“What? Are you serious? Jordan, are you okay?” Sasha paces the living room at a frantic pace. She’s freaking me out. I haven’t seen her look this worried since she fled D.C. “Yeah, no I get it. Please keep me posted on Noah and Mel. I’ll run things until you get back.”

Sasha nods her head as if he can see her, and she finally stops pacing, her wide eyes meeting mine. “If you need me for anything, I’m here. Anytime. You know that, J, right? Good, because I mean it. I love you. Please be safe.” She exhales and then tosses her head back and laughs. “Yes, I’ll take care of your bastard cat too. Anything for you.”

Sasha tosses her phone onto the table and plops down next to me on the couch. “There was an incident at the bar tonight.”

Bastards and Dangerous performed tonight, and security was increased tenfold at the last minute. Sasha told me it was because Jordan’s brother Noah has a batshit crazy stalker.

“What happened?”

“Noah, his girlfriend Amelia, AKA Mel, and their bodyguard were ambushed outside the club. Jordan, his brother Sawyer, and their bodyguard had just left. They got a distress call and came back just in time to save Noah and Mel. They’re in the hospital. They’ll be okay, thankfully, but J’s a mess.”

I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around them. “I can only imagine.”

Sasha shakes her head. “I know you empathize, but this is a bit more complicated for Jordan. His past is his to tell, but what he went through makes our past look like a day at an amusement park. This is going to light his anxiety on fire.”

Poor Jordan. I don’t have anxiety, but my mom did. It was awful to watch her struggle when it got bad.

“How can we help him?”

With a cocked brow, the corner of her mouth lifts into a small smirk. “We?”

I brush invisible lint off my pants. “Of course, we. If I can help, I want to. He’s your best friend, Sasha, and that makes him important to me too.”

“Allie, are you crushing on Jordan?”

I choke back my laugh. “He’s hot, Sasha, but I just got out of a relationship. The last thing I need is to dive into a new one.”

She rolls her eyes at me. “Please … you may have finally left Evan, but you haven’t been in love with him for a long time. His affair was the excuse you needed to get out of D.C. and be you for a change.”

“And who would that be exactly?”

Sasha shrugs her shoulders. “Whoever you want to be, Allie. That’s the beauty of it all. Be someone you never thought you could be. Write a book like Noah’s girlfriend did. Or become a lawyer like you wanted to when we were kids. Hell, be a sexually adventurous twenty-six-year-old woman and fuck all the men you’ve been missing out on the last six years. Whatever you decide, be authentic to you for a change. If that means fucking Jordan, go for it. Nothing should hold you back.”

“Tyler might.”

Dammit. Where did that come from?

Sasha howls with laughter and stomps her feet. “I knew you liked him!”

“I don’t know him enough to like him,” I counter, but she’s still laughing so hard she snorts.

“Girl, please … this is me you’re talking to.” She composes herself and raises her eyes to meet mine. “Seriously, Al, Tyler isn’t an issue if you want to fuck J. Tyler is only going to be an issue if you fall in love with him.”

“What’s their deal?” I reach for my water, and Sasha makes herself comfortable on the other end of the couch, mimicking my pose with her arms around her knees.

“I don’t like to talk about Jordan behind his back, even with my best friend. There are a few things I can tell you though. J is fiercely loyal and will do anything for his friends and employees. He’s tough and isn’t an open book to many people. It takes time for him to warm up to someone. If he chooses to, you will have his loyalty for life. If you ever cross him … Well, just don’t ever do that.”

“He’s not violent, is he?”

Sasha shakes her head. “Nothing like that. Jordan just isn’t one for second chances. Tyler is the only exception I’ve ever seen to that rule. The most important people in Jordan’s life are his family, especially Sawyer. They share a … unique bond.”

I have so many questions, but I have to be careful what I ask because Sasha will shut me down if she feels I’m being intrusive.

“Do you think it’s hard for him to have such famous brothers and friends?”

Sasha yawns and then stretches out her legs. “Nah, he loves them and only wants what makes them happy. He is excited this is their last year on tour though. He misses the fuck out of them when they’re gone all the time.”

