Chapter Fourteen – Knox

He’d overreacted. When he saw Hannah slipping off the side of the trail, he’d panicked. Knox could not face the thought of losing someone else he cared for.

“How are you feeling now?” Hannah asked him as they walked along the trail behind Dustin.

“A little stupid.” Knox rubbed his hand over his hair. “Not exactly the strong, tough soldier.”

“I think you did OK. A little dramatic.” Hannah leaned into him. “But I understand, and I like that you care.”

“I do care. A lot. So much.” He gave a short laugh.

“Dustin likes you.” Hannah changed the subject, wanting to move on from the whole incident. “You’re good for him.”

“And he’s good for me.” Knox liked the boy.

“Glad you can see it too.” Hannah reached for his hand. “He could do with a father figure.”

“I’m not sure how good I’d be at being a father figure.”

“Why not? Your colonel was a father figure to you. He set you on the right path.”

“The army?” Knox shook his head. “I’m not sure that would be the right path for Dustin.”

“It doesn’t have to be the army. It might surprise you to know you don’t have to be in the army to make a difference.” She grinned and flashed her dimples.

“I get what you’re saying.” Knox looked up at the blue sky, glad to be alive. A bittersweet smile spread across his face. His guilt was subsiding, joy in the little things life gave you for free was starting to seep back in, and he was OK with that. “Jamie mentioned there might be work for me with some guy called Will.”

“Will Frasier. Yes, he runs a project in Bear Creek, it’s expanding all the time. He’s always looking for new blood. I think you’d fit in there. I can give you a reference if you need one.”

“What kind of reference?”

“Good with his hands,” Hannah teased.

“Thanks.”

“OK, a good communicator, specifically with young teens who have experienced loss. Good at following orders. Loyal, courageous.” Hannah paused. “I think it would do you good.”

“Me too. Take my mind off myself.” Knox watched Dustin walking in front of them, his shoulders hunched. “I wish I could take Dustin’s mind off all this.”

“I think you can. But he needs to do this first. He needs closure.” Hannah walked in silence, watching Dustin. “Closure might be something you consider too.”

“What do you mean?” Knox was sure he wasn’t going to like it.

“Have you met the families of the men who died? Spoken to them?” Hannah asked gently.

“No. I told you I was a coward.”

“When you’re ready, you’ll know. And I’ll be there with you if you want me to.”

“I don’t deserve you, Hannah.” But he couldn’t live without her.

“Yes, you do.” She reached up and stroked his cheek, her thumb brushing his lips.

“This is it.” Dustin stopped. Approximately twenty feet in front of them, the path widened and forked to the left.

Knox and Hannah joined him, looking up at the mouth of the valley, where the rocks and dirt from the landslide had been piled high as they dug for Lex’s body.

“Is this close enough?” Hannah asked.

Dustin shook his head and reached into his pack. “I have something I want to lay there.” He reached into his pocket and drew out a shiny medal then turned to look at Hannah. “I’d like to go the rest of the way alone.”

“Sure, you go. We’ll wait here.” They both knew Dustin wouldn’t run, not this time.

Watching him go was heartbreaking. Each step cost Dustin so much, but he took those steps all the same. His young shoulders hunched further, and shook as he began to cry. Hannah leaned on Knox’s chest and cried her own tears as they watched Dustin. The boy kneeled down in the dirt and dug a hole before placing his token of love in it and covering it back up.

“He won a medal in track and field a week after his dad died. He never got to show him.” Hannah watched Dustin as he stared at the ground. “His dad helped him train.”

“Poor kid. To push himself through his sorrow to win.”

Hannah pulled away from Knox. “Now I get it. Dustin never said, but I remember there was trouble that day. Another kid having a go at him. Ross Vardy, the same kid who teased him about shifting.”

“So that’s why this kid keeps picking on Dustin.” It all made sense.

“I’ll speak to Principal Collier when we get back. We need to take care of it once and for all. Poor kid, runs his heart out to win a medal for his dead dad and then puts up with this crap.” Hannah’s temper flared.

“Hey, let it go. That can wait.” Knox understood her anger.

“Here he comes.” Hannah wiped her face and puffed out a couple of breaths. “Let’s get down off the mountain.”

