They made it all the way to the lift. Adelina held it together until they reached the fifth floor. When she walked out into the hall and the doors closed behind them the anxiety she’d worked so hard to overcome, to learn to master and control, came roaring back with a vengeance. It was so severe her breathing came in gasping pants and her heart fluttered like a hummingbird’s in her chest.

Adelina collapsed, holding her chest, desperately trying to find air to breathe.

“I’ve got you. I’ve got you,” Varan said gently. He picked her up and cradled her to his chest, moving them through the royal wing as quickly as possible before anyone could see her, before the recorders found them. “I’ve got you, it’s over,” he said again. “Place your hand on the door, Lina.”

It was all she could do to remain conscious. Her ears buzzed and the edges of her vision grew black with large white spots that blinded. Adelina didn’t have the strength to lift her hand as her body started to convulse. Shock, she realized. Shock was settling in after witnessing her first execution.

Varan placed her hand on the door and managed to get her in the room, and then lay her down on the couch. He rushed off to find…something.

The familiar place settled her just enough that she jumped to her feet and stumbled into the low table. Her nails, no they were more like claws now, shredded through her gown as she ripped it from her body.

Then suddenly Varan was there. “Hey, hey,” he said in a soothing tone, hands reaching out for her.

“I have to get it off,” she muttered over and over. The smell of blood was thick and cloying and it was all she could taste on her tongue and in her mouth. It filled her nostrils and it smelled almost rotten with the way it cooled and hardened.

The dress fell to the floor in ribbons and she tried to step over it, but there was blood on her knee. It had soaked through the gown and her foot slipped on the slick, wet material. She fell. The marble against her bones made Adelina feel like she was about to shatter.

“Hey.” Varan wrapped his arms around her. “Hey, look at me,” he demanded.

That sharp voice and the scent of his dominance reached her, the cleansing smell of winterflowers overpowering the rotten stench of cold blood. Adelina looked up into his eyes, the emerald green putting so many of the gems to shame. He looked right at her, fingers sharp on her chin as she shook uncontrollably.

“Good, now breathe with me, love,” he said, placing her golden palm on his chest. “One long breath in through your nose.”

Adelina did as he said. There was no room in her mind to argue, to even think of an alternative to the roaring thoughts and panic. She had to get out, out of the palace, out of Draga Terra…

“Focus darling,” Varan said. His voice was softer, gentler than she’d ever heard it before. “Now let that breath out through your mouth, and just breathe with me.”

Each breath was longer than the last, and then slowly, so slowly she felt she might be able to breathe on her own without a reminder as to how. When her anxiety was this bad she couldn’t remember how to function, how to breathe, how to walk…it paralyzed her in ways she hadn’t suffered from in so many cycles.

Her body shuddered with the sobs, and tears fell to the marble floor, mixing with the dark blood as the adrenaline still raged through her. Her sitting room started to come back into focus as a whole, rather than bits and pieces. Varan’s face and not just those depthless emerald eyes formed.

She was naked, blood streaked along her golden skin and Adelina vomited as the image of those heads rolling toward Raena’s throne flashed through her mind.

“All right,” Varan said, lifting her up with his hands under her arms. “Can you walk with me? We’re going to clean you up, remove any trace of the blood. The water will wash it away, Lina. Walk with me.”

It was too difficult to nod, but she moved her feet with his, focusing on the way he stepped until she was sitting in the massive tub with the water running.

Varan took out his cast as he poured her jasmine oil into the water. The smell filled the room with the steam and the blood swirled down the drain until there was no trace of the horror left. Then he stopped up the tub. Varan tapped out a message and then put it away, focusing on her. Those emerald eyes never left her face, they never once looked at her naked body.

On some level she felt embarrassed and stupid. She’d panicked in front of him. Losing control always made her feel ashamed, but at the moment she couldn’t spare a thought for anything that wasn’t keeping her alive.

A few seconds later his simulcast chimed and he responded. The door to her sitting room opened, she could hear someone moving in her rooms and Adelina stiffened in panic. Who was in her rooms? Who would Varan call?

“Tea, Prince Varan,” a female said, handing him a steaming cup.

Varan thanked the servant and then jerked his head in the direction of her sitting room. “Get rid of it, burn it, and sterilize everything.”

The vaguely familiar female servant curtseyed and then disappeared. Varan held the cup to her lips and the smell of her favorite dark tea, strong enough to wake the dead, steamed her face. Water lapped, covering her body to her collarbones as she reached for the cup.

