THE GRIEF THAT I’d been feeling from my brother shifted to astonishment…and I had no idea why. He was saying goodbye to Ben at the hospital with my parents. Nothing about that should have been remarkable—just sad. But I was definitely feeling shock from him. If he came home and told me he saw a gaggle of pigs in the sky, the feeling of surprise and disbelief wouldn’t come close to what he was feeling now. Whatever had happened, it was big. But Julian didn’t seem scared or worried, so I tried not to think too much about it.
I had my own problems anyway.
Hunter. As the night stretched on, he filled more and more of my thoughts. Now that Hunter had my family’s blood running through him, I could feel his location, like I could feel everyone else’s. The familial bond had activated a couple of hours ago, before darkness had fallen. Not rushing to him when it had kicked in was a challenge; not rushing to him now was equally challenging. He would be waking up soon, and I didn’t know what to expect from him once he was fully converted. I honestly didn’t know if he would convert. It would be just like him to stoically refuse to eat.
There were rumors in the house that Dad had almost died on the night of his conversion for just that reason. It wasn’t something my family talked much about, but I’d gleaned enough to realize that Dad had woken up when Mom was around, and she’d nearly become his first meal as an undead vampire. I couldn’t imagine the horror that Mom had felt, or the guilt that Dad would have felt if he’d accidentally killed her that night.
I laid my aching body down on Grandma Linda’s warm lap and tried not to think about that either. Grandma stroked my hair, murmuring that everything would be all right. Grandpa and Alanna were sitting on the other small couch, absorbed in their own quiet conversation; they were reminiscing about Ben. I tuned out their words as I watched my old, gray-haired grandpa sling his arm around his youthful, beautiful wife.
To the outside world, they seemed an odd pair. Some people called Grandpa a cradle-robber, said his relationship with his wife set a bad example for his grandchildren. If they only knew the truth—that Grandpa was one of the most moral and honest men I’d ever known. If people knew that he’d adored, loved, and remained faithful to his wife for several decades now, they’d change their tune about him.
Imogen paced before the sliding glass doors. I wasn’t sure if she was anxious over Ben’s fate, or concerned about her mother’s unseemly bond with my boyfriend. Probably both. I was a little…confused…about Halina’s link with Hunter. In one regard, it was sweet that she was just as worried about him as I was. In another, it was strange to have someone else care so much about him. I didn’t want to be jealous, but, yeah, I kind of was.
As time ticked by, Julian’s level of shock evened out. I relaxed as his mood improved. For some reason, he was happy now…content. I wasn’t sure why his mood had shifted again. That was the annoying part of our bond. We felt each other’s emotions, but we couldn’t feel the reason behind the emotion. It could be incredibly frustrating at times. All I could assume was that Ben had been successfully wiped, and Julian had finally accepted it. I hoped I could be as accepting of it as Julian one day, but I was still feeling a little bitter about the whole thing. Especially since I wasn’t allowed to be there for it.
Just as I yawned, and considered heading up to bed, Halina’s form streaked away from the hospital. It happened so fast it sent an electric zing through me, like someone had snuck up behind me and slipped an ice cube down my back. I shot up from my grandma’s lap and stared out the window, to where I could feel Halina blurring away. Imogen and Alanna were staring as well.
“What is it?” Grandma Linda asked, touching my shoulder.
Imogen looked back at her, her brow furrowed. “Mother left the others.”
Ignoring the ache in my shoulder, I stood up. “She’s going to Hunter.” In a whisper, I added, “He’s awake.”
Imogen walked over to me. “You can’t know that, child.”
I looked up into her pale, sky-blue eyes, eyes that were inherently common in my family. “But she could, right? Grandma Halina would know…she’d feel it?”
I looked around at everyone, but none of them answered me. Truth was, we didn’t know. No one in my family, save my father, had ever turned someone. I wasn’t sure if Dad had been aware when Mom awoke from her conversion. But, then again, Mom’s conversion wasn’t your typical vampire turning. Hers had been more along the lines of what mine would be like. A pureblood conversion was completely different; our species were more like cousins than direct descendants.
I looked back to where I could feel my grandmother. She knew, and she was running to him…to try to save him. It warmed and terrified me all at the same time.
Mom and Dad returned with Julian not too much later. Dad had a big grin on his face. Shaking his head, he told the room, “You are not going to believe what happened with Ben.”
As Dad relayed the story, I had to agree with him. It was hard to believe. Ben had vampire blood in him? He didn’t have any of our “gifts,” so it was very, very diluted, but it was in there somewhere, buried deep. I supposed that would explain how he held his own against vampires. He had a tiny, tiny edge.
Imogen and Alanna were ecstatic over the news, and not just for the fact that Ben would get to keep his memories. No, they were overjoyed that returning our line to humanity was indeed possible. Breeding out the vampiric blood was one of the many reasons why they had all chosen to have children.
As the news sunk in, Julian twisted his lips. “Uh, Dad, that means Olivia…”
Dad’s smile fell a little. “Right…we won’t be able to wipe her either. I guess we’ll just have to be extra careful around her, to keep her in the dark for as long as possible.” His eyes scanned Julian and me. “No need for her to grow up before her time.” His tone was remorseful, and I knew it was because he regretted how quickly our childhood had been taken from us. It wasn’t his fault, though.
