Nearly three months ago, I walked into my parents’ house on a Wednesday night, looking for comfort and solace after I was left reeling by Jillian’s betrayal—and my complete idiocy. Dinner was already on the table, as I knew it would be, so I took my regular seat and began filling my plate full of food. Comfort food.

But before I could take the first bite, Mama swatted back of my head then took my plate away, holding it hostage just out of my reach. “Where is Jillian? What did you do to her?”

That was a rhetorical question, of course. Mama already knew exactly where Jillian was and why she’d left me. There were no secrets in this family when it came to her kids’ love lives. I cut my eyes over to my father, the traitor who’d told on me. He smirked at me, taking Mama’s side, as usual.

“Really, Dad?”

He shrugged, unaffected by my verbal jab. “You were wrong in what you did to Jillian, son. Your mother is right to be upset with you. And you made her curse, Damon. A lot. You know I don’t like it when your mama curses.”

Mama walked around the table, my full plate of food still in her hand, and sat down across from me. “You look me in the eye, son, when I ask you this question.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“If you had to choose between killing me and killing Jillian, who would you choose?”

“Mama—”

“Don’t Mama me! I asked you a direct question.”

“I wouldn’t choose. I’d take it myself first.”

“That wasn’t one of your options. Jillian didn’t have that choice either. You should be ashamed of yourself. I am so disappointed in you, Damon. When I met her, I knew she was the one for you. I told you to be good to her, but you didn’t listen to me. Now, you’ve disrespected her, and you’ve dishonored me with your actions. You’ve broken both of our hearts. You don’t eat at this table until Jillian is back in my house again.”

She stood and walked toward the kitchen with my plate in her hand. When she reached the doorway, she stopped and looked at me. “If you want to eat, your plate will be in here.”

“There’s no table in there. Or chairs.”

“You can stand up and eat at the counter.”

I looked at Dad for a little help, but he just shrugged before taking a big bite of his food. Right in front of me. As I stood in the kitchen, eating my meal at the counter while the rest of my immediate family ate together at the dining table, a twenty-pound sledgehammer hit me upside my head. The piece of the puzzle I had completely missed in my relationship with Jillian.

Mom and Dad were always on the same side. Always.

They stood shoulder-to-shoulder, figuratively speaking, and faced whatever problems were in front of them, together. They weren’t separate units, testing each other’s loyalty at every turn. There were plenty of times when Dad would shield Mama from his actions when he thought it was best, but never without her knowing exactly why whatever it was had to happen in the first place. Never without involving her in the important decisions he made or getting her advice when the possible outcomes of his choices were unclear.

They thoroughly believed two heads were better than one.

I should’ve used that approach with Jillian. But then, hindsight is always 20/20. Using the excuse that I didn’t know for sure if I could trust her only helped ease my guilt slightly. My gut knew better. My instincts told me otherwise. My treacherous heart tried to warn my stupid head, but neither listened to reason. In the end, I betrayed myself every bit as much as, if not more than, Jillian did when she readied her knife at my throat.

Jillian and I were a long way from being my parents or having the trusting relationship they had, but the foundation was there. At least, it was before I fucked up in the most royal way.

But my parents raised me to work hard and fight harder for whatever I wanted most. In this case, I’d fight for whom I wanted most. The only one I wanted by my side. And when I got her back, I’d never let her go again. I didn’t know how or when to quit.

“You look like a man who has a new mission,” Dad said, pulling me from my thoughts. He wore a knowing smirk while watching me with his keen eyes. “A trip to Louisiana is in order, no?”

“An extended stay in Louisiana is definitely in order in the very near future. But we haven’t found Lorenzo yet. He went underground after issuing the order to kill Jillian. Percy has had his ear to the ground on the street and has checked Lorenzo’s emails at Morgan and Bartholomew, but so far he’s come up empty.”

“You don’t think he’s left the area?”

