Chapter 17

Brooke

As I drive to Landon’s house, rain pelts my windshield. My mind races, struggling to process everything he shared. I feel like I understand him so much more. I can’t imagine the pain he’s been living with. Guilt torments me about giving him such a hard time in the past. But I didn’t know. How in the world could I have known?

In my mind, I see the beautiful woman in the pictures, his late wife, Carla. The tragedy of what happened breaks my heart. I wish I would’ve been more understanding. But he guarded his heart…his soul. He never let anyone in, least of all me.

As I turn down his street, I wonder why he told the twisted tale. Maybe he does care about me. There could be no other explanation for opening up the way he did. Otherwise, Landon seems like the kind of guy who might have taken his secret to the grave.

I park in front of his house and take a deep breath. The combination of Landon’s past and the rain makes me want to cry. I know that Carla took her last breath on a rainy day. I try to pull myself together. I have to be strong for him.

I get out of the car and trot to the front door. Before I even knock, the door swings open and Landon stands there. The look in his eyes breaks my heart all over again. Before I can stop myself, I leap into his arms.

“Landon…” I moan, nuzzling his neck.

He holds me close, squeezing me tight. Over his shoulder, I glance out the large picture window and gaze at the melting lake. It’s gorgeous this time of year, the fading light dancing across the lapping waves. Something about the scenery makes me want to indulge in it, breathe it in just like I’m breathing in the man. Maybe Landon’s what I need. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

We cling to each other for a long time. I feel at home in his arms. As much as I’m attracted to him, this isn’t a sexual feeling. It’s more like a fierce connection of our souls.

He pulls away and looks into my eyes. “How about some tea?”

I grin. “Do you remember how I like it?”

“Oh, I know just how you like it.” I smirk at his innuendo as I follow him into the kitchen. Before I know it, a ragged breath fills the air. Is that mine? Judging by the flood of wetness in my panties, it is. He fills a kettle with water and puts it on the stove burner. He grabs the loose-leaf tea out of the cabinet. “I haven’t had any of this since that day.”

I smile, remembering. Remembering everything. “I’m surprised. If I lived here, I’d drink it every morning.”

He grins.

If I lived here? Did I really say that out loud? Slow down, Brooke. It’s way too soon for that kind of talk.

“A little sugar, like last time?” He looks over at me, laying it out there.

“Yeah, you remember.”

“Brooke, everything about you is impossible to forget. Every breath, every word, every touch is burned on my memory.” As if he didn’t string a series of beautiful words together like nothing, Landon adds raw sugar to two mugs and the tea. After pouring the steaming hot water, he makes his way over to me. “I really didn’t feel like company, but I don’t think I could ever turn you down.”

I take the mug he hands me and lift it to my nose, breathing it in. “Thanks.” I take a cautious sip. “Wow, it’s good.”

“I’ll take that as a good sign.” He sits across from me, and I gaze at him from underneath my eyelashes. Looking at him is done at my own peril. It’s dangerous. He’s dangerous. I could fall in love with him.

“It’s even better than last time.”

We lock eyes. There’s so much I want to say, but I’m not sure how to put my thoughts into words. His brand of sexy chips away at my resolve, digging into the raw wounds of my past until I feel cracked wide open.

“Yeah, definitely better.” I take another sip, but it doesn’t fortify me like I intended.

“There’s something about you, Brooke. I just feel like I can open up to you about anything. Maybe it’s because you called me a douchebag and an asshole the first time we met. I’m sure that has a lot to do with it. You didn’t even wait until we were comfortable with each other to call me out on my shit. It takes a confident woman to go there.”

I chuckle, thinking back to my first conversation with Pam about the elusive Mr. Crabby Pants. “It was only because of the Girl Scout cookies.”

“You blame me for that? How can they run out of Thin Mints? That defies all logic.”

“It does seem strange to run out of the most popular flavor.”

Like we have all the time in the world, he stares at my lips. But he doesn’t lean in and close the gap. “No, seriously, I was having a really bad day. I wasn’t the easiest guy to get along with before Carla died. Now...there are days when I deserved to be called every name in the book. Like last week, when my laptop was acting up…I called customer service, and they put me on hold for thirty-eight minutes with that annoying elevator music and–”

“Thirty-eight minutes? Were you using a timer?”