Walking over, I looped my arm around his waist and rested my head against his shoulder. After a moment of silence, I asked him the question that was pounding through my brain. “Dad…do you think Hunter will be all right?”
Dad took a moment before he answered me. “I don’t know, kiddo. I’m sorry.”
With trepidation, I asked, “Can I go to him?”
Dad smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “You already know I would never agree to that. It’s too dangerous, Nika. He’s too dangerous.” My heart sank, but I wasn’t surprised.
Halina stayed away all night long. Dad eventually made Julian and me go up to bed, since we had school in the morning. After giving me a warm hug, Julian sauntered off to his room and crashed onto his mattress. He was asleep in seconds. I stared at his form sprawled across his bed for a moment before I closed our mutual bathroom door.
I took my time brushing my teeth and washing my face. My stomach had a huge knot in it, though, and I couldn’t stop thinking about Hunter. I couldn’t help but worry about him. He would have woken up starving, near death. If he didn’t get food right away, his body wouldn’t complete the changeover, and he would die. He could be dead already. Maybe Halina was staying away out of grief. I wasn’t sure what I would do if he died. I wasn’t sure what I would do if he came back to life either.
I woke up the next morning feeling like I hadn’t slept at all. I must have fallen asleep at some point, though, since the last thing I remembered was staring at my dark ceiling. The dull grayness I woke up to told me it was morning. I could hear Julian lightly snoring as I got ready for school. I let him sleep in; he hadn’t gotten the drug-induced rest that I had yesterday. Poor guy had been forced to go to school on practically zero sleep. I thought if Dad hadn’t been so worried and frantic, he would have let Julian skip. Dad had just needed one thing to return to normal I guess.
I meandered downstairs once I was ready for the day. Mom and Dad both looked up at me when I entered the kitchen. Noting the quietness of our home, I took a second to pinpoint the rest of my family. Everyone was back at the ranch except Halina. She was still miles away from us with Hunter…or Hunter’s body. Not ever having lost a family member, I had no idea if I would stop feeling Hunter’s location if he died, or if he would forever be a blip on my internal radar. I never wanted to find out the answer to that question.
Mom stood and examined me as I poured a bowl of cereal. She felt my forehead, cupped my cheeks, checked my eyes. “I’m not sick, Mom,” I grumbled, batting her hands away.
Sighing, she turned her attention to my bandages. I’d removed the one from my throat, opting for a high turtleneck to cover the raw, red line instead. The bandages on my shoulder and arm were clean, the wounds no longer bleeding. Mom would have known all of that just by smelling me, but she needed the reassurance, so she thoroughly inspected each injured area on me. “Are you done?” I asked, feeling grumpy and out of sorts.
Kissing my cheek, she murmured, “I suppose so.” She pointed to the counter, where a carafe of steaming blood was waiting. “I want you to drink up before you go, though.”
The smell emanating from the stainless-steel container made my mouth water. It had been a while since I’d had blood. Forgetting my bowl of sugary goodness, I got a glass from the cupboard and poured myself a cup. My fangs were down before I even finished pouring. Closing my eyes, I tilted the cup to my lips. It was heaven. I might not need blood like the others, or even crave it like they do, but I was still recovering, and my body wanted it right now; I savored the metallic sweetness as I gulped it down.
Gasping for air when I was done, I immediately poured a second glass. A low growl escaped me as I tipped that one back. Blood for a vampire was a natural, revitalizing painkiller. Gabriel said the introduction of blood into our system released endorphins, much like drugs do with humans. It was why some vampires got carried away with drinking. Whatever the reason, I instantly felt more alert and a lot less sore.
When my thirst was satiated, I finished my less-satisfying breakfast. Julian rolled out of bed and joined our group right as I was putting my bowl in the sink. He looked a little worn down, but he had a huge smile on his face and his mood was buoyant. Even though I’d been in and out of it yesterday, his mood had been similar. He was excited to go to school…and Julian was never excited for school. I had to assume that it was a person who was boosting his spirits, and not what he was being taught.
As he poured himself a glass of blood, I cautiously asked, “Why are you so peppy?”
Smiling around his fangs, he shrugged. “No reason.”
He was practically bursting at the seams now, and even Mom and Dad noticed. “Something going on, son?” Dad asked, a knowing smirk on his face.
Julian glanced at everybody, then lowered his cup from his lips. “Well, besides the fact that Ben is sort of one of us?” He paused as Dad’s grin grew. “Grandma let Arianna keep her memories.”
The smile fell from Dad’s face. “Why would she let her remember?”
Julian brought the cup back to his mouth. Under his breath, he murmured, “Because she’s sort of my girlfriend.”
My head snapped around to Julian so fast it made my shoulder ache. “You asked her out?” Shock swept through me as I analyzed my brother’s joy. He was feeling that for…Arianna? Finally? Eyes narrowing, I asked, “What about Raquel?” If my brother was playing some kind of game with my best friend, well, I would give new meaning to the word Mom-zilla.
Seeing the seriousness in my expression, Julian set his cup down on the counter. “I don’t feel for Raquel what I used to feel.” He gave me a soft smile. “Arianna has my heart…and I told Raquel as much.”
I was floored. Not only had he chosen Arianna, but he’d confessed his feelings for her to the woman he’d been drooling over for months, if not years. This was huge for Julian. I automatically swept him into a hug, and my parents chuckled. Then a thought struck me. Pulling back, I told him, “You better not break her heart. I would have to stake you.”
