Chapter 3
A strange numbness took over me as I walked down the halls of my high school. Everyone else carried on like it was just another day, but suddenly, my world had been rocked and nothing looked the same to me at all.
I felt like I’d aged ten years.
Between the horrific—and if I was honest—traumatizing first-time wolf shift last night, and the info dump about our parents that my brother had heaped on me, I felt worn down.
As I was at my locker, exchanging out my books, I felt someone hip-check me and slowly turned my head to see my much-too-bubbly best friend, Gemma, standing there with a smile on her pretty face, her cheerleader’s uniform pristine and perfect as usual.
“Why aren’t you suited up?” she asked, indicating my shorts, tee, and sneakers.
“Not cheering tonight,” I said, slamming my locker.
Her smile fell as she walked with me to our math class. “Why not?”
“Not feeling very cheery,” I replied dryly.
Gemma stopped walking. “Since when?”
What was I supposed to tell her? That I had just learned I was a werewolf, and my first date with Ryder ended up being a disaster in which I had had morphed into a dog, and my biological mother had been killed by my asshole Alpha father and I was a bit emo about it today?
Yeah, no.
“PMS,” I said on a whim, grabbing my lower belly as if crampy.
She blinked her big, brown eyes at me a few times, as if trying to catch up with the conversation, and then said, “Oh, yeah, girl. I can totally relate.”
Glad to have dodged that one, we walked into math class as she asked about my date with Ryder, and we took our seats at our usual desks. I slapped my math book on the desktop and looked over to Ryder’s desk. He was turned around talking to Benson. He must have felt my gaze because he swiveled around and locked eyes with me. When our eyes met, he smiled, and my bad day got a little better. I smiled back.
“Hot,” Gemma whispered from behind me.
I craned my head over my shoulder and saw she was smiling at me, a knowing look sparkling in her eyes.
“Yes, he is,” I murmured, forcing myself to tear my gaze away from him and try to get through my school day.
I was glad he’d smiled at me, but part of me wondered what he really thought about me. He’d already seen me at my worst. Clothes stripped off, bones breaking, screaming in agony. But he’d also kissed me crazy in the front seat of his car, and that had made my toes curl and my body to heat up and break out in goosebumps. Being that he was a wolf, too, I could only hope he didn’t think anything I’d done had been weird, because honestly, I still thought it was weird as hell.
As I tapped my pencil on my desk and tuned out Gemma’s ramblings about her prom dress shopping angst and her new crush on Benson, I wondered how Aden had kept all this from me. Then a thought occurred to me: if I had had to go through this first shift totally unaware and unprepared, that meant he’d had to, too. The thought made my heart drop into my stomach. That must have been horrific for him. It had been horrible for me, too, of course, but for him, he must have had nowhere to turn, to ask for help after the shift had happened. I would have to ask him about that.
I bet he had told Austyn, though. No way that bonehead brother of mine would have been prepared for it. Or hell, I bet he liked it.
Thinking about tonight gave me anxiety. Aden and Ryder had said I was going to shift again. Last night had been so painful—excruciating—and I didn’t know if I could endure that again. But Ryder and Aden had been doing it every month for a couple of years, and they were surviving it, right?
I blew out a breath through my lips and sat back in my chair, still reeling that werewolves were real. What else was real, I wondered. Witches? Fairies? Oh, my God… vampires?
“Open your books to page eighty-three, class,” I heard Mr. Trussel say.
My daydreams about beautiful creatures would have to wait until later.
* * *
Yeah, déjà vu was pretty much how I would describe this situation, except I knew Ryder and I wouldn’t be doing anything more than kissing, as I could already feel my body twitching and heating up. In between our kisses, when we came up for air, I could see the glint of yellow begin to overtake his otherwise aqua eyes, like a tidal wave rushing horizontally across his irises. I watched in fascination as this happened, then his pupil elongated vertically to become a slit in his eye, like a cat’s.
I saw Ryder’s gaze reflect my own as we both watched the transformation begin in our eyes. Leaning in, I kissed him harder, my hand snaking around the back of his head to push his face in closer to mine. He greedily kissed me back, running his warm hands down my backside, which was now scorching and on fire, it seemed.
“When…” I panted, trying to get the words out, “when does it happen? Like…” I continued to try to catch my breath as my body inflamed and I began to feel out of control…”what time, exactly?”
Ryder pulled back and smiled at me. “When the moon is at its highest. Tonight is 10:29 p.m.”
I didn’t wear a watch so I turned around to glance at his dashboard clock. 10:21 p.m.
Oh no.
“Just a few more kisses, and then we’ll have to get out, beautiful,” Ryder said as if trying to devour me before the bad came.
I nodded, kissing him back with everything I had. I hadn’t meant to, but I lost track of time, and before I knew it, I had to push the car door open and fall out into the night. With my skin on fire and my body aching all over, I crawled out of the car on all fours and let the bone-breaking, screaming pain begin.
