It’s been almost a month since the night Allie let me get her off. After she left, I was a wreck. To help release some frustration, I got myself off in the shower before lying awake in bed. I’d taken two anti-anxiety pills before Rory drove me home from the beach house. I never should have mixed them with tequila. I know better.
I opened up to Allie in ways I’ve never opened up to anyone except Tyler. I’ve had my fair share of sexual partners and experiences. Owning a bar doesn’t exactly leave me lacking in the sex department. But Tyler is the only person I’ve ever felt a connection to until Allie. And what I felt for her was on a whole different level than how it is with Ty. I had no idea what to make of it. The next day, she acted like nothing happened, so I went with it. We’ve exchanged some light banter since then, but it’s probably for the best we let it go. Sasha said Allie had a couple of heated calls with her dad and her ex after my little stunt. Sasha also got me drunk to thank me for being the final straw to get Evan off Allie’s back. It was my pleasure. If anyone had talked to my sisters the way Evan talked to Allie, I would have killed them.
Today is our last day of work before the bar closes for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. As I enter the bar, Sasha and Allie are arguing as they do inventory before the bar opens.
“Sasha, it’s not that big of a deal. I’ve spent holidays alone before. I’ll be fine.”
“If it were any holiday other than this one, I’d be here, but I have to go, Al.”
This is the one time of year Sasha disappears due to something or someone family-related. She’s never told me where she goes, and I don’t pry, but she leaves Christmas Eve and shows back up sometime before New Year’s. I wonder if Allie knows where she goes.
I find myself speaking before thoroughly thinking it through. “You can come with me to my family’s house. They’d love to have you. The Westons have always been a ‘the more the merrier’ kind of crew.”
“That’s a great idea, Al. Jordan’s mom makes the best eggnog. I’ve had it at Thanksgiving there and it’s so good. Plus, who wouldn’t want to spend the holidays with a bunch of hot rock stars.”
I flash Sasha an evil glare. “Bitch.”
Sasha flashes me a sweet smile. “Hm, maybe, but I know you say it with love.” Sasha saunters toward me and throws her arms around my neck before kissing me on the cheek. “You know I love you most, J, even though I let your brother fuck my blues away.”
“Why do I put up with you?”
“Because you love me too.”
Allie smiles at us, and I lean back against the bar when Sasha releases me. “What do you say, Allie? Want to come meet the family?”
“How much family are we talking about?”
Her hesitancy makes me reluctant to tell her, but she needs to make an informed decision.
“My sister Rory, who will be home from college. My sister Diane, her husband Rob, and their daughters Saylor and Emme. Noah and Sawyer and their band mates Darren and Wyatt, plus Anna, Wyatt’s wife. Noah’s girlfriend Mel and her best friend Belle, who is some kind of entertainment blogger or writer. My parents and a variety of family from the guys in the band. Oh, and Warren, who is BAD’s manager but really like their fifth member, and his husband Sam. Mac and Ryan, who are their main bodyguards, will most likely be there too.”
“Wow … that’s a lot of people.” Now she looks like a scared kitten, but suddenly, I really want her to come with me.
“You should go, Allie. It will be a lot more fun than sitting home alone. They all spend the night and get drunk and then do Santa for the kids.” Sasha sounds wistful, but she always loves hearing the stories.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come too?” I ask, but she shakes her head.
“I’d love to someday, but I have to take care of business. Allie, go and enjoy it for both of us. I’d feel much better knowing you were together.”
Allie throws her arms up in surrender as we both turn to her. “Okay, I’d love to come. Thank you for inviting me, Jordan.”
“Anytime.”
Allie greets me with a smile when I pick her up the next day. I take her overnight bag and toss it in the back of my truck.
“Are you sure I don’t need to bring presents or anything? We should stop and at least grab a hostess gift.”
“Stop worrying. My mom would kill me if I let you bring anything. Besides, it’s at Sawyer and Noah’s beach house and they don’t want a hostess gift. Trust me.”
“It’s sweet that you’re so close with your family. Not a lot of people have that. You’re lucky, Jordan.”