He laughs and takes another sip of his tea. “I can be anal sometimes, if you haven’t figured that out already. Anyway, by the time the tech gets on the phone, I’m practically foaming at the mouth. When I tell the guy about my problem, he’s fucking clueless. He puts me on hold for thirteen more minutes while he consults a manual, an abacus, a sundial, and the ghost of Albert Einstein. He comes back to the phone, and he still can’t help me. I let it rip with my favorite four-letter word.”

“No! I could never imagine you doing something like that,” I add, not holding back on the sarcasm.

He smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. He’s searching for something, and I’m not sure what it is. If I did, I’d provide it. Anything to chase away the pain of a haunted past. “I know I can be a handful. Carla was always a good balance for me. She kept me from going off the rails. Now, left to my own devices…”

“Yes, I have first-hand experience with that Landon Cole. But I have to say, I like this one much better.”

Bit by bit his expression brightens. His full lips purse into a man-pout, then his troubled eyes blaze a fire I’ve seen before. After all this, he still wants me. “I don’t. Being vulnerable is so fucking hard. It’s easier to just be an asshole by default.”

“No, I can tell that’s not the real you.”

“Most of the time I have no clue about the real me. Everything I thought I knew about myself, my whole life, was rearranged in an instant. What’s left...I don’t know what to make of it.”

“Have you ever thought about talking to someone?”

“A head shrink?”

I have to offer the suggestion. It’s the only weapon I have to fight against the force of his pain. “Yeah.”

“That’s not really my thing. But after Carla died, I did see a therapist. I went a couple of times. I don’t think it made a difference. To be honest, I feel a lot better just talking with you.”

My brows knit together, and I want to accept the compliment. Instead, I reach out and lace my fingers with his, feeling for his pulse. “That’s sweet, but I’m not a professional.”

“But you are a trainer. Maybe you could train me how to not be an asshole. I know I’m not nearly as lovable as a dog, but I’m not a complete lost cause, am I?”

I give a little squeeze with my fingers. “Nobody is a lost cause.”

“You know what’s so crazy?”

“What?”

“I really miss those little terrors.”

I chuckle but roll my eyes at the same time. “Why do you insist on calling them that?”

“I’m just kidding. They’re actually great dogs. Especially since you started training them.”

“They were great dogs all along.”

He looks over at a pile of squeaky toys in the corner. “I know that now. The house just feels really empty without them. And when I went up to the shelter, Guy gave me the runaround. Is that normal? Do people typically get their dogs seized for a light spanking?”

My shoulders rise and fall as I try not to focus on the fact that he did something I don’t approve of and never will. But regardless, Guy had no right to take the Chihuahuas away from Landon. I’m not sure what game the older man is playing at. “Not in my experience. But you know I don’t believe in hitting.”

“Yeah. I get that now. What I wouldn’t give to go back in time to that moment when Chili was running around the arena with that lady’s tampon.” His face gives way to a smile. “Thinking back, it was pretty fucking hilarious.”

I giggle, picturing the string dangling from the dog’s mouth. “Yeah. But Chili was trying to give Burrito a run for his money, right?”

“Tell me about it. That tiny condom and the used Depends! I guess you know now that the condom wasn’t mine.” He looks into my eyes and waggles his eyebrows. “Right?”

I blush, thinking about how good Landon felt deep inside of me, hitting every spot. “No, it was way too small for you. But the verdict is still out on the Depends.”

When he doesn’t respond with words, just a sexy grin, my worry flies away. “No, but seriously, I’m gonna help you get your dogs back.”

His lips twist together, his pulse rate increasing under my fingers as I clutch his hand like a lifeline. “That would mean so much to me. It’s just not the same without them here.”

“I’ve known Guy for a long time. I’m sure I can talk sensibly to him. This has all been a misunderstanding.”

“Thank God.”

I grab my cell phone out of my purse, anxious to latch on to a distraction away from the feelings this man creates in me. They rip me raw, so much that I want to flee from them before I fall in even deeper over my head. “Let me call him.”

“I really appreciate this.” His voice carries an unexpected softness. The anger, the stubborn streak hiding the deepest of agony is what I thought I’d encounter. But this gentle soul? This part of Landon bombs my guard right down from around my carefully erected walls.

I call the animal shelter. The voicemail answers. I press the button to hang up. “Shit.”

“What?”

“They’re closed. They open tomorrow at nine.” Landon leans toward me, so close I can feel the moisture of his breath. I rush to assure him. “Don’t worry, Chili, Burrito, Taco, and Fajita will all be home soon. I can tell how much you’ve come to care about them.”

