off my shoulder, I sneer at him. “Balls Up is open for lunch.”
“How long?”
“Not long. You should have paid more attention to what’s going on in town.”
I swear the Romeros have a habit of sealing themselves off on their property and staying oblivious to events. It’s been an issue between Brady and me. He’d be lost if he didn’t have me keeping him informed, but this time I’m not sorry for keeping him in the dark. I smile to myself as I sashay out of the room. Serves him right for trying to control me.
After the crowd dies down, Brady comes out of the office. He grabs a broom and starts sweeping up around the tables. His lips press together as he casts a look in my direction. Okay. Maybe it’s time to concede.
A little.
Walking toward him, I say, “Brady.”
“Yeah?” His eyes stay focused on the floor.
“Baby, I’m sorry.” I place my hand on the broom handle. “I forgot to tell you about the new schedule. You do remember you gave me the bar? I didn’t think I had to check in with you.”
“I’m not upset about that.” He moves away from me and continues sweeping. “I’m surprised you did it, but I’m not angry with you, sugar.”
It’s the bond. Every single conversation we have ends up being about the damned thing. “I told you that you can protect me.”
His head lifts. “You’ll accept the bond?”
“Not yet. Not like this.” I’m not budging on this one. “It should be done as an expression of love, not some desperate act between us.”
Darkness fills Brady’s eyes. “Is that what you’re thinking? That I’m desperate?”
Oh, hell. I’ve managed to say the wrong words. Again. Another reason I’m tired of talking about marriage and bonds and shit. Our relationship is losing its fun quality. That’s not good.
Then commit to the bond. Once it’s done, you won’t have to discuss it, and life will be good again.
Taking the broom out of his hands, I lean it against a table and face him. “No, baby. I’ve never thought you were desperate.”
Agitation and confusion sound in his voice. “Then what?”
Give an inch. It’ll help.
“Brady, I love you. I’ve asked you for time, and you’ve tried to give it to me.” I caress his cheek. “Let’s end this shit with the Ryders first. After it’s over, I’ll gladly bond and marry you. No more stalling.”
A small smile slides onto Brady’s face. “Seriously?”
“Yes.” A nugget of calm slides beneath my skin. Planning for something happy is long overdue. “I promise.”
He throws a fist in the air, and the grin grows on his face. “About fucking time!”
His reaction gets a chuckle from me. I love it when I make Brady happy.
He wraps his arms around me. “Okay. No more pressure from me. Will you at least wear my ring?”
“No. It’s too soon. We have to own up to the charade we’ve started. No one will believe we were ever broken up if we’re engaged right away.” Brady starts to speak, but I place my finger on his lips. “There won’t be a need for an engagement. We’ll get married right after they shovel dirt in Cal’s and Drew’s faces.”
Brady glances down at me. “Sugar, is that how you see this ending?”
“Yes. It’s the only way we’re going to have peace.” Unfortunately, the Ryders aren’t very bright, and they’re determined to have revenge for acts they committed. If we let them live after this predicament is over, the brothers will be upset over something else. “As long as those two cats stay alive, we’ll always be at war.”
“Okay.” He kisses my forehead. “I’ll meet with Ace later today. We need to discuss how this is going to happen. As long as it’s a clean kill, Council won’t react.”
I ignore the irony in that statement. Cleanliness has never been associated with any of the Ryders.
Sarah drops by Balls Up before the evening rush. Thankfully, Brady permits me some alone time with her. I’m not keeping secrets, but he doesn’t have to know my every move. I close the door to the office as the older pack member takes a seat near my desk.
“Any progress with the beta situation, Sarah?”
She nods. “The heads of the families are ready to meet with you.”
With Brady playing watchdog, meeting with them might prove difficult. “Do you think you could get them to come to the bar? We have a room downstairs. If anyone asks, we can simply say it’s a pack meeting.”
“Of course. They can meet in two days.”
I lean back in my chair. “You said they were ready. Why the delay?”
“A few of them are out of town on business, but they promise to be back by then.” Sarah pats my hand. “Is everything okay with you, Audra? I noticed Brady behind the counter.”
Performance time.
Sighing deeply, I say, “Yes, it is. Brady and I are going to try again.”
“That’s good to hear.” Sarah offers me a small smile. “Do you mind my asking what caused the rift between you two?”
“Just a simple argument,” I lie.
“My dear, there’s no such thing as a simple argument. They always stem from something serious. Something you shouldn’t ignore.”
“Trust me, this one was simple. We decided to take a break and think through some stuff. Now we’re going to take things a little slower.”
A hearty laugh comes from Sarah. “Honey, if you two take things any slower, you’re going to be my age before you tie the knot.” She stands up. “I have every confidence that you’ll figure it out. Maybe if you just say yes to his proposal…”
“And?”
“Nature will take its course. Ever think you’re making this more difficult than it has to be?” She places a hand on my shoulder and gives it a squeeze. “I’ll let you know when’s a good time for the meeting.”
Sarah ambles out the door as Brady comes in. They exchange a quick greeting in passing.
“Pack business?” he asks me after Sarah is gone.
“Yes. We need to use the room downstairs in a couple of days.”
“Sure, sugar. You know you don’t have to ask.” He perches on the side of the desk. “Is there anything I can help you with?”
“No. It’s just some routine stuff I need to go over with a few families.” I shuffle a few papers on the desk. “Oh, I told Sarah that we’re back together. I said we’re taking things slower after an argument tore us apart.”
Brady grins and folds his arms. “Really? What was the argument?”
“I didn’t go into any details.”
“Okay, Audra.” His head bobs up and down. “It’s almost time to open for the evening. Did you want to have dinner before or after?”
“I’m good for a while.” To be honest, I’m still feeling queasy. “Let’s see how the night goes.”
“Okay. I’ll see you out front.”
May the night be free of any more discussion about bonds or marriage, I pray.