The long bubble bath, calming candles, and soothing music didn’t clear my mind of Carlos Richmond. So, when my best friend came home, I told her everything. The conversation resulted in us sitting in stunned silence on the couch.

“He was perfect…” I murmured with a shake of my head. “He was perfect for me. Or so I thought.”

Another three minutes of silence descended upon us.

“Wait a minute… this is him?” Meghan asked as she poured over online photos she found on Carlos’s social media pages.

I nodded.

We sat side by side on the couch, but she still dramatically jerked her body forward, turning her head from her phone to me and back to her phone again. “This is your photography partner?!”

I looked over my best friend’s shoulder and eyed the picture of Carlos that was on the small screen. Dressed in a pair of jeans and a plain white shirt, he was casual yet sexy as hell. Whoever took the picture captured the smile that had turned my insides into mush when I saw it for the first time.

“Yep. That’s him,” I sighed.

She let out a sigh of her own. “Wow… He’s sexy.”

“Yep.”

“And you two had a crazy connection?”

“Yep.”

“And there was definitely a moment?”

“Yep.”

“And he’s part of The Lost Boys?”

“Yep.”

She cocked her head to the side as a new picture of Carlos speaking in front of a group of students appeared on her screen. “Is he a teacher?”

“Yep.”

“So, he’s a sexy, educated, creative, passionate man who gave you butterflies and called you beautiful?”

Letting myself slump back into the couch cushion, I closed my eyes. “Yes.”

“Are you sure he’s a Lost Boy?”

“He’s the one they called Los Cabos.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.”

The front door opened, and I barely peeked between my lashes to see my little sister fly into the room. I heard her footsteps stop abruptly.

“What’s wrong?” Alexandria asked, forcing me to open my eyes all the way.

My lips parted, but words never passed them. I shook my head in confusion and disbelief. “Everything and nothing at the exact same time.”

“What?” Her eyes bounced from me to Meghan and back to me again. “So, is anyone going to tell me what’s going on? I’m starting to freak out!”

“You know how your sister always says she’s waiting to feel that magic with someone,” Meghan started before looking at me to see if I was going to speak.

I dramatically closed my eyes and let my head drop in shame, so she continued.

“Well, she felt the magic tonight.”

“With who?” Alex squealed. “Luca Romano!”

“Well, that’s another story.” Meghan bumped my shoulder with hers and laughed. “But while there may have been a mutual attraction with Luca, she felt the magic with this guy.”

“The magic? Oh, damn!”

I opened my eyes in time to see Alex marveling at the physical godliness and model good looks of Carlos Richmond.

Meghan nodded. “Damn is right.”

“The fact that he looks like that was secondary,” I sighed. “What got me was the fact that he had this energy about him. It was peaceful and alluring, strong and comforting, sexy and confident. I was attracted to him even before seeing how attractive he was—does that make sense?”

“Not really,” Alex mumbled, still clicking through the few photos Meghan had found on the internet. “Because anybody with eyes can see that he is attractive. There’s no way you can look at him and not see that he’s sexy.”

Meghan nodded. “Amen to that.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Alex asked. “He didn’t like you back? He has a girlfriend? He’s married? He chews too loud? What could possibly have you acting like this after feeling magic with this man?”

“He’s a Lost Boy,” I answered, feeling confusion wash over me again.

It was such a disappointment. The man I met was intelligent, kind, respectful, passionate, and he didn’t openly objectify me or any other woman that I could tell. He was the opposite of everything I’d heard in that podcast.

“He’s a ‘lost boy’ as in he doesn’t know what he wants to do with his life?” Alex wondered.

“No, he’s a Lost Boy as in he’s one of the assholes who does that dumb ass weekly podcast giving out dumbass advice to dumbasses around town,” I griped.

“He’s a Lost Boy? He…” Alex pointed at the screen. “He’s a Lost Boy?”

“That’s not a boy, that’s a man,” Meghan commented, shaking her head.

I laughed on the inside, but I was still too stunned to laugh out loud.

“How did you end up falling for a Lost Boy?” Alex asked as she made her way across the living room and into the kitchen.

