Boulder
When Laura came out she nodded politely to me.
“How did it go?” I asked.
“Fine. I find Christina very interesting,” Laura responded.
“But what did she say?”
“We spoke about marriage and she had questions for me.”
I stepped closer to her and was happy Magni wasn’t there to stop me. “What kind of questions?”
“Intimate questions.”
“Like what?” My eyes were boring into hers as I wished I could read her mind.
The door opened and both Laura and I turned our heads to see Christina standing in the doorway with a hand on her hip.
“If you want to know what I said, why don’t you ask me?”
Laura looked a little surprised by Christina’s tone with me, but she hurried along while I faced my new wife.
“Are you coming?” she asked and opened the door.
I didn’t like her running the show and had felt like a fool waiting outside my new bride’s room when everyone would be expecting me to be busy with her inside. I knew very well that women from the Motherlands oppressed men for a pastime, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to let her do that to me.
“How about we go for a walk instead?” I asked to regain control. Surely, she wouldn’t fight with me in public, and we’d been cooped up in that room for too long anyway.
“All right,” she said and stepped out in the large hallway. “A walk in the garden then?”
“Yes.” I swung my arm for her to follow me.
We didn’t talk much in the beginning, her staccato steps indicating that she was still upset and unwilling to look at me.
“Do you regret your choice?” I finally asked.
“What choice? I didn’t have a choice,” she said sourly.
“You could have stuck with Archer.”
“And been pregnant within a month,” she scoffed. “I don’t think so! He would have taken me to get inseminated next week if he had anything to say.”
I wondered what she meant by that, but left it for now.
Five more minutes of walking in silence and we reached a water fountain. “Just so we’re clear,” she said. “I object to being married.”
“Why?”
“Because it suppresses women,” she said and folded her arms and looked away.
“How the hell did you come to that brain-dead conclusion?” I asked.
That made her spin around, and for someone from the Motherlands I knew she had to be fuming on the inside when she sneered through gritted teeth. “In case you didn’t know this: men dominated and mistreated women for thousands of years. There was a time when women were the property of men and practically treated like slaves. They had no power, no voice, and could be raped by their husband without anyone to help them.”
I chuckled. “Whoever wrote your history books must have been poorly informed. That’s all lies made up by women.”
“It’s true,” she said and lifted her chin.
“No, it’s not. Women were never property to men. They were highly cherished members of society. And a father protected his daughter until he carefully chose a man worthy of protecting her for him.”
“Maybe in some cases,” she admitted. “But where I come from, women don’t need men to protect them. And you’re missing the point. If women were so cherished then why weren’t they allowed to have a political vote or have a profession?”
“You’re talking about something that happened thousands of years ago.”
“No, I’m not; women only gained basic rights within the last five hundred years.”
“You don’t know that for sure. And it doesn’t change that you have an obscure way of looking at males as the evil ones, when we’re anything but.”
“You almost ruined the world,” she blamed me in a harsh whisper.
I squared my shoulders and narrowed my eyes, feeling extremely tired of her feminist shit. “No, I did not ruin the world and I will not take the blame for what men did hundreds of years ago. You’re a historian, so why don’t we take a look at all the horrible things women did throughout history? If you think women are any better than men, then you’re naïve.”
“Can you point to one female dictator?” I defended myself.”
“Don’t be stupid. Dictators are always linked to military power, and women never came to power that way. Female prime ministers and queens could be just as heartless and brutal as any man. There was no difference.”
“Only because they were navigating a male-dominated world. They had to be tough.”
I buried my hands in my pockets and rocked on my feet. “Women are fully capable of murdering or taking advantage of others. Just like men. It’s human nature!”
“No, it’s not,” Christina protested. “I think the Motherlands have showed that we’ve evolved beyond such appalling behavior.”