A smile tugs the corners of his full lips upward. “Really?”

“Yeah, Mr. ‘I’m Not A Dog Person.’”

“I thought I was Mr. Crabby Pants?”

“You’ll always be Mr. Crabby Pants to me.”

He chuckles, standing up and yanking me up with him as he unfolds to his full height. “I hope not. I’d rather be another kind of mister...”

“Like what?”

“Mr. Ice Cream.”

We look into each other’s eyes. My heart races with the memory of his touch. “You like ice cream that much? Funny you never mentioned it.”

He shrugs, pressing those talented lips together into a mischievous smirk, and I hold my breath, waiting. “No, I just want you to lick me all over like a scoop of mint chocolate chip and then nibble me like the cone.”

I laugh and refrain from telling him I’m all about indulging his fantasy. “There you go with the mint again. Didn’t that get you into trouble last time? I think you need to migrate toward some different, safer flavors.”

“Speaking of food, are you hungry at all?”

“Yeah, a little. Are you cooking?”

His expression lightens with that soft smile again. I could get used to this new version of Landon. Since he released his pent-up pain, it’s like he’s morphed into a different man. My shoulders sag as they release some of the anxiety they’ve been holding on to for days. We’re going to get another chance. “Me? I dabble a little bit, but I’m sure I’d scare you away with my kitchen concoctions.”

“What do you cook?” I ask.

“Not much. Mostly breakfast food when I’m not lazy. Sometimes, I’ll make pasta. It’s hard to mess up pasta. But many times, my dinners are in a frozen box.”

I stretch my back out like a cat. Every muscle that had been twisted and tense, lengthens. “That’s unfortunate.”

“Yeah, it never looks like it does in the commercials, and the taste… yikes! But a man needs sustenance, right.”

“A woman does too. So, what’s for dinner? Ramen?”

“No, I wouldn’t subject you to that cheap, processed crap. It might stunt your growth.”

I pull myself up to my full height even though he towers over me. “If you haven’t noticed already, I’m a woman.”

He wraps his arms around me, his hands only centimeters from the swells of my breasts. Touch me, Landon. “You deserve better. How about Chinese?”

He kisses the tender side of my neck, then moves down to my collarbone as a shiver travels up my spine. “That sounds good.” I don’t mean food.

“What do you like?”

Your huge cock splitting me wide open.

“Chicken fried rice and egg rolls.”

“I’m more of a beef lo mein kind of guy.” He grabs his cell phone off the counter and calls to order the food. A few minutes later, he hangs up. “They’ll be here in about thirty minutes.”

“Thanks, Landon.”

“I should be thanking you. I really appreciate everything, Brooke.” Landon walks over to me and kisses my lips. He runs his fingers through my hair. I look up at him. I can see the desire in his eyes without a hint of the pain that used to shadow it.

My cell phone rings. “Let me see who it is. Sometimes I get client emergencies.”

Landon nods. “You want something else to drink besides tea? Wine? Gin?”

“Maybe later.” I grab my cell and see Pam’s name on the screen. “I need to take this.”

He nods. “Sure.”

“Hey, Pam.”

“I’m sorry to bother you…” her voice is an urgent rush, “but I really need someone to watch Max. Quinn and I were gonna take him with us, but there’s no way he could make the drive to Spring Valley. He’s got a touch of diarrhea. Can you imagine if he lets his bowels loose all over Quinn’s Land Rover?”

“I’m so sorry to hear that.” There goes my night of hot make-up sex with Landon. “You know I’ll take good care of Max.”

“Thanks, Brooke. Quinn and I want to get on the road within the hour. His aunt is having a big family dinner.”

“No problem, I’ll be there soon.” I stuff the phone back into my pocket.

“Is everything okay?” Landon asks.

“Yes and no. My best friend, Pam, the woman who owns the shop with me, her Beagle is sick, and she needs a dog sitter.”

He looks at me, his head bent to the side. “That’s too bad.”

“I know. I was really looking forward to spending some time with you. How about you meet me at Guy’s shelter first thing tomorrow.”

I can see the disappointment in his eyes. “Okay. What about your dinner?”

“I’ll be fine. I’ll just raid Pam’s fridge like I always do.” I stand up and wrap my arms around Landon, kissing his lips and marking him as mine. “I’ll see you tomorrow, right?”

He smiles a little. “I’ll be there with bells on.”