XANDER

Vee stands at the kitchen sink and the glass she holds beneath the tap overflows as she stares out the darkened window. I switch off the tap and take her glass, and Vee blinks at me as she returns to the here and now.

"Are you okay?" I ask her.

She wipes the water that spilled on her hand onto her shirt. "I think so. Are you?"

"No." Because why lie to her?

"I thought about what we said. I don't understand what shifted inside me, but I do know he won't succeed now."

He. Chaos. Fucking Seth. I rub my temples, wishing I shared her confidence.

"I need to tell you something." Vee touches my hand and I drop my fingers in surprise. "I saw something else in that vision, Xander," she whispers. "I saw him. You all."

"Bad?"

Vee looks away and closes her eyes. I think she's retreated from me again, until she opens them and looks straight into mine. Ewan told me what happened in the room, how he saw nothing, but she reacted as if something attacked her, and I've waited for her to tell me.

There's a strange shift in how I feel about Vee. The connection feels stronger, as if the hold over me grew, and I sense myself within her more than I did before. I’m enmeshed tightly, and I don’t think I can unpick that now. Ever.

Vee relents and describes what happened. She refuses to tell me everything she saw, says she will once she’s processed and can talk about it. All Vee will say is she'll stop what she saw from happening.

Most importantly, and to my relief, she tells me she felt powerful against Chaos.

"Did we help you?"

I wait, eager to hear anything that could guide us towards any clue. Darkness flickers across her face. "You were there, but don’t ask me any more. I almost didn’t tell anybody at all, but we can’t hide things."

I want to say that she is hiding things, but I also understand how she sometimes doesn’t deal with trauma. How much really changed in Vee? Is she hiding the girl we saw in the snow, that night in Scotland, the one hellbent on hunting Chaos and demons down? Or is she still precariously balancing between human and whatever she is now?

"I'm worried about what Logan said—the energy he saw. Can you sense it?" she asks, as if reading my mind.

"I think you're charged with more energy somehow, through the four of us. Maybe our idea was right all along, and we activated something inside you."

Vee takes a ragged breath and I'm alarmed when her eyes well with tears. Shit, not this again. But I should be happy, because this emotional reaction means despite the visions, the teleporting and energy, she’s still the Vee we love. A slightly drunk version, but Vee.

"A lot scares me right now, but one thing frightens me the most." She whispers. "If whatever I am needed to absorb power from each of you, and some kind of destiny is fulfilled, will you stop feeling for me as intensely? Will you still want me here? All of you, I mean."

If her fears were true, I wouldn't stand here and look at Vee with my heart hurting for her. If our relationship was only created to keep us close enough that she could take our energy, now I'd return to seeing her as a weapon, and know who against. Vee's not only a part of me because of this weird situation, but because I care about her. So fucking much.

"I don't understand what you mean, Vee. We're a team. All of us."

"If I'm this energy Logan saw though, I'm not your Vee, am I? What am I to you all now..."

Oh shit. Actual tears. I run a hand across my head and respond the only way I know how. If I hug Vee, comfort her, I can't see the tears and maybe I'll stop them. I wrap Vee in my arms, holding her head against my chest, willing her to stay calm. She doesn't feel any different to the last time I did this, she's still my Vee. Our Vee.

My aching heart races in response to her body close to mine, and I'm shocked by how sudden and intense the need for her is. I've noticed the tension crackling between her and the guys since she changed, realised what this means, but this is fucking overwhelming. We’re not further apart after her absorbing our energy, we’re closer.

Vee pulls her face away and looks up at me. Her reddened eyes have darkened as her response matches mine, her mouth parted as she looks back.

Oh hell.

I take Vee's face in both hands and mash my lips onto hers. She parts them eagerly, allowing my tongue to explore her mouth. Vee holds my head in return and kisses me with an intensity that makes every kiss between us before seem as if we held back.

I feel Vee, in my heart, in every cell, as if I can't be whole without her touch and kiss and this takes over. Not taking my mouth off hers, I back Vee to the kitchen counter and move to slide my hands beneath her top. She does the same, fingernails dragging across my lower back. I'm hard, and so fucking quickly it’s insane. I can't get close enough, and she arches towards me as I press her into the bench with my hips.