“Or maybe you’re so strongly regulated and controlled that you never get the chance to explore the darker part of your personality,” I provoked her. “My point is just that I refuse to take the blame for the men who mistreated women in the past. I can’t imagine it was the norm at any point in time, and if it was then I’m happy to tell you that we men have evolved since our ancestors.”
“Have you?” her voice was seething. “You still kill for greed.”
I clenched my jaws.
“The only reason all those men fought in the tournament was greed,” she claimed. “You want more. Men always want more.”
“That’s not true.”
“Really? So they weren’t motivated by the million-dollar reward or the prestige that came along with it?”
“Some of us did it for honor and to protect you.”
She gave me a long hard look. “Can you truly say you did it to protect me?”
Our gazes clashed. “Yes!” I said loud and clear.
That left her silent.
“You have all these ridiculous ideas about men being women’s adversaries, but we’re not. We’re meant to live together, that should be fucking obvious.” I couldn’t hide the frustration I felt. “You speak of marriage as something awful but I’ve read stories describing love between men and women. And passion.”
“The forbidden books,” she breathed.
“Yes, Christina. People used to fall in love and marry because they couldn’t stand the thought of being separated. They were partners, mates… do you understand?”
“That’s not what I’ve heard.”
“Well, did it occur to you that you might not know everything and that there’s a reason those books are forbidden?”
“They are forbidden because they create unwanted emotions in people and in some cases depression,” Christina explained.
“Yeah, I can relate,” I said and raised her chin to make her look at me. “But it’s only because reading those books will make you long for how it used to be between men and women, I always wanted to experience it, but we’re cut off from the women living in the Motherlands and even if we could go there, you’ve all been brainwashed to think of love and passion as something wrong.”
“We have love,” Christina defended. “I feel great love and affection for my friends.”
“I’m not talking about that kind of love.” I took her hand and lifted it to my heart. “I’m talking about the passionate kind between a man and a woman.”
For a second we stood close, her hand on my chest and my hand over hers.
“Remember when you called me your friend? And when you ran into my arms at the ceremony?”
“Yes.”
“Doesn’t that tell you something?”
“What?”
I sighed, annoyed that she couldn’t see what I was seeing. “You trust me and you feel safe with me.”
She pulled back a little. “I wouldn’t say that.”
“Then what would you say then?”
“That of all my options at that time you were the least frightening.”
I let go of her and started walking again. She followed me in silence toward the Gray Mansion and remained quiet after that.
The situation was awkward. We’d been together day and night for days and had talked and learned from each other, but now she was closed off to me. I treated her like I would treat a distrustful animal and advanced slowly.
It was only nine thirty when she went to bed. “What are you doing?” she asked when I joined her.
“I’m tired too. It’s been a long day and fighting Nelson took a lot out of me.”
“But you sleep on the couch,” she said and pulled the cover to her nose.
“Not anymore,” I said and made myself comfortable next to her.
“Don’t think we’ll be having sex,” she said quickly.
I turned on my right side, facing her, and arranging my pillow while trying to find a comfortable position for my broken arm and a solution to my predicament. I wanted to move slowly so as not to scare her, but I also couldn’t give in to her idea that we would never have sex.
“Is it because you’re afraid of hurting my arm?” I finally asked.
“No,” she said quickly. “It’s because I don’t like the idea of sex at all.”
“You’ll get used to it,” I said, “And if it’s any consolation I’m a virgin too.”
Christina held up a palm. “I’m going to stop you right there. You might as well get the notion of our having sex out of your mind, because it will never happen. If I wanted sex I could have stayed with Archer.”
“But you didn’t,” I stated. “You married me and you are now my wife.”
She shot me a dirty look. “It’s a practical arrangement only.”
I ignored that comment and asked a question of my own. “Don’t men and women have sex in the Motherlands?”
She shrugged. “I suppose some do. I have friends who are coupled. Theresa and Dan have been together for years, but I never see them touch each other, and most people live in community buildings where we share meals but have our own rooms. I live with Kya.”
