TEN
When Layla awoke to Benzio stirring beside her, she donned a strained smile and cuddled him into tickling kisses. He was in good spirits considering the heavy talk they’d had the night before, and Quin further lightened the mood by letting the toddler pick his own breakfast.
Layla sat up to nurse, her heart sighing as she pulled her babies close, but dread returned when Quin told her about his breakfast plans with Aradia and Banning.
“We can’t put it off,” he added, helping Benzio dress. “We’re out of time.”
Layla kept her gaze on the triplets as she nodded her agreement. If she looked at him, she’d cry.
Once Benzio was fed, Quin sent him and Arabella outside to play, and Layla reluctantly allowed her grandparents to take the triplets. As soon as her arms were empty, she wrapped herself in a hug and dejectedly walked to the kitchen, bracing for Aradia’s grief.
Quin entered after her, letting her know the plan as he summoned ingredients to the counter. “They’ll be down in a few minutes. Want some coffee?”
She shook her head no while staring through picture windows at the wintry forest.
The room steeped in silence as Quin started preparing the food, but then he carried plates to the table and cut through the tension. “Are you still upset about the way I reacted when you summoned visions?”
Her brow furrowed as her brain registered his concern. “No.”
“Are you upset about the way I treated my mom?”
“Did you apologize to her?”
“Yes.”
“Then it’s water under the bridge.”
He halted beside her, and she could feel his gaze drilling into the top of her head. “I ask because you’re not looking at me, touching me, or speaking to me.”
She bowed her head and blinked back tears. “I’m not upset with you. I’m just… I’m trying to get through this. Just let me get through it.”
He crouched and laid a hand on her thigh. “I want to help you through it.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. “You are, but this… this makes me cry.”
“Why?”
“Because with one touch, one word, or one look, you show me everything I love, everything I’ll be risking when I leave. I can’t spend what little time I have left crying over what I stand to lose. I need to see my children with clear eyes and give them a strong and positive memory of me, one that isn’t soaked in tears.”
He stayed silent for several seconds, probably trying to figure out how to bust down her walls so he could pull her into his arms. Then he sighed and squeezed her thigh. “I’ll be here when you change your mind.”
He straightened and walked away, returning his attention to breakfast, and she worked on filling her flattened lungs while wiping moisture from her eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“I know.” He floated a glass of milk and a folded handkerchief to the table in front of her. “Aradia and Bann are on their way down.”
She took a drink and grabbed the cloth, trying to compose herself before having to swallow Aradia’s disappointment. “Are you mad at me?”
Quin returned to the table with a carafe of coffee and a platter of pancakes. “No, love. I miss you.”
She missed him, too, but when she was forced to leave, he’d go with her, just the two of them, and she’d have the rest of her life, however short it may be, to drown him in a flood of her love.
Aradia and Banning walked in as Quin delivered the last dish to the table, and Layla drew a deep breath while rising to her feet.
Quin’s heart contracted when her sorrowful aura stretched, merging with Aradia’s melancholy colors. Then they embraced, flooding the room with a burst of emotion that brought tears to Quin’s eyes.
Aradia sobbed on Layla’s shoulder, and Banning turned his back on them, his neck flexing as he rubbed his face.
Quin fought a tight throat while wrapping tense fingers around the back of a chair, but he didn’t look away. Instead, he forced himself to watch, pissed he couldn’t fix their pain, disheartened by how much they’d endured, and jealous of the hug they shared.
Layla barely moved, as sturdy as a tree as she ran a hand down Aradia’s back and waited for her crying binge to settle. Once it had, Layla gently wiped away her friend’s tears and softly kissed her forehead.
Quin cleared his throat and straightened. Then he rounded the table and offered Aradia another hug. “Your brother’s a hero. If we ever see him again, I’ll make sure he knows it.”
Aradia gave a tiny nod. Then Layla steered her to a chair while insisting Banning sit.
