It had been weeks since I’d seen Sarabelle, and Lexi had been ignoring me ever since the night of the gala. I’d called her multiple times, left a number of voicemails and sent too many text messages to count. Every form of contact I’d tried to use had failed.

The last time I’d seen her was at the gala and the way the night ended left far more questions than answers in my mind. Specifically, why did she kiss me the way she did? It had to mean something, didn’t it?

If I kiss a girl, it’s typically because I like her. Unfortunately, Lexi has always been a bit on the wild side so those rules don’t necessarily apply to her.

Honestly, I wasn’t surprised that Lexi was avoiding me. She is a professional at avoiding situations until she is ready to deal with them. Sarabelle, on the other hand, left me scratching my head. She and I rarely went a full day without a call or a text message. It’s just who we are and we’d been doing it for a long time.

All of a sudden, all I heard from her was radio silence. Admittedly, I hadn’t been calling or texting her like I normally had because my mind had been on Lexi. Still, even when I didn’t call or text her, she’d usually send me a message before she went to bed.

As more time went on without me hearing from either sister, I started to worry about them. I figured the best thing for me to do was to take a drive over to their house to check on them. Pulling into the driveway, everything seemed to be in order which made me feel somewhat better.

I rang the doorbell and waited. Nothing happened. I was starting to get worried all over again. I had almost hoped that I’d come over to find a broken window, a busted door jam, or something. I continued to knock and ring the doorbell, hoping that maybe they just couldn’t hear me. Just as I was about to leave, the door opened.

Lexi was standing in front of me, looking disheveled. Her usually kempt blond hair was disarrayed in clumpy knots and her skin looked pale and lifeless. Any time I’ve ever seen her, she has always had her eyes all done and lipstick, but not this day. She appeared ashen and her sparkling blue eyes had lost their twinkle. Lexi looked sad.

“Oh, hey Liam,” she said looking at the floor, holding the door open so I could come in. “Sarabelle’s not here right now.”

“That’s okay. I was actually coming by to check on the two of you. I haven’t heard from her in a while and, well, you haven’t responded to any of my calls or messages.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” she said nonchalantly. “Sarabelle’s got a new boyfriend and I’ve had quite a bit on my mind.”

As she turned toward the kitchen, the light hit her face just right and I could tell she’d been crying. Her red, puffy eyes were so swollen that they were almost little slits, and she was sniffling.

“Lexi, are you okay?” I asked.

“Yeah, I'm all right. Just been making bad decisions as always. They just caught up with me this time.”

“What do you mean? Did something happen?”

“Yeah, but it doesn't matter.”

“It sounds pretty important,” I insisted. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Listen, Liam, it’s really sweet that you want to help but it’s my situation to deal with and I really don’t want to talk about it. Drop it. Okay?”

“I guess so. I just worry about you and your sister sometimes. If there’s ever anything you need, just let me know.”

“I will and I’ll also tell Sarabelle you stopped by.”

I turned and started to walk towards the door when Lexi sat down on the couch and started talking to me again.

“You know, I’ve been self-destructive for as long as I can remember,” she said, holding back tears. I closed the tall, heavy-wood door and walked back over to the couch, sitting down beside her as I sunk down into the oversized leather couch.

“Yeah, you’ve definitely made some questionable choices over the years but that’s always been part of who you were. Why are you saying that you’re self-destructive? What’s going on?”

“Oh, it’s not that I think I’ve been self-destructive, it’s that I know I have. Everything I’ve done has been intentional. This whole bad girl persona is one that I’ve created.”

“But why? Why would you want to create a persona that isn’t you?”

“Oh, it’s me. It’s all me. I was always the sweet, quiet kid. When my parents died, I had to do something different. It was time to let the wild side of me come alive.”

“Did you feel like your parents were holding you back or something? Were they not letting you do what you wanted to do when they were alive? I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

“No Liam, everything I did was to rebel against my parents. I know it doesn’t make any sense but they raised me to be the opposite of what I’ve become. I did this to get back at my mom and dad for leaving me. It’s some kind of sick and twisted revenge that doesn’t even matter. It’s not like either one of them are here to see me acting like this.”

“So what’s stopping you from going back to the girl you were before?”

“Don’t you see? That Lexi doesn’t exist anymore. She died right alongside my parents. “

It hurt me to see her in this much pain. She started bawling as she buried her face into my chest. Until the night of the gala, I’d never seen her show the slightest inkling of emotion.

Now, she was crying so hard, I thought she was going to hyperventilate. I did the only thing I could think of and wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in close to me. Much to my surprise, she didn’t try to back away. That was fine with me.

The longer she cried, the more I got the feeling that there was something else going on. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something had happened that she wasn’t willing to share with me.

I was glad that she was allowing me to see this vulnerable side of her but I’d known Lexi for years and I knew that this was not the real her. She’s always so confident and proud. The way she was acting was strange. I made it a point to get to the bottom of it.

I let her cry until she got it out of her system. She seemed embarrassed that I’d seen her in such a vulnerable state but she didn’t need to be. I was honored that she felt comfortable enough with me to open up about why she’s the way she is.

Not wanting to leave her alone while she was so upset, I hung out with her and we decided to watch a movie. I continued to hold her and caress her hair as I stroked her shoulder. I could feel us bonding and getting closer.

For the first time, I could feel our relationship beginning to blossom into something solid instead of the superficial relationship we’d always had.