WHAT HAD SHE DONE? Groaning, Chloe rolled over and covered her face with a pillow, pressing into it as she screeched. God. She left her sister’s memorial reception to have sex. Maybe not intentionally, but the end result was the same. And essentially, a one-night stand with someone she didn’t know. She might have been around Chet for years, but she certainly didn’t know him. Nothing about him or his personality. Did he have a short temper? Was he stupid? Smart? Strange? Kinky? A serial killer? An animal abuser? She had no idea about his disposition or character. It was weird for her to realize she had been around him daily for almost three years, and yet, had never really taken any notice of him. She was aware of what he looked like, and that he was crazy silent. He appeared to have a good relationship with his mom, which was a positive thing, considering they worked together. He didn’t talk to anyone else but his mom. Perhaps Chloe’s failure to address and interact with him, or even ignoring him wasn’t entirely her fault.

Where did all this come from? First, the unexpected kiss in her office and now this? Sex? Sex with her employee. How could she ever face him? Or work with him again? It’s not like she could fire him or request that he not return. Oh, no. There he’d be. She suddenly remembered she had to go in to work this week and sign the paychecks for him and everyone else, no matter what.

Why had she done this?

More importantly, why had he?

She couldn’t get a grip on it. Why, after all these years without any interaction or interest towards her, did he come after her in the bathroom that day? Why did he kiss her? Why did he come up to her today after first stopping by her car and getting her garage door opener? His intent was fully premeditated when he brought her home. Before he even approached her. How had he known? And why would he take it upon himself to do such a thing? Until then, they had no interactions at all. None. Nothing. Nada.

Maybe he just felt sorry for her. She hadn’t been exactly subtle in her grief. But for a man who rarely responded to anyone, why now? Why this? And why her?

Her thoughts swirled around her fogged, drugged, exhausted, grief-stricken brain, but no answers emerged. It simply tired her out more. She jerked the pillow out from under her head and pushed the covers back. Still naked, she grimaced as she remembered that she just had sex. Today. Before dinnertime even. Cringing and ashamed, she quickly started a shower and scrubbed herself free of Chet, her tears, and the day. She let the hot water pound down over her swollen eyelids and face. She opened her mouth and drank some of the water before drying off and slipping on an oversized sweatshirt and loose pants.

Now what?

Twilight lingered long into the August evening. She was too tired to care. She stared out at her small but tidy backyard. The flowers were all dying. Every year, she planted an array of perennials in the bark-covered beds. She was usually attentive about watering them, especially when the temperatures rose to the eighties and they hadn’t had any rain in over a month. But now, after nine days of neglect, they were wilted or even dead. Her lawn was also brown and other spots had grown far too long from lack of mowing. Who cared? She stared out numbly. All that once seemed so important and worthy of her time and energy just didn’t anymore. Not at all. Not for a moment.

She picked up her cell and called her mom. No one answered. She left a message, claiming her grief overtook her and she had to escape. Hanging up, she felt just as hollow, sad, and lost as she was two hours ago.

But two hours ago, she didn’t feel this alone.

She shook it off. There was no one left to call. Ryder would be with Tara. She scoffed. After what she said and did, there was no way Ryder would want to hear from her. She knew his decency and good manners would ensure that he would help her, although he wouldn’t want to be with her tonight. Her parents? God, no. It was so strained and awkward between the three of them. When they were alone, without Ryder and Wyatt there, it was like they couldn’t even sustain eye contact. Chloe winced, knowing it was because of her face. She was a walking reminder of their dead daughter. She wasn’t enough for them now. She couldn’t make up for that. It was a classic tragedy. It broke her heart when she realized they should be coming together in support of each other out of their shared grief, but perhaps this was too much to bear. She worried it might have just ripped them apart.

There were friends in the community. So many people knew Ebony and Chloe. Friends from school and later on from the café. But for some reason, no one’s name came to her mind that she knew well enough to call. No one would understand or welcome a random and unexpected call from her. What did she want anyway? She didn’t know. There were no words to articulate it. She was so sad. Nothing could make her feel better. But being all alone now made her feel even lonelier, as if she’d fallen off the earth and no one cared or noticed her absence.