She doesn’t know my history. It shouldn’t surprise me; Sasha is like a vault. At some point today, I’ll have to tell her since we’re going to be sharing a room, but not yet.
“Believe me, Allie, I know exactly how blessed I am. I’m sorry you couldn’t be with your dad this week.”
She snorts, and it’s pretty fucking cute. “I’m not. I’ve always been a pawn to him. Part of his political game. The senator’s daughter who was groomed to marry the man who would one day take his place when Dad leaves office. What a joke. Not only are our political beliefs on opposite sides of the spectrum but so are our ideas about family,” she says heatedly.
“How so?”
Allie huffs out a breath. “For him, it’s all about what value I can add to his campaign or his office. There was never time for skinned knees or broken hearts. When Evan cheated, he told me to get over it by doing the same and then get back to my engagement. My mom wasn’t like that. She loved me to pieces. That’s the kind of person I want to be, Jordan. One who values love over money and power.”
“Wow …” I’m not sure what to say.
“I’m okay, and with Sasha’s help, I’ll keep being okay. Enough about me. I am excited to spend time with your family. I’m not sure I’ve ever experienced a real loving holiday before.”
I take a quick glance at her as I drive. She’s smiling, and I know I’d do anything to keep that smile on her face. If that means backing off and staying in the boss zone, I will.
“You were really worried what happened that night would affect your job, weren’t you? I’m sorry if I pushed you past your comfort zone.”
Her mouth drops open as she quickly shakes her head. “Jordan, you didn’t push me at all. I wanted what happened as much as you did. Maybe I still do, I don’t know. I’ve caught you looking at me the past few weeks.” She practically whispers the last sentence.
“Well, Allie Cat, you’re hard not to look at. Besides, I’m not the only one who’s been looking.”
She blushes. “You’re hard not to pay attention to. You run the bar like a tight ship and don’t put up with any BS from customers or your employees. You’re an enigma, Jordan. Most of the time, you’re moody and sullen, but all of that disappears when you look at me.”
“Is that so?”
Allie covers her face and shakes her head. “God, I’m sorry. I must sound crazy. I’m just trying to figure you out.”
Huh, that’s different. I’m not sure anyone has ever admitted that to me. “I mean, if you want to stare at my sexy body all day, I’m not going to stop you. But the best way to get answers is to ask questions.”
She slips down in her seat with an even redder face. “You’re an ass.”
Allie makes me laugh, and maybe that’s part of why I like her. I spend so much time lost in my own head, laughing is something I don’t do often.
When I punch in the code at the gate to Sawyer and Noah’s, Allie’s brow rises subtly. She isn’t the only one with questions. I know she comes from a significantly wealthy family, but I’m not sure why she’s working in my bar for cash.
“This house is incredible.”
“Yeah, it’s my home away from home. This was their first big purchase once their career took off.”
As I park the truck, she takes off her seatbelt. “They’re twins, right? Who’s older, you or them?”
Guess I’m going to have to address some of this now. “Actually, we’re the same age. It’s a complicated story and one I don’t want to delve too far into right now. The Westons are actually my cousins. My aunt and uncle adopted me when I was seven. I probably should have explained this sooner. Sometimes during the holidays, people will say ‘cousin’ or ‘aunt and uncle’ instead of ‘brothers,’ ‘sisters,’ ‘mom,’ or ‘dad.’ It’s fine, we’re used to it. They’re not wrong. We just consider ourselves closer than that.”
She covers my hand with hers. “You don’t need to explain. Sasha is my sister in all the ways that count, I get it. But Jordan, if you ever want to talk, I’m a good listener.”
I flash her a smirk as I open my door. “I know, and you’re also a good screamer.”
She gasps in mock shock as I hop out of the truck. Deflection has always been the name of my game.
Normally, I let myself in, but I left my house key at home. The sound of pounding feet greets my ears when I ring the bell.
“Beat you, Uncle Sawyer!” Saylor yells excitedly as she flings open the door.
“Uncle Jordan! You’re here, finally!” I scoop my soon-to-be-five-year-old niece into my arms and ignore the grin spreading across Sawyer’s face as he takes in my guest.