Wrenching my mouth from hers, I look down, struggling to breathe. She looks back, pausing as I do. I trace my finger along her full lips. "Nothing’s changed and won't change. Can't you feel the effect you have on me?"

"Physical," she murmurs and moves her hand to my crotch between us, and sends more pleasure through as her fingers brush my erection beneath.

"You know I mean more than physical," I whisper hoarsely. She needs to hear this. Vee needs to know. "You mean the same to me as you did two days ago." I brush my lips against hers, controlling myself, holding them in place and hoping she feels what I do.

Vee slides her hand upwards and places her palm against my heart, which thumps harder than ever. "In here?"

What do I say? If I tell Vee what I'm thinking, will she assume I'm saying the words because she wants to hear them?

"You know you're in there. I never had a chance at keeping you out."

Vee’s answer is a hard kiss, one where our teeth collide and we’re lost in each other. I struggle to hold back, but Vee’s pulling me under. I slide my mouth away from hers again, struggling to hold on to my self-control. We're in the kitchen. Sure, the other guys went upstairs, but still. Bad idea.

"Don’t stop," she whispers.

"You're drunk."

"No. Xander, I need this. I need to feel connected. I have to know I am."

I grab Vee by the hips and lift her onto the counter. We exist in our own space, out of time. As we hold each other’s faces, the shared breath between us is hot and intense. The charge beneath our fingers where we touch cheeks, between our lips where they hover so close together, trips the switch on the energy between us and everything floods out.

This is the final surrender. A surrender to myself, not her. When I kiss her again, my soul splinters. The remaining parts I've held together are torn apart by the intense energy coming from Vee, and the relief I never lost her.

She pulls at my T-shirt and I help tug it over my head, her hands going straight to the button on my jeans. My body trembles with the desire to consume the girl who consumes me. I push her shirt upwards and kiss Vee's skin, exhaling out control as my stubbled cheek presses against her soft skin.

Vee feels the same, tastes the same, and her scent engulfs as before. No. She's not the same; Vee's so much more to me now.

Vee tugs at my hair so I have to meet her eyes. I'm looking into a mirror, but not because I'm looking at the War in Vee’s eyes. There is more spoken in this look we share than any kiss. This connection will never break.

"Aha!" A female voice comes from behind.

I drop Vee's top where I have it pushed up and close my eyes. "Hello, Syv."

"I'd say don't let me stop you, but you're kind of close to the sink and I want some water." She pokes her tongue out. "Feels like something crapped in my mouth."

This girl has no shame as she walks over, takes a glass from the drainer and proceeds to fill it. Vee stares at Syv, mouth parted, and I place my hands on the counter, either side of Vee.

"I find sex on kitchen counters uncomfortable. I mean, yeah, sometimes caught in the moment it happens, but ugh." She rubs her ass. "Y'know?"

If I can't believe the words coming out of Syv's mouth, I hate to think what Vee's thinking.

"Thanks for the advice," I half-growl.

"No problem." Syv sips her water. "Although, I'm glad you have your clothes on, or this could've been awkward."

I look at Vee, relieved to see her fighting a smile. Really? Because this is bloody awkward and a huge mood killer.

"Night, kids." Syv winks at Vee and half-stumbles from the kitchen with her glass.

I rest my forehead against Vee and she giggles as she curls her hand around my head, playing with the hair at my nape. "For fuck's sake," I mutter.

She presses her lips on mine before kissing across my cheek to place them against my ear. "At least it was Syv and we were mostly clothed, rather than one of the guys and we were naked."

"True." I huff and step back, helping Vee from the counter.

"Besides." Vee gestures at the surroundings. "There's a lot that could get broken in here."

I smile and stroke her hair. "You mean with the literally earth-shattering orgasms I give you."

The smile Vee gives me fills my body with a warmth to match the day I watched her play in the snow. "If my changing also transforms you into the Xander who can joke with me, I can deal with that."