She wasn’t sure she cared anymore. Living right now hurt so much. Somewhere inside her, she knew this was wrong and someone should have cared how sad she was. How lifeless she felt, and hollow and numb. She wished she weren’t here to deal with such a daunting burden. Shouldn’t someone notice she felt so bad? Shouldn’t someone have worried about her? Checked up on her? Tried to help her?

Excluding, of course, her freaking busboy. How strange that he was the one who did all those things and she still didn’t know what to make of it.

Chloe had no best friends because she’d had a built in best friend in her twin sister. Even after Ebony married Ryder, she remained an integral part of them. She was best friends with them. Then she and Ryder had stayed close after Ebony ditched them. So she hadn’t felt any need to pursue anyone else. How short-sighted. Now, Ryder had a romantic new love and no need for her.

How could she get through tonight? Tomorrow? Next week?

She grabbed the pack of sleeping pills, staring hard at them, and her hand shook. This pain was too much.

Her head pounded, but there was no one to call. No one who’d care.

No one.

The emptiness echoed through her.

She opened the bottle and shook out a few pills. Setting them inside her mouth, she swallowed. Please, just let me forget, fade out, and sleep.

And she did. She stayed on them for days at a time. Coming in and out of consciousness while lying in her bed or sleeping or stumbling around in a drugged stupor, she managed to escape a few phone calls from her mother by claiming exhaustion. Of course, her mother didn’t question it. She was probably drugged out too, and trying to figure out why she should continue breathing and living.

So Chloe faded from reality. She lost weight and didn’t sign the paychecks or even call the damn restaurant. She avoided Ryder altogether. He pounded on her front door on several different days. She didn’t answer.

She just zoned out. Floated. She loved not being there, and drifting nowhere.

Eventually, she roused herself and decided to sign a few paychecks for a change. She feared she could lose her staff at some point if she never showed up at all.

Throwing on some clothes, she barely pushed her ratty curls into a tight knot. She stumbled to the café and walked in. Everyone seemed thrilled to see her. The morning shift was over, but the lunch crowd would soon keep everyone busy. She smiled with little interest, and all of it was faked and forced before shutting the door to her office. Sitting down, she felt as if she just ran through a violent gauntlet by walking less than a hundred feet through a busy kitchen. Chet was there, washing dishes. His gaze made her feel hot but she ignored it, of course. She stared downwards. Why had she come here again? What was she planning to do?

Oh, yeah. Sign the paychecks.

She sighed while logging onto the computer and bringing up the accounting software. She could probably manage cutting the checks. Later, she could do all the paperwork and tax reporting for both state and federal, as well as all the other crap that consumed the bulk of her time.

She clicked on the computer screen and shook her head when she saw all the mistakes that kept plaguing her work.

All at once, her head jerked up. That voice. There it was in her kitchen.

Fucking Tara. Chloe seethed inside.

She slid her chair back and hopped to her feet while nearly jerking the door off its hinges.

There she was, talking to Tiana. Tiana was the cook and also Chloe’s aunt on her dad’s side. They got along but weren’t exactly bosom buddies. Now, she was betraying Chloe by appearing so friendly to the enemy.

“You’re fired, Tara Tamasy.”

Tara whipped around and her expression was no less than shocked. Oh yeah, the whiny, little bitch didn’t know that Chloe was back or that she’d know all the lies this venomous, little vamp had spread for almost a year now.

“Didn’t think I’d know, huh? Well, I do. I know about all your lying and scamming. But thankfully, unlike most, I don’t have to put up with it. I can respond by taking direct action. As owner of this establishment, I want you out of it.”

“Chloe, I’m sorry. Yes, I did lie about my last name and former work history, but please let me explain—”

If a giant red cape were suddenly flung over her eyes, Chloe would not have been surprised because she literally saw red. Explain? What did she intend to say? Convince stupid Chloe of all her lies? That she could somehow talk her way around them? How dare she? All that did was prove how entitled she felt since she was so used to getting her own way. Oh, yeah, Chloe soon discovered that sweet, harmless, little Tara was actually filthy rich. It was kind of a joke that she spent any of her time working as a server. What was she up to? Slumming it by working for Chloe’s place?

“Get out. Leave! I won’t have you here,” she interrupted Tara, yelling across the prep area. Tara jerked back at Chloe’s outburst. Stupid bitch. What did she think? That Chloe would never return? It was her restaurant. Besides the bitch fully lied, saying all kinds of shit on her employment application. Oh, yes, Chloe heard the rumors. That was courtesy of her mother. She knew now that Tara hadn’t even used her real name.

