3

The following day I awoke feeling much better about myself. The incident with Astrid and the other cheerleaders left a sour taste in my mouth but without it I would never have met Donny or Mick, and I was still thinking about them the morning after. Unless I did something drastic it was unlikely that I would see either of them again, and although at first I had resigned myself to that fate I found that even though we lived in very different worlds I did want to see them again. I began to formulate a plan in my mind but I'd need Jennifer's help to see it through, so I went to see her as I delivered my report of the game.

“This is pretty good, in some ways it's better than Ricky's,” she said after perusing the article. Once she had done her editorial duty she tossed it on the desk and leaned forward with an excited gleam in her eyes, getting down to the business that really mattered to her. “How was the party?”

“It was okay,” I said, but I was unable to hide the smile on my face and she clapped her hands with glee.

“You got laid didn't you?!” she exclaimed

“Not quite. Actually I barely spoke to anyone apart from Donny and Mick. I even got into the pool with Mick and we were both in our underwear.”

“And you still didn't get laid? I'm starting to think there's something wrong with you.”

“A load of people jumped in and kind of ruined the mood.”

“Still, at least you have a couple of crushes now.”

“I do not!”

Jennifer sighed and picked up my report. “Most of this is about Donny and Mick, which I don't mind because they are the two people that the college wants to read about but it's pretty clear what you were focusing on during the match, not that I blame of course, but don't try to deny it. I know these things.”

“Okay, well, anyway, I quite enjoyed covering the game and I was thinking that while Ricky is still sick I could do some more work in his area. I was thinking about doing a series of interviews with the players. Maybe I could start off with Donny and Mick, really get into what makes them tick so people get to know the real guys behind the image that we get shown all over the place.”

“Which of course would allow you to have some more alone time with them. Are you suggesting that you use your role at this hallowed establishment for personal gain?” Jennifer said, her stern look quickly giving way to a wide smile. “I thought you'd never learn the things I've been trying to teach you! Of course you can, and good luck,” she said with a wink as I left the office.

It took me a little while to go through the proper channels but I soon arranged interviews with Donny and Mick, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. I was a little nervous about seeing them again outside of the context of a party and I hoped that they'd remember me.

Donny was first. I met him in a coffee shop. He had a satchel that was slung over his shoulder. If I didn't know it already I would never have guessed that he was a football player. We grabbed a couple of coffees. I think I was more nervous than he was because he said he'd done these kind of things before. I told him that I wanted to do something different and I didn't want to focus on the football so much as I wanted to show what he was like away from the field. He spoke in a quietly confident voice and as the interview went on I noticed that people were staring at us. I have to admit that I liked that they thought we were on a date.”

“So what are your other passions outside of football? I know it must take up a lot of your time but is that the only thing you like to focus on?”

“No, not at all. There are some people who live it 24/7 but I need a break. I mean, I love it and I can't imagine what my life would be like without it but there are some times when I need to take a step back and do something else to get my mind off it. I like to watch movies, that's my favorite way to unwind. After a game I'm usually buzzing so it's good to clear my head, plus it's a way to escape everything.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well right now I've mostly been playing for fun, I mean, at the end I always did dream of being a pro but it was far away. That's getting closer and the pressure can be pretty intense. Scouts are watching you, you have to make sure to keep track of what teams are trying to get you and how they've treated players in similar positions to you before, and every game you're hoping that you're not going to suffer some unfortunate injury that will make all this time and effort a complete waste.”

“That does sound a lot,” I said, and was surprised that he seemed so troubled. I never imagined that people like him ever had worries or doubts. Everything was easy for them, or so I thought. “Does that not affect your performance though, like, have you ever pulled out of a tackle because you've been afraid to get injured?”

“Oh no, once I'm on the field I clear my head and stay focused on the game. Mick helps with that. We've been playing football with each other since we were kids. Even if I was thinking that he'd never let me get away with it. We've known each other for so long it's like we can read each others' minds and when he's there on the field with me I know there's nothing that can touch me, and he knows the reverse is true.”

“Sounds like you two have had a good friendship.”