“No, not yet.” I shook my head. “We’ve got eyes on his two first-level soldiers. They’re still here, working to make alliances with one of the smaller families in the Tri-State area—the Rossi clan. We’ve already secured their cooperation and put one of our men on the inside, though. Lorenzo is here, for now. When he figures out we’ve infiltrated the family he thinks will help overthrow us, he’ll make a move on Jillian. I’m sure of it.”

“In that case,” Uncle Leo said from the doorway, “we need to find Lorenzo and shut the Sanfratello family down as soon as possible. Maybe we should call an emergency family meeting, Vincenzo.”

Dad replied with a single nod, but his eyes never left mine. I sensed his concern for Jillian, knowing Lorenzo would never confront me head on. Lorenzo’s modus operandi lacked the hallmarks of a real man. He’d go through my loved ones to get to me. Since Jillian failed her assignment, she’d be the first target. But I knew that motherfucker better than he thought I did. He’d bide his time, letting me think all had passed and was forgotten, then he’d make his move.

“I’ll send a few of my guys down to cover Jillian. If they see any guys out of the ordinary lurking around, they won’t hesitate to rush in and crush them.”

“Good idea, Damon. Lorenzo’s blatant move against you won’t go unanswered. Trust me,” Dad promised.

I’d hate to be in Geno Sanfratello’s shoes after my father finished with him. Lorenzo sealed his own father’s fate when he disappeared like a weakling.

“I’ll gather the troops for a sit-down tonight.” Uncle Leo turned to face me, his expression more serious than I’d ever seen on him. “You make amends for what you did to Jillian, Damon. Direct your loathing at the Sanfratellos for putting Jillian and you in this predicament in the first place, but you have to work this out with her.

“Your mother—she’s not happy. Your aunt Maria—she said she’s not speaking to you, so I had to smooth things over with her on your behalf. I promised her, Damon. I promised my wife you would fix this mess and bring Jillian back into the family. You know I don’t make promises lightly, and I don’t break them, especially when they’re to my wife.”

Uncle Leo gave me an out with Aunt Maria, putting most of the blame on Lorenzo, but that wouldn’t work for me. I had no delusions of whose fault Jillian’s leaving was. That was all on me. But Uncle Leo was right, I had to fix that little problem, at any cost.

My first order had to be protecting Jillian and putting an end to any threat Lorenzo posed against her. While my crew in New York and I searched every possible hiding hole, other family men would comb the area around Jillian’s house, watching her every move to thwart any potential attack. Intrusive surveillance means would have to be put in place to protect her, and I’d catch hell when she found out, no doubt. But her safety was worth whatever tongue-lashing she had for me later.

I left my parents that night with a heavy weight on my chest. The maddening premonition that I wouldn’t reach her in time lingered in my mind, making it damn near impossible to focus. When I took a mental step back and asked myself how I’d approach this if my heart weren’t involved—a novel concept I’d never had to consider before—my path became clearer.

I’d burn the fucking city down until I got my man.

Flick my Bic…I was ready to start a wildfire.

“You have no reason to stick around,” Jillian yelled.

She placed her hands on my chest and tried to push me toward the door. But I didn’t let her move me out of the way that time. She got away with it at the doctor’s office simply because I allowed her to get in her car. But after I walked inside her house, there was no way I’d simply let her push me out of her life. Too much was at stake, and I had to make her see I understood that now. I knew where I fucked up, and I was willing to pay my penance in any way she wanted.

“No, doll.” I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against my chest. “You’re not pushing me aside. Not this time. Not ever again. Even if you weren’t pregnant with my baby, I’d have every reason to stay. Because I want to be right here with you.”

She was torn between what she should do and what she wanted to do. Part of her craved my touch, urging her to relent and melt into my embrace. The strong, independent part of her needed to stand her ground, wanting the upper hand after the way we parted. I understood both sides of her personality all too well.

“Damon, what you did—keeping my mother’s death from me when you knew how much she meant to me… I just can’t forgive that.”

