Chapter Twelve
Riley
I looked shyly at Silas. I had been excited to show him my illustrations and relieved when I could see how much he liked them. I didn’t how many people what I did. I knew it wasn’t good to be so reserved about my work, but I was still afraid of rejection. It was a huge relief to see how much he liked it. I hadn’t realized quite how much I wanted him to like it until I saw the smile on his face. I almost burst into tears I was so happy. Now he was looking at me in a way that made me feel nervous. I had just put the book of illustrations away, and I had turned to look at him. He was sitting on the bed, smiling at me.
“Oh yeah?” I said casually and went to sit on the bed with him. I felt almost naughty, like I had a boy in my room when I wasn’t supposed to. It took me a moment to realize that we were sitting in a house that I actually owned. The whole thing felt surreal. “So, what kind of girl do you go for then?”
Our eyes locked and I couldn’t seem to tear mine away. I had never seen more beautiful eyes before in my life. Dark green, dusted with specks of gold. I had a vision of him up on stage, lost in his music while he played the guitar. When he became famous, the girls were going to go crazy about him.
“I have a thing for brunettes,” he said. “And I’ve always liked long hair.”
I smiled. “Go on.”
“Big brown eyes make me weak at the knees. And I like it when I’m way taller than a girl.”
I stood up. “I’m very tall,” I said even though it wasn’t true.
He stood up and towered over me. He looked down and grinned. “You’re perfect. I also like girls who walk around barefoot all the time.”
I looked down at my feet and chuckled. “Well, how about that? Do you like a girl with a tattoo?” I asked.
“Tattoo? Tell me more about this tattoo.”
“Do you like a girl with a tattoo of a character she designed herself on her ribs?”
His eyes widened. “Is that what you have?”
I nodded.
I saw him gulp. “Then yes, that’s exactly the sort of girl I like. Can I . . . ?”
“You want to see my ribs?”
He grinned down at me. “Can I kiss you, Riley?”
I nodded. I couldn’t seem to find my words. He lifted my chin up and leaned down to kiss me. I felt my knees start to give in at the taste of his mouth against mine. My insides sparked, and the spark quickly turned into a blaze from the instant passion that flowed between us like liquid fire. I felt emboldened by the kiss, and as our lips parted, I pulled my dress over my head, exposing my body before his eyes. He looked down at my tattoo, bright and colorful. The same character that he had pointed out from my book of illustrations. He trailed his fingers over the outline and smiled.
“Oh wow, Riley. It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful,” he said.
It was then that I realized I was standing in front of him with just my underwear on while he was fully clothed. I should’ve felt embarrassed or vulnerable, but I only felt thrilled. I wanted him to see me this way. He took off his shirt, and we fell onto the bed together, kissing and touching each other with so much hunger, I wasn’t sure how much longer we’d be able to hold out. I leaned back on the big bed and bit my lip as he pinned me down to kiss me. For a brief second, I wondered what it would be like to be tied to the bed. I had no idea I was even into something like that until that moment, but the thought of Silas taking control of me in that way filled me with a rush of excitement. I thought about suggesting it to him, but it felt too personal, too soon. I would have to get him to do it to me another day when we knew each other a bit better. I liked the idea of there being another time with him. We hadn’t even had sex yet, and already I was thinking of doing it again with him. By the way his eyes roamed over my nearly naked body, it was hard to imagine that I had thought he was into Paisley. I liked the way he was looking at me. I felt his need and his desire for me.
He rolled me over and undid the clasp of my bra. Then he pulled down my underwear, and as I lay on my stomach, I felt him kiss and lick my body. My neck, my back, my ass, in between my legs. He turned me over again, and I watched as he climbed off the bed and took the rest of his clothes off. I asked him if he had a condom.
“I’ll be back,” he said and walked out the door.
I lay in bed for several seconds while I waited for him. The time with him away only made me want him more, and as I lay there, I slipped my fingers inside myself and closed my eyes. I didn’t hear him come back, and when I opened my eyes, he was standing in front of me, smiling down at me. I smiled back at him without any shame.
“I couldn’t help myself,” I said.
He grinned. “I don’t blame you.” He climbed onto the bed, opened my legs and put his tongue where my fingers had been. It was far better than doing it myself, and as I looked down and saw him in between my legs, I felt a rush of desire for him.
He pulled away just before I was about to orgasm, slipped on the condom, and pushed himself inside me. I groaned and arched my back so that he could get in deeper. I liked that we were in this big house together and that we could make as much noise as we wanted and nobody would hear. I put my arms around his waist as he thrust into me, and then I closed my eyes and allowed myself to fully succumb to the moment. I shuddered at the same time that he did, and as I felt him come inside me, I came too.
We lay there for some time after catching our breath, just holding hands. It took a while for my heart rate to get back to normal. The longer I lay there, the more it started to dawn on me that what I had done might not have been the smartest move. Silas was my roommate, not my boyfriend. I needed him to live with me in order to be able to afford the house. What I didn’t need were complications. It wasn’t like he was someone I could just walk away from now. We lived together. And, despite how well we got along together, we barely knew each other. I felt annoyed at myself for what happened. Why had I given in to the temptation so easily? Sure, he was gorgeous, but sex always complicated things. And we had a good thing going. I cringed at the thought of us now stepping around each other with awkward and staggered conversations. Why did we have to ruin a good thing?
“Everything okay?” he asked suddenly. He must’ve sensed that something was up. Even I could tell that I had tensed up next to him.
“Uh, yeah. Everything is fine,” I said. I quickly got up and pulled a blanket around me. “I think I’m going to take a shower.”
“How about I make us a cup of coffee? Or we could have some wine. I think I saw a bottle in the kitchen somewhere.”
“You know, I think I’m actually going to call it a night,” I said without looking him in the eye. I looked around the room, gathering up my clothes. “But thanks for the offer.”
“You are? But it’s so early. We haven’t even had dinner yet. You can’t be going to sleep already?”
I was suddenly very aware of how hungry I was, but I didn’t want him to know. I remembered that I had a chocolate bar in my handbag. I was just going to have to have that for dinner. “Ah, I’m not hungry,” I lied. “I’m not sure why I’m so tired, but I am. And I have a super busy day tomorrow, so I really want to get some sleep.” It wasn’t true at all. I had no idea what I was doing the next day. I hoped he didn’t ask me. I was never very good at lying, and I hadn’t planned yet what I was going to say.
But I think he could sense that I wanted to be left alone. He stood up and picked up his clothes. I looked away as he put them back on, and felt annoyed at the sudden strangeness between us. Not so long ago the two of us could not stop talking; now we were acting like people who had just met each other.
I caught his eye and saw that he was frowning, so I plastered on a smile just like I did when I was working at the bar. He walked up to me, kissed me on the forehead and told me to sleep well. It was a sweet gesture, and one that left me even more confused than before.
“You too,” I said and waited for him to walk out.
The moment he was out the door, I flopped onto the bed and groaned. What was wrong with me? Why had I done this? I needed a hot shower, and a night’s rest. Hopefully, in the morning, everything could go back to the way it had been before.