Chloe turned around after her tirade and threw herself down on her desk chair. There. Done. Bitch be gone. Bitch be dead, for all she cared.

“Hold it!” Suddenly, her office was filling up with people. Petra, Dok, Tiana, even Chet. He freaking was half a head taller than the rest. She kept her heated gaze away from him and directed her attention to Petra who was shuffling forward. Petra’s face was red, and her cheeks huffing as she called after Chloe.

“Just hold on, Tara!” Petra yelled over her shoulder. “You’re not leaving.”

Chloe rose to her feet, her gaze riveted in a glaring contest with Petra. “The hell she isn’t! I won’t have her here.”

“You will. Or you won’t have any staff,” Dok retorted.

What broke through the snarling and glaring was Dok’s soft, level voice. The whole staff shuffled into Chloe’s office, surrounding her desk as if they planned this mutiny. Chloe frowned and glowered at them all. Her mouth dropped open and she stared at her favorite employee. Dok was always calm, fair-minded, soft-spoken, and cooperative. She was a hard worker without ever trying to be contentious or rebellious. Dok held her gaze, raising her eyebrows up. She didn’t smile but she avoided giving Chloe the evil death stare as Petra did.

“What do you mean?” Chloe asked, feeling confused.

“If you fire her for no reason, we’ll all go too. It means we can’t trust you.” Chet spoke this time.

Chloe’s gaze lifted from Dok and Petra to Chet. He stood in the back, folding his arms over his chest. Chloe gulped and her gaze stayed riveted on his chest. Memories flashed through her mind of his naked chest as he pressed her against him. Temporarily, and much to her surprise, the image appeared in vivid detail, and instantly distracted her. She was never one to get bowled over by any sexual encounter. Now she couldn’t even look at her partner without feeling feverish.

His direct confrontation with her was the very first interaction since their unprecedented and totally inappropriate encounter. Her mouth hung open and her thoughts kept spinning. Then her jaw locked in fierce determination and her lips pursed as she grew angry. How dare he? How fucking dare he contradict her? The management and staff were entirely dependent upon her discretion. It was her café. She could do whatever she wanted with it. She could fire each and every one of them. She could shut it down, and declare bankruptcy. She could literally walk out today and let it flounder and fizzle. That could be her decision.

Because it was hers.

Honestly, it was all she had left in the world now. All that was left of her former life. All that she had to worry or care about. And she couldn’t tolerate Tara Tamasy being there and rubbing her horrible presence in her face. Now, her staff were essentially blackmailing her.

“No reason?” She held a long, intense, heated eye lock with Chet. The first since it happened. “I have every damn reason. She lied. Her name was fake. Her Social Security number was a fraudulent one.”

Chet kept his expression neutral without even a flicker of recognition or interest. His eyebrows didn’t twitch, and his mouth didn’t pucker. No clenching of his jaw either. Nothing to indicate he’d even addressed her. Much less, seen her naked and touched her all over.

Shaking her head to dislodge those disastrously perilous thoughts, she had to get through this. Her entire staff was prepared to abandon her over what? A stupid serving position? She wanted to roll her eyes at the irony. It wasn’t like she was firing a long-term, valued employee or someone with rare talents. Tara was pretty, sure, and she could smile sweetly without spilling when she poured coffee. Wow, worker of the year. Employee of the month. Next, she could be the proud, young leader of the free world.

“You are suffering from all the pain and hurt over your sister’s death. You have unresolved anger that Tara is alive and currently in Ryder and Wyatt’s life and Ebony is not. That is no cause to fire her. And we won’t allow it.”

Petra dared to lecture her! She whipped her gaze from Chet’s somber expression, and looked at Petra. Petra no longer seemed angry and spoke to Chloe if she were a sad, innocent child who just learned her puppy had died but was being assured there would be others. The entire exchange was done with sad solemnity, but a firm hand too. Grief didn’t excuse bad behavior. Petra sympathetically chided Chloe and Chloe gritted her teeth, tightening her fists. How dare they patronize her this way?

Even if she were wrong and acting like a tyrannical despot, which, okay, maybe she was doing, but she had every right to do so. It was her café. Hers. Damn it. It was the only thing she had any control over in this world. This world that seemed so cruel now and could do anything at any time to anyone. If she could control this café, then she was hellbent on doing so.

