We weren’t supposed to see other tonight.

I was going to go home and reflect on my week. I’d work on my glossy exterior, making sure Gavin would never find the crack between this life and my real one in Hawaii.

If I was going to sell the lie then it had to be flawless. So deep even I almost believed it. That kind of commitment meant I needed time to put a plan together before I executed it.

I’d research articles, studies, and blogs to learn how to be in a healthy relationship. What were the correct words one used? How did conflict get resolved? What to do when jealousy flared?

How did nice people make love?

Especially that. I knew the mechanics but I’d never done it.

If I let myself really think about my lack of physical intimacy, I’d know it wasn’t a real surprise. You needed to be vulnerable to be naked.

And I never wanted to be outwardly vulnerable.

I’d spent the majority of my time feeling like I was always in danger of being mortally wounded through people’s careless viciousness. No way would I purposely sign up for more.

Rather, I’d never found anyone worth taking a chance to be invaded. Metaphorically or physically.

And then Gavin came to put a pin in my neat little plans.

“I’m breaking my word to you, Paige.”

“How?”

“I want to see you.”

I didn’t catch on.

“You’ll see me on Monday. I promise.”

“No. I don’t mean at work. I want to see you outside of work. I want to see you tonight.”

“Oh.”

I could get used to this light, fluttery feeling. What was that called again?

I think it’s called joy.

“Can I pick you up tonight? For dinner?”

Of course, I wanted to pounce on an affirmative. But I had to make sure Gavin wouldn’t resent me for being the cause of his rule breaking. Hard experience taught me not to easily make myself someone’s scapegoat.

“Are you sure you want to do that?”

Disappointment tightened his mouth. “You don’t want to go out with me?”

“I do!” I assured him quickly. Too quickly. “It’s just I don’t want you to end up regretting this.”

His full lips eased into a grin. His finger curled around my chin.“I won’t ever regret you, Paige.”

The urge to warn Gavin surfaced. I had to be fair. At least as much as I could when I was lying to him by omission every second of every day.

“You don’t know that, Gavin. I could turn out to be a harpy and then where would you be?”

He coughed out a laugh while saying, “A harpy? I haven’t heard that word since elementary school mythology.”

My nerdy side broke through. I should’ve said bitch instead. Every time I misstepped it was because of something like this. It was in the casual moments that I betrayed my mimicry. Fine cracks, barely noticeable, but there nonetheless.

I needed to distract Gavin from my faux pas and get back on track.

“What I’m trying to say—”

“I know what you’re trying to say,” Gavin broke in gently. “You’re telling me I don’t know you yet. I get it. We don’t know each other that well and from the way we’ve clashed at work…maybe it’s not the start of sunshine and roses.”

True. But I wanted it to be.

I wanted sunshine, roses, puppies, and unicorns. I wanted Gavin and me to be the best thing that had ever happened to either of us.

So I wanted to warn him but not warn him off. Which was silly considering how far I’d been willing to go to deceive him.

“It could be. It could actually be really nice.”

“I think so too, love.” Gavin cupped my chin. His earnest gaze broke me a little. “Can I take you out to dinner tonight, Paige? Would you do that for me?”

My mask slid off enough to again allow my natural shyness to show. I looked down and bit my lip.

“I’d like that.”

“Good. Can I swing by your place in, say, an hour and a half?”

You don’t have to pick me up. I’m ready to go now!

Thank goodness I finally found some kind of filter between my mouth and thoughts.

“I’ll be ready.”

“Good.”

Gavin hugged me. I wrapped my arms around his lean waist and closed my eyes. When I was younger I used to imagine what it would be like to hug him. Of course, then I only thought of him with pure innocence.

My body reacted with very little innocence.

Instantly, I imagined us like this but without our clothes on. I didn’t have to guess at Gavin’s body. My touch felt the hard muscles beneath his immaculate suit. He would be magnificent naked.

Would he like what he saw of me?

Cheeks pink with excitement, I reeled myself back. It was just dinner. Not sex. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

“You feel so good, love,” Gavin sighed with a tight squeeze.

The pet name unnerved me but also felt so lovely. I’d love to hear it again.

“You do too.”

I could spare the confession. He wouldn’t put much stock in it, thinking it was sweet nothings, like calling me “love”.

“Paige, I could hug you forever.” He sighed again and then let me go. I missed Gavin’s touch already. “You better go before I can’t let you.”

I blinked, shyness out in the open, before pulling my mask back into place.

“Okay then. See you in about an hour and a half.”

Gavin’s serious face didn’t intimidate this time. I saw it for what it was.

Suppression.

“See you, Paige.”

“Bye, Gavin.”

I turned around and sauntered out of the conference room like I made dates all the time.

Inside, a veritable symphony of happiness played in my heart.

I heard the music all the way downstairs, in the cab, and into my apartment. I danced to it as I pulled out outfit after outfit until I decided on a slinky dress. I hummed to it as I carefully showered and groomed myself even though I doubted we’d do anything past a goodnight kiss.

Which…oh my. My lips tingled just from the thought.

I swayed to my internal symphony as I let my hair down and freshened my curls. I sang to it as I reddened my lips and darkened my eyes with kohl. I twirled to it as I slipped on my lingerie, dress, and heels. I ran to it when my phone rang.

“Hello?”

Did that breathless little voice belong to me? Apparently, yes.

“Hello, Paige. I’m about to enter your building. Will you let me up?”

“I’ve already cleared you with security.”

“Good. See you shortly.”

The symphony rose to a crescendo when the door buzzed. Gavin was on the other side. Tonight was a big step to being like everyone else.

Normal. Happy. Free.

Pulling open the door, I took one look at him and whispered, “Wow.”

He changed into a black suit, white shirt, and teal tie. Freshly shaved and looking so handsome I ached, Gavin was every girl’s dream.

Or rather my dream.

“That’s my line, Paige.” He coughed and said, “Here. These are for you.”

Taking the bouquet of white roses, I sniffed them and smiled. “They smell nice.”

“They don’t have a scent. They’ve been bred for perfection and lost their aroma as a result.”

How could I forget one moment what a stickler for honesty Gavin was?

“You’re right.”

Gavin leaned down and sniffed them.

“I’d rather them be imperfect and real than fake and perfect, wouldn’t you?”

My smile flickered. I didn’t believe in prophecies but if I did I’d say this was a big one.