“And J doesn’t care that you and Sawyer …”

“That we fuck occasionally?”

I nod, and she smirks. “He’s not fond of it, but he knows better than to think we’d get attached to each other. Sawyer’s a good fuck, but that’s all. I think he’s got eyes on someone now too.”

“Does that bother you?”

“Allie, you know me better than that. There are plenty of dicks in the sea, and I’ve yet to take one for a drive that couldn’t be replaced with a new, sexier, longer-lasting model.”

I laugh. “Only you, Sasha. Speaking of dicks though… what’s the deal with Tyler? Why is he the exception to Jordan’s rule?”

Sasha taps her nose. “That is the million-dollar question. I figure J loves him, but there is something off with their dynamic.”

“How so?”

“I’ve never really figured it out. Tyler is good-looking, nice, he watches out for J, and he’s head-over-heels in love with the man. It’s like Prince Charming is wrapped up in this pretty package and Jordan can’t see him for what he is.”

“Have you ever asked him why?”

Sasha’s brows furrow as she considers my question. “It’s not my place, Allie. If Jordan wants to tell me, he knows he can. I’m exhausted. Now that we’re on bar duty until Jordan comes back to work, we should both get some sleep. It’s going to be a busy few days.”

The next few days were busy but also enlightening. It was incredible to see Sasha in her element. She ran the bar as if it were her own. She shut down the press quickly and efficiently. Even though the incident happened four days ago, the bar was hopping with fans of Bastards and Dangerous—or BAD, as the world calls them—most of the time.

Jordan is supposed to come back tomorrow, which is Wednesday, but Sasha isn’t holding her breath. She says he just doesn’t quite sound like himself yet. It’s hard for me to picture him so down, but I also haven’t known him very long.

“Allie, I need a huge favor.”

“Sure. What’s up?”

“I completely zoned and forgot to feed Fat Bastard.”

My eyes dart across the bar as I hiss, “That’s no way to talk about the customers. Where is he? I’ll take his dinner up and apologize.”

Sasha laughs so hard, tears stream down her cheeks. “Oh my God,” she chokes out, but I’m not sure what is so funny.

“Seriously, Sasha, that’s not nice.”

“Sweet, sweet, Allie. It’s been so long, I almost forgot how precious you really are. Fat Bastard is Jordan’s cat.”

My expression softens. I love cats.

“Nope, don’t get that dreamy look in your eyes. That cat was created by Lucifer himself and somehow escaped the seventh circle of Hell and ended up as Jordan’s sidekick. He hates everyone except Jordan and little kids. He will hiss and growl …” She pauses and nods at my disbelieving face. “Yes, he will growl at you and toss up his paw like he’s going to claw out your eyeballs. He won’t actually do any of that. He’s all bark and no action, but I wanted to warn you.”

Sasha isn’t a pet person, so I know this cat can’t be that bad. “Give me the keys and text me his address.”

“Thank you! You’re saving my ass. Go home after you feed him and call it a night. You’re not going to want to come back after dealing with that asshole anyway.”

One of the girls at the bar who had a few too many looks up at me. “Oh, honey, it’s okay. We’ve all been there. Sometimes if you drop to your knees and blow him right off the bat, it avoids the whole argument.”

I choke back a laugh. “Uh … thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.”

With a little help from GPS, I arrive at Jordan’s place about ten minutes later. It’s a cute little house from what I can tell. Locking the car, I keep my phone in my hand until I’ve got the front door open.

The living room light is on, for which I’m thankful, and a big orange and black cat comes strutting in from another room. He’s giant, but he’s so freaking adorable.

“Hey, sweetheart. I bet you’re hungry, aren’t you?”

Crouching down to the floor, I click my tongue at him. I swear he cocked a brow and is assessing me to see if I’m worthy. So far, no hissing, so that’s a good thing. He’s apprehensive, but I can win him over.

