Jane had never thought that sitting could be so exhausting. For eight hours, she’d just been sitting in the hospital waiting room’s hard orange chair. Couldn’t they at least make the chairs a bit more comfortable? There was a new product for McKay’s innovation division. She’d get right on it…as soon as she got the news Dreama was going to live.
As soon as Ryder had screamed for her to call 911, she’d known something terrible had happened to Dreama. Her mind had conjured up a dozen reasons Dreama might need an ambulance. Not one of them came close to reality. Holding Maddox close to her chest, Jane had cautiously stepped inside her apartment. What she’d seen would haunt her until her dying day.
Dreama broken and shattered like a china doll.
Her legs twisted and bent in the wrong direction.
Blood splattered all around her. On her. On the walls. On Ryder.
It was like a scene out of a horror movie.
Jane couldn’t help but wonder, if she hadn’t gone to the park with Ryder…
Could she have protected Dreama?
Or would that have been Jane lying lifeless on the bloody carpet?
What if Maddox had been there?
She shuddered to think about it.
The minutes that followed were a blur. As the paramedics worked on Dreama, the police checked the apartment to make sure the attacker was no longer there. Then the cops had asked Jane and Ryder a whole bunch of questions, one right after the other. She couldn’t even remember answering them. But one thing remained vivid. When the paramedics had taken Dreama away on a stretcher, Jane got a close look at her ravaged face.
She wasn’t embarrassed to admit she’d vomited right then and there.
Before Jane had recovered, Dreama was already in the ambulance and speeding to the nearest hospital.
The police had allowed Jane to change her clothes and pack a bag for her and Maddox. The apartment was officially a crime scene and off-limits for the time being.
Not that she wanted to stay there.
Somehow, Ryder had stayed calm throughout the ordeal, calling Tristan so that he could tell Isabella and notify Dreama’s parents. It hadn’t taken long before they’d shown up at the hospital, along with Dreama’s aunts and uncles and cousins. There were so many of them. Dreama had so many people who loved her. They practically filled up all the seats of the waiting room. All except Isabella.
She refused to sit.
Instead, she paced back and forth across the waiting room. Every once in a while, Tristan would stop her and hug her, whisper something in her ear. She’d nod, and while she’d resume her pacing, it was slower, her body more relaxed. Jane wondered what he said to calm her.
Jane hated that she was jealous. Not only because Isabella had someone who so obviously loved her or because she had an entire family there for support, but because she could feel. Isabella had cried and raged and at one point had even smiled. In fact, everyone in the room had been teary-eyed.
Not Jane.
To her, everyone else was running at super-speed while she was stuck in slow motion. She didn’t have the energy to do anything. Not even cry.
She was completely numb.
Thank God for Ryder. He hadn’t left her side for a second, sharing the responsibility of tending to Maddox, without caring who noticed. It just wasn’t important at the moment.
Nothing was important but Dreama.
It was just after eight p.m. when Dreama’s surgeon came into the room, wearing fresh scrubs and a blank expression. Everyone went silent as Dreama’s parents stood for the news.
A buzzing permeated her body, yanking her out of the uncomfortable numbness. Her pulse began to race as the fear she’d first experienced upon seeing Dreama after the attack returned with a vengeance. Jane’s heart physically hurt, like it was being squeezed in a vise, and she couldn’t catch her breath. Dark spots began clouding her vision and the room spun.
Was Dreama alive?
Ryder shifted Maddox on his lap and grabbed her hand. The simple touch grounded her, reminded her she wasn’t alone. The pain in her chest diminished and she found herself able to breathe again. As if he was her anchor in a storm, she gripped his hand tighter.
“How is she?” Dreama’s father asked the doctor, his tone weary and nervous. He held his wife close to his side.
“She’s out of surgery and doing well,” said the doctor loudly, knowing everyone was listening. He then lowered his voice, but Jane was close enough to still hear him as he continued. “We were able to stop the internal bleeding, but I’m sorry to report that despite our best efforts, we had to perform a complete hysterectomy. There was just too much damage from the beating. We also removed her spleen and repaired a nick to her right kidney. She has numerous broken bones that will need setting once she’s strong enough to go back into surgery. For now, we’ve just stabilized them with casts.” He paused and put a hand on Dreama’s mother’s shoulder. “Also, I thought you’d want to know that we found no evidence of sexual assault.”