Julian sighed in a clearly love-struck way. “I’m not going to, Nika.”
Mom stood and gave Julian a kiss on the head. “That’s wonderful, honey. Arianna is a great girl.”
Dad walked over and put his hand on Julian’s shoulder. “Congratulations, Julian. I told you that you would find someone who’d accept you for who you really are.” Pride blossomed in Julian’s chest at Dad’s words. It was instantly replaced with embarrassment when Dad said, “And I think we should have the sex talk, now that you’re seeing someone.”
Julian flushed with color as he groaned. “Dad…I know how it works.”
Dad shook his head. “It’s not the mechanics that we need to talk about. There’s a lot more to sex than…sex.”
I giggled at Julian’s mortification when Dad swung his eyes to mine. “That goes for you, too, Nika. With Hunter still out there…”
My laughter died along with his sentence. Melancholy filled me as my thoughts turned toward my wayward boyfriend. In a whisper, I told him, “Don’t worry, Dad. I don’t think I’ll be having sex anytime soon.”
I sighed and Dad wrapped his arms around me. He murmured in my hair that everything would be all right, and I hoped that was true. We just didn’t know anything yet…and it was maddening.
Watching Arianna and Julian at school was sweet, and a little annoying. I was used to my brother brooding and pining for a girl he couldn’t have. Not that I wanted him that way, it was just how things had been for a long time. I was thrilled that Julian had finally moved past Raquel, but I was suffering from a gigantic helping of jealousy, since my own love life hadn’t worked out so well.
Sitting on the steps with Julian, Trey, and Arianna after school, I shuddered as a gust of chilly wind wrapped around us. We’d be coming into winter soon, the holidays nearly upon us. The ski resorts would be fully open by the end of the month, and my family always made a point to take a break from the holidays and spend a weekend up there. Since the chill didn’t bother the undead, playing in the Utah snow was a favorite activity for the vampires in my life. Julian and I enjoyed it, too; we just needed extra layers to stay warm.
When school let out for Christmas, we all usually flew down to California to see Aunt Ashley and Uncle Christian. They had a nice place close to the water. Mom and Dad would spend hours on the beach, regardless of the weather. Julian and I would join them for a little bit before heading back to the warmer, dry land.
Yes, a bunch of fun family traditions were coming up, and I should have been euphoric about them, but I wasn’t. This was my favorite time of year, and I didn’t have it in me to enjoy it. Not with everything that had happened. Not with so much unknown. Was Hunter alive? Was Halina alive? Was Hunter’s dad still breathing? And if he was…would he come after us? Would we ever be safe?
Starla arrived right on time and stepped out of her vehicle to wave at us. She was wearing a form-fitting sweater dress, warm leggings, and knee-high boots. Her spiky blonde hair was expertly spritzed into place and huge, bug-like sunglasses framed her face. She looked like she’d just stepped from the pages of a fashion magazine.
Trey whistled and bumped Julian’s shoulder. “Damn, man, your mom is seriously hot.”
Julian exchanged an amused glance with Arianna. “Um, thanks…I think.”
After saying goodbye to my friends, I plodded off to her car. Julian stayed behind, giving Arianna a series of light, adorable, sickening kisses. They were still lip-locked by the time I reached Starla’s car. Pulling down her sunglasses, Starla glanced at me. “Want to start a pool on how long it takes them to jump in the sack?”
I grimaced. God, no. I was not ready for that. Feeling Julian’s joy when he kissed her was bad enough. Feeling…that…would be downright horrifying. Understanding my expression, Starla popped a bubble with her gum and looked back at Julian. “Oh, damn, you’re gonna feel that too, aren’t you?”
She looked back at me, and I glumly nodded. Grimacing, she shook her head. “Father has got to fix you guys.”
I frowned at her use of the word fix, then nodded. Yeah, she was right, we did need to be fixed…and soon. Not having to feel my brother have sex for the first time would be fabulous.
Starla took us home and surprisingly stayed there until my parents came home. Everyone was on high alert until we learned about Hunter and his dad’s fate. I felt pretty confident that Connor was too preoccupied to worry about us right now, but…I could be wrong.
The evening took forever. I paced the living room, waiting for the cursed sun to go down. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen once it did, but I wanted the damn thing extinguished so I could find out. Dad watched me like a hawk. He seemed nervous, like he thought I might zip away to Hunter at any moment. Honestly, I was tempted. Halina was still with him. Or her body was at any rate. It was slim, but there was definitely a chance that Hunter had taken her out…she’d done it to her maker after all.
My hands were fisted as I watched the last golden rays of sun sink below the mountaintops. I held my breath as I waited…for something. Halina was so far away from me that I couldn’t tell if she was moving or not. I only knew her general direction. It was frustrating, and I murmured, “Come on…do something,” under my breath.
Dad came up behind me and put a hand on my back. “Nika, stressing isn’t going to help.”
I looked up at him, tears in my eyes. “I need to know.”
Dad reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. “I need to know, too.” He turned away from the window as he dialed someone’s number. I wasn’t sure who he was calling; Halina didn’t carry a cell phone, and Dad didn’t know Hunter’s number. I doubted Hunter had it in him to answer any phone call right now anyway. When a detached voice asked, “Hello?” I instantly realized that Halina hadn’t run to Hunter alone…Gabriel was with her, and he did have a cell phone.