After they’d regained their composure and filled their plates, Aradia pointed her fork at Benzio’s empty seat. “Where are the kids?”
“Outside,” Layla answered, shifting bites of pancake around without eating them.
Quin summoned a sliced and peeled apple and placed it next to her plate. “You’re still nursing. You need to eat.”
She set down her fork and picked up the fruit, taking a bite while facing Banning’s and Aradia’s confused expressions.
“What do you mean by still?” Banning asked. “What’s going on?”
Quin stabbed a bite as he explained. “We’re leaving for Maganthia this weekend. The Crusaders fear the Dark Guild is corrupting Maganthian politics, and they want Layla to fix it. We can’t wait until March like we planned. The Dark Guild isn’t resting, so the longer we sit around here, the further behind we fall.”
Banning was scowling, and Aradia’s mouth had fallen open. “But… but…”
“The decision has been made,” Quin added, “and it was strengthened by recent events. If we don’t go take care of this, the trouble will keep coming here.”
Aradia shook her head, as if she refused to believe him, but then Layla made an offer that drilled in the truth. “You can keep your room.”
Aradia dropped her fork to her plate. “Layla!”
Layla slowly raised her head, meeting Aradia’s flabbergasted stare.
“That room is the least of my concerns,” Aradia insisted.
Layla swallowed before quietly replying. “I know.”
Aradia leaned forward, vehemently pressing her point. “You’re the closest thing I have to a sister, and I’m supposed to just sit in my room and lose you and Alec in the same week?”
Layla’s cheeks paled as her lips dipped into a frown, but Aradia wasn’t done. “And to make matters worse, the two of you will be out there fighting each other.”
Banning laid a hand on Aradia’s back as Quin cut in. “She’s already considered everything you’re saying. Don’t you think she’d stay if that were an option she could live with?”
Aradia kept her gaze on Layla, her eyes filling with tears as her hands trembled. Then she straightened and scooted back her chair. “Yes. We all have to make decisions we can live with. Thank you for breakfast, Quin, but I need to digest this bullshit before I eat.”
She left the kitchen, and Banning glanced between Layla and Quin before scrambling after the woman who’d stolen his heart.
Layla stared at the door as it swung behind them, her face so pale Quin feared she might vomit, but her back stayed rigid and her tears were contained to her eyelids. When Quin reached for her shoulder, she moved as fast as a viper, blindly grabbing his hand before he could touch her. Then she lowered his knuckles to the table and linked her fingers with his, clutching them while forcing another bite into her unsettled stomach.
~***~
Aradia didn’t emerge from her room for the rest of the day, so there wasn’t a chance to continue the discussion or soothe the sting. Layla did her best to pretend all was normal as she divided her attention between her kids and her grandparents, and Quin worked on organizing their departure between cuddling the triplets and playing with Benzio.
As evening approached, Serafin once again mentioned performing a health exam on Layla, so Quin talked her into getting checked over. Though she agreed, she toted the triplets with them to Serafin’s home office, and she stayed distracted the entire time, as if she didn’t give a damn about her health. But nothing was more important to Quin, so he listened carefully as Serafin told them what to expect and how to handle it. He assured them her body was ready for strenuous exercise. Then he provided enough vitamins, minerals, and herbs to last them several months.
Daleen had dinner on the table when they emerged from the office, and she’d invited Caitrin, Morrigan and Quin’s parents, all of them desperate for more time with their offspring. Layla remained distant throughout their meal, focusing the bulk of her attention on Benzio, but she responded when spoken to, and she managed to flash a few smiles.
While Serafin and Caitrin cleared the table, Cordelia gave Quin hell for not tending to his hair, using words like shaggy while playing with the waves falling over his ears. He laughed at her teasing, well aware he’d been neglecting his appearance. Then he made her day by offering to let her give him a trim.
“I can’t remember the last time you came to me for a haircut,” she celebrated, rushing to set up a temporary salon in Daleen’s kitchen. “Should we give Benzio one, as well?”
