Over the next few days, I found my mood to be considerably sour, despite the pleasant weather. The sun felt less intense as we moved deeper into harvest season, but it was still hot. Each swipe of my scythe felt like needles pricking my patience. My eyes were opened in Saberus, and now everything else felt pointless.

Anyone with half a brain could sense that the Gardens were a complete waste of my potential and talents. What use were years of elite tutorage and training if I had to spend it here? We spent our days performing mindless tasks that not only ruined my nails but also made my muscles burn.

Still angry about Pioneer Day, the Walker women spent their days ostracizing me. They casually kicked over my water bucket, I’d find dirt in my lunch, and whenever I walked near, they went silent and sneered at me.

Today, I walked with Tallis towards camp in silence. My muscles hurt from the long day and all this work, plus the angry attitudes from the Walkers was wearing me thin. Spending my days at the Gardens and nights with the Scavengers wasn’t sustainable. Something had to change.

I felt restricted by my punishment in the Gardens. I wanted something better but lacked the time, supplies, and energy.

I rubbed my shoulder and winced, causing Tallis to look over at me. The sun was setting, and I noticed lightning bugs dancing in the distance. “You need to rest, Agapimenos,” he observed with a frown. I could feel his piercing eyes sweep over my appearance with scrutiny. My hair was a frizzy mess, my eyes had black circles under them, and I wore one of my loose-fitting dresses intended for lounging.

“No, I think I need a massage,” I said suggestively in a sleepy tone. Things were still intense between Tallis and I. When we were alone, I liked to push his buttons, see if I could get him to plunge into all the things I shouldn’t want. But when we were in public, he would do the same to me. Lingering touches and stormy eyes that stripped me bare followed me everywhere. We just couldn’t get on the same page.

“Maybe I should quit,” I began with a heavy sigh, my footsteps dragging along the path towards camp. “Tallis, I can’t stop seeing Saberus. My life here now seems so mundane. So pointless.” My voice sounded whiney even to my own ears. What was the point of teaching if my brothers still wanted me in the Gardens? The Scavengers would move to the Schoolhouse, anyway. My efforts felt wasted.

“When you get tired, it’s time to rest, not quit,” Tallis replied while pushing aside a rogue branch and guiding me to camp. "What else is bothering you?" I shuffled behind him while rubbing my eyes, smearing the black charcoal I lined my lids with all over my face.

"The Walker women are still mad at me," I grumbled.

"Why?"

"I took back something that belonged to me," I replied cryptically with a shrug. I felt too embarrassed to explain my little outburst. Tallis was one of the few people on my side, and for some reason, I worried what he would think.

"I feel like you're my only friend these days, Scavenger. Isn't that sad?"

Tallis' eyes flashed with hurt before he masked his expression.

"Sad?"

"I never thought I'd befriend a Scavenger Chief," I replied. Tallis let a small smile break free.

"I always hoped I'd befriend someone just like you," Tallis said in a low tone.

"And who, exactly, is someone like me?" I craved to see myself through his eyes. He stopped for a moment and grabbed my hands.

"Someone stubborn. Smart. Challenging. Compassionate."

I tried to find fault in his words. I waited for the inevitable insult, but there was none. Tallis stared at me, and I felt nothing but the genuine truth of his statement. His shining eyes and handsome face lacked malice, and there was no sign of hate shining in his bright eyes. I realized that against all odds, he didn’t think I was a spoiled waste of space.

“Maybe you don’t know me well enough then, Scavenger,” I countered.

“I know the parts of you that matter.”

We made our way back to camp where my students were waiting. Tallis walked to the front of the group as the Scavengers set up for the night.

“Attention everyone, Mistress Black needs a break tonight. Gordon will lead your lessons.” He grabbed my hand and guided me towards a large tent. I ignored the butterflies that filled my stomach in response to his authoritative tone.

“Tallis, where are you taking me?” I asked with a yawn. I was too tired to argue with him. At this point, I needed rest. He didn’t answer, but instead pulled me through the flap of a tent door and guided me to a pallet covered in furs on the floor. I sat down, and he kneeled at my feet with a smile. He started unlacing my boots.

“Beautiful girl, you need rest. I’ll be back in a little bit to bring you dinner. Nikketa would wring my neck if I didn’t feed you.” He chuckled as he picked up my thin legs and shifted them onto the pallet. I snuggled into the comfortable makeshift bed and breathed in the smoky scent that surrounded me. It was the most comfortable I felt in weeks.

“It smells like you,” I dreamily mumbled before biting my tongue to prevent more ridiculous statements from pouring out of my mouth. My attraction to Tallis amplified in the dim tent.