Following Sasha’s instructions, I easily find the kitchen and his food. After emptying the can into his dish, I look around the room. My gaze lands on his dirty water bowl. Sasha has probably been filling it up but not cleaning it since she’s not a pet person.

Once I’ve cleaned his dish and filled it with fresh water, the cat peruses it with an interested stare. I make my way back into the living room but feel bad about leaving him alone. He’s been alone for days, and so far, the mean cat Sasha described is nowhere in sight.

Suddenly, he nudges against my legs, his strong purr reverberating up my body. He’s desperate for attention. It won’t kill me to sit with him for a few minutes.

“Hey, sweetheart.” I take a seat on the couch, and he hops up and sits next to me. I’m surprised by how gracefully he moves for such a large cat. Reaching forward so he sees my hand, I tentatively pet his head. He leans into my touch and purrs louder, and I reward him with some light scratches. Before I know it, he’s curled up into a big, furry ball on my lap. As he continues to hum his deep pleasure, I begin to stroke the length of his body. Poor cat only wants some love.

“You’re just a big ol’ loveable ball of fur, aren’t you? Why did your daddy name you Fat Bastard? That’s just mean.”

“Because that’s what he is to most people.”

I jump and grab the cat, who isn’t pleased I disturbed his resting place. “Jesus, Jordan! You scared the crap out of me.”

He leans back against the wall, a grin kicking up at the corner of his mouth. Jordan seems tired but also quite amused. “Sorry, I didn’t expect anyone to be in my house. And I definitely didn’t expect to see my ornery cat curled up in your lap. Did you cast a spell on him?”

“He’s really that bad? I thought Sasha was exaggerating. All I did was feed him, give him water, and talk to him.”

Jordan takes a seat next to me, and I swear the temperature in here just rose about ten degrees. What is it about him that affects me like this? He’s not my type at all. Then again, my type hasn’t worked out so well for me either.

“Fat Bastard earned his name all by himself. Maybe you should have been the one to find him instead of me. I’ve never seen him take to someone like this, except with kids, but kids are pretty special in their own right, so I figured that was probably normal.”

Oh my God, he likes kids.

I’m not sure how to reply because I’m still stuck on the kid thing, but I get a reprieve when my phone rings. Jordan passes it to me and accidentally hits the speaker button.

“Hello? Allie … Christ, Allie, it’s about time! Are you finally going to talk to me?”

Shit. Evan is pissed. Jordan’s eyes cloud over like a thunderous rainstorm as he scowls at my phone.

“Evan, I can’t talk right now.”

“The hell you can’t. The gala is in three days, Allie. We’re announcing our engagement, your father is out of his mind, and he froze your trust fund. You have no money, Allie. It’s time to stop having a tantrum and come home.”

This is so embarrassing. My gaze locks on J’s, and I mouth “I’m sorry.”

“Evan, I suggest you do some damage control. Find the trollop you were fucking and announce your engagement to her instead for all I care. As I said in my letter, I’m not coming back. I’m sorry if you were planning to live off my trust fund, but if I can live without it, so can you.”

“You selfish bitch!” Evan rages.

Jordan’s eyes widen before he opens his mouth, and when he does, I’m not sure if I want to kiss him or punch him—or both.

“Babe, come back to bed. My cock misses your lips.”

“Who the hell is that?!” Evan screams.

Jordan nudges the cat to the floor and scoots closer to me. “This is the man Allie is currently fucking. Who are you?”

Evan sputters, and I can picture him losing his cool. “Allie, what is going on?”

Jordan flips me onto his lap, and I squeal in surprise. My eyes widen as he mouths “Go with it.”

What do I have to lose at this point?

Jordan leans in closer, holding the phone between us. “Come on, babe. Hang up the phone and let’s go back to bed.”

“Bed? That’s my fiancée you’re talking about. Allie Bear, tell me this is some kind of sick joke,” Evan whines.

“There’s no ring on her finger. Besides, possession is nine tenths of the law, and since her pussy was just wrapped around my dick, I’d say that makes her more mine than yours right now. Wouldn’t you?”

My cheeks flush as J runs his fingers across one with a lazy grin.