“We’re here and ready for Santa!”
Saylor giggles. “You’re silly, Uncle J. Santa only comes for kids.”
“What? Say it isn’t so!”
Sawyer shrugs and plays along. “Sorry, man, it’s in the manual. Once you turn thirteen, Santa taps out. Too many kids and not enough elves.”
Saylor tugs on my shirt and points to Allie. “Who’s she?”
I’m such a jerk. I got so wrapped up in the moment, I forgot to introduce her. “Saylor, Sawyer, this is Allie. Allie is Sasha’s best friend and works at the bar now. She couldn’t go home for Christmas, so I thought we could share ours with her. What do you think?”
The expression on Sawyer’s face when I said she’s Sasha’s best friend is priceless. He looks like he swallowed a lemon. Good. Maybe he’ll stop fucking my bartender now. I put Saylor down and close the door behind us.
“Hi, Saylor, it’s nice to meet you.” Allie bends down and holds out her hand, but Saylor quickly hugs her.
“You too!” she says before darting off down the hall yelling. “Mommy! Uncle Jordan’s here and he brought a girlfriend!”
Allie’s eyes grow wide, and Sawyer snickers. “Welcome to the family, Allie.”
Asshole.
“Come on,” I say, taking her hand before quickly dropping it. She looks at me and smiles as if she understands I’m trying not to give my family the wrong impression. As we walk through the kitchen and into the living room, all eyes are on us. It makes me laugh that they’re all so curious.
“Everyone, this is Allie. She’s new to town and just started working at the bar. Allie, this is my family.”
Introductions are made, and Mom is beaming with happiness. She hugs Allie fiercely, and although Allie seems taken aback, she returns the hug. Sawyer, on the other hand, keeps eyeing us but his attention is eventually drawn to Amelia, Noah’s girl, and I already feel the undercurrent of a storm brewing between the three of them. The two of them always fall for the same girl—it never ends well.
The house begins filling quickly with more people and presents. Allie quietly takes it all in.
“Want some eggnog?”
She nods eagerly. “Yes, I think some alcohol could really help right now.”
Once we’ve got our drinks, we take a seat on the couch. Noah and Sawyer went to help unload cars, but I’d feel like a dick if I left Allie here alone with my sisters to swoop in on her like easy prey.
Thank God for Mel. She’s relatively new at these functions—Thanksgiving was her first time meeting the family. I think she’s taking pity on us as she gives all her attention to Allie.
“Have you known Jordan long?” As soon as the words are out of her mouth, my sisters zone in on us like radar on a target.
Allie flashes her a grateful smile. “Actually, I started working at the bar the week of the show. I’m sorry for what happened to you guys. I’m glad you’re both healing well.”
“It was scary, but we’re both perfectly fine now.”
With a slight nod, Allie keeps talking, “So Jordan says you’re a writer. Anything I might have read?”
Rory snickers, and Diane’s husband Rob tosses the couch pillow at her.
“She wrote The O Factor,” Diane tells Allie with a hint of pride in her voice. I didn’t realize Diane decided she liked Mel yet, but the way she’s beaming, I guess she has.
Allie shrieks and nearly sloshes her eggnog in my lap, “Get out! That was you? I loved that book!”
Noah and Sawyer are back and look like they’re suppressing their laughter. For once, they’re not the celebrities being fawned over, and I’m sure they’re happy about it.
Allie turns to me. “Jordan, you didn’t tell me she wrote The O Factor!”
“Like I knew what Noah’s girlfriend wrote? I just knew it was some kind of sex book so it wouldn’t be anything I’d probably ever read. Now you know.”
Allie rolls her eyes at me, and fuck if it doesn’t make me want to kiss her so they’re rolling back for an entirely different reason. I place my hand on her thigh, and she brushes her hand against it.
Mom smiles at us and begins her inquisition. Being affectionate with her is a bad idea in front of my family. “So, Allie, does your family live close?”
