Chapter7
The last thing Aaliyah could remember was the loud bang that her body had made as it slammed against the car. She could remember feeling like her whole body had exploded, and then nothingness. The next thing she knew, she was waking up in an immense amount of pain and a flurry of activity was happening around her.
“Well, good morning, sleepyhead! It’s nice to see you awake.”
Aaliyah tried to mumble something, but her mind was foggy and she couldn’t seem to be able to make her mouth move.
“You’ve got a lot of pain killers in you, sweetie, so just sit back and relax for a bit while your mind clears. I’ll go get your doctor.”
Her mind spun in circles as the nurse’s words rang through her head. Painkillers, doctors–how long had she been sleeping?
“Ah, good to see you awake,” a voice came from the doorway.
Turning, she felt every muscle twitch with pain, and she couldn’t help but wince.
“Yeah, I’m sure you’re in a good amount of pain, but luckily the pain killers are at least taking the edge off.”
She liked the kindness she heard in his voice, the lightness with which he came into the room. It made her feel slightly more at ease, which was good considering just how confused and scared she was. The doctor came to her bed and grabbed her chart off of the end, scanning her details. While he observed her, she observed him, noticing that he was on the older side, probably in his sixties, with a pot belly and white hair that stood up in tufts. When he finally looked up, she had already decided that she liked the man.
As if it was nothing more than routine, he introduced himself as Dr. Cavanaugh and started to check her pupils and do things that any ordinary doctor would do during an exam. If it hadn’t been for the pain and the constant beep of the monitors, she might have even forgotten that she was in the hospital. But reality hit when he pulled up a chair to her bedside and sat down next to her.
“Aaliyah, what do you remember?”
She answered him, though she didn’t have many details to give him other than her body feeling like it had been shattered and the sickening noise that was on replay in her mind.
“Well, then let’s talk about what happened. You were hit by a car that ran a red light at an intersection. You were unconscious for a day on your own, and when you started to come around, we kept more drugs in your system to get you through some of the pain, but we needed to start weening you off of them so that we could start monitoring some things.”
This was a lot for a drug-hazed brain to understand, but she was trying to keep up.
“You have a broken leg at your femur, which is impressive since it’s the hardest bone in the body. You also have a couple broken ribs, which unfortunately, all we can do is give you pain killers for. The rest of the pain you are feeling is more bumps and bruises.”
Aaliyah let out a sigh of relief; a few broken bones was nothing too horrible, nothing she couldn’t handle, but then the doctor took a deep breath, and she knew something more was coming.
“The thing that we’re most worried about, though, is that your lower half doesn’t seem to be responding to stimuli.”
“Wait, what does that mean?” She knew she was drugged and confused, but it sounded like he’d said…
“What I’m trying to tell you is that your legs don’t respond to stimuli. We needed you to wake up so that we could test if you can move them voluntarily, although we already suspect we know the answer.”
With that, he stood up, went back to the end of the bed, and lifted her sheets.
“Can you move your right leg? How about wiggle your toes on either side?”
Aaliyah tried as hard as she could, and while her brain was telling her body to move, she could see that nothing was happening.
Dr. Cavanaugh nodded and didn’t look surprised. “That’s what we expected. Your spinal column is fine, nothing seems to be wrong there, so what we suspect is that you’ve had some serious head trauma that has affected your motor function in your legs.”
“So, what does that mean exactly?”
“That means that for right now, the lower part of your body is… paralyzed.”
Aaliyah’s whole world drained of everything, and all she could see was the doctor. How could he be telling her this? How could he be giving her news like this, making her world crash down around her, and using a world like paralyzed as if it was nothing?
“There have been positive outcomes in cases like this. Sometimes when the swelling goes down in that part of the brain and the patient utilizes physical therapy, function can be regained. There isn’t a guarantee that this will happen in your case; it’s very dependent on how much of the brain was damaged during trauma. But, with luck and hard work on your part, we can see what we can do.”
Tears sprang to Aaliyah’s eyes at his words. She may never regain function again? She was so young, her whole life ahead of her still, and there were no promises that she would ever walk again.
“Do you have any questions?” he prompted.
Of course I do, she thought. There were a million questions racing through her mind, but her brain couldn’t settle on just one at a time. Even if it could, her mouth certainly wasn’t forming the words that she needed. Dr. Cavanaugh seemed to understand and turned to walk out of the room.
