Chris
Sitting in my car, my head drops as Trixie hangs up on me. Something has to give here. I hate being apart from her, I hate that I caused us so many problems. And I hate it even more that I’m sitting out in Lacey’s apartment complex parking lot. I don’t want to be here, but we have to work something out because I’m not abandoning my child, no matter how much I hate her mother.
Slowly getting out and shutting my door, I look around. Where did she get the money for a nice place like this? Far as I know, she doesn’t have a job right now. When she left town after our night together, she quit, and Joel said no matter how much she begged, he would never rehire her.
So how does she have money?
I give my head a quick shake, step into the foyer and buzz her apartment. I don’t have to wait long because seconds later, she buzzes back to come up and the locked door allows me in. Minutes later, I’m on her floor and I don’t even have to knock on her front door, it’s wide open. Stepping in, I look around the place. Seriously, where the hell did she get this kind of money?
“Hey, Lita is playing in the living room,” Lacey says, sticking her head out from the kitchen and pointing in the direction of the living room. I nod my head at her and head there.
Lita must hear me as I walk into the space and she looks up at me instantly. “Dada!” she screeches. I smile and go to her, lifting her up, kissing her softly on the head. God, I wish she was mine and Trixie’s. I talk to her quietly as I walk around the living room, looking at all the pictures. I stop on the section of baby photos and see one of Lita right after her birth. Pain envelopes me. Shit, she looks exactly like Lola did when she was born.
I look back to Lita and take in her features. Is this what Lola would have looked like had she lived? I don’t know if I can ever talk to Trixie about this. The second she finds out Lita’s name, the second she sees her baby pictures, it will kill her. It’s already killing me.
“Chris? Are you staying for supper?” Lacey asks, coming into the living room.
I shake my head. “No, I only came by to see Lita, and to talk to you about custody.”
Her face goes hard. “Put her back in the living room, I’ll set up the gate and we can chat in the kitchen.”
I set Lita down and go to the sliding doors in the living room, checking to make sure they’re locked. You can never be too careful, especially with kids. Satisfied she can’t hurt herself, I step over the gate and find Lacey in the kitchen.
“Before we start, how exactly can you afford all of this?” I demand.
She shrugs. “Side jobs. Had money saved up from when I was a club girl at the old Satan’s Law MC.” Satan’s Law MC was the old name of the Angels Warriors. Once Angel, Zippo, and Reaper took over, they made sure to change every aspect of the club, down to its name. “For a few years after that, I was a stripper, and they pay big bucks. Then I dated that doctor that gave me an allowance for a while. After that all fell apart, I worked at the dealership, as you know.”
“You mean to tell me you never spent any money?” I stare at her in disbelief.
She shakes her head. “Never had a reason to. The men I dated paid for everything I ever wanted or needed, so my bank account just kept climbing.”
“What are you doing for work now?”
“The only job I could get in this town—cashier at the 7-Eleven a few streets over. Nowhere else would hire me.” It’s not surprising. The Angels have a lot of power in this town, and if they don’t like someone, no one else does. “Pay isn’t that great, but it’s enough to cover the bills.”
I want to ask her why she didn’t just find a cheaper place to live, but honestly, not my business. Lita is my only concern. “Who watches Lita when you’re working?”
“Nice older woman a few floors up. She only wants to be paid twenty a week, as long as I supply all Lita’s needs.”
That’s a good deal. Moving on. “I want to be able to see Lita. And until I can figure out how to tell Trix, without her hating me forever, I need this to be kept a secret. I can’t have her finding out before I can talk to her.”
Lacey stares at me, tilting her head to the side, but doesn’t say anything.
I rub at my forehead. “Ever since I found out, I’ve been hurting my marriage, trying to talk to her, and I can’t. I know when she finds out she’s gonna kill me. I might never win her back, and I can’t let that happen.”
“You really should have told her when it happened, you dragging it out is only gonna make it worse.”
I snort. “No, what’s gonna make it worse is the fact that you named her after the child Trixie and I lost. That is what’s gonna make it worse.”
She looks guilty for once, but quickly covers it up. “I’ll keep it a secret, but we can’t be cooped up in here forever.”
“Look, people know you’re back in town, but if they see you with that kid, they’ll talk, and you and I both know the second someone see’s Lita, they’ll know without a doubt she’s mine.”
She looks down at her floor, wincing. “It’s a little late for that, Chris, a few people have already seen her.”
“Shit, who?”
“Vinny,” she says quietly.
Oh, fuck, that’s the worst person to know about this. Would he tell Trixie? “How long ago?”
“About two weeks, I guess? I was at the store getting a few things, and he was there with Lilly. He saw me, glared, saw Lita and his face went grim. I don’t think Lilly knows because he kept blocking her view of me and then he rushed her out of the place.”
Okay, maybe that’s good then. He hasn’t told Trixie yet, but that means I’m running out of time to fix this mess.
“I have to go, but I’ll call you soon … to have Lita for a bit.” I rush out of her apartment and to my car. Punch the steering wheel.
What the hell am I gonna do? Vinny won’t keep quiet for long, and I don’t trust Lacey as far as I can throw her.
I make it back to my apartment quickly, but before I make it to the front of the building, I’m grabbed from behind and spun around.
“Hey, Zippo,” I greet him.
“You fucking dick rag!” Vinny roars in my face. He shoves me back, and I stumble. His arm goes back and he punches me in face. “That was for Trixie, be fuckin’ lucky the others don’t know yet, or you might wish for death.”
He walks away and I stare after him, holding my nose as blood rushes out of it. I deserved that.
I deserve that and so much more.