Allison
It’d been several weeks since Allison had lunch with Leonardo that first time. But she accepted that it’d likely be months if ever that she’d stop experiencing what she did every time she walked into the gym now. The accelerated heartbeat. Her insides spinning faster and more out of control with every step she took into the gym. She thought it might calm with time, but each time it only got worse.
Fortunately, with Lila being so incredibly busy promoting her upcoming fight, she was gone too often to question or worry about Allison’s social life. Not that Allison had much of one. But she’d worked out a perfectly synchronized gym schedule that often led to her running into Leo. For starters, she made sure her time there was only when Lila wouldn’t be, which was a lot lately. She also tried to mingle with other gym members and trainers, both female and male alike. She hoped it’d make it less obvious who was hands down the only one responsible for her motivation to be there as often as she was now. If it ever got back to Lila that she’d been seen chatting with the work-release guys, Allison would be able to retort how many others she often chatted with as well.
Her sister knew Allison was far more social than she’d ever been. So, if it should ever get back to her, it shouldn’t surprise her. Allison was ready with all her “I’m an adult” and “Everyone deserves a second chance to prove themselves” rebuttals to anything Lila might throw at her about her continued connection with Leonardo. But so far, none had been necessary. Poor Lila was just too consumed with everything going on in her own busy life. Allison was determined not to give her more to deal with. But she just couldn’t bring herself to stop feeding that temptation to see him again as often as she could.
It didn’t happen every day because that’d be too obvious. But at least twice a week now she and Leonardo just so happened to run into each other around his lunch time. They’d grabbed a few more tacos and burgers from the other place across the street a few times now, each time getting to know each other a little better. He was still so hot and cold, but as nerve-wracking as it still was every single time they spent any time together, it did feel as if they’d begun to build an unlikely camaraderie of sorts.
Allison wasn’t even sure what she was hoping for. She wasn’t sure yet if even considering anything with a man who said women were poison was wise. All she knew was she couldn’t get enough of what he did to her now, especially when he looked at her as he often did. After several weeks, she was convinced now she wasn’t just imagining it anymore. She did something to him too.
As hard and as cold as he could go, it was happening less and less. She was seeing more of the lighthearted side of Leonardo each time they chatted.
“Look.” She smiled big as she walked up to Leonardo, instantly losing herself in his intense eyes.
She handed him her phone so he could read the main headline of the latest edition of her school’s online paper. “I finally made the front page, and it was the story on the work-release program that got me there. So, I wanted to thank you.”
As he’d been doing more and more lately, Leonardo gazed in her eyes for a long moment without saying anything, before taking the phone with a smile. Allison breathed in deeply, trying to calm her racing heart, but it was becoming increasingly harder to do so. Each time she was near him now, it became clearer that whatever rules, restrictions, or walls he’d initially put up when it came to her were slowly coming down.
Allison assumed he was reading more than just the headline since he was quiet for a few long moments. “Thank me?” He finally looked up from his phone. “You wrote the story. Stuck to your guns until you finally had all the answers you needed. You earned this, Ali, and it’s well deserved. Congrats. You should celebrate.”
She smiled, taking the phone when he handed it back. “Thank you,” she said as she walked alongside him.
“This is gonna sound like a weird question.” The comment had Allison looking up at him curiously. “You don’t have drug paraphernalia or weapons in your car, do you?”
Allison peered at him, puzzled by the question but even more surprised to see the man laugh for the first time ever.
He shook his head. “You’re too much, Ali.”
Apparently, her expression was as befuddled as she’d felt. Allison laughed now too, warmed by the sweetness in his eyes, despite the odd turn their conversation had taken. “Why would you ask me that?”
“I’ve been hearing good things about that new seafood place on Lorena,” he explained, still smiling big as they walked out the front door. “Haven’t tried it but just now had a thought. Maybe we could go check it out for lunch to celebrate your story making the front page. Only I can’t have you on my bike without a helmet. Can’t chance getting pulled over. It’s not far from here but not close enough to walk there and back in under an hour. So, I was thinking, if you want, we can go in your car. You just can’t have anything in your car that violates my probation. So, no mace or bongs?”
“No.” Allison laughed nervously, even as her insides went a little nuts.
Silly as it sounded, despite them having lunch together on several occasions now, driving to a sit-down kind of restaurant where they wouldn’t be ordering at a window made it feel more formal—almost like a date—since he did say they’d be celebrating. Clearing her throat, she nodded, gesturing toward where her car was parked.
“I have nothing illegal in my car or even legal like pepper spray. Even though I do own a bottle, I just don’t have it on me today.”
“Bongs are legal in California now,” he said with a smirk. “I just can’t be around that shit, not while I’m on probation anyway. You’re free to smoke away though, just not around me.”
“Are you kidding? My sister would kill me.”
“Why? It’s just like alcohol now,” he said as they reached her car. “As long as you use it responsibly, you’re good.”