“How is she?” Dad asked. It annoyed me that Dad had asked about Halina first. I knew that was his main concern, though, and while it was a genuine concern of mine too, I ached to know if Hunter had made it or not.
Thanking my enhanced hearing, I listened for Gabriel’s response. “She’s fine. Sorry I couldn’t answer your call last night. It was a little…hairy for a moment, but things have calmed.”
I looked up at Dad, not realizing he’d called yesterday. He must have done that behind the soundproof doors. Shifting my focus to his phone, I asked, “And Hunter?”
Hearing me, Gabriel answered immediately. “The boy survived his conversion. He was fed well. We could have left him last night, but Halina…refuses to leave his side. She spent the entire day with him.” Gabriel’s voice was a little disgruntled.
I was a little bothered by that news, as well, but too overjoyed at the fact that Hunter was alive to really care. I held my hands to my mouth as happy tears blurred my vision. He made it.
Watching my reaction, Dad asked Gabriel, “And his father?”
Gabriel sighed. “Took off the moment his son fed. I followed him for a bit…but I didn’t want to leave Halina alone with Hunter for very long. Last I saw of him, he was headed north, away from town.”
Dad nodded. “I’m sure he’ll need time to recover from this shock.” Pausing, Dad locked gazes with Mom. “But eventually he will recover, and he’ll return…for his son.”
“Agreed. We will need to be ever watchful, Teren.”
Dad sniffed and closed his eyes for a moment. Reopening them, he asked, “Will you be coming home soon?”
Gabriel grunted. “I do not think so.” A rare, irritated emotion laced his voice. “The child refuses to go with us, and Halina will not leave him alone. They seem to be…at odds for the moment.”
Dad blinked. “Isn’t he bonded to Great-Gran? Shouldn’t he want to be with her?”
“Yes, he is…but he’s fighting it…and…” Gabriel paused, and said the next part so quietly that I had to strain to hear him, “his bond to her is not nearly as strong as her bond to him. He has only a vague desire to be near her. It’s extremely annoying to Halina that he’s so aloof about the whole thing.”
I exhaled with relief again, glad that my boyfriend wasn’t obsessed with my grandmother. That would have made things even weirder for me, and my life couldn’t get much weirder.
His voice back to normal, Gabriel added, “He also refuses to eat…or should I say, bite. He will only drink blood once it’s been exposed to the air. Halina is worried that he will starve if she leaves him.”
That alarmed me, and I took a step forward. “She has to stay with him then.” My wide eyes met Dad’s. “She can’t let him starve.” Starving a vampire wouldn’t kill them outright, not after they’d fully converted, but it was horribly painful, and dangerous. A starved vampire would do things they wouldn’t normally do…horrible stuff that the legends and myths were centered around. Hunter would never forgive himself if he turned into that kind of monster.
Dad nodded and smiled at me. “She won’t let that happen to him, Nika.” To Gabriel, he added, “Come home when you can then. And…be careful.”
“You as well.”
Gabriel disconnected, and Dad put his phone away. I was happy and unnerved at the same time. They were both alive, but things weren’t exactly running smoothly. And Hunter was refusing to eat…which meant he was disgusted, appalled by what he was. He was hurting, and I couldn’t do anything about it. Not from here anyway.
Seeing my expression, Dad pointed at me. “You can’t go to him, Nika. Not now. Not yet. He’s far too dangerous.”
I bit my lip to not snap some rebellious comment at him. I knew he was right. Hunter was a newly transformed, resentful pureblood. He might have been hesitant to kill me before, but now that he’d been forced into a world he didn’t want, he might not be so reluctant. And he was super-charged now. Faster, stronger, nearly impervious. If he wanted me dead…I would probably be dead.
Flopping down on the couch, I nodded my agreement. I wouldn’t go to him. Even though it was going to tear me in two, I would stay away from him. For now.
THREE WEEKS PASSED and not much changed. Julian and I continued with school, while my family continued their work at the ranch. Ben flew back home to rest up and try to repair things with his wife. From what Dad told us, his little near-fatal accident while visiting our family had rejuvenated his marriage. Tracey couldn’t stand the thought of losing him, and they’d pretty much patched things up. Of course, he was still lying to her on a constant basis. I hoped that wouldn’t bite him in the ass again. Ben deserved to be happy.
My brother was finally at peace with himself. I think the fact that he didn’t have to hide anything from Arianna helped a lot. Julian was becoming a stronger person by her side; he hadn’t had a panic attack since everything with Hunter and his dad had happened. Watching my brother grow into a man was inspiring, but watching his relationship grow was hard on me. Julian’s newfound happiness seemed to highlight my emptiness. I was still thrilled for him, though; he deserved someone warm and sweet like Arianna.
Halina still hadn’t left Hunter’s side, and he still wasn’t ready to return to the city. They were getting progressively closer to Salt Lake, but were still just out of range. It was disheartening to feel them getting closer to me when I knew I had to stay away from him. I just wanted to see him, make sure he was okay. Apologize for what happened to him…
My musings were interrupted by a wet snowball sliding down the back of my neck. I spun to see Julian chuckling at me, his cheeks rosy as the winter air nipped at his skin. He was holding Arianna’s hand as our family took a leisurely walk around the neighborhood. Since Connor hadn’t made a peep since his son’s conversion, our family was falling back into our old routine.
