Chapter 14
Staring up at the white ceiling, my room was cast in darkness, save for the moonlight streaming in through the window. I couldn’t sleep at all. After Sanja’s little accusation, I became angry. How dare she say my parents are witches! That was absurd. Wouldn’t I know, after all these years, if my parents were witches? I’d been racking my brain for the past hour trying to think of any evidence I’d ever seen in my life that could be witch-related. I never saw any type of witch paraphernalia in our home. No crystals, tarot cards, nothing. I also never got that weird spark-feeling-thing when I touched them. Didn’t Sanja tell me that was a witch’s indication of a supernatural? We would have both felt it. When I said this to her, to try to prove that I was right, she just simply said she couldn’t explain why it wasn’t there for me, but she had definitely felt it earlier this evening when touching them.
She also confessed that my parents had come by her bookstore earlier, before the game. She had been in the back, stocking shelves, when she had seen them come in and look around, and then chat with the owner. They didn’t see her, or notice her, but she noticed them. It hadn’t meant anything to her at the time.
I couldn’t dwell on this any longer. I rolled over and stared out the window, a three-quarter moon taunting me with its promise to be full soon. As I stared in loathing at the cursed moon, my eyes fluttered shut, and I was able to get some sleep, but it was anything but peaceful. I tossed and turned, hoping I would be functional enough to handle class the next day.
* * *
The school day dragged on, and when it was over, I immediately went to see Ryder on the football field, where he and the rest of the team were getting ready for practice. I caught him stretching, and when he saw me, he smiled.
“Hi, baby. What are you doing out here?”
“I need to talk to you. Do you have five minutes?” I asked, shifting my heavy messenger bag to my other shoulder.
He looked around and lifted his chin to his coach, who frowned at him when he saw me, and ushered me over near the bleachers. “What’s up?”
I looked around, lowered my voice, and asked, “Do you think my parents are witches?”
His eyes got big, and then he looked amused. “What? No. Where is this coming from?”
“Sanja said they are. She even saw them in her bookstore yesterday. Why would they go in a place like that?”
Ryder raked a hand through his hair. “Just because they were in a witchy bookstore doesn’t make them witches.”
I finally lifted the messenger bag off my shoulder and set it on the ground. “She insists they are, and I can’t believe I didn’t know. I don’t know how she knows, but maybe they have witch telepathy or something kinda like we do.”
“This is really weird. I don’t understand why they would hide something like that from you. I mean, why not just tell you?”
“Because we’re not witches, we’re wolves. Sanja says my parents for sure know we’re wolves, too. I’m just so confused.”
He lifted a padded shoulder and let it drop. “So am I.”
My brow furrowed. He was no help.
“Robinson! Field, now!” the coach yelled, and then he blew his whistle.
He leaned down and kissed me on the nose. “Why not just ask them? Love you. See you later!”
As he ran off, he put his helmet on, and then a ball was tossed at him. I picked up my bag and walked slowly away.
Ask them? Just like that? ‘Hey, Mom, Dad, are you witches?’ Um, that won’t go over well. What if they’re not? Then they’ll think I’ve really lost it.
* * *
I had let the information about my parents stew for a couple of weeks. I wasn’t ready to confront them, and I wasn’t sure I ever would be. The only reason I even wanted to was so that I could come clean about being a wolf. Tell them why we disappear on the weekends. Not that they knew much about what I did here in Boulder, but I know they had to have been wondering when the boys and I would be gone all night.
I had apologized the following day to Sanja for getting upset with her, and she graciously accepted my apology, still insisting they were indeed witches, and that I should talk to them when I was ready to.
So much for witches being bitches. I really liked her, and my mom for that matter, of course—if she was one. Poor witches getting a bad rap.
Regardless, I would talk to them when I was ready. Tonight was the full moon, and Ryder and I were on our way up to Wolfe Point to do our thing. I promised to make him leave the weed at home this time. That THC hangover sucked and I was not going to be tempted to do that shit again.
Once we reached the location, Ryder opened the truck door for me and then pushed me up against the truck, boxing me inside his arms. “I love you,” he said to me, staring at me with his seafoam-colored eyes. They momentarily flashed yellow like they always did this time of the month.
