Ron and I talked before Danielle and I officially became an item. I needed his blessing, the okay from an old friend. She meant nothing to him. He had his choice of any girl out there. He was successful, good-looking, and a catch. Danielle was just a fuck toy for him. She was his arm candy for events, but he had no real use for her and didn’t see a future for them. I took his blessing and grabbed the reins, making Danielle mine.

Danielle rescued me from my loneliness. We didn’t get to see each other much, but the time we did spend together meant everything to me, though I never did get past the issue of her being a stripper. We talked about moving in together, and I felt it was right; my only hang-up was her line of work.

I learned everything I could about Danielle. She came from a broken home, and her mom was on her second marriage, much like my mother, although I’d had my father for most of my life. She’d started to dance to save money for college, but she never found the time or motivation to go after she started making the big money and becoming immersed in the adult industry. She’d never been engaged and had a couple boyfriends through the years. She was like me—a troubled home drove her to addiction at an early age. We were a matched set of fucked-up reality.

“D, I want to live with you, too, but I need you to do something for me first.” We sat on the couch facing each other, talking about the pros and cons of getting rid of one of our places. We spent all of our time off together, and it seemed a waste of money.

“What, sweetheart?” She fidgeted with her hands and looked at her fingers.

I touched her chin and moved her face upward. I needed to look into her eyes. “I need you to stop stripping. I can’t stand other men looking at you and seeing you naked.”

“I make such good money, though.”

“Baby, we’ll be living together. I make great money. Isn’t there something else you can do? I’m too jealous of a person to have you continue. It’s been killing me.”

“I know how to make drinks. I guess I could bartend or something.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m just used to the cash I get dancing.”

“You aren’t a dancer. Guys don’t come there to see your moves. They come there to see your tits and ass. It’s my tits and ass now, and I won’t have you naked in front of strangers. I can’t, or we’ll never make it.”

“Okay, Kayden. I’ll put my notice in and look for a bartending job. Anything to be with you. I didn’t think I’d be ‘dancing’ this long. The money made it too hard to quit, but for you…I will.” I smiled at her last two words.

I felt an overwhelming sense of relief. Every night that she worked, I’d do anything to keep myself busy and not think of her naked on the stage. I usually turned to the bottle, although her working at a bar wasn’t the best solution either, but at least her clothes would stay on. I grabbed her face and kissed her passionately. She’d made me happy with the knowledge. Soon a major stress in our relationship would be over.

“It means the world to me, sweetheart. Your place or mine?” I didn’t want to live at her place. It was cute but cramped and all chick.

“Yours is bigger, and I can break my lease anytime. I don’t have much stuff to pack up, and it would just be easier. I hate this neighborhood, too.”

“I won’t argue with you on all those points. I’ll help you pack when you’re ready.” I stroked her cheek and felt at peace, but I was still anxious about taking this step. Bridget had ruined me for totally trusting a woman. She’d stabbed me in the heart at the last moment, but I should have known better. I wasn’t on her economic rung of the ladder.

“I can start packing this week and maybe move in on the weekend?” She raised her eyebrows, waiting for my seal of approval.

“I’ll come help, too. You can’t do it all on your own, babe.”

The next weekend, Danielle incorporated all of her pink knickknacks and pillows with my mostly brown interior. My sports memorabilia was quickly overtaken by her love of stuffed animals, something called Beanie Babies. They looked useless to me, but who was I to judge. My apartment was a shrine to Cleveland sports, and they hadn’t won a damn thing since before I was born.

Danielle gave her boss notice the day after we decided to move in together. She found a job at a hip new bar down the street and would be able to walk to work, and it allowed me to be close enough to keep an eye on her—more for her safety than my sanity.

I received a promotion at work too. I was now the assistant store manager. The company I worked for knew of my sales skills at my old job, and I hadn’t disappointed since my hiring. I was being groomed for the manager position and would replace someone in another location when an opening became available. I had skills when it came to selling people on an item, and I could always upsell them and get them to spend more than they had planned. Everything seemed to be going my way. A beautiful woman in my bed each night, a salaried job with bonuses, and life was looking up for the first time in what seemed like an eternity.

We never talked about marriage in the months following her moving in. I wanted to take the relationship as slow possible, but the universe had other plans…grander ones that were out of our control.

“Kayden, I’m late,” she said, walking out of the bathroom in her sexy teddy and rubbing lotion into her skin.

“For what?” I looked at her, confused by the statement.

“Dumbass, my period.” My stomach instantly flipped over as I sat against the headboard, staring at her in disbelief.