Dad and Gabriel kept an ear to the ground, listening for any word of an attack being made on a vampire, but all was quiet in the area. Connor had moved on…abandoned his son. It saddened me that he’d fled, but with his beliefs, what other choice did he have? He would never accept what his son was. To him, Hunter had died the day Halina had drained him.
Giving Julian a dry look, I reached down and grabbed a fistful of snow. Quickly compacting it into an ice ball, I chucked it at him. He had to blur a bit to dodge, and Arianna jabbed him in the ribs. “No super powers, Julian,” she scolded.
Mom and Dad gave each other an approving glance as Julian dropped his mouth open in protest. “Was I supposed to just let it hit me?”
At the same time, all of us told him, “Yes.”
Julian scowled until Arianna leaned up and kissed his cheek. Then the poor sap melted. Happy as I was for them, I wanted to roll my eyes. Now I understood why my parents annoyed Starla so much. A person could only take so much sappiness.
I looked up at Hunter’s old house when we walked by it. We didn’t usually go this way, not anymore. The salmon-colored home was abandoned. When it was clear that Hunter and his dad weren’t going to return, the owner had boxed up all their stuff and put it into storage somewhere. Except his sister’s ashes. I’d snuck into the house and retrieved those. I wasn’t sure why, just…if it were my brother in an urn, I wouldn’t want him boxed up and locked away somewhere. I would want him to be safe. I would want him to be with someone who cared. And I still cared about Hunter…try as I might not to.
When we got to the driveway, Dad reached back and grabbed my hand. I smiled up at him, then shifted my eyes to Hunter’s house again. It saddened me that someone else was going to be living there soon. Even though Hunter hadn’t been here long, the home felt like his, and I would always think of it that way.
Eventually, we made it back to our house. Arianna and Julian disappeared into the kitchen to have hot fudge sundaes before Arianna had to go home. I stayed on the porch, drinking in the chilly night air. Mom gave me a kiss goodnight, then went into the house, respectfully giving me space. Dad stayed outside with me. “It will get easier, Nika,” he told me.
I wasn’t sure how that statement could possibly be true, but I appreciated the sentiment anyway. I was about to thank him, when I felt something. Or more appropriately, someone. Hunter was streaking my way. Well, not entirely my way. He seemed to be heading for his old house, just a few streets away from me.
I took a step in his direction, and Dad moved in front of me. “Nika…” he said, his voice low and full of warning. He could feel Hunter, too, and he didn’t want me running off to him.
Not able to resist Hunter being so close to me, I jumped over the railing, and took off for Hunter’s old place. I felt Julian’s concern instantly spike, felt Dad following immediately after me, and Mom following just after him. I ignored them all, though; I was too close to Hunter to turn back now.
Mom and Dad were right behind me when I rushed up the steps and twisted the handle to the abandoned house. It was locked, as expected, but I was riled up enough that I did something I normally never would have done. I leaned my shoulder into the wood and easily broke the frame. Dad growled his irritation and grabbed my elbow. “We need to leave, Nika. You can’t go in there.”
I yanked my arm free and put a foot inside. “It’s Hunter,” I whispered, well aware that Hunter could hear me, could feel me. “I need to see him, Dad. Please.” I looked between my parents, begging them to let me do this.
Dad looked back at Mom, then let out a weary exhale. “Fine, but we’re coming with you.”
I wasn’t surprised, so I didn’t protest. Being as quiet as I could be, I walked into the entryway. “Hunter?” Nothing but silence answered me. “Please…don’t leave.” My heart thudded in my chest as I turned to the hallway, where I could feel him. One of the bedroom lights was on, but the house was stone-silent.
I took a cautious step forward, but froze in my tracks when the light from the bedroom suddenly snapped off, and the house went pitch-black. My nerves spiked, and I started to tremble. Hunter was in there, I could feel him. I was sure I had nothing to worry about—Hunter wouldn’t hurt me—but a sliver of fear went up and down my spine as I inched my way down the hallway toward the bedroom; Julian’s mood shifted in response. Like my parents, he didn’t like this.
Recalling the empty spot on the mantel where Hunter’s sister’s urn once lied, I wondered if that was why he was here. If so, I could help him. “Hunter? Are you here for your sister’s ashes? Because I have them. I’m keeping them safe for you.”
A figure suddenly emerged from the bedroom and stepped in front of me; his bulk blocked my path. Startled at the sudden movement, I gasped and retreated a step. I ran into my parents behind me, and Dad protectively shifted me behind him.
A pair of brightly glowing eyes stared at me in the darkness. The light emanating from them was peaceful, tranquil, and I felt my body relaxing as I stared into the dark eyes behind the glow, eyes that I loved. Hunter’s hypnotic gaze broke apart from me to take in Mom and Dad. The glow emanating from my father’s eyes highlighted Hunter’s face; a small, smug smile was across his lips.
Leaning forward, he met my eyes again. “Your heart is racing, Nika. I can hear it. Are you frightened of me?”
As if to prove to me that I should be, he dropped his fangs. They were shocking to see on the human I loved. But then again, Hunter wasn’t human anymore. Realizing his display was mainly an act, I worked my way around my father. Dad clasped my shoulder. “He’s dangerous, Nika,” Dad whispered.