“That's because it’s my bed, Agapimenos,” Tallis replied in a husky voice with a chuckle. I widened my eyes and fought a blush as he lowered the light on his electric lantern, causing shadows to dance along the tarp walls.

Tallis started walking away when I whispered, “Stay.”

He paused with his hand resting on his thigh, then turned around with a soft smile as he made his way back to me.

“Tell me about the third trial,” I continued as he lowered himself to the floor. I shifted on my side making our eyes level. Only a few inches of space separated us.

“That’s not much of a bedtime story. I don’t want to give you nightmares,” Tallis whispered, and the ghost of his breath made my hair shift against my face.

“I can handle it,” I replied stoically. For some reason, I craved to know the darkest parts of him, I craved to know I wasn’t alone. That we shared tragedy and overcame it.

Tallis took in a deep breath and lifted his hand to my cheek. “Our old Chief was a wise, good man. For decades, he single-handedly ensured our survival. But in his old age, things changed. He became manic. Paranoid. He started talking to the trees. Hearing threats when there weren’t any. He didn’t have my people’s best interest at heart and began hoarding supplies necessary for survival. Our people were dying of starvation, and yet he had stockpiles of food. The only way to overthrow him was to survive the first two trials and then compete in a fight to the death,” Tallis said in a grave tone while stroking my cheek. The dark mood of the story and my tiredness made my resolve disappear, and I craved his contact.

“Our ways are gruesome, but it is our way,” Tallis added in a somber tone. “I did what I had to do, and I outmatched him in many ways. I made my kill swift, painless, and I took no joy in the act. It was in a closed arena, and the only people in attendance were our elder council members and his life partner, Nikketa. Not even Gordon knows that it was me that killed his Grandfather.”

My eyes widened in understanding. Gordon was the old Chief’s grandson.

Tallis continued, watching my face for my reaction to the news. “Our Chief was a proud man. I think he knew his end was coming. As per tradition, we dined together the night before battle. Even then, I remember seeing how his awareness seemed to flicker in and out. In one of his last moments of clarity, he requested that Gordon be told that he died in battle with a neighboring tribe. Since then, I’ve made sure that his wishes were granted.”

“The night he died, Nikketa waltzed into my tent and sobbed in my arms. I—I don’t think I’ll ever forget what she said,” Tallis began while sucking in a deep breath. “She thanked me for ending his suffering, and I remember wishing she would punish me. Hate me for what I did. But instead, she was kind and whispered, ‘Do not fail my people’ before leaving the tent. We never discussed it again.”

His recollection was filled with such emotion that I clutched my chest. I heard the tent flaps shift and something pound against the dirt outside, shaking us out of our intense conversation.

“I don’t know how you do it all,” I whispered as my eyes fluttered shut. Despite his sad story, exhaustion still clung to my senses.

“Same way we all do, Agapimenos. We just do what we can.” Tallis rolled his neck and scratched his forearm before leaning closer. I noticed grey circles under his eyes, too.

“You are such a hypocrite, Scavenger,” I said. Exhaustion made my sloth-like words drip and cling to each syllable.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re tired too.” I wordlessly shifted in the cot, making room for him. Tallis didn’t argue, even though indecision marred his expression. He slipped into bed beside me, and I bravely wrapped my arms around his neck, breathing in his smoky scent. My lips trailed his neck and along his jaw line.

“Agapimenos, you’re killing me,” he moaned out and I smiled against him. “No more,” he added in a strained tone. My fingers traced the delicious V on his lower abdomen as I yawned.

“Why must you be so cruel?” I whined while pulling away and snuggling deeper into the cot.

“I could ask you the same question.” Tallis rolled over so that his muscular back was facing me. I tested my luck and wrapped my arms around his middle.

“I don’t want the world, Jules. I just want you to recognize that there is more here between us than lust and secrets.”

“Ok, so what if I told the world. What if I agreed to a courtship, what then?” I asked. “Would I become a Scavenger? Move here? One day marry you and be a Chief’s wife?”

Tallis turned to face me and smiled, as if envisioning our future together. He didn’t seem concerned by all the obstacles or even doubt that it would work.

“That sounds like a good plan to me,” he said softly while inching closer. “It's not so bad here, is it?”

“No,” I began, trying to visualize what he so easily saw. “I guess it isn’t.”

Tallis kissed me. It was a slow, drawn-out kiss meant to show me all that could be. How could something so new feel so good and make me feel so whole? I snuggled into him, reveling in the feel of him, as I drifted off into a deep sleep.