I scrunched my face. “You live with a woman?”
“Yeah.”
“Is she your lover?”
“No!” Her answer came quickly and then she gave me a curious smile. “Kya is my best friend. Why? Do you have sex with any of your friends?”
I shook my head. “No – I mean, sure we experimented when we were teens, but I can honestly say that I fantasize about women only – I’ve just never been with a real woman,” I elaborated.
“Whoa, whoa, slow down. What do you mean you experimented when you were teens?”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “Nothing.”
“Is that normal?” she asked like she was onto something profound. “For teenage boys to experiment sexually? Do men experiment too?”
I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “I don’t know what other men do, and I’m not in the mood to entertain you with my teenage memories.”
“Just tell me if you…” She trailed off, unable to ask the obvious question.
“No,” I said.
“No, you didn’t, or no, you don’t want to answer the question,” she asked.
“Christina, just let it go.” I sighed.
“No, I’m trying to understand the culture among Nmen, and you just gave me a very interesting piece of information.”
“What? That teenage boys are constantly horny and experimenting? That’s hardly groundbreaking research right there. It’s been like that since the beginning of mankind. I don’t think we were any different than generations before us.”
“But what did you do?”
I looked away. “The usual.”
“And what would that be?”
“You really want to know?” I puffed up my pillow again and liked that I was in the same bed as her and not on the sofa.
“Yes, I’m very curious,” she whispered.
“We masturbated together, compared sizes, some of the guys jerked each other off; others did more, but I wasn’t one of them.”
Her face was completely flushed and she was watching me so intensely that it felt intimate between us.
“So you never?” she asked.
I waited for her to speak the words but again, she couldn’t.
“Did I fuck another guy?”
Her breathing stopped for a moment.
“Does it matter?” I asked.
“No!” She blinked. “No, of course not, I’m just trying to understand how society works in the Northlands.”
“I already told you, I wasn’t one of the guys who did more, but I don’t judge the ones who did. It wasn’t like they could have a girlfriend, and sex-bots weren’t on the menu very often.”
“So you’ve had sex with sex-bots,” she asked.
“Of course. Lots. You have sex centers too, right?” I asked.
“Yes,” she said, low. “We have physical centers where you go to take care of your physical needs. The one close to me is pretty big. There’s a gym, a spa, a hairdresser, a nail salon, all sorts of physical therapy and healing places, a medical clinic and a pleasure parlor with sex-bots.”
“How practical,” I said dryly. “And how often do you go?”
“It’s recommended to go twice a month, so that’s what I do.”
“Okay.” I placed my hand between our pillows and noticed that she wasn’t shielding herself with the cover anymore. “I go a few times a week.”
“You have sex several times a week?” she asked in a disbelieving whisper.
“Uh-huh, if you count the times I have sex with the sex-bots. If you count the times I have sex with myself it’s…”
“You don’t have to tell me that,” she cut me off, color rising in her cheeks again.
“It’s fine. I’m not shy about masturbating. Every healthy man does it at least once a day.”
Her eyes widened. “They do?”
“Yes. How often do women masturbate?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never asked my friends so I can only speak for myself.”
“So?” I asked.
She wrinkled her nose, and it made the cutest expression on her face. “That’s private,” she said with a smile of embarrassment.
“Just give me a rough estimate. Once a day, once a week, what?”
Christina raised her head up and supported it with a hand. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation but in the spirit of mutual curiosity I’ll answer you honestly.” She took a deep breath. “For me it varies. Sometimes I can go weeks without and other times it’s several times a week.”
“Really?” I smiled. “So we’re not so different. And what do you find arousing?” I asked her. “I’m curious because you said that you’ve never met a man that arouses you, and you just admitted that you’re not aroused by women either, so what turns you on?”
The color of her face told me this was a difficult subject but I admired her for not backing down. “Mostly things from the past. Things I’ve read or movie clips I’ve seen.”
“Like what?”