Hunter chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest. Fangs still down, he raised his eyebrows in question. Was I brave enough to talk to him without my bodyguards around? Looking over at Dad, I paused a moment to let the hypnotic effect of his eyes calm me down. The phosphorescent glow was the one aspect of vampirism that my brother and I didn’t have. It was one less thing we didn’t have to hide, although, at times like these, it did come in handy.
Feeling at peace, I smiled and patted Dad’s stubbled cheek. “I’ll be fine. He won’t hurt me.”
As I stepped forward, Hunter murmured, “Are you sure? You smell…amazing.” He intentionally took a long inhale, closing his eyes as he appreciated my aroma.
Not buying the act anymore, not when I knew the truth about him, I stepped right in front of him, almost toe-to-toe. “Don’t act like you’re going to bite me. I already know that you won’t eat unless blood is exposed to the air.” I indicated my scarred shoulder. “And I’m all healed up now.”
Hunter opened his glowing eyes. The light narrowed at me as I called his bluff. “Where’s my sister?” he immediately asked.
The loss of our passionate relationship made me ache. I never thought we’d end up this way. “She’s safe. She’s with me.”
Hunter sniffed. “I want her back.” As an afterthought, he added, “Please.”
I nodded. Examining his face, I saw the weariness in his eyes, the haggardness in his features. He really was starving himself. I couldn’t imagine the torture he was putting himself through. I couldn’t imagine his pain, his guilt, his self-hatred. If he could just accept what he was, we might still have a chance.
He watched me as I watched him, and the light of his eyes lulled me into a complete calm. Even though a warning in the back of my head screamed at me, I reached up and put a hand on his cheek. “Are you okay?” I asked, my voice soft. Hunter froze as his eyes locked onto my wrist. His already lowered fangs grew just a bit longer as the blood pumping through my veins stirred the animal within him. Seeing his eyes dancing with interest, Dad growled a warning.
Remembering what I was dealing with, a newborn, half-starved vampire, I quickly pulled my hand away. Hunter’s eyes followed my wrist, but he didn’t make any threatening moves so Dad didn’t tackle him, and I was sure he wanted to. Shaking his head a little, Hunter grumbled, “No, Nika, I’m not okay.” Eyes hard, he added, “I’m a monster. He turned me into a monster.”
“Hunter, no, you’re not a—”
He cut off my feeble attempt to comfort him. “He should have let me die in that church.” Clenching his jaw, he shook his head. “He should have done his job and staked me the moment I changed. Instead he ran away…like a coward.” His eyes shifted away from me, the glow softly lighting the bedroom he’d stepped out of.
Not sure if I should, I put a hand on his arm. His eyes immediately returned to mine. “Your dad loves you. He couldn’t stand the thought of losing you.”
Cocking his head, Hunter absorbed my features as he spoke in a soft voice. “He did lose me, Nika. I’m not human anymore. And Dad understood that. It’s why he took off. He left me, Nika. He abandoned me. Because I’m…a walking disease. A blight on humanity.”
His eyes filled with dark red tears. The pain in his silent heart was crystal clear to me, even though he was trying to hide it under his vampirism. This was killing him. Tears stinging my eyes, I grabbed his cheeks again. “No, no, you’re not. Being a vampire doesn’t change who you are. You can still be that wonderful boy I fell in love with…” My throat closed as I held him inches from me. I could feel Dad take a step toward me, on high alert since I was so close to him.
Face forlorn, Hunter didn’t seem too interested in the pulse pounding right next to his mouth. “I will never be anything but a beast, Nika. She should let me die.” A tear of blood rolled down his cheek.
I stepped into his body, needing to ease his pain. I heard Dad whisper my name, but I ignored him. I felt Julian’s concern rising, as he wondered what I was doing, but I pushed it back. Hunter was in pain…he needed me. “She?” I asked, as I wiped the blood from his skin.
He looked down at how closely I was standing to him. “Your grandmother…Halina.” His eyes returned to mine, irritation overriding his despair. “She won’t leave me alone.” Face twisting into a grimace, he grumbled, “I’m surprised she’s let me go for this long. She’s always hovering around me, watching over me…forcing me to feed.” He sighed, exasperated. “It’s…frustrating. I just want to be alone, but I’m…drawn to her, drawn to the monster who made me.”
Swallowing the tiny ache of jealousy that flared up, I released my hands from his cheeks. “It’s the bond. She sired you, so you’re…linked.”
His beautiful eyes got a faraway look. “For how long?” he whispered.
I hesitated, enjoying this fact about as much as Hunter was going to. “The bond is permanent, Hunter.” His eyes closed for a moment but his face was still lit by the light emanating from my parents. Seeing his grief, I rubbed his shoulder. “But the desire to be around each other will fade within a year or two. After that, you’ll only be aware of her presence in your mind.”
Reopening his eyes, he pulled his fangs back up. “It’s so odd to know where she is. “He lifted his hand and pointed in her direction without looking. Since I could feel her that way too, I smiled. “It’s odd to feel…where you all are.” He tilted his head at me, like he was mystified by feeling me and seeing me. I could understand why. If I hadn’t been born with this bond, I’d probably find it weird too.
