Vivian
IT WAS LIKE I never left here. Suddenly, I was swept back to being sixteen with my high school love, constantly saving me over and over again. There were many nights I would dream of our life together as adults. Married, kids, successful careers, and all the in-betweens. I wanted it all and all with him.
Here I was now.
We were married. I was successful but still unsure of what he did. He seemed to be doing okay at whatever it was that brought income into the ranch. He had the newest ranch equipment. The house was updated and a little bit modernized.
My fingers had stopped flying over the keyboard thinking of our first kiss. My characters were having a similar flashback and there were times I took from my own personal experiences to add details and depth to my books and stories.
For Brent and me, we were thirteen and the junior high varsity football game finished with a big win over our county rival. We walked hand-in-hand toward the main road where his mother was going to pick us up. My parents probably didn’t even know I was gone since they were at some office function. We were standing under the lamp post which was dimly lit. I thought it to be almost scary, but with him by my side, I knew I would be okay. Brent was always my protector. My hand had been sweaty from the nervousness of being alone with him in such a manner. I remember him clearing his throat and when I looked over to him, his lips smashed into mine.
My first thought was, what was he doing? My second thought was, I liked it.
“Viv.”
I yelped in surprise as Brent touched my shoulder.
“I’m sorry. I called your name.” He apologized quickly.
“I was in deep thought.” I shut my laptop and stood up. “What’s up?”
“It’s time to go.”
“Go?” I shrugged. “Go where?”
He playfully rolled his eyes. “Remember Mom and Dad are having a get together barbecue at their house. I told you about it last night at dinner.”
“Oh right.” Suddenly the butterflies fluttered around my insides. Seeing his family could be a good thing or an entire disaster. I loved his parents because they always treated me good. However, things were different now. We were married and I wasn’t sure what he had told them. “Let me get ready.”
“Okay. I’ll wait for you outside.” He smiled and walked out of the cabin.
I took a couple of deep breaths and checked myself in the mirror. I didn’t look horrible. My brown curly hair was somewhat tamed. The Texas heat made it worse at times, but today it seemed to be okay. I didn’t have much makeup on since I was going to be writing all day alone in the cabin. Although makeup wasn’t something I wore a lot of, except my lip gloss. My top was a soft silk and loose. I- couldn’t have anything too clingy. I should change because a barbecue was certainly going to bring a spot or two to the dripping sauce on my outfit. However, I didn’t change. I grabbed my phone, and I didn’t know why because no one would be contacting me except Olivia. I was ignoring her right now.
“I’m ready.” I announced as he grinned at me.
Together we walked back down to the main house and he opened the door to his truck. As he drove toward town I stared out my window. Billings was not an extremely small town. The latest population sign read 12,754. It seemed the same to me. Memories of me riding my bike up and down the street, reading on the porch, and the kids from school making fun of my weight. Even though I was now twenty-eight those memories still cut me deeply. I glanced over at Brent. The slight scruff over his jaw line made him sexier. More manly. He was always a cowboy to the truest form. He loved horses, could rope cattle, and loved Texas more than his own soul. Not to forget his ranch. He loved being on the land and taking care of it. It wasn’t a surprise to me to see him still there even though his parents had moved on.
He was kind. Actually, he was beyond kind. He was a protector. It was a title he had earned well since the first day he saved me. It wasn’t yesterday in the retrospect of things, but it felt like it. I was eight and such a loner. I blamed my parents for my lack of friends because of their choice to raise me independently. They made me afraid to make friends to ensure I didn’t disrespect their desire to not be codependent on anyone.
I had been walking back from the library with my haul of the latest newly released books. Four of the most popular girls in my class, along with their boyfriends, were across the street at the park shouting at me. They called me nerd, dork, bookworm, teacher’s pet. Those didn’t hurt as bad as the words fatty, cow, pig, and sow. I tried to hide my tears, but they rolled down my cheeks on their own.
Then I felt an arm come around my shoulders, pulling me close.
“Don’t worry, I’ve got your back.” His simple words had gotten me through many a day and nights. It’s the same sentence I used in my story for Victor. He was my Brent in fictional form. I never admitted that to anyone. The secret would always remain with me.
Living with my parents had kept me from experiencing many things throughout my childhood. However, with Brent and his family, I was able to because he was there for me. Seeing him in Las Vegas was a grand surprise. For one, it was bad because those memories I was hiding from came back. For two, it was an awakening for me. Not just my creative juices, but for the realization that I’d been hiding. I ran away from my parents and my town thinking I could discover and change the world with my novels and writing. In truth, I ran away from Brent because his loved scared me. No, he’d never hurt me. If anything I hurt him, but because it was real. I’d never felt real love until him. At first, I thought it was just his protection I loved, but all of him had my heart and soul.
He pulled down the street not far from the library and the park I remembered vividly. He drove up the driveway still in silence.
“Ready?” He questioned with a less than bright grin.
I nodded. “Let’s go.” I tried to sound confident but his worried look quickly washed it away.
He opened the truck door and led the way up the rest of the driveway, around the house and out to the backyard.
Sitting on the back porch by the grill, they were laughing and smiling. Then they just stopped. My eyes fell upon his mother. In my youth, she was my mom away from…well...my mom. Seeing her now, she looked the same, only a little bit older. Her long dark hair was now cut into a long bob. Her eyes were still bright, but the shock on her face was clear. It matched her husbands.
“Vivian?” Her voice strained. “You married Vivian?”
A hot pain ran through me. Brent had been extremely close to his parents and he didn’t tell them he married me. Did he tell them I was at the ranch? What had he told them? As if I was just bucked off the horse reality hit me as hard as the ground. He was ashamed of me. Saying the words out loud wasn’t necessary since his omission said it all.
“You didn’t tell her.” The tears burned my eyes.
For a moment, I thought my protector had come back to help me find myself again. To come in and save me from the world I had barricaded myself from, but he couldn’t tell his family about me. His belief in what I thought was us was a fraud. Maybe he did want my money? Maybe it was some scheme to break my heart the way I did his?
“I...I…” He stammered on his words and I rushed away from him.
My legs carried me quickly without me actually realizing it until I was running down the sidewalk. I could hear Brent calling my name, but I had to get away from him.
The day I left this town, I cried. My tears were only for Brent. The dates I went on in college never lasted because they weren’t him. They didn’t have his smile, his eyes, or his charisma. When I left college, my focus was only on getting published. Then my fictional world took over my real life.
Until Las Vegas and seeing him.
But now, the stabbing pain in my soul was matching the burning sensation in my heart. He did this on purpose. He somehow figured out who I was and tricked me into marrying him. He wanted me to hurt more than ever before and take everything I worked for.
He wanted to take my life away after I had just fallen back in love with him.