“Yeah. Thinking about it we're more like brothers really, although he does tease me about my love of history. We're not exactly the same.”

“You like history?”

“Hell yeah! I wanted to be an archaeologist until I found out that the reality wasn't going to be like Indiana Jones, but I'm still interested in it. I love looking back to the past and seeing how humans used to live. Sometimes it's surprising how much we haven't changed really.”

I asked him more questions and found him more fascinating than I had imagined, and the time we had together flew by. I was disappointed that we had to wrap up and tried to think of another excuse to see him but it turned out that I didn't need one. He asked me for a date, saying that it was unfair that I got to ask all the questions. At first I thought it was a joke but he was serious, and I accepted. Then I went to see Mick.

He could only fit me in after a training session so I arrived at the gym. He was freshly out of the shower, skin glistening with the afterglow of a good workout, and I felt guilty for feeling attracted to him after Donny had just asked me out on a date. Mick and I sat outside the gym. He pulled out some fruit and began eating, offering me some. I declined. As he ate the juice ran down his chin, giving him this savage air as though he were an animal, and this only increased my arousal. My attraction to him was mostly physical and I couldn't bring myself to tear my eyes away from him. My interest in Donny grew the more I got to know him but with Mick it was an instant thing, and I found it difficult to concentrate.

“So what did Donny say about me?” Mick said.

“Uh, he said that you two had been friends for years and that you were more like brothers.”

“He would say that, he's always been a bit soft when it comes to things like that.”

“He also told me about the pressure that the two of you are placed under. What do you do to escape it?”

“Pressure?” he said, almost as though he had never heard the word before, “I don't believe in the thing. People always try to make it out as though there's all this stuff going on but I try not to think about it. Life's too short to worry. I get to do something I love, and I'm going to enjoy it for as long as it lasts. Even if I don't make it as a pro it's not going to make me enjoy the game any less, and I'm sure there will be something else I can do if it doesn't work out.”

“What would you like to do then, if you couldn't play football for a living?”

“I'd still like to stay in the game. Maybe I could coach some kids. I'd like to see the world as well, and the rest of the country really. If things go the way I plan then I've got a long life ahead of me and there's plenty I want to do. Right now I'm loving life, and long may it continue.” The difference between the two guys was stark, but their love for each other came through when they talked about it each other and I found that I was envious of their friendship. I had never been that close with anyone else before, but although they were different there was one thing they had in common; they both wanted to date me. I meant to tell Mick that Donny had already asked me out, but for some reason I didn't say that and I accepted his invitation to go out as well. Suddenly I had two dates with the two most eligible men on campus.

I told myself that it wouldn't do any harm, that I'd just go and hang out with them and see what happened. It wasn't a big deal. I also told myself that I'd be honest with them and tell them, but in the end I didn't. I sought the advice of Jennifer, who was actually a sage in these matters and she told me to chill out. This was her area of expertise so I trusted her. Donny took me to a museum and taught me a lot about various periods of history. I got the sense that he enjoyed being away from the bubble of college as he could be more than a star football player. He spoke with a passionate zeal and it was easy to be swept up in his enthusiasm. I told him that he'd make a good teacher and he laughed, telling me that it wasn't the first time he'd been told that.

After we went to the museum we took a stroll and by the river he took my hand and kissed me, a tender kiss that began softly then rose like a fire, enveloping my entire body. It was perfect.

I almost canceled my date with Mick, but I thought it would be rude and part of me still wanted to see what it would be like to go out with him. I wondered if that made me a bad person but I figured I had been out of the dating game for so long that I needed to catch up, and this was a hell of a way to do it. None of us had made any promises to each other either, so I just wanted to go on a date with Mick and then I'd make my decision.

Mick ended up taking me to a little funfair that was touring across the country and happened to be in town. It made me feel as if I was in the 50s. We went on the dodgems, he won a stuffed bear for me and showed his strength by making the weight hit the bell, impressing everyone around. When I arrived I didn't think I would initially enjoy myself but he had me laughing hard. There was a light spirit about him and he wanted to enjoy the world, and this in turn made me enjoy myself more than I had in a long time, which only proved more difficult for me as it made my feelings go into conflict. It was on the Ferris Wheel when he kissed me, a primal kiss that held within it all his passion, and I could barely handle it myself.