“It’s the blood…you share our family’s blood, so you’re linked to us now. We’re connected,” I said with an encouraging smile; I wanted him to see the good parts of this, not just the bad. “You’re family now, Hunter. Forever.”
A genuine smile ghosted his lips, but it was gone instantly. “I never wanted this life,” he muttered.
Clenching his shoulder, I nodded. “I know…and I’d like to help you through it, if you’ll let me.” Ducking down, I searched his glum face.
“I don’t think you can, Nika,” he finally whispered. His eyes were guilty when he looked back up at me. “I don’t want to hurt anybody…” pausing, he inhaled a deep breath, and his fangs crashed back down, “but you smell so freaking good.”
The sadness on his face broke my heart, and I wanted to reach up and comfort him. I couldn’t though. Taking his words as a threat, Dad yanked me back into the safety of his arms. Wrapped in his chilly protection, I felt his chest release a hair-raising growl. Eyes slightly wild, Hunter glowered at my father and let his own rumble fill the night. The tension in the air made Mom grab me from Dad’s arms and pull me back a step.
Just as I started to fear that my boyfriend and my father were going to start ripping each other to shreds, Hunter blinked. Shuddering, he closed his eyes and focused on controlling his emotions. When he reopened them, he was more composed. “I wasn’t going to harm her.”
Dad relaxed when he saw that Hunter was in control again. Shaking his head, he told him, “You don’t know what you may or may not do right now, Hunter. You’re starving yourself. That makes you unpredictable.”
Hunter raised his chin in defiance. “I won’t kill.”
Dad sighed. Walking over to Hunter, he cautiously extended a hand. “And you don’t have to. Nika’s right, you’re family now, and we can help you live without killing…if you let us.”
Hunter looked down at Dad’s peace offering. He started to extend his own hand, but Halina’s presence began streaking our way. Hunter’s head shot up to glare in her direction. Dropping his hand, he returned his gaze to Dad’s. “I’m fine on my own.” He looked past Dad to me. “But I do want my sister back.”
Tears leaking down my cheeks, I nodded. “I’ll get her to you, I promise.”
Hunter backed up a step. His face was torn; he wanted to run from Halina and run toward her at the same time. When he backed up to the end of the hall, I jostled around my parents. Dad grabbed my hand at the last minute, but I jerked free. Blurring to Hunter, I tossed my arms around him. “I love you,” I whispered in his ear.
He stiffened, then embraced me. His ice-cold body melted into my heat, and a sob broke free from me at the joy I felt being in his arms again. It had been so long since we’d held each other. The simple times, when we were only hiding our relationship because of Hunter’s age, seemed like a lifetime ago.
Burying his head in my neck, I heard Hunter take a large inhale, then felt his arms around me tighten. I tensed, immediately remembering that things between us weren’t so simple anymore. I was now a source of food to a very hungry animal. Hungry and tormented. His mouth rested near my jugular, and I prepared myself to push him away. Unlike a human victim, I wasn’t exactly weak. My vampire-enhanced abilities might not be as strong as Hunter’s, but I could put up a decent fight.
Hunter ran his nose up my neck, still inhaling me. Just as I felt my dad move, Hunter released me and fled into the night. I darted to the window he’d escaped from. Leaning my head out, I searched the inky night for him. He was gone, though, already vanished from my vision, and I dropped my head, defeated.
The three of us slowly made our way back home. Halina joined up with us right outside the Bavarian beauty. Leaning against the porch railing, she shook her head of long, wild hair. “That boy is going to give me an ulcer.” She grunted and brought her hand to her temple. “I already have a headache.”
Mom put a sympathetic arm around my waist as Dad told Halina, “He doesn’t seem to want to be around anyone. He thinks he can do it on his own.”
Halina sighed and pushed away from the railing. The short dress she was wearing showed more thigh than Mom would ever let me show. I didn’t think I’d even be allowed to wear a nightgown that short. “He is stubborn beyond comprehension. He makes raising you seem easy.”
Dad smirked at her, then indicated the house. “I’m sure he’ll be fine for a while. Why don’t you come inside?” Walking up to her, he threw an arm around her shoulders. “It’s been forever since you’ve visited.”
Halina’s eyes were torn as she looked at Dad, then Mom and me. She clearly wanted to keep running after Hunter. Her gaze swung south, to where Hunter had run off. I searched that direction, wanting to see him, but knowing I wouldn’t. He was too far gone, and he clearly didn’t want to come back…yet.
Bringing her eyes back to Dad’s, Halina smiled and looped her arm around his waist. “All right. For a time.” She grimaced and added, “Gabriel is visiting Starla and Jacen anyway. This will give me an excuse to not have to make an appearance over there.” She let out an exasperated groan. “That woman drives me crazy.”
I contained my smile. Starla was more like my grandmother than she would ever admit.
After visiting with Halina for a bit, I excused myself and trudged upstairs. Arianna tried to go with me, shooing Julian away and telling him that she needed “BFF time,” but I didn’t let her comfort me; I just wanted to be alone. How I had gone from being alone and positive that I would never find love, to being alone and positive that I would never find love again was beyond me.
I heard the tip tap of claws on the floor and looked up to see Spike shuffle into the room. The old pup stopped at my feet and stared up at me with milky eyes. Reaching down, I lifted him onto the bed with me. He curled into my side and was almost instantly asleep. I stroked his fur as he wheezed in my arms. Well, I supposed I wasn’t completely alone. Unlike Hunter, who was literally alone tonight, I was surrounded by beloved family members.