The triplets were awake and ready to nurse, so Quin figured Layla wouldn’t mind if they stole the toddler’s time. “What do you think, Benz? Want to get a haircut with me?”
Benzio agreed. Then he and Quin sat side by side while Morrigan and Cordelia used magic to cut their hair. They didn’t take much off, just enough to make them look tidy and fresh, and while Morrigan offered to do the same for Layla, she refused, unwilling to devote energy to her appearance.
Once their mess was cleaned up, everyone moved to the living room, giving Layla the freedom to love on her kids while her grandparents loved on her, and they didn’t call it a night until Benzio’s eyelids got droopy.
Layla carried him home, and when Quin followed her into the bedroom, he found her tucking the toddler into their bed. Quin bit his tongue as he watched, taking note of the guilt stooping her shoulders and tugging on her aura. Then he followed her lead and laid the triplets next to Benzio.
Without saying a word, Layla headed for the bathroom, rubbing her face as she went, and Quin sat on the edge of the bed, reminding himself the space between them was temporary.
Drawing a labored breath, he summoned a pair of pajama pants, but before he could change, Kegan mind searched him from the front porch. ‘Are you busy?’
Quin glanced at the bathroom door as he answered. ‘No.’
‘Can we talk?’
‘Sure. Make yourself comfortable in the living room. I’ll be there in a few minutes.’
Severing the mind search, Quin made sure the kids were a safe distance from the edge of the mattress. Then he got to his heavy feet and waited for Layla to exit the bathroom.
She wore one of his t-shirts when she emerged, and he took a selfish moment to scan her legs while moving closer. He feared she’d reject his approach, but she met him halfway and leaned in, resting her forehead on his chest. “Your hair looks nice.”
He tentatively wrapped her in a hug, worried she’d slip away if he squeezed. “Thank you.”
“I see you,” she added. “I know you’re hurting, and I’m sorry I’m not making it better.”
“That’s exactly what you’re doing.”
“And it’s taking everything I have not to bawl.”
Soothed by her acknowledgment, he gave her a light squeeze and kissed her head. Then he let go and stepped back. “Kegan needs to talk to me about something. He’s in the living room.”
“Is Bri here?”
“No.”
“Does he need to talk to me?”
“Not that I know of.”
“Then I’ll stay in here,” she decided, climbing into bed with her kids.
Quin summoned a glass of water and carried it to her nightstand. Then he snuck in one more kiss to her head before leaving the room.
Kegan had helped himself to a drink, but rather than sit, he stood near the fireplace, staring at the family portrait that hung over the mantle. When he heard Quin’s entrance, he glanced over his shoulder while motioning toward the canvas. “Did Layla paint that?”
“With Morrigan’s help, yeah.”
“It’s stunning.”
Quin halted next to him and raised his gaze to Layla’s smile. “It’s humbling.”
“I bet. You have a beautiful family.”
“Yes, I do.” Quin turned away from their portrait and moved the visit along. “Want to sit?”
“Sure.”
Kegan walked to the sofa, and Quin floated an armchair closer to the coffee table. Once they were both sitting, Kegan leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “Ever think about marrying her?”
Quin’s nostrils flared with his attempt to stifle a bitter smirk. “What do you think?”
“Then why haven’t you asked her?”
“Because she doesn’t want to marry me.”
“How do you know if you haven’t proposed?”
“She’s told me.”
Kegan’s eyebrows shot up. “Ouch.”
“I won’t pretend it doesn’t sting. Do me a favor and don’t mention it to Wey. He turns everything into a joke, and this isn’t a laughing matter.”
“No shit, man. I imagine that’s a rough blow to endure.”
Quin shrugged as he summoned a nightcap. “It’s not as rough as you probably think. Her reluctance to marry has nothing to do with her heart. That’s already mine.”
“Then what’s the hold up?”