“When can we bring her home?” Dreama’s father asked.
“Expect her to be in the hospital for at least six to eight weeks and physical rehabilitation after that.” The doctor raised his voice again. “We’ll be moving her into a room soon, but she’s probably going to be unconscious for several more hours. I suggest you all go home and get some rest. Visiting hours begin at nine a.m. for immediate family members only.”
She wasn’t surprised when Dreama’s mother shunned the surgeon’s advice and announced her decision to stay. If it were her child, she’d do the same.
God forbid.
Jane took a deep breath and bowed her head, relieved Dreama had made it through surgery and was alive. Her eyes burned as if tears were about to form, but they refused to come.
No longer holding Ryder’s hand, Jane stared at the spot where the surgeon had announced the news. She knew it was time to go but she couldn’t get herself to move. The chatter around her grew quieter and quieter until Ryder stood in front of her with Maddox in his car seat.
“Come on. It’s time to go home,” he said gently, as if she were a child who needed coaxing.
Home?
She didn’t have a home anymore. She couldn’t live in that apartment. Not without Dreama.
Lacing his fingers with Jane’s, Ryder pulled her to her feet and with an arm around her shoulders, led her out of the cold, sterile hospital and into the night. She didn’t know what road lay ahead for her, but one thing was clear.
She couldn’t navigate it without Ryder.
* * *
Ryder slid into the driver’s seat of Jane’s car and closed the door, hoping it wouldn’t wake Maddox. Of course, judging by what he’d seen today, the kid could just about sleep through anything. Still, he didn’t want to take the chance. Not now when Jane so obviously needed him.
She was in shock.
Pale and listless, she hadn’t spoken much all day. Hadn’t eaten more than half a candy bar. Hadn’t smiled or cried or even met anyone’s gaze. It was as if she was physically there but the rest of her had checked out.
Everyone else had been too caught up in their own grief to notice.
But not him. Except for Maddox, no one mattered more to him than Jane.
Sitting by her side for eight hours, he realized if he hadn’t been there, she would’ve been on her own. And that was fucking unacceptable to him. Someone as warm and funny and caring as Jane deserved to have a room full of people who were there to take care of her.
He drove out of the hospital parking lot onto the dark street and headed toward his house. A single headlight made the same turn. For a moment, Ryder thought it was a motorcycle but as he looked in the rearview mirror, he realized it was a car with only one working headlight.
Like the one that had run Jane off the road.
For the time being, he kept the news to himself. Jane had gone through enough today. She didn’t need to worry about anything else. Besides, plenty of cars fit that description. Still, he’d stay extra vigilant and keep an eye on it.
Staring out the passenger side window, Jane finally broke the silence. “Who would hurt someone like Dreama?”
He wasn’t sure whether she was talking to herself or to him.
“I keep going over the what-ifs. What if Dreama hadn’t been sick and had gone to work as she’d planned? What if we hadn’t gone to the community center? What if we hadn’t run into Ian? Would we have gone home earlier and stopped it from happening? I can’t help but thinking if only I’d done something different, anything different, Dreama wouldn’t be in the hospital fighting for her life.”
The car wasn’t exactly the best place for a conversation like this, but it couldn’t wait until home. “Or it could have been you. None of this was your fault. The blame falls on the person or persons who hurt her.” He didn’t believe in coincidences. The police theorized that Dreama had interrupted a burglary and frankly, Ryder didn’t bother correcting them. Informing them that they were wrong would prove futile when his father was concerned.
She turned her head to look at him. “I didn’t think…” Her voice cracked. “I should have warned her.”
The guilt in her eyes slayed him. “You had no reason to think she was in danger.”
“I’m not sure I believe that. Not when two people in my department just died and I’m walking around with an SD card that may be the reason why.”
Noting the car with the one headlight was still behind them, Ryder turned his car into his neighborhood. He breathed a sigh of relief when the other vehicle didn’t follow, but instead, continued straight down the main road. “I know I wanted to wait until we found the antivirus program, but I think it’s time we check what’s on that SD card.”