They got in her car, and it was almost comical how big he looked in it. The only other person usually in her car with her these days was Jen, and she was tiny compared to him.
Allison hated to remind him because she got the feeling their age difference was a big deal to him. But she figured he’d known how old she was almost from day one and a number didn’t define your maturity. Rodney was a perfect example of that. He was now Leo’s former work-release partner. Leo had since requested to be switched because as he’d explained, he just couldn’t deal with the guy’s immature ass.
“It may be legal, but I can’t even drink alcohol legally yet, so weed is out of the question for me as well. You got a taste of what my sister’s like.” She grinned, feeling evil, but even he smirked at the comment. “She’d literally kick my ass if she ever found out I was doing anything illegal.”
“Is that right?” He turned to her curiously, just another one of the many expressions she’d been privy to now from this otherwise reserved and once utterly mysterious man. “I’ve been meaning to ask you. I know she didn’t like me—at all—that first day. She know we’re . . .?”
He glanced out the window, pausing for a moment, but that last word nearly stopped Allison’s heart. We’re what?
Before her mind could even finish the thought, he finished his comment. “She know we’re still in touch?”
Gulping, Allison put on her sunglasses. This time she did the stalling before responding. Over the years because of her sister’s unpredictable reactions to so many things, Allison had gotten good at stalling for a few moments to think over her answers to some of Lila’s questions. In this case, she feigned having to concentrate extra hard on backing out of the parking stall.
“Ali?”
“Hmm?”
Rubbernecking all the way around now to make a good show of her need to focus, Allison’s mind raced for an appropriate way to respond.
“She doesn’t know, does she?”
Glad for the dark sunglasses, Allison turned to face him as she finished pulling out of the parking space. “She hasn’t been home much these past few weeks,” Allison said very matter-of-factly, as she brought her eyes back to her driving, and lifted her chin. “And when she has been, our conversations have been mainly about her upcoming fight and her modeling shoots. Her life has changed so drastically in the past few months. So, yeah, I don’t think I’ve mentioned it.”
She refused to turn to him, and for once since she’d started talking to him, she couldn’t quite make out what felt like a sudden change in mood. His overwhelming presence was such a large part of that car now Allison could literally feel him tense. At least it was what his sitting up a little straighter felt like to her. Only thing she was sure of was he likely didn’t buy her not thinking she’d mentioned it. He knew damn well—as well as she did anyway—that she knew she hadn’t. Was he mad? Insulted? Hurt?
His chuckling surprised her. They reached a stop, and she turned to him, but he was looking out his window. “What?” He shook his head, still glancing out the window but didn’t say anything. “What?”
He turned to her with one of those big beautiful smiles that made her heart flip. “Nothing.”
Allison felt her brow arch a bit defensively. Was that a sarcastic chuckle aimed at Lila? So what if she’d kept it from her sister. He had no idea why she wouldn’t want to add to her sister’s worry.
“Something’s amusing?” she asked as she pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant.
“I just think it’s cute that you’d be afraid to tell her.”
“I’m not afraid.” Allison was aware she sounded a little too defensive, but it was the truth. “I just know she’d worry. I told you she worries about everything when it comes to me.”
Allison had already told him about being orphaned at a young age. That it’d been just her and Lila for years. Though they hadn’t gotten too deep into it, he did know how close she and her sister were. So, he had to understand this.
“She’d be right to worry about this.”
Allison turned to him, confused. “About what?”
“Running with the wrong people—wrong crowd—is one of the top reasons people end up in trouble.”
His expression was a strange one. It was relaxed enough, and he didn’t seem upset or anything, but there was something strained about it, despite the slight smirk he still wore.
“Look it up,” he added as if she might not believe him. “It’s well documented.”
“Having an occasional lunch with you isn’t running with you,” she said, feeling that familiar flutter in her belly. “And I don’t think of you as the wrong people or crowd. You said you’ve learned from your mistakes, and you’re obviously trying to better yourself. It’s the first thing I’d point out if Lila ever had an issue with my . . . staying in touch with you.”
Talking about this made her insanely nervous. It was like they were actually addressing what was happening when, so far, they’d both been pretending what they were doing was meaningless. Something that just happened on a whim. Not something either of them looked forward to and thought of constantly given the continued moments that kept happening.
“I’m just saying,” he said as he opened his door. “I’d be more surprised if she didn’t have an issue with it.”
They got out of the car and walked around it to the restaurant’s entrance. The reminder that it was more of a sit-down restaurant than a fast food place like the others they’d frequented so far had the flutters in her belly going again. Seeing a few of the regulars from the gym made her a little nervous. This would be more than just grabbing a bite to eat if she ever had to explain it to Lila. But just as quickly, her belly was doing the fluttering again.
Simple things like hearing the waiter say, “Table for two,” and then their eyes meeting as they sat down across from each other were way more exciting than Allison knew they should be. The waiter gave them menus then took their drink orders and left to fetch them. Someone else dropped off water and chips and salsa.
