Chapter 9
Luke
Chris is upstairs changing and Jenna's outside crying and I head for the bathroom to wash my face. Brush my teeth. It's been a long ass day. Going to the bank and closing a deal that committed Chris and me to the partnership, with a thirty-year lien. We've all gotta make this work somehow.
But I also have to know what exactly happened between Jenna and him. I have an idea, I'd be a fool not to. And as I watched him take in the scene of me going down on my ex-stepdaughter, I saw his eyes. And they said he wanted to be on his knees licking Jenna's sweet pussy.
But no way in hell am I giving up that easily.
The only problem is, Jenna's eyes were written with pain, because she wants more than just me, too. She wants Chris, and Chris -- he wants her.
How the hell is everyone going to end up happy? From the looks of it, right about now, everyone's going to end up hurt. Going the kitchen, I pour myself a glass of whiskey and pour a glass for Chris to -- the good stuff --Johnny Walker, doubles, neat.
I cross my arms and wait for Chris to come back.
A few minutes later he shows, and I nod toward the whiskey. He takes it, then raises his glass to me.
"Not exactly sure what we're toasting." He has a torn look on his face and I can tell he is as confused about everything that's happened as I am.
"To Jenna?" I say, not quite sour, but not quite sweet. It's a whole hell of a lot of feelings mixed into one.
He nods. "To Jenna." He eyes me. "You want to tell me what was happening in her bedroom?" Chris raises an eyebrow and brings the whiskey back to his mouth.
"I was about to ask you the same thing. She mentioned something happening earlier, in the barn?"
"She and I had sex. I'm not gonna hide that from you, Luke."
I take a drink of the whiskey and the sharp burn slides down my throat. Nothing like the sweet taste of Jenna's pussy on my lips.
"I think we both know," I start, " that we crossed lines today. Lines you can't take back."
"I don't particularly want to take them back if you know what I mean. What happened in the barn was no accident, it was fucking destiny." Chris eyes me as if he is daring me to disagree.
"I'm not taking back what happened between Jenna and me either." I shrug. "The only problem with what happened between her and I is that it got cut off a little short. I would've liked more time with her before you came in."
"I don't suppose you knew Jenna and I had a date planned for this evening?"
Did he just say he had a date? I can't remember ever seeing Chris go on a date in his whole life. With a pang of realization, I see that Chris hasn't been with anyone all this time for the same reason I haven't. We've been holding out for the same woman all this time.
"I'm not trying to get between you," I tell him. "But dammit, the way I feel for her," I say, running my hand over my jaw. "I've never felt this way before. I sure as hell never felt for her mother."
Chris snorts. "Everybody knows you and Kathy were never in it for love. But let me ask you this, did you ever sleep with Kathy? In all that time you were married?"
I shake my head. "I'm telling you the truth, it was never like that with Kathy. She was ten years older than me, and it was pretty clear from the get-go I wasn't exactly her type."
"What do you mean her type?"
"The truth is I don't think she could've ever accepted what I had to offer. I promised to take care of her and her daughter and I did just that, but our relationship had nothing to do with chemistry. It had to do with commitment."
"Commitment to Jenna."
"Exactly. Once Kathy got her life in order, went to school, got her feet planted, I knew I could leave."
"Is that the whole truth? You left because Kathy got her life together?"
"Dammit, you won't let it drop, will you?" I smile, knowing my best friend knows me all too well. "You know that's not the whole story. Jenna was growing up, couldn't fucking look at that girl without getting a hard-on. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right to keep living in that house wanting what wasn't mine."
It feels good to admit this to Chris, because damn, there's no one else I could ever tell that to. It's been a long time keeping it all in. In all that time, though, I've never been ashamed of these feelings I have for Jenna. How could I be ashamed of what was so pure? What was so good?
"So, you're telling me you and Jenna have always had something special, and today, of all days, you acted on it?" Chris asks me. I see his glass is empty – mine is too. I refill them both. Maybe we need a little buzz to handle this kind of conversation between two grown-ass men.
"The truth? I've always wanted Jenna, and today I had her. Only trouble is," I say shaking my head.
"Only trouble is your best friend had her first."
Our eyes meet as if trying to see where we're supposed to go from here.
"I know you say what you have with her special," Chris says. "But what I have with her special too. She told me she wanted me to be her first. And so I was. Though, to be fair, she never told me that until after I took her virginity."
Maybe other men would get angry at this, hearing that their best friend took the virginity of their ex-stepdaughter, but I know Chris, and I know he doesn't have a mean bone in his body toward the people he cares about.
I know he wouldn't just sleep with Jenna -- she must've meant something to him. I remember the way Jenna looked at him in the bedroom, he meant something to her too.
"I can't lose her. Not when I just got her." Chris's knuckles are white as he grips the edge of the countertop.
"I understand, brother. Because I can't lose her either."
"What the fuck are we gonna do?"
"I don't know, the last thing I want to do is put her in the position where she has to choose between us. That's not love, that's..."
"Manipulation?"
"Exactly. I want her to be happy."
"But what makes her happy," I say looking back at Chris, "is the two of us."
He seems to follow my logic because he takes another drink of the whiskey, and so do I.
Seems like we both know what we have to do.
We want to make our girl happy.
It's all we want. It's always we've ever wanted.
We raise our glasses again, this time knowing exactly who we are raising a toast to.
"To Jenna," Chris says.
"To us giving her exactly what she wants," I add.