Sienna

“Milk?”

“Sure,” I whispered.

I sat at the island divider that separated the kitchen and the dining room in Kace’s apartment. My hands were cupped tightly around the hot mug of tea. I watched the steam rise up and kept taking deep breaths.

My eyes lifted and I watched Kace open the fridge and reach for the milk.

He twisted off the cap. “Tell me when.”

He poured the milk.

“When,” I said.

He put the cap back on and went to the fridge again.

He was my hero. For a third time now. I didn’t know what to think. I probably did everything wrong. The second I saw Chris coming at me through the crowd at the party…

“Sugar?”

“Yes, please.”

Kace opened a cabinet and took out a bag of sugar. He got a spoon and gave me both.

“No sugar dish?” I asked, slightly grinning.

“No, darlin’,” he said, grinning back. “It’s on my wish list. Okay?”

I unfolded the bag and scooped two big heaps.

Instead of putting the bag away, Kace slid it out of the way.

“We need to call the police. Report what happened.”

“I will,” I said. “I just… please.”

“Right.” Kace showed his hands. “Sorry. I don’t want to pressure you. I’m so sorry, Sienna. Just…”

“Stop,” I said. I looked down and shook my head. “I don’t want to hear that either.”

“Okay. You tell me what you want right now. My place is yours if you want to stay here. If you want a ride back to your car, I can follow you anywhere you need to go.”

“Can I just get my car in the morning?” I asked.

“Of course.”

“Am I holding you up, Kace? Do you have work tomorrow or anything?”

“No,” he said.

I wasn’t sure if I believed him or not. “Are you sure?”

“Darlin’, don’t worry about it.”

“Tell me about the building your friend bought.”

“What?”

“You said your friend bought a building.”

Kace laughed. “I did say that, didn’t I? Wow. I just started rambling there. Uh, my good buddy, Mack. He’s always had this dream of he and I opening a business together. I’m not going for that. Ever.”

“Why not?”

“Just don’t want it. Money and friends and all that don’t mix. I’ve been helping him for a while now with his work. Grabbing side projects and whatnot.”

“Still restoring stuff?” I asked.

“Not so much. I mean, when Mack calls, that’s usually what it’s for. But on my own? Nah.”

“Oh,” I said. “You really seemed to like that.”

He shrugged. “Things change, Sienna.”

With that said, Kace turned away and stood at the sink. I felt a tension between us. I sipped the hot tea and took a deep yet shaky breath.

“Kace,” I whispered. “I think I owe you an apology.”

“I doubt that,” he said. “After what you just went through.” He slowly turned again. “You really want to know about me and Mack? And you want to apologize to me for something that happened a while ago?”

“What if I said it was a much needed distraction?”

I watched as Kace swallowed hard. I could feel the anger swelling from him into the air. Just like before, when he saved me from what I was thinking of doing on that roof, it was like he was there for me, but also there for someone else.

“Tell you what,” he said. “You’re here. You’re safe. My door is locked. Two locks on the door, okay? You have your phone if you think it’s time to call the police. I’m going to go and dig up some blankets and pillows while you drink your tea.”

“Kace…”

He pushed from the sink and exited the kitchen.

I sat there alone, the first time I’d been alone since everything that happened at Lexi’s place. I took a minute to dig through my mind, finding all the pieces of what happened as though they were ancient memories. My brain was quick to do that when bad things happened. To break it into pieces and shove it away so I didn’t think about it. Even though it was so fresh.

I sipped the tea a few more times and stood up to go and find Kace. I helped myself to a tour of his apartment, which wasn’t that hard to navigate. One thing I noticed was that there was nothing on the walls. No pictures. No paintings. No… nothing. Just plain walls. For all I knew, it could have been a staged apartment to show potential renters.

There was a door open next to the bathroom and that’s where Kace stood. Reaching up, pulling something off a shelf. Call me whatever you want, but I froze for a second and watched the way he reached. The way the short sleeves of his shirt pulled up. The way his entire shirt lifted up, showing the top of his beltless jeans.

I shook my head, still trying to grasp that Kace was the guy who saved me from what could have been a horrible situation. Well, okay, it was a horrible situation. What could have happened…

“I don’t do parties, okay?”

Kace jumped and stepped back. A split second later, a pile of blankets and pillows fell from the closet. They all hit Kace and then hit the floor.

I started to laugh.

“Really?” he asked.

I looked at the blankets and back at Kace. It shouldn’t have been funny, but it was. This giant man of muscle and attitude… and little me scaring him and blankets and pillows falling on him.