My eyes widened. “I didn’t fall for him,” I said quickly, denying the claim vehemently. “I-I had a mild interest, but clearly, that was a mistake, and the interest subsided.

“Okay…” Alex turned around and looked at me. “It doesn’t sound like the interest subsided.” She lifted her hands and backed her way toward the refrigerator. “But I just walked in. What do I know?”

I narrowed my eyes at my little sister. “Exactly. Why are you here?”

She laughed before taking a sip from the bottle of water she grabbed. “I have a date tomorrow, and I wanted to know if I could borrow something.”

“Of course—”

“From Meghan,” she continued.

Meghan laughed. “What do you need?”

“That red dress with the cut-outs on the sides.” She clasped her hands together in prayer. “Pleaseeeee!”

Meghan took a screen shot of the image on her phone before rising to her feet. “I don’t know, Alex. I love you like you were my own little sister, but that dress is one of a kind.”

“I know! That’s why I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t a special occasion,” Alex replied, a slight tremble in her voice. “Your style is impeccable, and that dress is such a statement piece. I don’t have anything that has the same wow factor. I met this great guy who has a pretty cool first date planned, and I want to wow him. Please.”

My sister knew how to lay it on thick. I’d seen the same tactics work on our parents for twenty-one years, so I knew my best friend was going to relent as they made their way down the hall toward her bedroom.

“Who is this guy and where is he taking you?” Meghan asked before they disappeared from my sight.

My phone vibrated, and I pulled it from my pocket. When I opened the message from Meghan, Carlos Richmond’s photo filled my screen. Even though my stomach twisted, and my body heated with the memory of the way he touched me and held me close, my head hurt, and my heart sank at the memory of the most recent Lost Boys podcast.

Pushing myself off the couch, I felt like I was going to be sick.

“Goodnight!” I yelled as I entered my room, closing the door behind me.

I heard their muffled response as I climbed in bed.

A few minutes passed, and my mind was still racing. I was exhausted, but I couldn’t get Carlos out of my head. It didn’t make any sense that someone who was so captivating and appealing to me was somehow also a supporter of misogyny and fuckboy-ish ways.

“Akila?” Alex called out as she lightly rapped on my door. “Kiki?”

“It’s open,” I replied, turning on my side as I pulled my sheets up to my chin. “What’s up?”

Alex cocked her head to the side and stared at me. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just tired.” I eyed the garment bag in her hand. “I see Meghan gave in to your pleas.”

She smiled. “I love her. She’s the nice big sister. You’re the grump.”

I let out a short chuckle.

Her lips spread wider into a grin. “There’s that smile. Are you still thinking about Carlos?”

“No,” I lied, not wanting to get into it.

“You’re a horrible liar.” She took a step into my room and leaned against the wall. “But I have a question for you… you had no idea when you met him and talked to him that he was a Lost Boy, right?”

I shook my head against the satin pillowcase. “I honestly had no idea.”

“So, if the man you met was essentially the perfect guy for you—”

“I never said that!”

“Meghan said it.” She paused. “And your reaction said it.”

I rolled my eyes but didn’t say anything else.

“Like I was saying… if you met him and you felt the magic, maybe you should have a conversation with him about it. What did he say when you asked him about it?”

“Well… I didn’t.”

“You didn’t say anything to him about it?” She laughed. “That’s not like you. At all. You have something to say about everything.”

Groaning, I pulled the comforter over my head. “Go homeeeeeeee.”

She giggled. “Kiki…?”

“I didn’t really have a chance. I was mad. So… I just kind of… stormed off and left.”

“So, you didn’t even ask him about it?”

“What was there to ask?” I questioned, frustrated since I’d had the exact same conversation with Meghan an hour earlier.

What were they missing?

“He is on a show that told a guy that if a woman is wearing a low-cut top, she must want her breasts stared at, and to openly stare. What else is there to know about him?”

“Yeah, that’s pretty shitty. But he didn’t say it, so you should at least ask him why he’s on the show.”

I sighed. “Yeah, I will. I mean, I’m stuck with him for the rest of the class so…” I shrugged, pulling the covers from my head. “I kind of have to.”