“Come on, Bear, tell him you’re just paying me back. A little quid pro quo, right?”

Jordan snickers. “You call her Bear? That’s adorable, but I think she’s more of a tigress myself. My little Allie Cat.” Jordan drops his mouth to my neck, and I can’t help the moan that escapes me. “Hear that, Evan? Doesn’t sound like anyone’s fiancée to me.” Jordan’s lips ghost over mine, and I whimper. It’s been a long time since I’ve been this attracted to someone, if ever.

“This isn’t over, Allie. Do you hear me?” Evan is probably redder than a beet, but when Jordan lowers his mouth to mine, it erases the image of Evan in my mind.

He kisses me loudly, like a man on a mission. Weaving his hands through my hair, he pulls me close. J nips my bottom lip, and I gasp in pleasure, his length growing beneath me as I press into him with a contented sigh. He turns off my phone and tosses it to the opposite side of the couch.

Jordan’s mouth closes over mine, and I fall into his kiss with all my senses. His tongue meets mine and claims it. This isn’t a sweet getting-to-know-you kiss. This is a sexual awakening I never knew I was missing, and I want more. Evan is already a distant memory as I press myself closer while losing myself in his kiss. As I tug on his hair, he growls into my mouth. I remember the freshly fucked look he had to him when we met, and I want to be the one to make him look that way. I want to be the one on my knees for him.

When he slides his hands under my shirt and brushes my nipples through my lace bra, we lose our connection as a cry escapes my lips. Locking his mouth on my throat, he trails a path with his tongue up to my earlobe. I’m about to combust, and I can’t remember the last time I was this turned on. But I work for him, and then there’s Tyler …

Fuck … Ty.

“Jordan, stop! I’m sorry, we can’t do this.” I start to scramble off of him, but he grabs my hips, locking me in place.

“Allie, hold on … please.”

My eyes meet his, and I momentarily lose my breath. I’ve got a gut feeling Jordan doesn’t say please often.

“Jordan, I can’t be a homewrecker. I’m sorry, but that’s not me.”

“Whoa, where did that come from?”

I turn my head because I can’t look at him right now. I’m too vulnerable and so on edge from needing that orgasm, I could cry.

“Look at me, Al.” He cups my cheeks with both hands and turns my face toward him. “I have one rule. What is it?”

“Not to lie. But we’re not at work, Jordan, so it doesn’t apply.”

“That rule always applies, no matter what.” His tone is firm. “I need transparency in all my relationships. Work, friendship, family and sexual. Now, I’m going to ask you one more time. Why would you say that?”

“Because you’re with Tyler. I just left a cheater; I can’t be one.”

J brushes my cheek with this thumb. “Did you love him?”

“That is such a complicated question. Years ago, yes, but recently, no. Not for at least a year, maybe longer. Do you love Tyler?”

Jordan kisses my cheek and moves me off his lap and onto the couch. “Want a shot of tequila?”

“Will you answer my question?”

He looks at me and shakes his head in disbelief. “Yeah, after a shot.”

“Okay, fair enough.”

Jordan disappears into the kitchen and returns with a bottle of tequila and two shot glasses. We lift them together and toss them back. He leans back onto the couch and pulls me onto his lap so I’m straddling him. “I like you better here.”

His eyes drop to my lips and then he bites his lower one and shakes his head. “I’m not with Tyler.”

“You could have fooled me. You guys looked together a week or so ago, and you still haven’t answered my question. Do you love him?”

Jordan leans his forehead against mine in an intimate gesture.

“Tyler has been one of my best friends for ten years. I love him. I have no clue why I’m telling you this, but I feel like I can trust you, Allie.”

“You can,” I whisper against his lips.

“I’ve known for a long time I love Tyler more than most people, but there’s something between us that isn’t quite right. We click in so many ways but not in others, and I can’t put my finger on the exact reason. I have issues that hold me back, but even with those, there’s just something else missing. That’s why I can’t be with him and why I don’t tell him I love him.”

“If you love him, Jordan, you should tell him.”

