Chapter Thirty-Seven
Silas
Everything had worked out according to plan. I’d specifically stopped talking to Riley this past week just in case I said something that I shouldn’t. I knew it would make her sad, but I had big plans for making it all up to her. The month leading up to my decision hadn’t been an easy one. I’d had a long talk with Annie one day when Garren wasn’t around. I’d been honest with her about everything, and she’d been honest back.
“Is this what you want?” she asked. “Do you want to be a singer?”
I nodded. “I do.”
She smiled. “Okay, good. We’re getting somewhere. Do you want to be huge? I mean, do you want to travel worldwide and make millions of dollars?”
I shook my head. “No. I want to do well, but I don’t have ambitions that high. It’s about singing to me, not about being famous. I actually don’t like that part too much.”
“Okay. Now, do you want to be with this Riley girl? Or are you not sure of her yet?”
“I’ve never wanted to be with anyone more in my entire life. Yes, I want to be with Riley.”
“Do you love her?”
I looked at Annie. She had just asked me a question I had been avoiding for a long time. But now that it was out in the air, I immediately knew the answer to it. I grinned and nodded. “Yes. I’m madly in love with her.”
“Well then, my darling boy, you have your answer.”
“Do I?”
“You do. You need to go and make things right with Riley. That is the first thing you have to do. You will never be happy without doing that. Then, you need to talk to Garren. You need to be honest with him. You need to see if there is a way you can still make this work without being the big star that he had planned for you. You owe it to him. Remember, he doesn’t know how you feel. He’s only doing for you what he does with all his other clients. He’s a good man. Trust me, Silas. I have worked with Garren for a very long time, and he is a very understanding man. Just be honest with him. That is all he wants.”
And that was exactly what I did. I was very nervous to talk to Garren. I was scared that he was going to tell me how ungrateful I was being. But Annie had been right. Garren listened to me and understood. He said that I didn’t have to make too many decisions right away, but agreed that I should go and talk to Riley first.
“What about the tours?” I asked.
“Let’s just take that one step at a time, shall we? Why don’t we concentrate more on the albums?”
“Really?”
“Sure. You might not do as well as you would’ve if you had toured, but if you are okay with it, then I am fine with that. It frees up my time to do that with my other bands. Why don’t you come this side twice a year to record an album? You can even bring Riley along. Twice a year for a month at a time. And in between that time, you can work on your songs. We can communicate often, but we can produce the songs only when you come in. Or you can set something up on your side. Like I said, we can figure something out. You’re too good to give up on this business, Silas. And to be honest, I’m not ready to let you go. I don't think the world is, either.”
“I don’t want you to let me go,” I said. “I really do want this. And maybe I will want to become more than what I am now and continue with touring. But with Riley being away, and with the whole kidnapping mess, my heart just hasn’t been in it.”
He smiled. “Go and get her. Anyway, it will make for some great coverage. Everyone loves a love story.”
“Speaking of, I have a plan,” I said and outlined my idea for a new song. Once he heard it, he fell in love with it and told me that I had to sing it to Riley for the first time. I knew he wanted to use it all as some sort of big marketing scheme, but I didn’t mind. I was happy for him to do whatever he had to do, and I would do the same. And that was how I ended up back at Riley’s pub, ready to sing my song to her for the first time. I had managed to get Paisley in on the whole thing, who then spoke to her boss. He was delighted to have me play, and they both promised not to tell Riley.
I was used to big arenas now, so standing on stage in such a small space again was unusual for me. It made me feel so much more connected to the audience. The big concerts took so much of that away. I spotted Riley almost immediately, but I tried not to look at her. I was just glad that she was there. I had taken a big breath and sang the song that I had written just for her. Afterwards, I saw that she was crying, and I rushed off stage to kiss her.
Now the two of us were back home, and everything felt right with the world again. I looked at her and grinned.
“Want to go for a ride?”
She smiled. “I would love that.”
She opened the garage, and I saw my bike sitting there, shiny and new looking. I looked at her in surprise.
“I’ve been keeping it clean. I stopped for a while, but I carried on lately. It . . . well, this is going to sound silly . . . but it made me feel closer to you.”
I pictured her in the garage, cleaning it even though I wasn’t there. The image brought a smile to my face.