“She was raised by a single woman who never dated, so I don’t think she ever dreamed about getting married. Plus…” Quin paused and glanced at the hallway. Then he bowed his head and admitted the truth they all tried to deny. “She doesn’t think she’ll live long enough to be my wife.”
Kegan’s mouth fell open, but he quickly closed it, trying to curb his shock. “So she’s… what? Leaving the spot open for someone else?”
“Sometimes it seems that way, like this heavenly angel dropped into my life just long enough to give me four incredible children and a fleeting taste of the greatest love this world has ever known. And the crazy part is I’d fall to my knees and thank her for it. Who else can say they spent a year under the spell of an angel? And for her to give me children… they’re proof she was here. Even if she can’t stay, for a time, she was mine.”
“I guess you don’t need a wedding to know that.”
“Need? No. But I’d love to call her my wife. Maybe I’ll get a chance if we live through this.”
“I hope you do, man. You deserve it.”
“We’ll see. So what do we need to talk about?”
Kegan shifted forward and got to the point. “Have you decided what day you’re leaving?”
“Probably Saturday. Putting it off won’t make our departure any easier.”
“Will you give us until Sunday?”
“Why?”
“Because I want to marry Bri.”
“By Sunday?”
“Yes.”
“How are you going to pull that off, Keg?”
“The same way you would if you were doing it for Layla. We’ve been planning for weeks, so it’s not like I’m starting from scratch, and I’ll have help putting it together. It may not be the exact wedding she had in mind, and the guest list will be smaller, but at least the people who are most important to us will be present.”
“And Bri’s okay with this?”
“I think it’s exactly what she needs. She’ll probably never be the woman she was a week ago, but if I can show her the beautiful side of life and prove she doesn’t have to be perfect to be mine, maybe she can accept what happened and find a way to shine even brighter.”
“And if she doesn’t?”
“As her husband, I’ll have every opportunity to try something new. I won’t give up on her, no matter who she becomes or where she goes. I need her to know that. With all the chaos around us, I want her to feel secure with me. Let us have this moment, Quin. Please. I know I’m a selfish bastard for asking, but that should tell you how badly I want it.”
Quin sighed. “When? Sunday?”
“Saturday, but I don’t want to rush through it or turn it into a farewell party, so I’m asking you to wait until Sunday afternoon to leave.”
“What else will be required of us?”
“Just show up, stand with us, and tell Bri she’s the most beautiful bride you’ve ever seen.”
“I’m sure she will be. I’ll meet with Drexel tomorrow and let him know we won’t be leaving until Sunday afternoon.”
Kegan’s shoulders straightened as his chest expanded. “Thank you. I can’t tell you how much this means to me. I’ve wanted to marry her for years, and just as my dreams were within reach, the Dark Guild tried their damnedest to destroy everything I love.”
“We won’t let them.”
“Fuck them.”
Quin lightly laughed. “What kind of guests are we talking about? Will there be outsiders?”
“Preferably. Bri envisioned a big wedding, so I’d like to invite the original guest list. The short notice will trim it down, but a lot of locals will show up. Having said that, if inviting outsiders is a deal breaker for you and Layla, we’ll stick with our families and the Owen/Sullivan coven.”
“Will you have the ceremony here?”
“Do you need it to take place here?”
“Not necessarily, and if you’re inviting outsiders, I’d prefer you host them away from our homes.”
“You’re okay with that?”
“Are you okay with Crusaders monitoring your wedding?”
“If that’s what it takes for you and Layla to be there, yes. They’re good at staying out of the way, and the security is a perk. No one in our family is safe anymore.”
“Then it’s settled,” Quin agreed. “Give Bri her wedding. I’ll work with the Crusaders to make it safe.”
“Thanks again, Quin. I could grant you a thousand favors, and we still wouldn’t be even.”
“You owe me nothing, Keg. Just do what you’ve been doing for years and take care of Bri.”