“I can do it,” she murmured, taking a sip. “Thank you.”

Varan said nothing as he watched her. His face was white under his tan and his teeth were clenched. “Have you always had panic attacks?” he asked.

She nodded and downed the tea, wishing for something just a little bit stronger. “There’s alcohol in my cabinet,” she told him.

Varan didn’t move. “After you’re dressed we’ll have a glass.”

Adelina scrubbed her skin with an exfoliator, ignoring the red marks she created. She had to get clean, had to get that rotten blood off…

Varan’s hand stilled hers and gently removed the sponge. “If you keep scrubbing you’ll break the skin.”

Then he stood up from the edge of the bath and grabbed one of her robes hanging on the wall. He draped it across one arm and held out a hand to assist her out of the bath.

Adelina hesitated.

“I won’t look,” he said softly, averting his eyes.

She placed her hand in his and stepped out of the bath. The floor absorbed the water dripping off her body and she slipped her robe on, not quite able to look at Varan’s face once she was fully covered.

Without hesitation he directed her towards her massive closet and indicated she should sit down at the vanity. Varan rifled through her clothes and Adelina watched him. He was too familiar with her rooms, where things were, and there was that servant.

“What did you steal from me?” she demanded. The spark of anger cleared away more of the terror and panic.

Varan turned with a few items in his arms. “Nothing you missed, obviously.” That charming smile didn’t quite reach his eyes as he selected a comfortable pair of boots and then started rifling through her jewels.

Thankfully her hair was still intact and the nila would make quick work of the makeup streaking down her cheeks, the kohl running like her tears had.

“If it makes you feel any better, it was before I knew who you were,” Varan shrugged. Not even a tiny bit apologetic.

Adelina twirled her finger and Varan turned his back to her. It only took a few seconds to slip the black pants and boots on. “I want it back.” He’d selected an elegant black shirt to pair with the more serious pants and shoes. An interesting choice.

“Of course, darling. But first you have to tell me what I stole,” he teased, trying to create some tiny sense of normalcy.

His words almost made her smile. Adelina wiped her face clean with a cloth and redid her makeup. “You may turn around,” she said, staring at him through her mirror.

When Varan faced her their eyes met and there was genuine concern there. He hid it when he caught her watching and then strode forward, snatching the necklace he’d selected. The Prince of Thieves draped her diamonds around her throat with ease and familiarity, as if he was her lady-in-waiting. The mundane task didn’t seem to bother him at all.

“I could have managed,” she whispered, knowing without him she’d still be crumpled on the floor in her sitting room, no doubt scratching through layers and layers of skin until the pool of blood around her was her own. “I meant to say…I believe I can manage now.”

He only nodded. “Do you want me to kill her?”

Somehow the question didn’t surprise her. Varan didn’t ask lightly.

Adelina shook her head. “We don’t know that Raena will harm the people. Yes, she’s frightening and dramatic, but she didn’t hurt anyone who hadn’t deserved it. She served justice. She’s aiding our people in the outer rim; she’s listening to my advice and counsel. Asher will be able to temper her as well while I’m gone…” she trailed off. It was all true, but an unpredictable ruler was dangerous. It was all fine until Raena decided she didn’t need anyone’s advice or counsel any longer.

Then there was Giselle. The fight on the border had changed her and Adelina didn’t know how. Would she push Raena into the more violent choices?

“The offer doesn’t expire. All you have to do is say the word.”

Varan didn’t look at her as he finished with the necklace and then leaned against her vanity. His fingers trailed over the pieces in the top drawer, trinkets and gems she favored. They lay in the black velvet like treasured friends. “You’re truly as bad as the dragons.” His rueful smile was affectionate though, skillfully changing the subject.

Adelina would never forget the offer; never forget she had the power to do something about Raena if the need arose. The thought made her sick and she had to place her hands flat on her vanity to keep the bile down, pressing into the black-wood. Would executing Raena without a fair trial make Adelina any better than Raena? Goddess, she was her sister. How could she even have such thoughts?

“Family and the Crown are not always easy to balance,” Varan murmured. “I see that now. Everything that happened in there…the way you handled it…” He raked his fingers through his hair and sighed. “I used to think Princess Adelina was the most naïve, stupid female in the universe. I thought she was a pawn and useless. You’ve played the game so well for so many cycles you’ve fooled a master player. I’ve been kicking myself, wondering how I’ve missed it all this time; how I didn’t connect the dots, or see the games you were playing.”