“Like…” She played with a lock of her hair. “People kissing and such.”
“Kissing turns you on?” I gave her my most charming smile and moved my hand closer.
She didn’t move.
“Did it turn you on when I kissed you?”
“It was too quick for me to really feel much,” she said pragmatically.
“That’s because you pulled away.”
“You surprised me.”
“Can I kiss you now?” I asked and touched her hand while moving closer. “I promise I won’t do anything but kiss you.”
Christina looked undecided when I slowly leaned in and kissed her. This time she didn’t pull away but she didn’t kiss me back either.
Carefully caressing her face, I deepened my kiss and felt her respond a little.
Enough, a voice of reason said in the back of my mind while parts of me wanted to roll on top of her and sink myself inside her.
I pulled back and looked at her. “How was that?”
Christina touched her lips and drew a deep breath as if suddenly remembering that she had to breathe.
“That was…”
“What?”
“I don’t know.”
“Then maybe I need to do it aga…” I was already kissing her again and letting my hand slide up and down her arm, getting closer to her breast. This time she raised her arm and touched my shoulder, which made instant heat spread down my spine. It was all the acceptance I needed to do what I’d always wanted to try. My fingers weaved into her hair and when my hand was behind her neck, I opened my mouth and licked her upper lip. Her eyes had been closed but they flew open and she gasped, opening her mouth just enough for me to enter and touch her tongue with mine. I’m sure she would have pulled back if she could, but my hand was in position to keep her in place and I didn’t budge. I had read about French kissing and longed to experience what it would feel like.
Christina
You can’t be an archeologist if you’re not curious by nature. By definition you’re digging to find secrets and understand how people used to live. I had come to the Northlands in the hope of finding a library full of information. Instead I was experiencing with my own body what I had never known in my own life. Boulder was like a time traveler who didn’t know what living in the year 2437 meant. He broke laws every day with his improper use of language and disregard for my warnings not to read emotionally provocative books, but then, the laws didn’t apply to the Nmen, who had their own set of rules to live by.
My first reaction when I was forced to marry Boulder was to have him take me to the border. The only reason I didn’t ask him was the thought of all the “I told you so” comments I would be facing back home and the fact that there was still so much more to learn from this place.
Boulder wasn’t the monster of an Nman I’d been warned against. He wasn’t pinning me down and forcing his will on me, and his raw masculinity didn’t frighten me as it had in the beginning.
I had let him kiss me out of curiosity and now his tongue playfully touched mine like an invitation to a dance. It was highly unhygienic of course, but I’d read about this old custom and knew that some couples still did it in private. Lara Croft wouldn’t shy away from a hands-on experience like this and neither would Indiana Jones. I could be brave like them and see it as an experiment.
Slowly I pushed back against his tongue with my own, circling it, and starting a new and exciting dance of ours. Boulder tightened his grip on the back of my head and lifted his broken arm up before he rolled on top of me. I didn’t mean our kiss to get this far, but I didn’t stop him either when he pushed my legs apart with his knees, while still kissing me.
It’s okay, he’s wearing pajama pants and I have my long t-shirt and underwear on; nothing is going to happen, I calmed myself.
“It feels so good,” Boulder moaned into my mouth and ground himself against me.
He’s hard! The thought both frightened and excited me, and I couldn’t decide if my body was burning hot because of all the heat he was throwing off or because the situation aroused me. I’d fantasized about being in a situation like this, but not with someone like him.
“Remember we’re not going to have sex,” I said to make sure we were on the same page.
“Uh-huh,” he said and kissed my jaw.
Growing bolder, I let my hands explore his strong torso and didn’t protest when he pulled his t-shirt over his head. I’d never seen him topless and was fascinated by his hard muscles.
He tugged at my t-shirt, silently asking me to take it off, but I shook my head and was grateful when he didn’t pressure me further.
