I had been wishing my whole life for a day to come that wasn't exactly the same as the day before. But apparently, I should’ve been more careful what I wished for.

My head spun as I tried to process what I’d read, and, more importantly, what those words meant for me.

I would die without having seen the sea in all its majesty.

Without having known a man who looked like the ones in the book.

Without having found out the full extent of what the Devil's Doorbell was capable of.

The hell with that.

As a rule, I didn't even think swearwords because I wasn't supposed to know any. By careful listening to the kitchen staff and the maids, I had picked up some, which I knew were really bad because the one time I said one in front of Caretaker Dawn, she was cutting a switch before I'd even finished speaking.

Thinking of punishment reminded me again of how long I had been down here reading. I dumped the book back on the table and ran towards the exit. If I had ten days of life left then I wasn't going to spend them scrubbing floors.

Breakfast had already begun when I entered - fresh fruit, as usual. If I never saw another peeled grape in my life then it would still be too soon. I didn't try to sneak in because if you're spotted doing that then you're already guilty. I walked in normally and Caretaker Harvest beckoned me, glaring.

"You are late and I did not see you in temple. Where have you been, you wicked girl?"

"I've been sick," I said, weakly. "I think I ate a bad grape."

Caretaker Harvest shook her head sharply. "There's no such thing. They are all perfect - created for us by the gods."

"Well, something's upset my stomach," I insisted. "I threw up." Then I played my trump card, leaning in and whispering, "Both ends."

Caretaker Harvest recoiled with distaste.

"I thought it best to leave the temple," I explained. "I didn't want to…unholy it."

"You cannot unholy the temple."

"What came out of me was definitely unholy."

The Caretakers have a very uneasy relationship with bodily functions of every kind - they want to believe they're demonic but are also aware that they're infectious. This sort of talk was guaranteed to get me some alone time.

"Go to your room," commanded Caretaker Harvest, trying not to breathe in. "I'll send someone to take care of you."

I hurried out, shooting an urgent look at Sadie, who recognized it and began to eat faster. I had to talk to someone about what I had found out, if only to get it out of my head.

When I got back to the dorm the whole situation hit me. To this point, I hadn't really had a chance to think about it because I'd had to get to breakfast, then fool Caretaker Harvest, and so on. Now I had nothing to do but sit on my bed and wait for Sadie, my mind was suddenly at horrid liberty to turn over the full import of this new world in which I found myself living.

Perhaps it was rather smug of me but I had always thought of myself as the 'alpha dog' around here. Even when the Caretakers punished me, I still took pride in the fact that I had forced them into this - I had done the thing that they had told me not to and even if I had paid for it, I had still done it. I was the one calling the shots. It turned out that I had been a pawn all along. How they must have laughed behind my back at my petty little acts of rebellion. How it must have amused them to know that while I stole little victories by crafting weapons or practicing my fight moves, I was just a victim waiting for death.

I didn't like things this way around, and conflicting emotions burned back and forth through me; rage, fear and grief, fighting for supremacy. Rage won. How dare they do this? How dare they treat us like this? If they were sacrificing us to stop the volcano from erupting then I would understand - I would still be pissed but I would understand. But this? They were killing twenty-five innocent girls to make their soldiers stronger so they could go on killing other soldiers. What the hell kind of logic was that?

It occurred to me that if they didn't kill us they would have twenty-five more potential soldiers, which would surely be just as good as the volcano god's blessing - how good could that blessing be if we were still at war after all this time? But, of course, that would only count if we were men. I had made my own weapons and taught myself to use them. I could be as good a warrior as any man. I knew it in my heart and, right now, I was eager to prove it on the next person who walked through the door.

Sadie walked in and I sprang up as if I was going to attack her, making her jump.

"You're not ill."

One of the things I love about Sadie is that sweet innocence that means she is still surprised when it turns out I was lying about something. I took her hand and guided her to sit on the bed beside me.

"I have to tell you something important. Something that will change your life."

Sadie crossed her legs. "I told you; you can't touch it. It's bad enough you touch your own. You'll get in trouble again. if you keep doing it."

"Not that," I hissed. "This is much bigger than the Devil’s Doorbell, Sadie."

Sadie looked at me suspiciously. In recent months, nothing had been bigger to me than the Devil's Doorbell and she was clearly wondering what could possibly have supplanted it.

"Okay then. I'll listen."

I took a deep breath and prepared to give it to her straight. "We're all going to be killed."

She blinked. "We are?"

"Sacrificed," I went on, narrowing my eyes menacingly, to let her know just how serious this was.

Sadie nodded slowly. "Oh. Okay then."