“You’re pregnant?” I was dumbfounded, and the dumb-ass label totally fit me in the moment. My mind started to race with the thought of a baby and how it would change our lives and eventually our relationship.

“I don’t know. I just know I was supposed to get my period days ago, and it never happened. I’ve always been regular and never missed a period before.” She crawled under the covers and faced me with her head lying on her pillow.

I probably looked like an idiot with a million emotions crossing my face at once—happiness, shock, amazement, and fear. Fear was the winning emotion at that moment. I know she was looking at me, waiting for my excitement, but I didn’t think we were ready to be parents. We both drank regularly and used drugs. I quit using coke on a regular basis, but we both smoked weed almost nightly to help us sleep. Sleep was something that was never easy for me to do, but the relaxation marijuana brought me helped me enter a peaceful slumber. It wasn’t the way I thought I’d bring a child into this world.

“Wow. I don’t know what else to say. What now?” I asked.

“I’ll make a doctor’s appointment and see if there is something else wrong. Let’s not get too worried until I hear what they have to say.” She rubbed my stomach, trying to offer me reassurance, but I knew Danielle. I knew she had to be a nervous wreck at the idea of a baby. She didn’t have a job that offered maternity leave, and she worked on her feet all day. It wasn’t the best job to have with a belly and body aches.

“Okay. Either way, I’m here for you. I love you, Danielle.” I kissed her lips and pulled her into my arms.

“I love you, too, Kayden.”

I held her in my arms that night and barely slept a wink. I stared at the ceiling for the entire night. I could tell you every spot and shape on that colorless surface. Were we ready to be parents? Could we be good parents? I didn’t want to bring a child into a relationship without being husband and wife. It was one thing I was old-fashioned about. I believed a child should be born in wedlock. I could understand why it happened a different way for others, but we didn’t have anything stopping us.

The doctor confirmed her suspicions the next day. We were going to be parents in a little over seven months. I’d thought about nothing else all day and came to terms with any fear that I had. We’d make the best out of the situation and show the baby all the love in the world. I’d always wanted children, but I’d thought they would be planned. “I know this isn’t romantic, but will you marry me? I love you, Danielle, and I want our child to be born into a family. Will you be mine?”

Tears formed in her eyes, and the corners of her lips crept up her face, causing her eyes to form little slits and allowing the drops to cascade down her face. “Oh, Kayden. I’d love to marry you, and I’ll be yours always.”

I kissed her lips, filled with all the love I felt and my joy to make her mine with a bundle of joy on the way. “Do you want a big wedding?” I prayed she’d say no. We had money saved up, but I felt we’d need that for when the baby arrived. We couldn’t live in this tiny apartment forever.

“No, I’d rather just elope or something. Just us. I don’t have a big family, and I stopped talking to my mom about the time I started dancing. I don’t give a fuck about anyone, and we need to save our money, Kayden.”

“I’ll do anything you want.” I meant those words. “The sooner, the better.” I wasn’t going to drag out the engagement and allow this relationship to fall apart. Usually, I learned my lessons the first time, and I tried never to repeat the mistake again.

“I don’t see a reason to wait. I can’t believe I’m going to be Mrs. Kayden Michaels.” She seemed proud when saying our names mingled together.

“You’ll be mine. How about a honeymoon?” I asked. We could both use a little time off and get away from the real world for a while.

“I’ve always wanted to go to the Poconos. Is that okay?”

“Anything you want. I’ll make the reservations.”

Within two weeks, we were standing in front of the justice of the peace saying our vows. Getting married at the courthouse wasn’t the large, drawn-out production I’d become accustomed to attending. It took under five minutes for him to go through the lines and for us to repeat them, sealing the deal and officially making us husband and wife. We were legally bound together. It was a shotgun wedding, but the impending birth of our child made me take the leap that I’d avoided with Bridget, and for that, I was grateful.

“What are you doing?” Danielle screeched as I scooped her up into my arms.

“Carrying you over the threshold.” I didn’t think of myself as a romantic, but I knew it was a custom. She wrapped her arms around my neck as I opened the front door, and she kissed my cheeks as I carried her into the apartment.

“We have a couple of hours before we leave for Pennsylvania. What do you want to do?” I only had one thing on my mind. I wanted to make love to my wife. I wanted to consummate the relationship.

“I’m going to consume you, ravish you, and make you sore.” Her head fell back, and her body went limp.

“You know just the right thing to say to me to make my entire body quiver at the thought.” I made passionate love to her. I did it face-to-face at an excruciatingly slow pace. I savored every inch of her body and stayed nestled inside her for over an hour.