“Kiki…” Her voice was soft and sounded eerily like Mom as she used the family nickname for me. “Just hear him out. You described that guy you went out with last week as nice. You said you had a nice time with a nice guy. You called him nice looking. And while that’s very…nice. You said Carlos was like magic.”

“Alex—”

“Magic, Akila! Talk to him. You called him magic.”

“I said there was magic between us, not that he was magic.”

She shrugged. “Same thing.”

“Like I told Meghan, it’s not that I don’t plan to talk to him. I will next week. I have to. He’s my photography partner so I can’t avoid him. Some of my assignments and therefore the overall impression I’ll leave on Luca Romano depends on it. But as far as the magic goes, there’s nothing else to talk about with it. He’s a Lost Boy, and I’m a grown ass woman. There’s nothing magical about that combination.”

“That’s true. But you didn’t know about it until he told you, right?”

“Luca asked him about it and he said the name of the podcast. He never really told me specifically. He announced it to the class like it was something to be proud of.” I closed my eyes. “I was just so mad, I couldn’t speak.”

“You were mad at the fact that he was a Lost Boy or were you mad at him?”

I was quiet for a moment. “Well… I guess, both.”

“Why?”

“Because he…” My voice trailed off. “It’s hard to explain.”

“He didn’t lie to you, did he?”

Letting out a rough sigh, I shook my head. “Can we discuss this tomorrow?”

“Of course. Love you, Kiki.”

“Love you, too, Alex.”

She shut the door behind her and I heard her footsteps make their way down the hall.

As I settled against my pillows, I tried to clear my mind. But Carlos had gotten under my skin and I couldn’t shake it.

I was mad at him. Even though I wasn’t lied to, I felt like I had been. Even though I wasn’t tricked, I felt like the rug had been pulled from under me. I was mad that he was exactly the type of man I could’ve seen myself falling for. I was mad that he had drawn me in, and somehow, he got his hooks into me. I was mad that he seemed one hundred percent himself. I was mad that he made me feel something for him. I was mad that he made me like him. I was mad at him.

I tossed and turned for hours until I had to confront the truth that kept rattling around in my head.

I wasn’t mad at him. I was mad at myself.

I almost fell for the enemy.

The phone vibrated loudly against my nightstand and I startled awake. I wasn’t sure when I’d fallen asleep, but I knew immediately, I hadn’t gotten enough of it.

“Hello?” I answered the phone groggily.

“Hi!” a voice chirped in response. “May I speak with Ms. Akila Bishara, please?”

Rolling onto my side, I cleared my throat a little. “Speaking…?”

“Good morning! This is Luna Daniels with Re-Mix Magazine. How are you?”

I sat up straight. Luna Daniels?!

“Hi, hello!” I cleared my throat, attempting to make myself sound more cheerful than I had when I answered the phone. “I’m well! How are you?”

“I’m fantastic. Thanks for asking.” She paused for just a second. “Akila… beautiful name, by the way.”

“Thank you.”

“So, we called you in for the interview because we read your writing samples and articles and knew you were a gifted writer. But what we were looking for was a series proposal that would wow us.” She paused. “And your proposal did just that!”

Kicking my feet against the pillowtop mattress, I silently released all the pent-up tension and nerves that invaded my mind and body from the moment she’d said her name.

Re-Mix Magazine likes my work—correction loves my work!

“Akila?” Luna’s voice cut through my silent celebration and I realized I hadn’t spoken a word out loud.

“Oh my god,” I squeaked, scared my level of excitement would turn her off if I let it all out at once. “I-I’m-I don’t know what to say but thank you. Oh wow! I appreciate the opportunity to submit my work and then to find out that you loved it. You loved it! I’m just—I’m speechless. I’m just…wow!”

Luna laughed lightly. “Good to know! I thought I had lost you there for a minute.”

“No, no, no, no, no,” I giggled, shaking my head profusely even though she couldn’t see me.

“I wanted to call and personally invite you to the second interview with me on Friday. Full disclosure, there are only two candidates that we are moving to this round—you and another. I don’t usually meet with candidates until the final round, but the notes I received from your interview warranted me meeting both of you myself.”