“I love you, too,” I said, my heart fluttering in my chest.
He leaned down and pressed his mouth to mine, and I kissed him back, wrapping my arms around his neck.
“Break it up, you two. You’re so disgusting,” Austyn said, laughing.
We slowly broke the kiss and looked over to see him standing there naked smoking a joint.
“Is this a regular thing now?” I asked, indicating the cigarette.
“Yep,” he replied, blowing smoke out of his mouth and smiling like an idiot.
I rolled my eyes. Ryder just laughed.
He closed and locked the truck and went to the trailer to get undressed. It was nice to have a clean place to put my clothes, to know exactly where they were when it was time to get dressed in the morning.
I was feeling restless now, and I looked up to see the clouds playing in front of the very full, fat moon. Stripping my clothes off, I stayed in the trailer until I could no longer stand it. Once I felt the fever-pitch begin to heat my body, I ran outside, dropped on all fours, and breathed through the bone-cracking pain until I was the wolf once more.
As one, the dozen or so of us ran into the woods like we always did to hunt and play.
Maybe one day I’d understand the reason for this curse. What purpose do we serve, turning into wolves like this?
“Nobody will ever figure it out, sister,” Aden said.
Dammit, will I ever learn to keep my thoughts to myself?
I stopped all internal thoughts after that, and just followed Ryder and my brothers farther into the forest. We caught a small fawn who was off by itself, and easily overtook it, and then tore into its throat, killing it instantly. We then feasted on raw deer until we were stuffed.
“I’m still hungry,” Austyn groaned.
Okay, so I guessed I was the only one who was stuffed. I definitely felt the need to run some more, as this nervous energy never left me while I was in this form.
“Let’s go find the others,” Aden said, leaving the devoured, bloody carcass behind us and heading back the way we’d come. We could still hear the others in our minds. We just weren’t sure what part of the forest they were in.
We had been walking in silence for a few minutes, when we all simultaneously froze as a disgusting scent hit our noses.
“Vampire,” Ryder hissed.
“Where is it?” I asked, feeling panicked. I didn’t want to kill another one, but I would if I had to.
“I’m up here, you stupid dogs,” came an accented voice from above us. Sounded Russian—eastern European maybe?
We craned our massive heads up and looked to see a vampire similar to the one we’d killed a few months ago sitting on a branch.
“Which one of you animals killed my brother?” he asked, sounding angry.
“Get the fuck out of that tree, you filthy bloodsucker, and we’ll tell you!” Aden yelled, but of course it just came out as howling barks.
The vampire laughed, his teeth gleaming under the moonlight. They were the same color as his platinum hair. His skin was flawless and pale like marble, same as the other one. “What was that, dog? I cannot understand you. Why don’t you turn back to a human so you can tell me, and then I can kill you.”
“Who are you talking to?” I heard Benson ask from somewhere in the forest.
“Vampire,” Aden replied. “Get over here. Now—all of you.”
I heard a myriad of voices assault my brain, all sounding angry, excited. I could hear them running.
The vampire began to climb down the tree by hopping from branch to branch. “My brother’s ashes had a particular wolf stench on it.” He stayed on the lowest branch possible, just out of our reach, as we were now barking and clamoring at the base of the tree, wishing we could climb it.
I heard the others show up behind me, and they all began to bark and growl. At the same time, I could hear their cursing and yelling inside my head.
“Oh, look, more mutts to join the party.” He chuckled. “I really only want one of you.”
He looked at us all and inhaled deeply, and then he locked eyes with me. “Are you the one who killed Sirus? Because you don’t look so tough. I bet I could take you on right now.”
“This idiot has a death wish,” Austyn said.
“No shit,” Benson said from behind me.
I barely heard them, though, as the vampire had locked eyes with me. There was something hypnotic about his stare, and I wondered if they could hypnotize and control people like in the movies and TV shows.
“Get out of that tree, you leech!” Aden howled at him, but he just chuckled again.
But then, in a mere split second, his laugh stopped and turned to an evil glare. I could swear I saw his face change from something near human, to something not even close. What it twisted into was something I couldn’t even put into words. It was like evil incarnate had manifested itself onto this creature’s face, and it was the most frightening thing I had ever seen in my life.