“You’re the sweetest person in the world; you know that?”
She blushed. “It’s your pride and joy. I wanted to take care of it. Anyway, I’m still hoping you teach me how to ride one day.”
I smiled. “Oh, trust me, I’m going to teach you. We have all the time in the world for that.” She looked at me questioningly when I said that, and I realized that she had no idea what my plans were. She probably thought I was going to leave again. But before she had a chance to answer me, I climbed onto the bike and told her to hop on with me.
We rode to the field. I wished I had thought ahead and brought with a few drinks, and snacks. Or even just a blanket. But I hadn’t intended on going out for a bike ride. It hadn’t been planned at all. We got off the bike and looked around.
“It’s strange being here at night,” she said. “It’s even more peaceful than during the day.”
“Yeah,” I said. “I don’t have a blanket, but do you want to lie on the grass anyway?”
“Oh, we better lie on the grass,” she said. “We can’t come all the way here and not. Anyway, at least this time you don’t have to fix the bike.”
“That was a disaster,” I said as we lay down. “I was so embarrassed.”
“You were? Why?” she asked.
“Because I was trying to impress you and instead I made a fool of myself.”
She giggled. “Oh, I didn’t mind one bit. I watched you work. It was incredibly sexy.”
I turned to look at her. It was dark, but I could see that she was smiling.
“Really?” I still remembered feeling so awkward with her watching me. I had been trying so hard to show off in front of her with the bike, and having it die on me was mortifying. I had no idea that she had been looking at me like that.
“Oh yeah. Trust me; I didn’t stop looking at you. I almost asked you to take off your shirt. I was disappointed when you fixed the bike so quickly.”
I laughed. “Well, that’s good to know. Oh, Riley, it’s so good to be here with you. I feel like I can be me again. I like all the guys on my team, but it’s not the same.”
“Yeah, I feel the same way. Nobody really gets me in the way you do. I keep thinking that I’m dreaming. Am I going to wake up soon and realize that this whole thing has been a dream? I hope not. I don’t want it to be a dream. Did you really just surprise me with the most beautiful song in the world? Did my boss really tell me that I didn’t have to work? Or am I at home still, lying in bed and about to wake up?”
“It’s real. I’m just so glad I managed to pull it off without you figuring anything out. Also, I’m sorry for not calling lately. I really am. I didn’t want to blow my cover and ruin the surprise.”
“I was so upset,” she admitted. “I honestly thought you had finally forgotten about me.”
“Are you kidding me? I would never forget you. I could never. Did you really think that?” I asked.
She turned to face me now. “Yeah, I did. I know that’s not a nice thing to say, but you’re this big star, Silas. I know you didn’t kiss that girl, I believe you when you say that. But I just didn’t think you’d be interested in someone like me once you became famous. I thought I would be too dull for you.”
I laughed. That was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard. “You’re the most interesting girl in the world. I could never forget you. Hell, I could barely concentrate on my songs because of you. Nothing felt right without you. I sometimes feel like I have known you my whole life.”
“I feel the same way. It’s weird to think that a year ago we had never even met. So, what happens now, Silas? I have been trying to muster up the courage to ask you about our future for a while now. But I’ve been too scared. But you’re here now. I have to ask. I need to know. Must I wait for you? Or do you want to go separate ways?”
“I don’t want either of those things,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m staying.”
“Staying?” she asked. I could hear the surprise in her voice. “Seriously?”
“Yeah. I want to stay. I’m going to take a bit of a break from singing for a while. I want to make things right with you. I’ve spent too long away from you and I’ve missed you too much.”
“But, Silas, this is your dream. You can’t give up on it. Not for me. Please.”
“I’m not. I’m definitely not. I’m going to keep going, but I’m not leaving you. I’ll do it from here. I’ve already spoken to my manager, and we have worked everything out. He’s happy with me staying here. I just have to go see him twice a year to record an album. We are still ironing out all the details, but for now, I’m here with you. I have about a week or two off before I start things up again.”
“You’re actually staying.”
“I love you, Riley. I’m definitely staying. I mean . . . if you’ll have me, of course.”
She chuckled. “The house isn’t the same without you. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
I leaned in and kissed her.
“God, I’ve missed kissing you so much. Come on, let’s go home. I think we have a lot of catching up to do.”