“He knows it, he feels it, and that’s enough. When I love someone and fall madly, deeply, over-the-top in love with the one, I think I’ll know.”

“Yeah?” My pulse races, and it’s taking all of my self-control not to kiss him.

“Yeah, and when I do, those words will leave my lips for only them. I don’t plan to fall in love more than once, so those words have to be reserved for that special person.”

“Jesus, Jordan” I’m pretty sure I just completely soaked through my panties.

“Allie, Ty and I aren’t seeing each other right now. Not until after the holidays, and maybe not even then.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not because then I wouldn’t be able to do this.”

Jordan covers my mouth with his, and I throw my arms around his neck. I open to him quickly, and when our tongues meet again, I want to drown in him. Everything about this is wrong. But as I feel his erection growing beneath me and I rock on top of him, I try not to care about all of the obstacles. He leans back and flicks open the button on my jeans.

“Jordan, wait, this is a really bad idea. You’re my boss, remember?”

“I remember.” He nips my lip with his teeth.

“You’re Sasha’s best friend …”

“She won’t mind.” He cups my ass, pulling me closer to him.

“Have you guys ever …”

“No, Allie. God, no. Sasha is like a sister to me. I’d never wreck that with sex.”

Which means I’m a short-term person in his life. That doesn’t sit well with me. “We barely know each other.”

He pauses, but only briefly.

“Okay, let’s get to know each other. Until we do, and we know we can work past the other issues, we won’t have sex.”

Hmm this could be interesting.

“Allie, I’m serious about getting to know you. But first, I want to know what you look like when you come. Let me finish you off. It won’t have to go any further.”

I bite my bottom lip and contemplate his proposition. Sasha’s advice about being true to myself echoes in my head. I want this.

“No sex?” I clarify.

His stormy eyes lock on mine. “Nope, just me getting you off.”

“What about work, Jordan? This job is important to me. I can’t afford to lose it or for things to be strange between us.” I’m so close to caving in.

“I can separate the two. Can you?”

No, probably not, but as he trails his fingers up and down my thighs, I want to try. It’s one night and things will go back to normal. “Okay.”

“Good.” He pulls me close and tugs my bottom lip between his teeth while he works my zipper down with his free hand. “You have phenomenal fucking lips. Has anyone ever told you that?”

“Uh, no.” The last word comes out as a squeal as he slides his hand into my pants and groans.

“I knew you’d be wet, but damn, Allie, you’re drenched. Do you know how hot that is? Stand up and take off your pants.”

I practically fly off his lap and kick off my shoes, followed by my jeans.

He rakes his gaze up my body, and when he licks his lips and pulls me close, I actually see his pupils dilate. No one has ever looked at me like this. Jordan makes me feel desired, and I wonder if it’s a skill he’s developed over time.

“Get back on my lap, Allie.”

Once I’m settled, Jordan wraps his arms around my waist, and I groan when I feel how hard he is beneath me. As I lean my head against his, he kisses me briefly before leaning down and kissing my neck. He nips, kisses, and sucks a wicked trail of desire until he reaches my mouth once again.

Jordan’s kiss starts off like a slow burn, and as he increases the intensity, he slides his hand into my panties. Fisting his hair, I cry out with need. He’s barely touched me and I already want more. He circles my pleasure point with one finger and slides another inside me.

“Oh God, Jordan.” My head falls back as my body arches into his.

“Fuck, Allie, you’re gorgeous. Look at me.” He cups the back of my head until our eyes are locked. As his fingers work their magic, he pulls me close when I cry out in pleasure. He traces the seam of my lips with his tongue and suddenly, he pulls his hand free from me, bringing his fingers to his lips.

He isn’t … he wouldn’t … oh my … he totally is.

Sliding a glistening finger into his mouth, he sucks my essence from it. The eroticism of the moment has completely taken control of me. I’m riding him through our clothes, trying to ease the ache of losing his touch.

J removes his fingers from his mouth and licks his lips as he slides his hand back where I need him most. “Come taste yourself, Allie Cat. You’re so fucking sweet.”