I pointed to a blanket on the floor that was a red-purple color with yellow and blue flowers.

“Nice,” I said. “Is that your favorite?”

He looked down and then at me. “Keep this up and I’ll make you sleep on the couch.”

“Oh? Where am I sleeping right now?”

Kace didn’t hesitate when he spoke. “My bed.”

* * *

Okay, full disclosure, there were several times when I’d thought about what it would be like to sleep in Kace’s bed. Of course, those thoughts included Kace along with me. Possibly the two of us tearing each other’s clothes off as we worked our way to the bedroom. But certainly never like this. My body tingled as it froze. My nerves bounced and I felt something like panic begin to kick up again. The moment I thought about Kace touching me… was the moment I thought about someone else touching me. Holding me against that wall…

“You get the bed, darlin’,” Kace said. “I’m on the couch. Before anything gets misunderstood here.”

“Right,” I said, nodding, trying to save face. “Right. I knew that.”

“I was only kidding,” Kace said. “About you sleeping on the couch. My couch sucks. You need a good night of sleep too. I promise you’re safe here.”

“I know. I believe you.”

“Okay.” Kace crouched and scooped up the pillows and blankets.

He started to walk toward the hallway and there wasn’t enough room for the two of us, which meant that I was forced to get out of his way.

I hurried to let him past, promising myself that I wasn’t going to smell the air as he walked by. But I did. I smelled the dusty, sleepy smell of the blankets and Kace himself. Again, my brain flashed what I wanted and what I feared.

He tossed everything to the couch and pointed to the clock on his cable box. “Getting late. You want to get some shut eye or hang out?”

“I want to tell you what happened.”

“Okay. I’m all ears.”

“I don’t do parties and all that stuff.”

“You said that.”

“I’d had a rough night at work. The one woman I work with was having a get together. Everyone was bothering me about going. I’ll be honest… I haven’t done much since the last time we were together, Kace.”

“Together?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You know what I mean. I just have been… whatever. So I decided to go. And there was a guy there. We were talking a little bit and we went outside on the fire escape. He started to get too touchy for me, so I kicked him in the balls and left.”

“You left?”

“I panicked. I couldn’t find Lexi. And there were a lot more people there. I was going to get into my car and leave, but then he was there again. Like right there. I was already outside the apartment, so I ran. Looking back on that, it was stupid. But I called for help and nobody heard me. Nobody cared. I just…” I looked down. “I got so scared, Kace. I thought if I could out run him around the block or something, I could get to my car and leave without him seeing me.” I looked up and saw that Kace was blurry. Tears were in my eyes again. This was the point where I’d normally just swallow things down and pretend it never happened. But when I looked at Kace, I wanted to tell him more. I wanted to tell him everything. “I thought I could lose him. that was a terrible idea. I had no idea where I was going and he caught up to me. For the record, I was going to fight back. Okay? I wasn’t going to just stand there. I was waiting for a chance…”

“You don’t have to justify anything to me, darlin’,” Kace said. “In case you don’t remember, I don’t judge. Anything you do or say, I trust in. I wanted to kill that guy. And I would have.”

I shivered again. I nodded. “I know. That look in your eyes…”

“This isn’t about me,” Kace said. “I don’t want to keep saying sorry that something happened. So I won’t. But whatever you need, I’ll help with.”

“Right now I think I just want some sleep and figure out what to do tomorrow.”

“You got it.”

I hesitated for a second. I looked at the couch, then back at Kace. “Is the couch really uncomfortable?”

“Horrible,” he said. “To sit on it, it’s not too bad. But to sleep on it? No way. I need a new one. It’s on my list of things to do in life.”

I turned my eyes and glanced down the hallway.

“Kace. I don’t want to be alone tonight.”

“You’re not alone,” he said. “If you want to sit up until the sun comes up and talk, I’m game. You want some more hot tea? I’ll make it. You want coffee? I’ll make it. You want a beer? A shot of whiskey? Name it.”

My mouth suddenly worked faster than my head did.

And I blurted out exactly what I wanted.

“I want you to sleep with me.”

“What?” Kace asked.

I felt my cheeks burning hot. “I mean… you know. Um… in bed. Your bed. Oh, crap.” I shook my head. “You shouldn’t be sleeping on that couch.”

“I don’t give a shit about the couch.”

“I do,” I said. “And I don’t want to be alone. Please. I’m asking you.”

Kace nodded. “Right. Okay. If that’s what you want. Let’s go.”

He pointed and started to walk.