* * *
The beeping of my phone woke me, and I blinked open groggy eyes. The first thing I felt was the cold. The second thing I felt was the cold on private parts that should not be feeling cold.
My eyes slammed open, seeing nothing but forest and mountain ranges. A glance around told me it was still dark, but a pink hue beginning to light up the eastern horizon promised dawn would be coming in an hour or so. Then I looked down on myself to see blood, mud, and filth.
Shit.
I struggled to remember what had happened after the pain had hit. It was disturbing me that I had lost hours of my life, with no memory of how I’d gotten so dirty and bloody. Whose blood was this on me? Some other wolf, or had I killed a person? And how long are we wolves? I mean, I usually required about eight or nine hours of sleep a night. How many of those hours did I spend as a wolf? I had felt exhausted all day yesterday, knowing I definitely had not gotten enough sleep. Was this going to be how it was during a full moon? I was glad today was Saturday. I was going to have to sleep most of the day to catch up. Looked like I was going to have a lot of adjustments to do.
Beep, chime, beep…
My phone. I saw it lying next to my clothes and I blindly fumbled for it, grasping it and bringing it to my face.
I had two missed calls and one text from Gemma: You missed practice. Seriously? We play Westlake next week. Step it up, girl!
I threw the phone down on my clothes, and it wasn’t until then I truly realized that I was naked.
Nude. In the buff. Naked. Bare. No clothes.
Glancing around wildly, I was glad—or maybe kind of disturbed—to see Ryder, Aden, and Austyn lying naked on the ground, sound asleep, curled up in a big huddle altogether. Austyn had his arm draped over Aden’s neck, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to laugh or shudder.
Sneaking over with the intention to wake Aden to take me home, I reached his sleeping form and crouched down, my arm covering my breasts. But before I could reach him, I felt something grab me.
Squeaking in fright, I looked down to see a hand attached to my ankle. Following the hand, it led to a muscular, dirty arm, then to a face of a boy I didn’t recognize.
“Where you goin’, sexy?” he asked.
Horrified, I shook my foot and whisper-yelled, “Let go of me!”
He threw me a sleazy smile and shook his head. “Come keep me warm, blondie.”
I got angrier. I stood up to get my balance and his smile grew wider—and even creepier, if that was possible—as I realized, again, that I was nude.
And he wasn’t letting go. “Nice kitty, meow,” he said, looking at my crotch.
I was horrified at his behavior, and I was sure my face showed it. For some reason, though, I wasn’t as embarrassed about my nakedness as I thought maybe I should have been. Probably because everyone around me was naked, too. Plus, it was still pretty dark out.
I crouched down once more, and with my arms still covering my breasts, I gritted out, “Let go of me!”
He shook his head no, and licked his lips. “Don’t you want to play like we did last night?”
I ignored his comment and reached around on the ground until I found a long stick. I stabbed it into his hand.
He bellowed in pain and screamed loudly, “You bitch!”
Glad he’d finally let go, I ran to my clothes and quickly slid on my pants and shoved my T-shirt over my head. Then I slipped into my shoes. I stuffed my undergarments into my pockets, along with my phone, and ran over to Aden, who was now awake and rubbing his eyes. Probably because of the yelling. The creep I’d stabbed was holding his hand and watching me. He looked like he wanted to attack me, his eyes switching between yellow and brown, but he just gave me a murderous look without moving.
I found it odd, and as I was about to ask him what his problem was, Aden spoke.
“What is going on? It’s not even dawn yet, Ay.”
I kept my eyes focused on his, not wanting to see any more of my brother than I already had. “Take me home… please, Aden? I wanna go home.”
“Yes, take the bitch home,” said the creep, loud enough for everyone to hear.
“Shut up, Sam! What’s wrong with your hand?” Aden asked.
“I stabbed him,” I offered before Sam could say anything.
Aden was shrugging on his flannel shirt and I was glad he had already put pants on, when he raised an eyebrow at me. “What?”
“Just take me home, please?” I pled.
“What’s going on?” Ryder asked, now sitting up.
I again, tried not to even look at him, but he said, “Ayla, what’s wrong?”
“Aden is taking me home. Call me later,” I said, not even caring about him at that moment.
“You sure?” Ryder asked me as he eyed me while slipping on a shirt.
I nodded and turned to walk toward the area where all the cars were parked.
“Get up, you ass,” Aden said, poking at Austyn with his foot.
“What?” he replied, groggy and not moving.
“Fine, find your own ride home,” Aden replied.
“Mm-hm,” Austyn replied, closing his eyes again.
Aden shrugged and began to stalk toward the car.
I asked, “You’re just going to leave Austyn?”
He nodded, mist floating from his mouth in the cold morning air. “Yep, he’ll get a ride. He is like, hungover after every shift. It takes him a while to wake up.”
“Why?” I asked.
He lifted a shoulder as he fished his keys from his pocket and disarmed his Ford pickup. He started it up as I climbed into the passenger seat. “Not sure, we all react differently. He’s not a morning person, either.”