“Allow it? This is my place. I’ll do whatever I damn well please. Fire and hire whoever I fucking want to. And this. Tara lied on her employment application. That invalidates her as an employee and I can fire her for any damn reason I want. No matter what you say or think.”

Infuriatingly, that whiny little bitch, Tara, spoke up. With her head hanging, she spoke softly, “I did lie. Just—I think this is for the best. Chloe can’t deal with me now. It would be miserable for both of us.”

Ya think? Chloe had to bite her tongue from spitting out the words to sad, body-sagging, wussy Tara.

“No.” Dok spoke again, bringing Chloe’s gaze to her. “You lied. We heard you. So what if your name is really Tara Tamasy? That isn’t why she’s firing you. She used to rave about what a hard worker you were, and how good you were with customers as well as the increase in sales and tips.”

Somehow, even Dok had turned against Chloe and sided with Tara. Chloe’s mouth hung open in abject shock at her disloyalty. She hired Dok when she came in there with no experience but desperate for a job. Her husband had recently left her and living hand to mouth, she was unable to secure any consistent work because she had no skills. None. Zero. The woman had never worked outside her house in her entire life. She had two kids: Chet and a daughter. Chloe frowned, realizing she didn’t even know who Chet’s sister was, much less, where she was. The point being, she—Chloe—gave Dok a chance when there were applicants who were far more qualified. She sensed dependability in Dok, something that turned out to be true, that is, until this very moment. But Chloe did go out on a limb for Dok when she needed her help the most? And fuck! Look at that. Dok couldn’t reciprocate when she needed it most.

“I call bullshit. This is strictly about Ryder.”

Distracted from her glower at Dok the Betrayer, Chloe whipped around to Chet, and her mouth dropped open in surprise. She was flummoxed at hearing his even voice and cool tone but mostly from his loud accusation about Ryder. She nearly sputtered on her spittle, she was so indignant toward him. How dare he? She was so upset, she smacked her desk with her clenched fist as she yelled at him, “This isn’t about Ryder. God! I don’t want to fuck my brother-in-law. I just don’t want this white trash influencing my sister’s son.” She flung out the hateful words and flopped back down on her desk chair before she realized what came out of her mouth. Shit! This wasn’t exactly what she meant to say. She sounded nasty and mean and far crasser than she usually did. But then again, nothing about her life was the same.

“Good.” She closed her eyes, wincing as the male voice shattered her inner shock and chiding. Ryder. It was his voice. “Because he doesn’t want to fuck you. And the people he chooses to influence his son are not selected by you. Nor will it affect any of your business decisions.”

“Ryder,” she choked his name out. She mentally longed to curl up into a fetal position, knowing that he heard what she said. The word fuck had no relation to them, which is why it never came up between them before. Not even as a suggestion. Now it had, and all because of Tara. This only confirmed to Chloe that she was right; Tara would eventually destroy them.

“Yeah, Ryder.” His gaze scanned the crowd, stopping for a profound second on Tara. He eyed her with obvious encouragement before looking back at Chloe, and the anger he felt was evident in his blazing eyes. “I’m still half-owner. You’re not firing Tara. Not for this. And she isn’t white trash and she hasn’t, nor will she ever, have a negative influence on Wyatt.” Of course, being oh-so-decent Ryder, he made his way to her through the mini crowd gathered in her office. Sweeping her up in his arms in a caring hug, she melted into him because he knew. Ryder knew more than anyone why Chloe was falling apart. And because of that, she needed him, and she didn’t want to share him with Tara. Naturally, she already knew Tara won. But despite the atrocities from her mouth and her mean actions, Ryder wouldn’t turn from her. He knew how much she loved Ebony. He understood. “What are you doing here, Chloe? You’re not ready yet. It’s too soon. Petra’s got you covered.”

Tears filled Chloe’s eyes. She blinked hard, but they streamed out anyway. It was his kind voice, and ignoring every horrible thing she just said about his girlfriend that finally shamed her into submission. Her hands fisted his shirt as he spoke, making the final proclamation. One he’d never have taken the right to announce before. “No one is getting fired. Why don’t you all go open up for a late lunch, and get the kitchen running?”

A collective sense of alarm over how she just acted before melting down into hysteria had all the onlookers staring at her. He added, “Please?”