She blinked a few times as if coming out of a fog. “Do you have a computer you’re willing to lose if the antivirus software doesn’t work?”
“I’ve got two old ones I’ve kept for backup in case. Why don’t you get Maddox settled and I’ll grab them from my home office?”
Inside his house, Jane pulled the SD card from her purse and dropped it into his waiting palm. He showed her the extra bedroom where she could set up the Pack ’n Play for Maddox.
If they weren’t in such a hurry, he would’ve given her the grand tour. He would love to see her face as she saw the potential his house held. Would she like the kitchen or was it too small? What did she think of the neighborhood? Could she imagine herself and Maddox living there? And wait until she saw his huge fenced-in backyard.
After retrieving his old computers, he placed them on his dining room table. He decided to hit the virus with the most comprehensive program he had available, but his gut told him he was about to destroy yet another computer. Two people had died because of whatever was on that SD card. Even the most powerful antivirus programs probably wouldn’t be enough to fix the card so that they could access the files.
Jane’s soft footsteps pattered on the hardwood floor as she entered the dining room. “He’s sound asleep for the moment.” She put a baby monitor on the table. “His schedule is off for the day, but I think we should have a couple of hours before he wakes up for his last night feeding.” She gestured to the computer as she sat in a chair beside him. “Any luck?”
“Just starting, but I wouldn’t get your hopes up.” She watched in curious anticipation as he inserted the card. He ran the antivirus software on the SD card. A few minutes later, a message popped up that the software did not detect any viruses or malware. “Fucking genius,” he mumbled.
He tried opening the file. Normally, if a card was corrupt, he’d receive an error message.
That wasn’t what happened.
Code scrolled up the screen like the credits of a Star Wars movie. And then on a loud buzz, the screen went completely black just as Jane had described to him.
“Yeah, that’s what happened when I tried opening it. But I didn’t see the code before. That’s new.”
Because the virus was learning.
“I’ve never seen anything like it in all the years I’ve been playing around with computers,” he said in awe. “This isn’t the typical virus or worm you pick up on the Web. I was right. Evan intentionally designed a virus to protect the contents of the file. Every time someone tries to open the file, the virus adds another layer of protection to it. Eventually, it will become impossible to open, even if we find the antivirus program he wrote for it. Tomorrow morning, we need to go search his office. It has to be there somewhere.”
Jane went quiet, her brows knitted in a frown and her finger to her lip. “Is it possible to email an antivirus as a file?”
“I suppose it’s possible. Why?”
“Remember I mentioned Evan had sent me an email but that the file was corrupted?”
He thought back to that conversation. He’d been so focused on the SD card, he hadn’t paid much attention to anything else. “Tell me about the email.”
“The message of his email said, ‘Thought you should see this.’ When I clicked on the attachment, a bunch of code flashed on the screen and then a giant yellow smiley face filled the screen.”
“A yellow…” Ryder scratched his head for a moment as he processed Jane’s information. “Did your computer still work right after?”
“Yeah,” Jane said, fidgeting with the ends of her hair. “I thought I’d gotten lucky.”
“Maybe you did,” he murmured. A rush of excitement stirred in his belly. “When you clicked on the attachment, it’s possible you downloaded the program that will allow you to read the files on the SD card. Your work computer is immune from the virus.”
Guilt flickered in her eyes. “But I erased the email and whatever downloaded onto my computer.”
Ryder bit down on his lip to keep himself from swearing out loud.
Jane might have ruined their only chance at finding out what the hell was on that card.
“We need to access your computer at work and see if the antivirus program is still on it.” He stood and offered his hand. “But not tonight. You should rest. Come to bed. I promise I won’t lay a hand on you. It’s enough that you and Maddox are here safe with me. Just let me hold you.”
She intertwined her fingers with his but didn’t get up from the table. “What if I told you that isn’t going to be enough for me? Would you do something for me?”
Didn’t she realize by now there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her? “Anything. Everything.”
Staring into his eyes, she stood. “Take me downstairs.”