Boulder planted kisses down my neck, my jawline, my nose and I got the feeling he was exploring like me. And all the while he was grinding against me, simulating intercourse.
“Ahh!” I couldn’t help the small eruption of a moan because it felt good.
“You like it?” he whispered into my ear and gently bit my earlobe.
“A little,” I admitted.
“And this?” he asked and took me by surprise when he lifted my thighs around his waist and made a long circular movement with his hips. Tingles and moist heat spread in my lower parts and my breathing became faster. He looked enormous, towering over me with eyes full of lust.
“I want you so fucking bad, Christina,” he growled and pressed against me, holding himself up on his elbows.
For a long moment, we looked into each other’s eyes and I knew he was silently asking me to make love to him, but that was a whole different experiment that I wasn’t ready for.
“I like kissing,” I said and gave him a small smile.
“Me too.” He touched my nose with his and pressed another kiss to my lips and slowly, while holding our gazes locked, he pulled back and slid his hand under my t-shirt. The feel of his hand on my naked skin was forbidden, and felt so different from my own touch when he slid it over my thigh, my hip, my belly and finally made a sound in his throat when he cupped my right breast. “A perfect handful,” he muttered and kissed me again. “One day, I’ll kiss your nipple and bury my head between your breasts.”
I opened my mouth to protest but he cut me off with another kiss and released my breast. “Don’t say anything,” he muttered against me, and from the way he was breathing harder and moving faster I knew he had accepted that this was as far as I’d let him go.
Boulder was making love to me on my conditions. He wasn’t inside me but he was grinding himself against me and moving up and down my body while we were kissing.
“Fuck,” he said and pumped harder, pressing my legs further apart and grunting into my ear. “You’re my wife, and soon I’m gonna fuck you so hard.”
His words freaked me out, but with his large body pressing me into the mattress and his state of arousal I couldn’t do much. Fortunately, it only took a few seconds before he stiffened and leaned his head back roaring “Fuuuuck, yes.”
I pushed at him then and was relieved when he rolled onto his back away from me.
“What did you do? Why did you scream like that?”
Boulder had his eyes closed and was panting. His broken arm resting on his chest and the other on his forehead.
I looked down at myself and noticed a wet spot on my front and then my eyes flew to his pants. He had a large wet spot in front too. At first I was confused because I’d never experienced a male sex-bot behave like Boulder just did, but then I realized what had just happened. “You ejaculated.”
He replied with a deep exhale.
“I’ve learned about this in school. Men have a component needed to create babies, and they take it to fertility clinics where women ready to take on the role of motherhood will receive that gift.”
Boulder opened his eyes and turned his head to look at me. “Children are supposed to be a creation of love,” he said. “I read that in a book and I like to imagine I too was a creation of love.”
“Of course you were,” I said quickly. “We grow up with dedicated parents who care very much about us, and even Nboys are loved fiercely while they’re with us. I guarantee that your mother and other adults showered you with love and care before you left the Motherlands”
“I don’t remember, but one thing is for sure, Christina,” he said and got up from the bed. “Now you know.”
“Know what?”
“What kissing feels like.”
I sat up too and pulled my knees to my chest. “That thing you said, you didn’t really mean it, did you?”
“What thing?” He walked to a closet and picked out a new pair of pants.
“The last thing, about me being your wife and you wanting to do a certain thing to me.”
“What? Oh… that.” Boulder scratched his head. “That’s just dirty talk.”
“Dirty talk?”
“Yeah, you know, something you say when you’re horny.”
I closed my eyes taking a deep breath. “I know what horny means,” I said. “But does that mean you didn’t mean it?”
He chuckled and came closer. “Are you asking me if I would like to fuck you hard?”
“No.” I looked away.
“Hey,” he sat down on the bed next to me. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Just tell me you didn’t mean it.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I really want to.”
My head snapped back and I stared at him with a defiant glance. “But I don’t!”
“Yet!” he said with a smug smile and got up. “I’ll be right back.”