Mumbling and shuffling as the crowd dispersed, she swore she could feel Chet’s gaze burning into her shoulder. He stayed to the side of her and lingered a second longer than everyone else, his gaze fixed on her and then on Ryder. He seemed to be burning the image of their embrace into his brain.

Once alone, they separated and she sat down, resting her elbows on her desk, and her head in her hands while hiding her face from Ryder. “I never considered having sex with you or even wanting to. I was just being dramatic.”

He sat near her. She had to slide over to accommodate him. His tone was so gentle, it hurt as he said, “I know, Chloe. But Tara and I are and that isn’t changing.”

Wow, Ryder never referred to sex with her, even now when he described himself in a relationship. She winced. “Gloves off, huh? You don’t talk like that very often.”

“Yeah. Honestly, she lied. I know she did. I ran a full background check on her and it’s not pretty. Including possession charges and prostitution. But it’s stuff that would only hurt her, not like burglary or things that would raise a red flag for us. But she’s also been working here long enough now that we know she’s trustworthy. You know she is.”

Chloe rocked her head back and forth in her hands. Her nose sounded stuffy and she sniffled. “I just want Ebony back.”

She jumped when Ryder set his hand heavily but gently on her shoulder. “I know.” 

His tone made her tears fall harder. But this time, they weren’t for Ebony but for them. His voice cracked, but it wasn’t filled with sadness for her. It was empathy. She knew it. She knew the difference. Ryder no longer felt the sadness as deeply as she did. It was relegated to the past, not the present. Deep in her gut she knew it was true. That’s why her anger simmered until it finally boiled over and she got so hot at Tara. Ryder and she weren’t on the same page about Ebony any longer. Chloe started that chapter all over again with grief, hurt, shock, anger, and sadness. Ryder had already ended that chapter and started an entirely new one. She knew it deep down in her gut. She had lost Ryder. She and Ebony had both lost him to Tara. To a new life. He would no longer be at her beck and call. The loss felt as deep and real as losing Ebony. She lifted her gaze, searching his face. “But you don’t anymore. You want her.”

“I do. I want Ebony back. I want her to come back and be the mother to our son, her son, like she was supposed to be. And, yes, I want her—Tara. But that doesn’t change how much I wanted Ebony. How much I wish this never happened to her. How much I grieve for her. Don’t ever doubt that. But I did grieve for her, Chloe. Healing from her was a long time in coming.”

She sniffled and kept shaking her head. His words confirmed what her gut knew. He was done with her. And with Ebony. “I can’t believe she’s dead. My sister. My other half. I’m all that’s remaining of us.”

“I’ll be here for you. Always. No matter what.”

She snorted. “As if she’s going to let that be. Not after what I just did.”

“Now that you realize what you just did was wrong, she won’t hold it over your head. Just go home. Don’t come back until we figure this out, okay? I’ll help you. Always. You know that. Just as you always help me with Wyatt.”

She rubbed her weary eyes. “Will you still let him be around me?”

“All the time.”

She rose to her feet. “Okay. I guess—”

“I’ll take care of the staff. Just go home and take care of yourself. Let me call your mom.”

She shook her head. “No. It’ll just upset her more. I got this. I just need some time alone.” She slipped the light coat over her arms, feeling as if she were being dismissed from her own establishment. But she humiliated herself enough for one day. She inflamed the very people who once felt nothing but sympathy towards her. “Thank you, Ryder. For stopping me here. I’ll… I’ll go find a better way. I just need some time alone.”

“Take all the time you need. And when you’re done, Wyatt and I will be waiting right here.”

Yeah, right. It would never be the same again. Her eyes stung with unshed tears. It felt like she did nothing but fail. She turned and slipped out the back door of the restaurant, hurrying past all the staff. No one said anything. She leaned against the back of the building and bent forward, catching her breath. Her heart raced and her blood boiled. Had she really just done that? She used to be a pretty reasonable employer. A nice person. A happy and optimistic person. Never one to shy away from conflict, she usually handled it through kindness, diplomacy, and well-rehearsed arguments, not by yelling and shouting out ultimatums in front of crowds. Hollowness made her feel empty. What had she just done?

She didn’t know how long she stayed there as she leaned back, using the wall for support. She breathed deeply, trying to calm her strung-out nerves.

Then a voice interrupted her and she spun around in surprise.

“He was never going to be yours.”