I was awakened by a little girl jumping on my bed.

“Daddy, I’m hungry,” she pouted.

Rubbing my face with my hands, I tried to wake up after being so abruptly jerked from a very nice dream about Jenna. It hadn’t even been sexual. It had been sweet and fun and very strange. That was not normal.

“You want to go get some fresh donuts?” I asked her.

Her eyes lit up and she started to clap her hands. “Yes!”

I laughed at her enthusiastic response. Yesterday, while on my way to the drug testing place, I had passed a bakery with a sign advertising fresh donuts every hour from five in the morning until ten, seven days a week. I couldn’t pass up a fresh donut.

“Go get dressed then. I’ll put some clothes on and we’ll go.”

She raced out of my room and I could hear a flurry of activity coming from her room. Yawning, I shook my head still trying to wake up fully before heading for the bathroom. I’d shower later. She’d go nuts if she had to wait for me to get ready. With my teeth brushed, a clean shirt and a faded pair of jeans on, I figured I was in good enough shape to go get donuts.

It was early on a Sunday and I had a feeling I wouldn’t be the only one there looking a little rough around the edges.

“Let’s go,” I shouted, pulling on my baseball hat as we headed for the door.

As was my habit, I glanced over and saw Jenna’s car in the driveway. She’d been gone last night when I checked. Once again, I had felt that little spurt of jealousy at the idea of her out with another man, but I knew I had no business checking up on her or wondering what she was doing, or who.

I did a quick check of my tires and was happy to see they were all still inflated. Either my enemies didn’t know where I lived, or they were too chicken shit to show up at my house.

With hot, aromatic donuts in hand, we returned home. I immediately noticed Jenna standing in her front yard talking to an older woman.

She waved when I climbed out of the truck. “Colton, come on over and meet your other neighbor,” she said with a warm smile.

I cringed, not used to the whole friendly neighbor thing, but unloaded Abby and headed over to where the two women were standing in Jenna’s front yard. My eyes, shielded by my sunglasses, were focused on Jenna as I walked. She was wearing low-rise jeans and a tiny t-shirt that didn’t reach her waistband. The little strip of smooth white skin was playing peek-a-boo with me, making my body respond in ways it had no business reacting.

“Hi,” I said, extending my hand to the older woman, pulling off my sunglasses with the other. I guessed the neighbor had to be in her sixties. “I’m Colton, and this is my daughter Abby.”

“Hi. I’m Mary Bellows, and Abby, I have a granddaughter about your age. She comes over to visit me sometimes. Maybe you two can play together the next time she comes over.”

“That sounds like fun!” Jenna said enthusiastically.

“I’m sorry I haven’t gotten over here sooner. I’ve been busy, and it seems whenever I’m home, you’re not,” Mary was saying.

I nodded my head. “It’s fine. I’m glad we finally managed to meet. This is a nice neighborhood.”

Jenna and Mary exchanged a look before bursting into laughter. “For the longest time it’s only been me and Mary. The house over there has been foreclosed on and empty for at least a year. We are the neighborhood,” Jenna said with a smile.

“Well yeah, a nice neighborhood like I said, and beautiful,” I added, hoping I sounded charming. It wasn’t my style and it felt a little weird, but I could do it. I wanted this normal life that so many other people craved. That feeling of belonging to a community wasn’t something I thought I wanted, but for Abby’s sake, I wanted to try.

Abby was grinning and nodding her head. “We got donuts for breakfast.”

I felt heat rush to my face. Guess I wasn’t going to win any father of the year awards with that little announcement.

“You did?” Mary said, exaggerating her reaction. “I bet they tasted delicious.”

I was relieved by her reaction, since I’d been steeling myself for a scolding about the sugary treat first thing in the morning. Jenna and Mary didn’t seem the least bit bothered by our breakfast. I could get used to this laid-back way of life.

Abby nodded. “I only got one. Daddy said I had to wait until we got home to have more.”

Mary looked up at me and winked. “That’s probably a good idea. Donuts can make little girls very messy and you have on a very pretty dress. We wouldn’t want it to get all sticky and stained.”

Abby was practically glowing with the woman’s compliment about her dress. She had picked it out herself and was feeling quite proud of herself.

I looked at Jenna, caught her looking at me and felt a flash of heat slam into my body. “Good morning,” I mumbled.

“Good morning. So, Mary lives across the street.”

I looked at the house I had pegged to be a family home with the minivan parked outside.

“I have my grandkids quite often and I’m sure Abby would enjoy playing with them,” she was saying. “The next time they’re coming over, I’ll let you know.”

I nodded. “That would great. We haven’t met any kids her age yet.”

“Well, I better get back home. I have a pie in the oven and don’t want it to burn,” she said in a sweet voice before waving and heading across the street, leaving me alone with Jenna.