Varan looked at her then, and she held still. Adelina was too afraid to interrupt his train of thought and this was…important.

“Even when I found out the Princess Adelina was my good friend and fellow thief Lina, I thought you were just playing a game that bored, rich nobles liked to play. But you always kept my secrets; you always paid your dues to the Thieves’ Court. When the attack on the Royal Palace happened, I watched you on the livestream, I watched you walk those streets and help those who needed help, those mothers you mentioned in the Ladrole. You actually cried on the livestream when those babes were found lifeless and you held females you didn’t even know as they grieved.”

Tears pricked Adelina’s eyes but she didn’t look away.

Varan was still as death as he stared at her, stared into her. “That’s how I knew it was you that night. You nearly ripped a man to shreds. I’d never seen that side of Lina before. You were always so careful. Then you spoke of the mothers and I knew. Nadyah’s presence helped confirm the guess, but there was no one else out there pulling children from the rubble aside from Asher. It had to be you.”

Adelina blinked and the tears fell. Varan wiped one away with such gentleness. He took one of her hands in his and it didn’t feel strained at all. It made her feel – grounded.

“Watching the livestream over the cycles was something I did to stay on top of things,” Varan said. “But when I found out who you were I watched them far more closely. Still, it wasn’t until you asked me for help that I started to see past the royal mask. Then the party…Goddess,” he muttered, rubbing his forehead. “Those bloody spiders…”

She picked up one of her favorite rubies, the color so deep and dark it was nearly black. It reminded her of blood.

“What happened in that meeting today, how you held it together, watching you slip on that cula’ting stupid smile I hated so much, and then the way you played with her Lina and still got what you wanted…I was terrified for you. I almost stood and pulled you from the ground when you knelt in front of her where those people had died, in that red pool.” He shuddered at the memory and slid off her vanity. “How you’ve done this for so many cycles, how’ve you managed to fool everyone…” Varan shook his head.

Adelina set the ruby on the vanity and tapped it. “This has a twin. I want it back.”

Varan’s bark of laughter surprised her. “Yes, it does. I’ll make sure to return it.”

“The same exact one.”

She didn’t know what to say in response to his declaration. Everything he said was true, but it meant something to him to see beyond the games.

Varan was putting her back together after she’d shattered. With Nadyah’s love, and Varan’s attention, loyalty, and dedication she was starting to feel whole again – no longer broken despite all Raena had threatened her with.

The Prince of Thieves melted her heart with the way he cared for her – making sure she was distracted when she needed to be, helping her achieve the impossible. It wasn’t fair to compare as both males were completely different and had different responsibilities and she loved them both in different ways.

Adelina paused as she realized…she loved Varan? She looked at him, watched him watching her and remembered the way he’d held her close, putting her hand on his chest. There had always been feelings between them, but it had been nothing to take that step and see what was really between them.

Varan pulled her from the chair and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her forehead. “I’ll return the same exact ruby, Lina.”

Adelina let out a shuddering breath and felt almost normal again. “Thank you, Varan. I’ve never had someone able to – help me, through an attack so quickly before.”

“My little sister used to get them,” he murmured against her hair. “I’ve had plenty of practice.”

“Why have I never met her before?”

His arms tightened around her. “She’s dead.”

The harsh words made her flinch. Adelina pulled back and looked up into his face, just a bit too roguish to be beautiful, but it made him handsome – adding to his attractiveness. She placed a hand on either side of his face and softly, so softly, she kissed him. It told him her feelings of gratitude, the depth and scope of them that words couldn’t properly communicate.

“You did well, despite the circumstances,” she told him, pulling away before she lost herself in him. “Now I need to see my father before we meet with Ian.”

Varan tensed, no doubt forgetting about the results that could change his future. “I’m not sure the king would welcome me.”

Adelina twisted her hands. “Alpha lied to me,” she stated.

The prince snarled. “I’m aware.”

“Nadyah is having a difficult time and you…” she hated saying it, hated how desperate it made her sound. “You’re the only ally I have right now. I need you by my side.”

His face softened and he chucked her under the chin as he’d done a million times before when they were no more than a friendly pair of thieves. “Then I’ll stay. We have much to do if we’re leaving in a matter of days.”

Adelina nodded. And the coronation was tomorrow.

Then Raena would be Queen.