We were spending the following three days shacked up in a beautiful room in the Poconos. When I was a kid, it was the hip and trendy place to go for a romantic weekend. I remember hearing the adults talking about their weekend escapes. The room had a large champagne glass that doubled as a hot tub and a heart-shaped bed with mirrors on the ceiling. It wouldn’t have been my first choice, but it was what Danielle wanted.

Getting away from our real life, even if for a short time, was such a stress-reliever. The pressure at work had increased and getting the days off had been difficult, but I didn’t really give them an option. A weekend in bed with Danielle was exactly what I needed.

I had this intense need to claim every inch of her body. How to broach the topic with her? She was on top of me, kissing my lips and grinding her pussy against my cock. I pushed her away a bit, wanting to see her face when I brought up the subject. “I want to claim all of you. I want to know I’ve laid my seed in every available part of your body.” All the blood drained from her face.

“Oh, I don’t know, Kayden.” She started to move off of me, but I held her on top of me, keeping her close.

“I promise I won’t hurt you, babe.” I would do everything in my power for it to be pleasurable for her. “I’ll go slow and be gentle.” She gnawed on her lips and stared at me with puppy-dog eyes. “Have I ever hurt you?”

She shook her head, “No.”

“When it becomes too much, just say the word, and I’ll stop. I promise.” I pulled her face down to mine and sucked her lip into my mouth. I ran my hands over her hair and trailed my fingertips across her back. I touched her everywhere with my hands. I could never get enough of her skin, the smell, the feel, everything about it. I licked the flesh of her neck down to her breast. I spent time sucking and licking her tits. I needed her really turned on for this to be pleasurable for her. I grabbed her ass and touched her puckered hole, and I knew it wouldn’t be an easy process. She moaned at the sensation of my fingers touching her. She was tight and nervous. I had to find a way to relax her and get her used to something smaller before putting my cock inside her.

I moved Danielle off of me and onto the bed, placing her on her stomach. I could see her body instantly tense and become stiff. “Not yet, baby. Relax.” I stood on the bed above her and reached down and pulled her hips into the air. She was like putty in my hands, and she moved with ease. I rubbed my cock through her wetness before sliding it inside her pussy. I didn’t move immediately, dragging my fingers across her lips, collecting lubrication for my fingers. I moved slowly at first while rubbing the moisture from my fingers on her tight hole. I could feel it convulse under my fingertips. I increased the speed of my cock thrusting inside of her, filling her mind with nothing but lust and my cock. I pushed lightly, waiting for it to yield to the pressure. I pushed deeper as I felt the muscles relax, and her body shook from the sensation. She yelped, but it was quickly followed by a moan.

I worked my finger and my cock in unison, confusing her mind with the sensations and erasing any pain she might have been feeling. I moved my finger, twisting it as I pulled out, expanding the size and stretching her. I needed more lube to work in a second finger, but nothing was close at hand, and I couldn’t stop. I dropped saliva from my lips, letting it fall and plop onto her ass, running down her crack and onto my fingers. I withdrew my finger and heard a slight whimper. I rubbed both fingers through the saliva before inserting a single digit again. I slowly worked in the second. Her body pulled away, but I held her in place with my free hand. Her movement stopped, and she moaned. Her face was turned sideways on the bed, and I could see the expression on her face change. She was on the edge, close to orgasm, but I wanted to make her come with my cock in her ass.

I slowed my rhythm, not letting her fall over the cliff of ecstasy, before withdrawing my cock from her quivering core. “Stay there,” I said, smacking her on the ass. She stayed still, not moving a muscle. She didn’t even turn her head to see what I was doing. She had to be a jumbled mess and filled with worry. I grabbed a bottle of lube off the floor. I filled my palm with the silky fluid and palmed my cock, rubbing it over every inch and ridge. I held the bottle against her ass and squeezed a generous amount, letting it dribble down her crack, over her hole, and drip off her pussy onto the sheets. I threw the bottle on the bed and stroked my cock, paying attention to covering the tip.

I placed my hand on her ass and spread her, giving me easier access. I rubbed the liquid on her hole and used my fingers to spread it inside her. I pulled my fingers out and grabbed my cock and rubbed it against her hole, pushing gently. “Relax, sweetheart. Didn’t my fingers feel good?”

“Yes,” she said all breathy but with shakiness in her voice.

“Relax, and it will slide right in.” I knew I was lying. It wouldn’t slide right in without effort on my part, but it would go in. I started with just the head, and I could feel her ass squeeze my cock with so much force I almost came on the spot. I stopped moving to let her body adjust to my size. “Are you okay?” I rubbed my hands down the skin on her back.