I lower my mouth to his as his fingers work their magic. I’m completely lost in his wonderland.

Jordan devours me with his mouth and consumes me with his fingers. I’m so close to the edge, I’m starting to see stars. Clenching his shoulders so tightly my knuckles turn white, I ride his hand.

“That’s it, Allie. Let me feel you explode.”

Jordan flicks my clit with his thumb, and that’s all it takes for me to detonate and scream his name. As I come down from my high, he holds me with his free hand. Our eyes meet again, and a rush of embarrassment washes over me. I can’t believe I just let my boss get me off. My flight reflex kicks in, and I scramble off of him and grab my pants from the floor. “Um … bathroom?”

He eyes me cautiously but inclines his head to the side, and I quickly dart off in that direction. After cleaning up, I look at myself in the mirror as I wash my hands. My face is flushed, and my heart races as if I’ve run a marathon. But I feel … alive. I’m also utterly and completely embarrassed.

As I walk back into the living room, Jordan is still sitting where I left him, a dazed expression on his face. At least I’m not the only one. I take a seat next to him so I can put my shoes back on, and he grabs my wrist.

“Allie, pause for a minute.”

Our eyes meet, and I feel the flush race to my cheeks again. “Jordan, I um, I … Well, I don’t normally do that.” My words come out in a rush and he smiles.

“Good, because that was something really fucking special.”

Does he mean that? I mean, he’s … him … and so experienced, and after what he just did to me, I’m second-guessing everything about sex right now.

“Are we going to be okay?” The words rush out of my mouth, and he looks at me like I’m losing my mind. Hell, maybe he has a reason to be concerned. I should try to clarify. “Like, at work and everything. Will it be okay? I don’t want to quit. I like my job. The bar is great and—”

“Whoa, Allie, take a breath. We’re okay. This can be a one-time thing if you want, or we can take things slow, get to know each other, and maybe decide if we’d like to eventually pursue something more. You’ve obviously got some personal shit going on, and I understand completely what that’s like. I’m going to leave the ball in your court for now.”

He’s going to leave it up to me? I’m basically a puddle of mush right now and he wants me to decide? “Oh, okay.”

“Remember my rule, Allie. No lies. If things get uncomfortable for whatever reason, let me know, but if you decide you want to see where this goes, don’t hesitate to speak up. I hope you do because that was my absolute pleasure.” He licks his luscious lips again as if trying to drive home his point. “If you ever want me to bail you out with Evan again, I’d be happy to.”

Evan …

“Ugh, don’t remind me. I gave that asshole six years of my life I can never reclaim, but I’ll be damned if I want to give him one more second of my time.”

“That’s a long time.”

“Not as long as you and Tyler,” I point out.

“Except Tyler and I haven’t been exclusive that long. A few months here and there over the years, maybe six or eight months max at one time.”

“Huh.”

J cocks a brow and his expression softens. “Would you date someone like me?”

“What do you mean? Is there something wrong with you?”

Jordan pours himself another shot of tequila and tosses it back before answering. “Some people won’t date a bisexual partner. It can … complicate things.”

I think about his question for a minute because I want to give him a well thought out answer. “The truth is, I’ve never had to think about it one way or the other. I’d probably have questions … but I can’t imagine it being something we couldn’t talk through. Who you’re attracted to doesn’t bother me. If you acted on that attraction while we were dating, I would have an issue. I’m not looking to be cheated on again.”

I stand up and reach for my keys and my phone. Fat Bastard rubs against my legs again, so I bend down and pet him goodbye. “Bye, pretty boy. Tell your daddy to be good to you.”

“I’m always good to him,” Jordan says as he walks me to the door. It’s a bit awkward, and I move backward, forgetting about the step up into the house. Jordan wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. “Careful, tiger, wouldn’t want you to get hurt.” His husky words ghost across my lips before he kisses me softly. “Evan was an idiot. Anyone who cheated on you would have to be. Goodnight, Allie.”

He releases me, and I give him a slight wave as I try to stay upright. “Goodnight, Jordan.”