“I’ll let you two get to your donuts while they’re hot. I need to finish getting ready for work,” Jenna said and I could see the nervousness in her eyes.

I nodded. “Bye,” I said, as I grabbed Abby’s hand.

Jenna was putting me on edge and I didn’t like it at. It was one time, I reminded myself. One time only.

At home, I poured Abby and myself a glass of cold milk and enjoyed our fresh donuts before she curled up on the couch to watch her favorite cartoon. I got busy with the normal housework, finding myself to be a little bored. I couldn’t wait to start training at the gym, but first I needed to find daycare for Abby. I dreaded the idea of dropping her off with strangers, but it would be good for her to play with other kids.

It wasn’t long before the donut breakfast wore off, leaving me starving.

“Hey, are you hungry?” I asked Abby, who had moved to her room to play with her toys while I was vacuuming.

She shrugged a shoulder. “Do you want to go the restaurant where we ate before?” I asked, hoping she would say yes.

I wanted another chance to see Jenna. It was a tease and I should leave well enough alone, but I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted to see her. I wouldn’t touch her. When she was working, she was off limits. That was safe.

Once again, I loaded Abby up and headed for the diner, spotting Jenna’s car in the back parking lot. I knew the drill now and had figured out which section was hers.

“Hi, Jenna,” Abby said, as she walked into the diner like she owned the place.

Jenna turned around and smiled. “Well hi guys!”

I looked around and noticed the diner was busier than the last couple times I’d been in. I was looking for my little friends and didn’t see them. I was a little bummed and relieved at the same time.

“Can we just sit?” I asked, not sure if things were done differently when it was this busy.

She grabbed a menu and waved her hand. “How about right here?” she asked.

“Perfect. Thank you.”

“Are you guys out bumming around today?” she asked in a cheery voice.

I shrugged, “It seems to be what we do every day.”

“Have you been to the park yet?” she asked.

“We went last week.”

She shook her head. “Sundays are family fun days. They have a small carnival set up with a little petting zoo and other fun stuff for the kids. You should take her.”

Abby’s eyes lit up at the sound of zoo. “I want to go to the zoo!”

“We’ll check it out after lunch. Thank you for telling us about it,” I told her, wishing I could ask her to go with us.

“I’ll be back in a minute,” Jenna said, and rushed off to grab plates of food for another table.

When she came back, I quickly gave her our order, almost feeling guilty for making her that much busier. She certainly didn’t seem to mind and gave us extra attention. We were about halfway through our meals when she reappeared at our table with a kid-size milkshake complete with whip cream and a cherry on top.

“What’s this?” I asked, looking at the shake.

“This is for Abby. You are such a good girl,” Jenna said. “You are an example for so many of the other kids that come through here that don’t know how to behave.”

I smiled, feeling a sense of serious pride over the compliment. “Thank you.”

Jenna froze, the milkshake in her hand. “Oh my gosh, I’m sorry. I should have asked first. Is this okay?”

I chuckled. “I fed her donuts for breakfast. I think a milkshake with lunch is okay.”

“Whew, thank God.”

“Thank you for that. What do you say Abby?”

“Thank you, Jenna,” Abby said, grabbing the straw and sucking hard. “Yummy!” she squealed.

Jenna left the check and off she went again. I watched her move around the diner, laughing and smiling with her customers. I could see how she stayed so thin. She was constantly moving. She reminded me of a little hummingbird, flitting around, and spreading joy as she went, even if it was in the form of greasy diner food.

“Can we go to the zoo now?” Abby asked, still sucking on her milkshake.

“Finish your chicken and then we’ll go,” I ordered.

I wanted an excuse to sit in the diner a little while longer. I loved watching her. Each move reminded me of that one night together. I took a deep breath, pulling myself back to the here and now. I couldn’t let myself go down that road or I was going to be sporting a boner. Not cool.

“I think we’re ready,” I mumbled.

“But I didn’t finish my chicken,” Abby protested.

I nodded. “Finish up.”

I pulled out my wallet, left a twenty on the table and waited for Abby to take a few more bites.

“Let’s go.”

“Bye, Jenna,” Abby waved as we headed for the door.

“Have fun!” Jenna called out, waving back at Abby.

I wanted to ask her to come by after work, but could think of no good excuse to get her over to my house. The need to be near her was pissing me off and confusing me at the same time. I was not that kind of a man. I didn’t get moony and sappy. Jenna was making me feel very unlike myself and that was not a good thing. I needed my edge. I couldn’t afford to get all googly-eyed and miss something.

The park was packed and Abby nearly blew a fuse when she saw all the animals. I hung back and let her play with the other kids and even chatted with a few of the other parents as we watched our kids run and play. It felt weird to be normal.

I hoped it wasn’t short-lived. The more I was here, the more I saw myself settling in and making a life for myself and Abby in this small Nebraska town.