“Let me see that article again.”
Leo held out his hand. Allison cued it up on her phone screen and handed him her phone. As usual, it made her nervous to watch someone read anything she wrote, so she focused on the menu instead. She heard him chuckle. “Intimidating but gentle giant?”
Surprised that he was already at that part, she glanced over her menu with a smile, even as her cheeks heated. “You’re already there? You read fast.”
“When you’re locked up, it’s the one thing you do most.”
He went back to reading, and she went back to her menu, reaching out for a chip and dipping it in the salsa every now and again. She was trying to decide between the garlic shrimp or the chipotle crab cakes.
“What did your sister say about the front-page article?”
“Haven’t told her.”
The moment the words were out, she wished she could take them back. Allison had since mentioned on more than one occasion how huge it would be to get a front-page story. How much she’d been wanting this and how Lila was her biggest cheerleader assuring her it’d happen. She may not have gotten too intimate in their conversations yet, but if he knew anything about her, it was how close she and Lila were. She glanced over her menu, and sure enough, he was peering at her.
“You haven’t told her?”
Of course, he’d be surprised she told him first. “She won’t be home until later.” She glanced back down at her menu. “I don’t wanna tell her. I wanna show her.”
That was partially true; though Allison knew she’d put off calling Lila in her haste to tell Leo about it. She knew full well she could easily show her by including a link to the story in a text.
She took a quick sip of the water the waiter had since dropped off. “I just wish the timing had been different,” she said, trying to steer the conversation in another direction.
“You mean that this hadn’t happened when everything is happening for her?”
“No.” She shook her head, surprised by his interpretation of this. “Not even close. It’s just that everyone knows about the ongoing head butting Carson and I do, have been doing since—”
“Who’s Carson?”
“My editor,” she explained, grabbing another chip. “I told you, on top of the fact that he’s been so hard to impress, he and I get into it a lot. The whole class has been witness to many of our debates. Then he and I—”
She caught herself before saying it, nearly choking on her chip in the process. Taking a sip of her water again, she coughed then cleared her throat, pointing at her neck, explaining the obvious. “Went down the wrong way.”
Glancing back at her menu, she tried to reason that his asking so immediately who Carson was didn’t mean anything. He just needed clarification before she went on with her story. That was perfectly reasonable. She was being ridiculous to think he’d care either way about what she’d almost said without thinking. “The chipotle crab cakes look good.”
“You didn’t finish,” he said, and she glanced over her menu, stupidly pretending not to understand. “You and Carson what?”
As innocuous as his tone was, there was something just slightly demanding about his inquiry.
“Oh.” She shook her head. “I’m just being paranoid because it’s my first front-page story.”
“Paranoid about what?”
Taking a breath, she decided to just say it. What was the big deal? She really was being ridiculous in assuming he’d be even the slightest bit annoyed with hearing about her night out with Carson. A few days prior when she arrived at the gym, she’d been witness to him chatting with one of the female trainers notorious for flirting. For once, Allison was glad for his broodiness because he didn’t appear to appreciate being bothered while he was trying to train. But then it happened. The girl said something then giggled loudly about it. While it wasn’t nearly as beautiful as some of the smiles Allison had been treated to, he cracked a smile, shook his head, and then said something to the girl that had her twirling her hair with her finger and smiling a little too big. Never in her life had Allison experienced what scathing jealousy felt like.
It was ugly.
So, it was only for that reason that she’d prefer to spare anyone feeling even remotely what she had. But again, she reasoned it was very unlikely that he was feeling anything close to the silly butterflies she felt around him. Swallowing hard, she put her menu down, watching as he tried to fish a piece of avocado out of the salsa with his chip. “We had dinner just a few weeks ago for the first time ever, and then next thing you know I get a front-page story.”
The movement of his chip in the salsa bowl slowed almost to a standstill. She glanced up at his face, but he was still staring at the chip. “A romantic dinner?”
He finally gave up on the avocado and bit into the chip with just the salsa. His eyes were on hers now, vacant of any emotion; though the intensity was ever present. Allison’s mind raced. While the dinner hadn’t been a romantic one, her relationship with Carson had definitely changed since then. Her concern over the timeline of that happening and her story making the front page was a valid one.
Allison knew what she’d be up against should she ever get her hopes up about anything happening between her and Leo. Already his continuing to allow even a friendship between them was a surprise. Being completely honest about this now would only pile on more reasons for him to steer clear of anything more than even this unlikely friendship between them. She risked having him cut her off altogether. Only Allison’s heart yearned for even a sign of what she’d begun to suspect: that he too was beginning to feel for her the insanity she’d begun feeling for him weeks ago.
Did she dare be completely honest and see how he reacted? Or should she be vague, tone it down considerably, and not risk his possibly going back to ignoring her again?
Chewing the corner of her lip, she took a deep breath, feeling her heart thud against her chest as her head continued to debate.