“I know the feeling,” I murmured as he put the truck in gear and began to navigate down the dirt road that would lead us off this mountain. I saw Ryder watching us leave.
“Are you okay?” Aden asked.
I wasn’t sure how to answer that, so I asked, “Where are we?” I couldn’t see the night before when Ryder had driven us up. I hadn’t been paying attention anyway.
“Seven thousand feet up,” he replied. “We call it Wolfe Point, even though that’s not technically the name of it. It’s just a clearing we discovered a couple years back, and decided it was a nice, safe place to shift without disturbing any humans.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Humans. That was an odd thing to say.”
We passed multiple pine trees, and Aden had to drive super slow to make sure not to fall over the edge of the mountain. I was glad I hadn’t seen these hairpin turns as we’d been driving up the night before.
“Well, we’re not human, sister. I explained this yesterday.”
“I know,” I said, chewing my bottom lip. “I just need time to adjust, okay?”
He nodded, but did not take his eyes off the road. “You’ll need to sleep today. I can tell you’re exhausted.”
“Yes, I am.” I paused, and then said, “Aden, how come I can’t remember being a wolf? Shouldn’t I remember something?”
He heaved a sigh as though he was a worn out forty-year-old. “I didn’t remember either for the first few months, and others I’ve spoken to said the same. You will, in time, remember your shifts. But don’t expect complete clarity. The shifts come in flashes, at least for me, anyway, but I am mostly aware when we’re hunting.”
“So—”
“Yes, you are with me at all times. I wouldn’t let you go off on your own, even though you tried a few times,” he said, smiling sideways at me.
“Why am I bloody, Aden?”
He hesitated a beat before responding, “We killed a deer together.”
I gasped. “Why?”
He chuckled. “Because we were hungry. It’s what we do.”
I stared at him in horror. “No, please tell me you’re joking.”
He shook his head, his shaggy blond hair falling in his face. He brushed it aside and said, “Okay then. We killed a whole family. Mom, Dad, baby. It was awesome.”
“No, Aden, that’s not funny,” I whimpered.
“We killed a deer, you ding-dong. Now stop. There are lots of them in those woods. There always will be.”
“But that’s just so… gross. What if I eat a huge meal before the shift, then I won’t be hungry, right? Then we won’t have to kill Bambi?”
He burst out laughing, his hand slapping the steering wheel. “No, it doesn’t work that way. We hunt, it’s what we do. We can’t control it. Plus, it’s fun. The chase, the adrenaline, the blood. You enjoyed it, too.”
I didn’t want to think about that anymore as I stared down at the blood caked underneath my fingernails. So instead, I asked, “How come you didn’t ask why I stabbed that Sam guy?”
He chuckled. “Because Sam gets stabbed a lot by girls. Stabbed, kicked in the balls, punched, slapped… you get the idea.”
I made a gagging noise. “Good to know, I’ll steer clear.”
“Good luck with that. But don’t worry, he already knows you’re the Alpha’s sister, that’s why he didn’t retaliate when you stabbed him.”
My eyes widened. “Alpha? You? That means you’re in charge?”
“Shit,” he said, slamming on his brakesas a family of deer crossed in front of our path. He stopped just in time, but the deer ran off.
“Nice rack,” he said, pointing to a large buck leading the family.
“Funny,” I said dryly. “How many times have you used that?”
“Not nearly enough,” he volleyed with a grin.
He hit the gas again, and I was relieved as I saw the end of our dirt road and a stop sign that led to a paved highway. Aden turned onto it, and I breathed out happily that we were off of that dangerous road.
He was quiet for a while, and said, “Yes, Ayla, I’m the Alpha. When I found out our biological father was one, I told our little rag-tag group of shifters about it. They all unanimously voted me Alpha and Ryder is my Beta.”
This confused me. “Why not Austyn?”
He snorted and retrieved his sunglasses from his visor, sliding them on his face as the sun began to appear over the eastern horizon. “Have you met our brother?”
Point taken.
“How many in our… pack?” I asked, loving this quiet morning with my brother where I could just be myself and ask questions.
He shrugged. “About thirty, I think. There are only six girls, though. Well, seven now, thanks to you.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that, so I asked, “If you are Alpha, what does that make me?”
“Protected, princess,” he said, grinning at me as he continued down the lonesome Colorado highway, now lit up in yellow and orange from the morning sun.
“Wow.”
I saw him grip the steering wheel, sliding his fist up and down around it before he asked, “How serious are you and Ryder?”
“You know I’ve been crushing on him all school year.”
He nodded. “Yes, but are you two a thing now? Like, officially an item?”
I chewed my lip again and looked out my window as we flew southbound down the highway. I gazed at the mountain range out of my window and said, “I don’t know, but I think so.”
“You give it up to him yet?” he asked.
I gasped and whipped my head around. “No. Not that it’s any of your business.”
He grinned. “Okay, well, as long as you two are in love and all that, I won’t kick his ass for dating my sister.”
“I never said we were in love,” I replied, rolling my eyes. But just the mention of it did make my stomach do a little happy flip.