I screamed inside my head, and all my brothers and sisters heard it. However, it came out as a pained howl, and it was too late. With lightning speed, the vampire flew—yes, he flew—out of the tree and headed straight for me.
Out of pure instinct, I released my claws, raising one paw up, ready to defend myself, but the pain of his attack never came. Instead, I saw my two brothers, and my boyfriend, jump in his path.
The vampire, now on top of my brothers on the ground, were struggling. Aden and Ryder had managed to get out from under him, but Austyn was still pinned. I lunged toward the filthy bloodsucker, ready to tear out his throat when I suddenly smelled blood. I looked down in horror to see the vampire’s mouth ripping into Austyn’s throat. Fur and blood were everywhere.
“Help me!” Austyn whimpered inside my head. “Please.”
The vampire lifted his head and laughed, blood dribbling down his chin. “Wolf blood is so disgusting, but this is so worth it!” After spitting it out, he then reached down with lightning speed and ripped Austyn’s massive wolf head from his shoulders and tossed it away.
Then, without another word, he shot into the sky and fucking flew away. Like a bird, just took off.
Why hadn’t the other vampire—his ‘brother’—done that? Rookie vamp?
As my mind began to process what had just happened, as I finally came back to reality, I let out a blood-curdling scream—inside my mind. The only thing that came out of my animal body, though, was a pained howl that I was sure reached all the way to the moon. I knew this because I felt the grief and pain all the way down to my thick wolf bones.
I watched in horror and disbelief as Austyn’s body reverted back to human, lying dead, mutilated, and bloody, minus his head, on a bed of orange leaves.
“No!” Aden screamed, lying on top at our brother’s corpse. “No, no, no!”
I sobbed and sobbed, and then sobbed some more. I hurt so badly, and wished I could revert back to a human so I could cry human tears. I could only lay my head on Aden’s head, which lay on top of Austyn’s bloody chest. We both whimpered and howled. I wished for death.
* * *
My head was in a cloud. A high, floating, wispy cloud. One I had no intention of coming out of. I saw the streams of tears my mother shed. I saw Aden’s red-rimmed eyes as he pinned me with his pained stare. I saw the black circles under my father’s eyes as he looked as though he had no more grief to expel.
I was numb as the funeral was conducted. I barely heard what I was sure were lovely words from the pastor of the local nondenominational church where the funeral was held.
There were no more tears in my head to shed. I felt spent, exhausted, and done. Austyn St. John was my brother. We had grown up together. He had pulled my ponytails while I had played hopscotch on chalk-drawn sidewalks growing up. He and I had the same warped sense of humor, laughing at all things inappropriate. He wasn’t serious like Aden was; Austyn was the silly one, like me. Sure, we had fought, but don’t all siblings?
Shaking with anguish and still traumatized by seeing my brother decapitated by a filthy vampire, I tried to sit as still as I could in my seat at his funeral. Mom had asked me to say a few words at his memorial service. I had told her no, that I couldn’t, that I was too grief-filled to do such a thing. And then I realized that, even though my parents loved him—and us—I didn’t think anyone loved or knew Austyn like Aden or I did. But I couldn’t speak at his memorial service; that would have been too hard. That was when I realized I owed it to my brother to do him justice, to avenge him. This was the reason I sat here numb. I had expelled my grief, let go of it in screams and howls the minute I’d turned human. I hadn’t cared that everyone had fallen asleep, naked and filthy under the full moon. I had turned back to human that morning and had screamed obscenities at God and whoever else would listen.
Aden and Ryder had tried to comfort me, but I had been completely and utterly inconsolable. I had to be thrown into Ryder’s car, driven back to my house, and put into bed by him that night. I barely remembered it. Then, I was told, Ryder had gone to my parents’ house to give them the news.
When I had woken the next morning, Sanja had knocked on my door and asked if she could come in. I had let her, but I had barely been able to comprehend her condolences. I remember her hugging me and telling me if I needed anything, she would be here for me.
Aden had, apparently, told her what had happened that night. The rest was a fucking blur. I literally had no memory of the days after his brutal murder to the day of his funeral. That day—the day we laid him to rest—would forever be burned into my memory.
It would also be the reason I had become what I had become. The words sweet and innocent were no longer in my vocabulary.