“Agreed.” They’d done what they’d promised to do. It was time to get the boy home and back with his mom. Time for Knox and Hannah to move on, to make a life of their own. Have kids of their own, but he would always be there for Dustin as long as the boy needed him.

“Can we go?” Dustin didn’t wait for an answer; he walked on past, heading for the trail back down the mountain.

Knox and Hannah followed silently behind him. When they reached the trail, he took her hand and she let him. “It’s faster going down,” Hannah commented as she slipped a good couple of feet along the trail, raining small pebbles down before them.

“We should be back at the cabin before it gets dark. We could push on for the truck and get off the mountain tonight.” Knox’s need to keep them safe kicked in. They were exposed out here; they were safer back in Bear Creek.

“I think maybe Dustin needs some time before he goes back. Let him have a night to process everything that’s happened. We can eat and let him talk if he needs to.” Hannah gripped his hand tighter as they slid down the last section of the trail onto the grassy plateau. The sun was beginning to descend behind the mountain, and they hadn’t eaten anything other than granola and candy bars. Hannah was right, they all needed to eat and rest.

With the cabin and the thought of food so close, they picked up the pace, covering the last couple of miles quickly. The cabin was still empty when they reached it; no other hikers were around. Knox allowed himself to relax, they’d completed the task, Dustin had kept his word, and showed no sign of running. If anything, he was newly optimistic.

“Can you teach me all your survival skills?” Dustin asked as they sat down to eat. They had all helped prepare the rest of the food Hannah had brought with her. Dinner was tuna and pasta bake, along with the rest of the bread, and dessert would be a rather squashed, but just as tasty, cake from Dustin’s pack.

“I can if you are willing to work hard. It’s not the kind of thing you can learn in a day or two.” Knox glanced across at Dustin. “But I think you’re a quick study, so maybe a summer.”

“This summer?” Dustin looked at the flames licking the wood in the hearth. “My dad was going to teach me how to track, and how to tell normal animals from shifters.”

“I’m not your dad, but I can teach you that. Takes a lot of patience, the differences are subtle.” Knox liked that Dustin was talking about his dad. His own grief had caused him to shut the memories of his fallen friends away. When he thought about them, he saw them broken on the ground.

“Like what?” Hannah asked. “I’m intrigued. You guys have all these extra senses, but is it something someone like me could learn?”

“You mean a girl?” Knox earned himself a kick in the ankles. He chuckled. “I don’t know, because I don’t know what you can hear or smell.”

“I smell good.” Hannah made a joke and sniffed her armpits, before pulling a face.

“We taught one of my squad to know the difference. So I guess we could teach a civvie.” Knox forked food into his mouth.

“Tell me about him.” Hannah’s prompt was gentle, a nudge in the direction he’d been skirting around. Could he break through the perimeter and enter the territory his brain had classed as out of bounds?

“Ronno. He was a city boy who decided he needed adventure. He joined the squad late, but he made sure he fit right in. When he learned about shifters, he understood that to really fit in he had to think like one and act like one, even though he couldn’t shift. So we used to set him up. This or that. A bear that was your friend, or a bear who could take your head off. He got good at it fast.”

“I’m not sure Dustin needs to be put in danger.” Hannah finished her food and put the plate down beside her.

“Ronno nearly got his name changed to Runno,” Knox reminisced. “This one time he thought he got it wrong. He stood his ground, but the bear kept coming. So he ran.” Knox chuckled. “Smithy chased him for a mile before his bear collapsed on the ground. I’d never seen a bear roll around laughing before.”

“Sounds as if you have good friends.” Dustin’s voice was wistful.

“I did. I did.” Knox smiled sadly.

“You don’t have them anymore?” Dustin’s question hung in the air.

“Some.” Knox tilted his chin up; it was time to stop running, it was time to own the memory of their deaths. “Some died in an ambush a few months back.”

“I’m sorry.” Dustin placed his hand on Knox’s shoulder. “I didn’t know. Death sucks.”

“It sucks eggs,” Knox agreed. “But we have to live on, don’t we? To honor their memories. A young man named Dustin taught me that.”