By the end of the night I was no closer to deciding which guy I liked more and when I went to bed my mind was reeling with thoughts of them both. My lips were on fire with both their kisses and my heart beat with excitement while thinking of both of them. Jennifer was no help at all and only teased me for getting into this circumstance. It took me ages to get one guy interested in me and now I had two, but the last thing I wanted was to get in between their friendship. I felt pangs of guilt when they spoke of each other, and they spoke of each other often. It was clear that they loved each other deeply. But though I felt guilty it did not stop me from enjoying rampant, steamy sexual fantasies about them, making me feel so delightful and delirious as images of the two of them swirled around my head and I awoke to new realms of pleasure.

I'd never had a problem indulging my imagination before, but men like Donny and Mick had never entered my thoughts. I had always been drawn to slim, brooding types with pale skin, the kind of men that hung out at coffee shops with a laptop out, pouring their soul out into a story. The hidden passion that lay under their calm skin made me aroused, and I wanted to be the one they revealed their true natures to behind closed doors. Yet now that I knew Donny and Mick I couldn't think of anything but them. Before I had gotten to know them I had dismissed them as dumb jocks with little substance, but now I was in awe of them. Donny was clever and had depths that went beyond the stereotype that preceded him. He was sensitive and looked to the future not with fear, but with a sense that everything was impermanent and from this came a drive to do as well as he could while he was able. Mick had a similar sense but he didn't seem to be fazed by anything. He only wanted to enjoy life. He was uninhibited and I can honestly say that I had never known any two people like these men.

I thought of Donny first. I imagined how he would look deep into my eyes, those dark pupils of his staring into my soul, stripping away all the layers until there wasn't anything left, until I was completely naked and vulnerable to him, exposed, and yet I would feel safe with him as well, his arms cradling my inexperienced body, and I would trust him with every precious part of me. I wanted to feel his warm breath against mine as he moved along my neck, his hand curling around my skin and moving lower, fingers always exploring. I wanted to feel his kisses below my ear and his hot breath washing over me. He'd pull my hair away, leaving my skin bare and naked, all ready for him, my body at his command. I wanted to fall limply into his arms and let him undress me slowly, peeling the clothes away.

My eyes closed as I rolled around in bed, my hands delving into my dark depths, guttural moans escaping from my throat as I thought about what it would be like to be held in his muscular arms, to be in the place where every other girl on campus wanted to be. I wanted to curl up against him and let my lips and hands run down his rippling muscles, to feel his breaths get longer and more ardent as I slipped my hands underneath his clothes to the warm flesh that lay below. I wanted our eyes to meet in the midst of the heat of passion, sharing an intimate secret, knowing something that only the two of us shared. I thought of him burning against my thigh, threatening to burst out of his seams. I fantasized about driving my hand below into him, gripping that which he most wanted me to have. The masculine, heroic Donny, the man who had saved me from the cheerleaders, the man who was troubled by the future but never let it sway him from the current day.

I writhed painfully as my fingers got deeper and deeper inside me, slick with my juice, thrusting hard and fast as the pleasure burst within me. Every pore in my body sizzled and I had never had such intense thoughts before. My head arched back as I thought about his lips being dragged down my body, kissing me tenderly as they moved further and further down until he was burying himself in me, his head disappearing under my slender fingers, covered in my glory. I thought about his tongue tasting me, and in the back of my mind I heard the echoes of his murmured delight. My free hand rose up and I caught my finger in between my teeth, biting down on it as my other hand worked frantically inside me.