“Why don’t you get some rest, and we can talk again a little later?”
Aaliyah leaned back onto her pillows, and a nurse came by and pressed a button on the machine. Aaliyah felt her body settle into an oozy feeling. She wanted to protest, but the nurse cut her off.
“Your brain needs the rest; trust us on this one.”
Aaliyah’s eyes became heavy and drifted closed, but she could still feel the tears slipping down her cheeks. She came back around before she opened her eyes and could hear the doctor talking to someone.
“So, she may never walk again?” She could recognize Eli’s voice immediately and felt something like relief loosen the knot in her stomach.
It had crept up on her, the feeling of feeling like she had someone who cared, like a parent would. She’d been alone for so long that she hadn’t remembered what it felt like, but hearing his voice reminded her of all of their chats in the mornings about Max, all of his concern for her. It made her feel safe knowing someone like Eli was looking out for her the way her father would if he was still alive.
“Well, it will depend on what the swelling damaged. If it hasn’t damaged her permanently, then there’s still going to be an uphill battle for her. It’s going to be painful and a lot of work.”
“I don’t care what it costs, and I don’t care who you have to bring in here, you will give her the best room and the best care possible. No expense spared for her, you got it?”
“Absolutely,” Dr. Cavanaugh answered.
After the two men stopped talking, Aaliyah counted to ten before opening her eyes. When she did, Eli was sitting by the window sill looking outside.
“Hey, Eli,” she whispered. It was still hard to talk, but she wanted him to know she was awake.
“Hey there, good to see you awake!”
His voice was full of enthusiasm that she knew he didn’t feel.
“You don’t have to pretend.” She lifted her body and tried to adjust into a more comfortable position. Eli jumped to give her a hand but looked completely lost as to what to do. So she waved him off and set herself better on the pillows. “I know that you know it’s not looking great for me.”
They both tried to smile, yet it didn’t reach either one of their eyes. “We’re going to do everything we can, I promise.”
Aaliyah nodded, wishing she felt as assured as she was pretending. She needed to change the topic, to think of anything else other than her legs.
“Where did all of these pretty flowers come from?”
Eli smiled, grateful for the change of topic, and fingered the petals of one of the bouquets. “This one is from me, the cookies are from your friend Caroline, and Max sent the roses.”
Aaliyah arched her eyebrow and winced, even that hurt a bit. “Are they actually from him, or are they from you for him?”
The smile on Eli’s face showed Aaliyah he’d been caught. “He did come to see you last night, though. That’s true.”
Something twisted inside of Aaliyah, and she couldn’t tell what it was. Max had actually come to see her, that seemed pretty big, and a part of her was almost giddy that he had. It was the best news she’d gotten since she’d woken up. But then there was the other side of things—that for Max this was all fake. He had probably needed to show up. How would it have looked to the media if he hadn’t? That thought took all of the wind from her sails.
“Well, I’m sure he had to fill his obligation,” she answered. Bitterness tasted awful on her tongue.
Eli tried to smile, even tried to assure her that that wasn’t the case; that he’d been worried about her and had wanted to come. But she could hear the hollowness in his voice.
I’m sure he’ll be by later today.” Eli grabbed his coat off the back of the chair. “They’re going to be moving you soon to a better room, something a little more comfortable. I’ve got to get to the office and take care of some things. Get some rest, and I’ll be back later to check on you.”
Aaliyah offered a smile and watched Eli walk out of the room. She wished that she felt even a fraction of the smile she was trying to put out, but it felt impossible. The fact that she may never walk again kept creeping into her mind, but she felt as if it wasn’t actually seeping in. Like it was staying just in the shadows of her reality and wouldn’t sink any further. She didn’t want to think about it, couldn’t think about it. All she could hope for was that her brain would make her better, that it would take the swelling down and everything would be okay again.
Then her mind flitted toward Max. She didn’t know where along the lines of the past few weeks she had started thinking about him more than just in terms of the contract, but she realized how lonely she felt and knew that she wished he was sitting in the room with her. He drove her absolutely crazy most of the time, and they fought constantly, but sitting there alone and scared, she knew he was the person she wanted sitting next to her. It was exactly what Eli had warned her about, wanting Max for more than what he was. She closed her eyes and wished herself back to sleep. There was a very real feeling inside of her that she was going to be hurt in more ways than just her legs when all of this was over.