Later, after Arianna drove herself home, Julian came upstairs to check on me. I felt his concern for me long before I saw him. Leaning against the doorframe, he crossed his arms over his chest as he watched me. Looking up at my brother, I saw a peacefulness in his features that I hadn’t ever seen before. His pale eyes were sympathetic, but happy at the same time. He’d found what he was searching for. I thought I had too, but, things hadn’t exactly worked out that way.
He walked over to me, sitting on the other side of Spike. Our pet let out a contented exhale as he snuggled between us. Reaching over him, Julian grabbed my hand. He didn’t ask how I was since he already knew I was feeling pretty low and pretty confused. Instead, he indicated the TV tucked in the corner of my room. “Want to watch a movie?”
I smiled at the distraction he presented. “Yeah…nothing romantic though.”
He made a sour face. “That would be about the last thing I’d pick.” Grabbing the remote beside the bed, he turned the set on and started flipping through channels. “I was thinking more along the lines of guns and violence.” He paused, his face speculative. “On second thought, how about a comedy?”
Relaxing back into my pillows, I nodded my agreement. “Yeah, something funny sounds good.” We’d both had enough violence to last a very long time.
Mom and Dad caught up downstairs with Halina, while Julian and I watched an eighties comedy about a girl trying to pass herself off as a boy. We both laughed out loud, and our emotions evened out. I nodded off to sleep long before the movie was over. When I woke up, it was still dark outside, but dawn was fast approaching. I was alone in my bed; Julian was snoring away in his. I was tucked under the covers, probably by my mom. Halina’s presence was far away from me, back toward the ranch. She must have finally gone home to visit her daughter and granddaughter. Mom and Dad were in their soundproof bedroom. Even Spike was absent. He had probably plodded after Mom when she’d tucked me in.
Feeling grimy, since I hadn’t brushed my teeth or washed my face, I tossed the covers aside and stood up. That was when my tired mind finally realized something I should have realized immediately—I wasn’t alone. A dark figure was standing beside the window, a figure I could see…and feel. Hunter. He was standing in such a way that the streetlamp outside dulled the glow of his vampire eyes, eyes that were relentlessly staring at me.
Startled, I backed up a step. It wasn’t every day that you woke up to find someone watching over you as you slept. Recovering quickly, I took a step toward him. “Hunter?” My eyes flashed to the grayness outside; dawn would be here within the hour. “What are you doing here? You should be somewhere safe.”
His eyes followed my gaze. “I hate running from the sun,” he muttered.
Wondering just how deep his melancholy was, I stepped up to him and put a hand on his arm; his body was like steel under his jacket, cold and unyielding. “You have to. You’ll die if you don’t.” He looked back to me as my voice grew tight. “And I don’t want you to die.”
A sad expression crossed his face as his eyes searched mine. I wanted him to lean down and kiss me. I wanted to feel the tenderness of his lips, the coarseness of his stubble. But more than all of that, I wanted him to smile. He didn’t, though; he merely said, “I already died, Nika.”
I brought my hand to his face, caressing the stubble along his jaw that I missed so much. The light from the lamp highlighted his undead features, and I thought he’d never looked more attractive. His eyes drifted to my exposed wrist before shifting back to my face. “I’m so sorry this happened to you,” I whispered. “But please don’t give up.”
He pulled back from me, and looked down at something in his hands. I removed my hand from his skin and looked down at what he held. A black-as-night urn was in his palms. In the faded light of the room, my enhanced sight could see the outline of bloody vampire fangs that extended from the top. Recalling that his sister’s urn was a rosy granite color, I felt my heart fill with lead. “What is that, Hunter?”
Sighing, he lifted it up and tilted it so I could see the name engraved on it—his own. “It’s tradition in my family, when a hunter dies, their urn is marked with fangs…in honor of their commitment to the cause.” His tone grew harsh, bitter. His hand tightened around the urn, and for a moment, I thought he might throw it through the wall; that would certainly wake up my snoring brother.
Calming himself, Hunter handed it to me. “I want you to keep it. Store it next to my sister’s.”
My eyes filling, I numbly took the cold marble from his icy fingers. I couldn’t speak; I had no words. A trace of a smile drifted over Hunter’s features, and he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. Like before, the smile faded instantly. “Keep my sister safe for me, okay?”
I nodded, then found my voice. “I thought you wanted her with you?”
His eyes drifted to my closet, to where his sister’s ashes were resting. “I don’t deserve her company,” he said in a low voice.
Not sure how to comfort him, or if I even could, I held his urn in one hand and reached out for him with the other. He was through my open window in a flash. A ghost image of him was still in my watery eyes as I gazed at the spot where he’d vanished from me…again. Not knowing what else to say or do, I whispered, “I’ll keep her safe for you, until you’re ready to be reunited.”
I listened for any sort of response, but I only heard the garbage trucks in the distance. Sighing, I started to close the window. A gust of chilly wind billowed into the room, stirring my lacy curtains. Faintly, in the breeze, I heard Hunter’s voice, and hearing it gave me hope—for him and for us.
“I love you, too, Nika.”
I smiled as I looked out into the night. Hunter had a long way to go to acceptance, but I would help him get there…if he’d let me.