Just as I was starting to think about Donny going down on me my mind shifted, and suddenly he had transformed into Mick. The dark hair gave way to blonde locks, his body increased slightly inside, and he started to laugh, looking up at me and smiling. With his strong hands he turned me over and pulled me up so that my back was turned to him. He was more wild than Donny, closer to his primal nature. His arms wrapped around me, threatening to crush me while he growled in my ears, his teeth sinking into my flesh. I was limp in his arms and completely controlled by him. I wanted to be controlled by him. Wanted to surrender to him and let him have his way with me. I wanted him to show me what life could be like if I just gave in to my wildest desires. His big strong hand would run down my chest, groping at my breasts. Nothing was off limits to him and even if it had been I could sense that it wouldn't stop him.

I knew he was an animal. He was happy go lucky outside the bedroom but there was a savage side to him as well, a side that he showed on the football pitch where he barreled through the opposing team like a wrecking ball through a concrete wall. An unstoppable force was meeting my fragile little body and I wanted more, more, more!

Sweat broke out on my skin as the fantasy seized my mind and wouldn't let go. I felt my heart beat within my breast, pounding against my rib cage. My nipples were erect and I twisted them, sending waves of pleasure rippling through my skin, knowing that Mick would have clamped on them with his fingers, pinched and pulled as though he was going to rip them off my skin, then his hands around my hips, threatening to tear me apart. Then the two men merged within my mind, both forms and visions of them coming together. I didn't know how to separate them, didn't even think that I wanted to even though I knew deep in my heart that I would have to choose one over the other, but they were both so erotic and intense and I didn't want to lose them. I could feel Donny's strong yet tender touch, then Mick's way of clawing at my skin. I drowned in thoughts of them pounding at my brain all the while the orgasmic feelings were taking hold of my soul. They rose and rumbled within me, threatening to explode, I was so close to a sweet climax. Donny and Mick were both running through my mind and I couldn't focus on one of them over the other. They were both there, both present within me as my hand worked its magic in the deep recesses of my body.

My mind was alive with heat. I felt this heat surge through my body, making my hair stand on end, making everything about me feel more alive than it ever had before. I literally cried out in exquisite agony as it all became overwhelming and too much to handle, thinking about Mick again, his animal instincts guiding him, making me more primal as well. I was laying on my side, having rolled over from my back, but I turned even more so that I could bury my face in the pillow, thinking about Mick holding my head down, making it harder to breathe. I pushed my ass up in the air and felt the slick juice drip down my thighs. I was soaking and delirious when the orgasm hit me. My eyes were closed and I had the image of Mick and Donny inside my head, both men inside and out of me, watching as the orgasm rocked my body and made me collapse, breathless, my head still against the pillow, my chest rising as I tried to recover my breaths from being left a wreck.

I sank down, my body relaxing in the afterglow of erotic delight. A smile played upon my lips and my eyes were still closed. I dared not open them because I didn't want to dispel the illusion just yet. I wanted to hold onto the thought of having them both near me, because I knew that I would never have the reality. I would never know the sheer delight of having both their smoldering, masculine bodies beside me, both of them offering something unique and different to titillate and pleasure me. But I would have to choose one. I couldn't have them both, couldn't have everything. My body was still aching for what they had to offer and I wanted to experience it. I wanted to give myself to them, give them everything I had including my virginity, let them have it all over and over again until I was left a writhing, frantic mess. I'd never had an orgasm with such intensity before and I knew that the real thing would be better.

But I also knew that I would have to choose one over the other, and I would have to try not feel regret about the man I did not choose. Both of them offered different things, and satisfied different needs, but I still didn't know how I was going to choose one over the other. Donny, with his strength and kindness. Mick, with his animal nature and willingness to push me to my limits. I knew that whichever one I chose would take me to new heights of pleasure, but I would be missing out on something as well. I wiped my hand with some tissue and lay on my back. Eventually I opened my eyes to stare at the ceiling, much preferring to gaze at their naked form. I knew that the reality would be better than whatever my inexperienced mind could conjure, but I could only have one, and I tried to think of which man I would prefer but I couldn't choose between them. I lay there, naked and sweaty, all the orgasmic fluid seeping out of my body as my heart returned to its normal rate and my breathing became more calm. I groaned as I placed my hands over my head and wished that I had not met both of them, but I was in a unique position and I wondered if anyone had to deal with the same things as I had to deal with.