“Doll, that night, I got a text from my dad at the same time you got the text. When he told me before I was discharged from the hospital, he asked me not to say anything to you until he was absolutely positive it was her. Just because they claimed to have gotten to your mom didn’t mean it was true. Yes, we had reason to believe they were telling the truth, but we didn’t know for certain. I couldn’t take the chance of telling you what we thought but hadn’t verified.

“Lorenzo was setting a trap for you—he wanted you to rush in and try to save the day. He’d planned to have you both killed that night. That’s why her sitter was kept alive, so she could talk to you and tell you that story about your mom going to the doctor. They thought once you found out she’d fallen, you’d fly home right away no matter what the sitter said.

“I wasn’t even supposed to tell you when I did, but I couldn’t keep it from you any longer. Even after you tried to kill me in my sleep.”

“I didn’t try to kill you, and you weren’t even asleep!”

I smiled, knowing that would be her response. But at least she was still talking to me. “I know, doll. What I’m trying to tell you is there are family rules that just aren’t broken. No one simply ignores a direct order from my father without a damn good reason, and even then, there’s no way to know how he’d react. I can count on one finger how many times I’ve gone against his wishes as an adult, and that one time was for you. I broke so many of my own rules for you, it’s not even fucking funny. There’s only one reason why I’d even think about defying him, and that’s because I love you, Jillian.”

She shook her head and dropped her eyes to my chest. Then she stepped out of my arms, and I knew the opposing feelings tore her apart inside like a civil war. “I can’t, Damon. You hurt me so badly. The past three months without you have been pure hell, but I somehow survived. Day by day, I grew a little stronger, and so did my resolve to get over you. But now I have even more reason to protect myself from you—to protect my baby from you.”

“You don’t need to be protected from me any more than our baby does. I’m sorry for everything, Jillian. For hurting you, for not trusting you, for not listening to my gut when it screamed at me for doubting you in the first place. Most of all, I’m sorry I couldn’t get to your mom in time to save her, and for not being able to tell you about our suspicions. Doll, I promise I’ll never hurt you again. When a Marchetti makes a promise, it’s for life. Especially if it’s to the one we love. I hate that I’ve put this between us, but I’ll prove how much I love you over time.”

Jillian looked up at me, a sweet but slightly sad smile on her beautiful face. “That was a very moving speech, Damon. I’m sure you rehearsed it for a long time to get it just right. I’ll bet that same declaration of love and promises would make any other woman drop to her knees and worship at your feet. Too bad it doesn’t work on me.

“Now, you’re trespassing in my house, and I’ve tolerated your intrusion far too long. Get. The. Fuck. Out. If you ever barge into my house uninvited again, I will have your ass arrested. I’m very good friends with the chief of police in this little town, and he’d be all too interested to hear everything I know about you.”

“All right, doll. I’ll go for now, but only because you’re upset, and I don’t want to make it even worse by staying longer. But I’m warning you, Jillian, don’t think we are anywhere in the neighborhood of being over. I’ll be back tomorrow so we can spend the day together. Until tomorrow, my love.”

She opened the front door and shot me a look that dared me to defy her. Fuck me if I didn’t walk out with a hard-on the size of the fucking Chrysler Building after the way she manhandled me. The things I’d love to do to that sassy Southern mouth of hers.

She may have kicked me out of her house, but I wasn’t going anywhere. Nothing in New York held sway over me the way she did. And as long as she was out in the open, she was vulnerable to Lorenzo and his thirst for revenge and dominance in our world. And, as long as she wasn’t by my side, he would wait in the wings for his chance at retribution.

Since the moment I learned she was pregnant, I hadn’t been able to wipe the smile off my face. I knew I had my work cut out for me to convince her to forgive me, to remind her she loved me, and to show her how much I loved her, too. But giving up wasn’t in the Marchetti DNA. Losing her wasn’t an option. And allowing her to get rid of me wasn’t in the cards.

Her warning still stood the same as the day I first issued it. Once she entered my world, there was no leaving it. That was one rule I’d willingly abide by…and also hold her to.