I tip my mouth into a half smile. "Hey, I'm not joking."

She runs a finger from my chest to the waistband of my jeans. "I know you're not."

How drunk is Vee? I've seen her worse, once, but right now I can't figure out if this is a good idea. It’s taking all my self-control not to spin her around and fuck her against the kitchen counter.

Fuck, man. Calm down and think about where you are.

"We should go to bed," she whispers and tugs at my hand. "Be civilised for once."

Like a man held in a spell, I follow Vee upstairs, knowing full well if she walks into my bedroom, the self-control I’m hanging onto with my fingertips won’t follow us in.

I hope bloody Syv didn’t choose my bed.

My curtains are open, illuminating a Syv-free bed, and Vee stripping. The yellow moonlight highlights her curves as she pulls off her shirt and unclasps her bra, leaving me no choice but to put my hands and mouth on her.

Her long hair hides perfect pink nipples, waiting for me. I gently trace my finger around the soft flesh. "You are so fucking gorgeous."

Dipping my head, I take her nipple into my mouth, sucking hard. A low sound in Vee’s throat is accompanied by her arching herself closer. I tease her, running my tongue from her nipple, to the swell of her breast; around, then down, my lips across every inch of her exposed skin.

She drops backwards on the bed, holding my head against her breasts, and I continue my slow exploration of her body. She’s falling apart beneath my hands and mouth. I could easily fall too, cover Vee’s heated body with mine. Perspiration slicks my forehead as I pull away from my concentration on her gorgeous tits and drag my shirt over my head. I hold her to me, and her smooth skin meets mine, nipples against my chest. Another small sound of arousal, and she presses against me, more urgently.

I’m startled by a noise outside, somewhere close to the house. Banging. I attempt to turn off the vigilance that curses me every day, and half-listen for one of the other guys to walk downstairs and check what the sound is, but nobody does.

Shit.

Vee’s maddening touch and taste pull me away from my need to charge outside, but another noise stops me. A louder bang.

"It’s probably Syv leaving," she murmurs and runs her fingers against my jeans, where my cock strains against them. "Xander. Please."

"Hang on."

"Omigod, no!" she hisses at me.

I’m a madman. A complete fucking idiot, and I curse that my power is my strongest drive, even stronger than this moment with Vee. I grab my T-shirt.

"I’ll be a minute."

I kiss Vee briefly on the forehead and don’t miss her sour and shocked look as I leave her.

As I walk through the door, I almost slam into Joss, walking from his room and rubbing bleary eyes. "Did you hear that noise?"

"Yeah." He runs a look along my body. "Having an exciting time, Xander?"

"Shut up. Come on." I pull on my T-shirt.

Joss shakes his head. "Go back to your fun. I’ll take a look and call out if I sense or see anything. Could be Syv."

"That’s what Vee said."

Joss’s mouth curves into a smile. "Well, then."

Without another word, he jumps down the stairs two at a time. I pause, pulled in two directions. Trust Joss to sort this and go back to Vee, or help him.

No question.

Back in the room, Vee lies naked on the bed, head turned to one side as her tangled hair brushes her face. I move towards her, waiting for a word or movement, and as I get close I realise her heavy breathing isn’t linked to the thought of me anymore.

Should I be insulted that I’m out of the door less than a minute and the girl in my bed passes out? Unable to resist, I sit and draw a line across her soft skin with a finger, looking down at how beautiful, how human and how amazing she is.

Refusing to be a creeper staring at her naked and asleep, I kiss Vee’s cheek and pull a sheet over her body, then waver between staying and following Joss. Vee moves in her sleep, murmuring my name and asking where I am. She grips the sheet and her breathing speeds up. Mine does too, with panic she might be having another vision.

Screw it. Joss can deal. Vee needs me. I lie next to her and pull her into me. She lays her head on my chest and curls a slender arm across. I bury my nose into Vee’s hair and my chest aches, stomach twisted in knots. I’ve denied there could be anything more than a crazy, physical need for each other, but that denial won’t stand anymore.

I love Vee.

And from now on, I’m going to try bloody hard to show her.