I shouldn’t have been as nervous as I was because nothing was going to happen. Even still, my heart fluttered as we walked down the hallway to the bedroom. He opened the door and turned on the light.

“You get yourself comfortable first,” he said. “Tell me what you want me to do with the lights. On. Off. A little light. Whatever you want.”

As I passed by him, I touched his arm. “I don’t get it. Again, Kace. Why me?”

He looked down at me. “Truthfully, darlin’, if I’d seen what I saw… I mean, I didn’t know it was you at first.”

“So anyone could be standing here right now?”

Gently, Kace lifted his right hand and touched my cheek. “No. Not at all. I would have waited there until I figured out another plan. But you… I don’t know. It’s you. That’s all I’ve got right now.”

“I guess that’s all I need then.”

I slipped away and realized I was in jeans. I touched my hips and bit my lip.

“Hey, Kace, I have to ask something.”

“Ask away.”

“Do you have anything I can wear to bed?”

“First you want my bed, now you want my PJs?”

I looked back and grinned. “Yeah.”

“You know, I don’t work this hard to get a woman into bed that I plan on sleeping with.” He quickly stopped and shut his eyes. “Fuck. I’m sorry for saying that. That came off wrong.”

“It’s fine,” I said. I felt a little twisted up. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Let me get you something to wear.”

Kace dug through some drawers and tossed me a pair of black pants that had no chance of actually fitting me. But they had strings so I could tie them as tightly as humanly possible.

“T-shirt work?” he asked.

“Yeah, that’s fine,” I said. “Thank you.”

He threw a t-shirt at the bed and left the room without hesitation.

I stared at the door, trying to understand him.

I got changed and opened the door to find Kace literally standing right there. I gasped when I saw him.

“Who’d you think it would be?” he asked with a grin.

But the grin quickly faded.

My mind and memory were messing with me again.

“You look good,” Kace said. “You ready for bed yet?”

“Yeah. I’m ready.”

“Lights?”

“Off.”

“I have an idea.”

He backed away and turned on the light in the hallway. He came back to the bedroom and turned off the lights. He left the door open just enough so that a small amount of light came in. I didn’t admit it, but that was perfect.

“You get into bed first,” he said. “I’ll sleep near the edge.”

“What if I have to go and pee?”

“Then you can climb over me.”

I cocked my head to the side.

“Fuck,” he said.

Kace got into the bed first and basically sat up against the wall.

I slowly inched into the bed, feeling shaky, tired, confused and even a little bit excited because it was Kace. I couldn’t believe how this entire night had turned out.

“I’ll wait for you to crash, darlin’,” he whispered.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I know. But it’ll make you more comfortable.”

I pulled the blankets up to my chin and curled up tight. The blankets, the pillow, the room, it smelled like Kace. It was soothing. It was comfortable.

“Kace?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you talk to me?”

“About what?”

“Anything. Tell me about that house again.”

“The house…?”

“The one you took me to. With the missing shutter.”

Kace laughed. “Right. I haven’t been there in a long time, Sienna. I haven’t been anywhere in a long time, honestly. Just helping out Mack. He always does these big and stupid things and I’m there to bail his ass out. So I’ll help him fix up that building. He’s convinced that he can do it to all the buildings down in the shit hole.”

“Shit hole?”

“That’s what we call that area, darlin’. I grew up near there. Mack grew up in the shit hole. I don’t know what’ll happen though. I don’t mind working on the building. I haven’t really done anything since… whatever happened with us.”

I opened my mouth, but I was so tired and nothing came out.

There was silence for a few seconds.

Then Kace kept talking. “I don’t even know what happened with us, darlin’. It sort of had this feeling of okay and then it was gone. I didn’t want to burden you and I know that you didn’t want to burden me. I can’t believe we met like this. We have to stop meeting like this. Maybe next time we can bump into each other at a store or a movie or something.” There was silence again. “Well, goodnight, Sienna. Not sure if you’re asleep yet or not. If you can hear me and you need anything, just wake me up. I don’t mind. I really don’t have anything to do tomorrow. Or today. Whatever time it is right now. I just hope you feel safe here. That’s all I can say.”

He paused again, and this time it was for good.

I was half asleep as I reached behind me. I slowly eased my hand through the covers until I found Kace’s hand. I didn’t want to hold it or anything like that. I just wanted to touch it. To feel my fingers sliding over his rough hand. Knowing that he was next to me. Knowing that he somehow found me to save me. And now he was keeping me safe again.

My mind started to slip into the world of sleep and I had one last thought.

I didn't want to lose Kace this time.