“Oh wow.” I didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I was flattered to be moved to the next round, but knowing the other candidate was also just as impressive was daunting. “Thank you.”

She told me she’d email me the information and we said our goodbyes.

“Oh my god!” I whispered, nerves and excitement making my stomach flutter. And then it hit me. My dream job called to invite me for an interview. Flailing my arms and legs, kicking my bedsheets from my body, I squealed, “This is it! Oh. My. God!”

Leaping out of bed, I scrambled out of my room and down the hall. Knocking on Meghan’s door, I only momentarily waited until I heard her respond before pushing my way in.

“Apparently, I killed my interview with Re-Mix because they called me today!”

Without missing a beat, Meghan immediately started a celebratory dance with her wig in one hand and her brush in the other. “Ahhhhhh!” she screamed, jogging in place and waving the red hairpiece above her head.

I grinned at my best friend. “I know!”

“I thought you said you didn’t do your best at the interview. Tell me everything!”

“I thought I could’ve done better. I definitely didn’t think I was going to get a call back! I thought—I thought I was okay, but I didn’t feel like they liked me. I thought I was too eager, too excited, too much, I guess.”

“You’re never too much for the right people,” Meghan pointed out with her sage wisdom.

I clasped my hands together. “Amen!”

Meghan turned to face the mirror as she slid her wig onto her head. “So, let’s recap for a minute. You came home from the Re-Mix interview and ate the rest of my ice cream as you lamented about the interviewers not liking your ideas. You questioned and doubted your ideas and your abilities. And now…” She pursed her lips. “Mmm hmm.”

Covering my face, I let out an overwhelmed giggle. “I don’t know what is even going on right now!” I slid my hands down my face and to my chest. “I knew they took the interview because they liked my writing. But the position is for a series writing position that could turn into a permanent staff writer position if the series is popular. I pitched two original ideas and they looked at me like I was insane. No one reacted like I thought they might. I referenced my most recently published work in the Richland Times Dispatch and…nothing.” I shook my head in disbelief. “I really thought they didn’t like it, Meghan. I really thought I’d blown the interview.”

“See… you never know how you’re going to be blessed.”

“That’s not even the best part.” I paused, watching her brush her hair. “The magazine’s CEO and Editor in Chief called me herself.”

Spinning toward me with her hair flying around her, Meghan’s mouth was agape. “Oh my god!”

Dancing, I spun around in a circle. “Luna Daniels called me herself! Luna Daniels wants to meet me! Ahhhhhhh!”

“Ahhhhhh!” Meghan shrieked as loudly as I did. “Kiki! That’s your role model! That has to mean you have the job!”

Reality stopped my celebratory dance in mid hip thrust. “Well…” I made a face. “It’s between me and another person. Luna basically said that she loved both of our ideas, so she was going to meet with both of us on Friday and see who she likes better.”

“Wipe that look off your face! You are going to go in there and kill it. The other person is good, but you’re better. So, on Friday, you’re going to go in there and have her fall in love with you. You know why? Because you’re Akila muthafucking Bishara!”

A small laugh escaped me as I exhaled. “You’re right.” I shook off the nerves. “You’re right.”

“Say it like you mean it!”

“You’re right!” I repeated myself, louder and more forcefully.

“Say it again!”

“You’re right!”

After one final glance in the mirror, she walked over and put her hands on my shoulders. “You got this.”

I wrapped my arms around my best friend’s waist, careful not to wrinkle her pristine work attire. “Thank you for the pep talk.”

She squeezed me back. “You’re welcome. Now, I have to run because someone moved my two o’clock meeting to ten o’clock.”

My eyebrows flew up as I glanced at the time. “What?”

“Yeah…” She stretched the word out as she grabbed her handbag. “So, I won’t be stopping for coffee this morning.”

“Well, that sucks. But hopefully the meeting will turn into a huge project.”

“Yes. Fingers crossed. Because sitting in my office playing this dumbass trivia game is getting old.”

I laughed, following her down the hall, toward the front door. “Yes, because if I have to decline one more invitation to play Trivia Time, I may have to just go ahead and move out.”

Cackling with laughter, she said goodbye.