I stared at her like she’d sprouted a second head. "That's your reaction. Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

She shrugged one lean shoulder and I let out a disgusted snort. Then, I gave her the whole story; the tunnel, the book, the pictures of men, the sea, the volcano, the pictures of men, the other nation, the war, the pictures of men, and the sacrifice. Sadie listened to it all with a mildly interested expression on her face. She waited until I was done and then spoke.

"Aleah, do you remember when you told me that eating lemons would make my breasts grow bigger?"

I sucked on the inside of my cheek before nodding. "Yeah." I probably shouldn't have grinned as I said it, but it was a good memory.

"It wasn't funny."

"No, of course not." It was really funny. "And I shouldn't have done it to you. You're a good friend and you don't deserve it." She didn't.

But it was still funny.

Every morning she'd weigh her boobs in her hands, trying to tell if they'd grown during the night. I still can't believe she kept up with it for two weeks.

"I haven't eaten lemon since."

"In my defense," I tried, "it gets incredibly dull around here and a girl's got to do something to beat the boredom."

"Like play tricks on her best friend?" It was kind of her not to say 'only'.

"Think how clean and fresh you smelled."

"It's not funny, Aleah," Sadie insisted. "And I'm not falling for it again."

"That was a long time ago."

Sadie nodded. "Yes, I suppose it was. Do you remember the time you told me you'd seen a unicorn in the jungle?"

That had not been so long ago. "I think I vaguely recall it."

"You told me it was scared of manmade items. Like clothes."

"I did do that, yes."

"I sat naked in that clearing for two hours, Aleah."

I laugh bubbled in my throat but I managed to swallow it back. "More like an hour and forty-five."

"Then it started to rain."

I held up a hand. "You can't blame me for that. I can hardly control the weather, Sadie."

"Maybe not, but I can blame you for my clothes being gone and nearly freezing to death in the rain."

"I brought them back to you as soon as the rain started," I pleaded. "And I wouldn't have let you get in trouble."

"You just let me get wet." Sadie shook her head. "I love you, Aleah."

"I know,” I murmured miserably. “Why is that again?"

Sadie shrugged. "You're your own person, which is something no one else here is. Truthfully, all the girls probably want to play pranks like that but they don't. Not because they're too nice, but out of fear. And they let their nastiness come out in other ways. You aren't nasty; you're just..." She strove for a word.

"Bad?" I suggested.

"I don't think you're bad."

"I don't understand why not."

"The point is," Sadie returned to her original train of thought, "I love you. But I have to stop believing what you tell me. Or sometime down the line, I'm going to stop loving you."

My stomach flopped like a dying carp and I dragged my gaze away from Sadie’s probing stare. I remembered the story of the Boy Who Cried Wolf, which the Caretakers had taught us when we were little. I'd always thought it was pretty dumb, but now I was finally understanding the point. Better late than never, I guess.

But this was not the time for my only friend to stop believing in me. I had to get her to trust me on this. Failure was not an option.

I took Sadie by the shoulders and looked into her soulful blue eyes. "Sadie, I'm telling the truth. We have to get the fu... We have to get out of here before it's too late. If we don't leave, then in ten days we're going to die."

I watched Sadie's eyes widen and wondered if I had actually gotten through to her. But when she spoke, she said, "No."

"Sadie..."

"I don't..." She was tussling with whether to believe me or not. "I don't know if I believe you or not, Aleah. I mean... I always believe you, but I'm trying really hard not to this time. But either way; we can't leave." Her eyes and mouth had widened to saucers now. "We don't know what's out there."

"The world," I said, plainly. "A world of people and places and animals we've read about and never seen. A world of beauty we can't imagine. We could see the ocean, Sadie. Water as far as the eye can see. Can you imagine that? There are all sorts of different people. There's ice that falls from the sky. Who knows, maybe there are actual unicorns out there somewhere." I took her hand and realized that I was starting to become emotional. "Please come with me. I need you."

Sadie looked into my eyes. "I can't."

I was about to go on, but just then Clementine walked in, looking suspiciously in our direction. Sadie pulled away from me and stood up.

"Thanks for asking," I could hear the sadness in her voice and saw a suggestion of tears forming in her eyes, "but no."

I had always been going to ask Sadie but, equally, I had been prepared for her to say no, because this was Sadie. I had been prepared to escape on my own. But theory and practice are very different things. Hearing Sadie actually say 'no' was like having my heart ripped out, and in that instant, I knew that there was no way I was going without her. But equally there was no way I was staying here to be sacrificed to a volcano.

Which meant I only had one choice.

I had to kidnap Sadie.