“Yes, I think so. Just give me a minute.” She held her breath and blew it out slowly. When she exhaled, her ass released, and I started to inch in slowly.

“It’ll get easier. I promise it will feel good.” I seated my cock inside her fully, and the strength of the muscles inside her was like a vise squeezing the life out of me. I arched my back, laying my body against hers. I wrapped my arm around her waist and stroked her clit, rubbing it just the right way to make her world explode. With each swirl of her clit, she became more relaxed.

“Fuck, yes,” she moaned. “Don’t stop. Oh God.”

“So damn tight. I fucking love your ass.” I applied more pressure, shrinking the size of the tiny circles I made on her skin. I moved slowly inside her, quick on the out and slow on the in. I relished the feel and concentrated on the movement of my hands, trying to draw out my release.

Her body tightened, every muscle became rigid, and the sounds coming out of her mouth were the sexiest I’d ever heard. I started to squeeze her clit lightly with a rhythmic, pulsating motion. Her eyes rolled back in her head, and her mouth grew slack. I didn’t think her ass could get any tighter, but it put me over the edge.

“Fuck.” My movement stopped as a tremor overcame every muscle in my body. The experience was so intense I became powerless in the moment. My rhythm turned jerky as her body writhed beneath mine.

“Oh my God. Ohh…” she moaned into the sheets.

I collapsed on top of her. Our bodies were slick with sweat, and I’d now claimed every inch of her. I’d left no stone unturned and no surface untouched in my conquest of her body. I waited for the swelling of my cock to subside before removing it.

“Ouch,” she said as I pulled her with me onto our backs. She rested her head on my chest, and I lay there, unable to speak. My breath was ragged, and my heart hammered at a rapid pace, beating against the walls of my chest. My legs felt like rubber, and my entire body was a puddle of goo.

“I’m sorry, love. Did it hurt too much?” I ran my fingers through her hair, rubbing her scalp.

“Not too much. I don’t think I’ve ever come so hard in all my life. Damn. Kind of threw me for a loop.”

“So, we can do it again?” I asked with a grin on my face.

“Not now.”

“I know, babe. Someday?” I wanted to make sure I didn’t shut that door forever. It was too good to wall it up and never be granted access again.

“Someday.” She still hadn’t moved, and I watched her chest shift up and down as her breathing slowed.

“I don’t want to go home tomorrow,” she said, stroking my legs.

“Me either, but we’ll go away and do something before the baby is born.” I knew life would never be the same once the bundle of joy arrived. No more days or nights of marathon sex. They would be filled with feedings and diaper changes.

She rubbed her stomach, resting her hands across her abdomen. “I can’t believe I’m pregnant. The doctor always made me think it would be almost impossible.”

My life seemed to be filled with the impossible becoming reality. I was happy about the upcoming birth of our child. It brought us together and sealed our future in a way I was too chickenshit to face.

“We have so much to do.” My mind got so overwhelmed when I thought about all the things we needed to do to get ready for a baby. We didn’t know the gender, and we didn’t want to know. I, we, wanted to be surprised. It should end like it started.

“One step at a time. We’ll be ready.”

I placed my hand on her belly, and I could feel her heartbeat. There was a tiny piece of us alive inside her, and I was in awe. I don’t think my mind would truly be able to comprehend the reality until I held the baby in my arms. “You’ve got to stay clean, Danielle.” I knew I didn’t have to say the words to her, but I couldn’t help myself.

“I know, but I can’t do it without you. We both have to stay clean.” She looked up at me with pleading eyes.

“I will.” I meant those words. It had been years since I’d led a clean lifestyle, but for the future of my child and my family, I would try my hardest. Danielle drifted off to sleep in my arms, resting against my skin. I moved her off me and put a pillow under her head. She looked so peaceful, and the hard living disappeared off her face during sleep. I rubbed my fingers across her belly and put my face up to her stomach. I had so much to say, so much I wanted this baby to know.

“Daddy loves you. I’ll be the daddy you deserve.” I needed to get my shit together and get my addictions in check. “I can’t wait to meet you, but take your time.” I laughed quietly with those words. I lay down next to her body and pulled her into my arms. I laid her back against my front and held her stomach until I drifted off to sleep. Life was looking up for the first time in longer than I could remember.

Danielle and I cleaned up our acts after we found out we were going to be parents. We helped each other through withdrawal and the cravings. When I thought my life had finally turned around…God had other plans. Who knows why things happen in life? Is there an ultimate plan, is it written in the stars, and are we predestined? I don’t know about any of that bullshit, but I know we have no control over our lives at times. Even the best-laid plans can fall apart and lie in tatters at our feet.