Trevor

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No one would ever understand the sheer discipline I really had.

Sitting in that seat, watching her walk in, that skirt that led into those long, luscious legs of hers. The way her blouse accentuated her chest's curves, with my knowledge of what was really underneath driving me batty. The way she had her hair tied back, like she was fully into the whole schoolmarm role-play thing for a porno or something.

Fuck, she was the only porno I ever needed. The way I was resisting rushing the front desk, bending her over it, and fucking her silly. Goddamn, no one would really understand how hard it really was for me.

Or how hard I was already.

She slammed her things down on the desk. Her determination was loud and clear, the fire in her eyes as she looked my way.

It wasn't a look of wanting to fuck me, unfortunately. She was too much of a damned professional. "Are you ready to actually learn, Trevor, or are you just here to ogle me again?"

Why was she acting like last night didn't happen? Was she seriously worried someone was going to catch wind of our little tryst? "Can't it be both?"

She grunted, and picked up her little accordion folder again, ready to storm out that door.

"Whoa, whoa," I bolted up, chasing after her. "Listen, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."

Stephanie stopped, turning to face me. "Do you really mean that?"

"Really, I do." I sighed. "I'm here to learn, babe... er, Ms. Casey. I want to do what I need to get back onto the field. You're here to help me, and I need that help."

That was the first time I saw a smile on her face since I left her apartment with her sweetly sleeping away.

I meant every word of it. God, did I. I knew it was tough for me. I jacked off this morning before I came in, because I thought maybe that would get my mind off doing wonderful, terrible things to her.

It didn't really help. I would have to conquer my libido through sheer force of will.

Stephanie walked back to the desk, and opened her things again. I went back to my seat, and tried to focus on listening intently to her – as an educator, and not the object of my desires.

I told her I would try. I would try to forget. I was a gigantic liar, because it wasn't something I was going to forget. It wasn't something I could forget.

"Right. Professor Hatch has filled me in on what needs to be done. The biggest thing dragging down your grade is that you completely failed to show up for your midterm. Like, at all. Doing a make-up exam would be all you need to get your GPA up past the 2.0 needed for him to allow you to resume your extracurricular activities. Which means your football."

"Jesus, 2.0? Am I doing that shitty?"

"A 2.0 is about a C. No one expects you to be valedictorian. The chance at that probably waved bye-bye to you long ago."

I had an ego. Yeah, one the size of feeding into the whole train theme I had going. I was seriously being deflated by all of this. I coasted through high school. I got Bs just without barely even trying, paying enough attention to put two and two together and get the work done.

No one likes being basically called an idiot like I was. It didn't matter that I had the skills and the looks, otherwise. I didn't want the world to think of me as nothing more than a dumbass jock.

I didn't want Stephanie to think of me as nothing more than a dumbass jock.

"Your major, if you even remember," she continued, "was in medieval literature. Maybe you should think about studying the influence of Chaucer and how it reflected social values of the time?"

"Chaucer?" I shook my head. Maybe I was as dumb as they thought I was. I thought medieval literature would be about dragons and shit, or at least badass stuff like Beowulf or something like that. Nope. Not a whole lot of badassery, and even fewer dragons. Sure, it was an excuse major so I could play football, but damn, some people would kill to have the chance I had.

"Yeah, Chaucer. The whole foundation of English literature? You know, that guy who wrote in English and basically codified the language we're speaking?"

My head was resting on my hand. I tried to focus on the task at hand, but it was really difficult when she was right there. She was talking nerdy to me, but I think I was getting to the point where Stephanie could read a phone book and I'd be turned on by it.

"Have you even read Chaucer, Trevor?"

I nodded. "I'm familiar with it. So what, you want me to compare it and offer an insight on how it reflected contemporary social norms, especially on class conflict and the role of religion in everyday life?"

She stared at me blankly. "Did... did you just say all that?"

"Yeah, what?"

"I'm sorry, I just thought you just had no clue at all about any of this."

I smirked. "What, do you just assume you know everything about me, Steph? Oh I'm sorry, Ms. Casey? That you know exactly who I am after sleeping with me once? That I'm nothing more than some brain-dead football player?"

She was turning beet red as I went on. "Well, um... yeah."

"There's a whole world you don't know about me." Like how I really felt about her. Fuck. I knew she thought I was just some horny idiot. "Besides, after our last conversation, I hit the books myself. Studied up. Didn't know exactly what I needed, but just gave myself a general refresher."

"You, of all people, actually studied?"

"Oh my god, right? I studied." I broke out into a laugh.

It finally broke her super serious demeanor too.

"Well, then," she sighed, her smile fading yet still there, "teaching you won't be like pulling teeth. You know, like I expected it to be.

"Teach me, teacher. Show me what I need to know. Make me a gigantic fucking nerd."

"Well, you're gigantic, but I don't know if I would ever really call you a nerd."

"Let me go get a pocket protector. Some thick glasses. Maybe go for the more modern look and get a fedora too."

I wanted to keep her laughing. Yet all the same, I understood that there was more to all of this than flirting. My change of heart wasn't to get to Stephanie alone. I was going to succeed. I was going to get back out onto the field, I was going to be the badass player I could be. I was going to be signed, and be a sports sensation, someone to be envied by millions, and give my mother everything she deserved.

Then, I was going to make Stephanie love me.

I wasn't going to accept any other outcome.