CHAPTER 12
Charlie
The last thing I wanted to do was talk about my family problems. I already had enough to contend with, and this was going to push me over the edge, even though I knew Gavin deserved to know the truth. “Please… just let it go, Gavin.”
He looked so worried about me, which was damn sweet of him, even if just minutes earlier, it felt like he’d been putting some distance between us. “I’ll let it go, love, even if I’m going to keep reminding you just how special you are.”
His words and kindness had me going up onto my toes to kiss his cheek. “I don’t think you’ll ever know how much your words mean to me.”
His eyes locked on mine, and he looked at me with such an intensity, it made my breath catch. It felt as though time stood still, the air between us crackling with a sexual energy that was impossible to ignore. I could hear my heart hammering away, and when he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me as if I was the very air he breathed, I felt his touch down to my very soul.
His fingers sinking into my hair as his tongue swept over mine, our kiss deepening as I let go of all my hang-ups, and tried to just live in the moment. Before long, Gavin was pulling away, even though he still held me close, our breathing heavy.
When he spoke, his voice was thick with need. “I know I probably shouldn’t have done that, but at the moment, I can’t say that I’m sorry. And if I’m being honest, I make no guarantees that I won’t do it again.”
Unable to resist him, and riding a high I had never felt before, I leaned in and stole just one more kiss, my lips pressed sweetly to his. “And I can guarantee that if you kiss me again, I won’t stop you.”
I’d never been so bold, but there was something about Gavin that made me feel different about myself—and I liked it. His words… his actions… they made me feel special. He made me feel special. And after nearly two decades of feeling like I wasn’t good enough, of feeling like everything was my fault, it was damn nice not to have to carry that burden.
Because when Gavin looked at me, he saw the person I wanted to be, instead of the person I’d been told I was.
It didn’t take me long at all to grab the few things I had, and with our bags packed and the dogs ready to go, I found myself tucked against Gavin’s side as we rode off to some undisclosed location in an FBI vehicle, while the dogs settled down in the back of the massive bullet-proof SUV. It took us about three hours to get to where we were going, which turned out to be a good sized cabin buried up high in the mountains and surrounded by heavily wooded forests.
“The cabin has been fully stocked for you, and all the lines in and out of this place are secure. There’s a vehicle in the garage, and you’ll find new cell phones and laptops inside. If there’s anything at all that you need, if there are any concerns you have, or any questions, don’t hesitate to call us. We won’t be far.” Agent Latimer led the way to the cabin and got us settled while the others kept watch, but before long it was once more just me and Gavin and the dogs.
Gavin crossed to my side, his brow furrowed with worry. “How are you holding up, love? I know this is a lot to take in.”
That was an understatement, since this felt a lot like some sort of witness protection program, albeit a temporary one. Add to that the little fact my boss had just been murdered and there was likely still a hit out on my life. “Honestly, I don’t know. My life couldn’t have been any more boring or normal. And now, I’m under FBI protection, someone wants me dead because of a weaponized virus I had nothing to do with, and I’m temporarily living with a man I’ve only just met, when I haven’t even been on a date in close to a decade.”
His lips quirked into a smile that lit up his blue eyes. “A decade, huh? Somehow I don’t believe that.”
“Okay. Maybe that’s a slight exaggeration—but honestly, not by a whole lot. I work too many hours to ever get the chance to meet anyone, and other than the guys I work with, which are a definite no, or my pizza delivery guy, there’s not a whole lot of opportunity. I mean, it took a hit on my life to get me to meet someone new. And last I checked, it’s not exactly the best way to meet guys.” I couldn’t help but smile when he laughed, my mood improving drastically by simply having Gavin around.
“I don’t know… I kind of like the whole damsel in distress dating method. And I’m all for strong powerful women who can kick ass, but I won’t deny it’s kind of nice to be able to save the day and be the hero, every now and then.” With his hands stuffed in his pockets, he shrugged his shoulders and gave me another easy smile, so he looked not just sexy, but adorable—if a six foot three, muscular man, with smoldering sexy looks could be adorable.
“Well, there’s no one else I’d rather have saving me when I’m in need of a hero.” If I didn’t know any better, I’d guess that I was actually flirting.
Me.
Flirting.
The world must be coming to an end.
I think I even managed to not look like a total idiot while doing so. Except, of course, that the mere thought of me flirting had my cheeks flaming with embarrassment. What the hell was I doing? Not that I could think straight with Gavin around.
“Sweetheart…” He brushed the back of his fingers against my hot cheek, his eyes locked on mine. “You’re blushing.”
“Am I?” A second wave of heat hit my cheeks as I pretended to be oblivious to the effect he had on me.
I wasn’t sure what to say or do next. I was just so clueless, and clearly in way over my head. But before I could figure it out, Gavin grabbed my bag and snagged my hand. “Come on, love… let’s check out our digs.”
I forced myself to swallow down my disappointment, though I liked that he was, at the very least, maintaining some sort of physical contact between us.
Quaint and cozy was the best way to describe the cabin. With wooden beams vaulting the ceilings, shiplap on the walls, and a massive stone fireplace, I could just imagine sitting in front of the fire, curled up on the sofa, a snow storm raging outside as I snuggled up in Gavin’s arms.
As if that was going to happen.
But still… a girl could dream. And if a girl was going to dream, she’d certainly be dreaming of someone just like Gavin, since he was nothing short of amazing.
Gavin dropped my bags in the master bedroom, taking the room across the hall from mine for himself, no doubt so he would be close by should I need him. As small as the home was, it didn’t take us long to conclude our tour, finishing up on the back deck which overlooked the mountain ridge.
I turned to Gavin, grabbing his arm in my excitement. “It’s just so gorgeous here. Though I lived in the country when I was younger, we never had views like this.”
“The views really are stunning.” But when I turned to face Gavin his eyes were on me, not on the view. Which of course had me blushing once again. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips before pulling me back inside and towards the kitchen. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving. Here’s hoping they really did leave us a well-stocked fridge and pantry. They have no idea how much I can eat.”
Luckily, they had. “Let me cook for you. What are you in the mood for?”
He groaned, his gaze drifting to my lips as he spoke, his voice gruff and sexy. “Sweetheart, what I’m hungry for isn’t on the menu.”
I wanted to tell him that he could have whatever he wanted—happily. And yet, who was I kidding? I didn’t know the first thing about men. I was totally inexperienced, and Gavin was way out of my league, even if we seemed to have a fair few things in common. But there was a reason I happily stayed holed up in my lab, and that was because I was clueless when it came to being social. Everyone always thought of me as quiet and mousy, even though I knew there was more to me than what others saw.
And if my own parents had never even seen me for who I was, what hope did I have of getting others to.
I shook myself free of my thoughts—and pushed away my father’s voice from my head as his words started to weasel their way into my head. I was getting damn tired of not living up to expectations that were impossible to meet. I was never going to be able to take my brother’s place. So why bother?
Knowing that Gavin would likely eat anything I put in front of him, I started pulling out ingredients. “Why don’t you get a fire going in the fireplace, and I’ll get started on dinner?”
“I guess that’ll have to do—for now.”