“No, it’s just me and my dad these days, but he lives in Washington D.C. and is working over the holidays. It’s the first Christmas I haven’t seen him, so Jordan took pity on me and brought me here. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Doesn’t look like pity to me.” Sawyer’s sarcasm is front and center tonight. Dad glares at him hard enough that he relents. “Just saying, they look cozy.”
Mom throws him a “watch it” look before answering Allie. “Of course, we don’t mind, the more the merrier. And don’t pay a lick of attention to Sawyer. You know these boys are brothers in every way it matters, and it shows. You’ll see in the morning … I think the three of them get more excited for presents than my granddaughters do.”
“Like Rory and Diane don’t get excited about gifts,” Noah says, defending our honor.
“I’m pretty sure it was you and Sawyer who pushed so hard Jordan fell down and broke his arm one Christmas morning when you were about thirteen,” Dad reminds him.
Allie and Mel bust up laughing. That was a hell of a Christmas, and even though I was in pain, I wouldn’t trade those memories.
“You didn’t, Noah!” Mel exclaims through her laughter.
“Oh, he did. They were so excited because they saw guitar-shaped silhouettes under the tree and it was all either of them had asked for the whole year. After that, we all piled into the car and spent the bulk of the morning in the emergency room.”
I fill them in on the rest. “Yup, and when we got home, Mom and Dad made Noah and Sawyer pass out all the gifts to everyone. As punishment, they had to wait to open theirs until the rest of us were done.”
“That doesn’t seem like too much punishment. My dad would have whooped my behind,” Allie replies.
Karen continues, “Oh, that wasn’t all. We didn’t let them have their guitars until Jordan said they could. But Jordan has a good heart and he loves his brothers. They had those guitars opened before bedtime.”
Someone is ringing the doorbell like crazy. While everyone is distracted at the commotion, I take the opportunity to show Allie to my room.
I take her hand, and she follows me down the hall past my brother’s office. “This is my room.” I flip on the light as we step inside.
“It’s huge.”
“That it is. I love coming here and opening the windows so I can listen to the waves crash against the shore. It’s got a great view, too, but it’s hard to see right now. Anyway, there’s a private bathroom right there,” I point over by the closet, “In case you don’t want to wait for one later as everyone drinks more. But this is where we’re sleeping—”
“We’re?” she chokes out.
“Well, I can sleep on the floor or down in the studio, but the house is full this weekend. Sawyer just assumed you’d be in here with me, but I don’t have to be. I don’t expect anything to happen between us even if we were.”
Allie sits on the edge of the bed and looks up at me. Her cheeks are a bit pink, and considering the loaded eggnog Mom gave us, I’m not surprised.
“Do you want to know something funny?”
“Sure, if you want to tell me something funny.” I take a seat next to her and wait.
“Mel’s book gave me the courage to leave Evan. Well, not exactly, but it opened my eyes. You really haven’t read it?”
That’s crazy. “No, and I probably never will. What about it made you decide to leave?”
She scoots up on my bed, leans on my pillows, and pats the spot next to her for me to join her. “Basically, the book is about a couple who sort of lost themselves in their relationship. They still love each other, but something is missing, and it becomes most apparent when they have sex. This probably sounds so silly to you.”
I’m enraptured by every fucking word coming out of her mouth. I want to know her story, and if I have to hear about Mel’s to get it, so be it. “Not at all. I asked to hear it, didn’t I?”
She nibbles her bottom lip and nods. “Okay, so there is a part in the book where she talks about complacency being a place where relationships go to die. Evan and I had been together since my sophomore year of college. We didn’t even have sex the entire first year we were together.”
“Wow.” I pause. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to blurt that out, but it seems odd to me.”
Her head bobs excitedly. “It was odd! He comes from old money so I just thought it was a family thing with him. There was something about him though. He was endearing, and sweet. Things were good, and when we finally had sex, it was … nice.”
I let out a snort, and she glares at me. “I’m sorry, Allie. I’m not trying to make fun, but sex shouldn’t be classified as nice.”
She hops out of bed and holds out her hand to me. “You know what? I’m not drunk enough to have this conversation with you. Let’s go have some more of your mom’s loaded nog and we can pick this up later.”
“Come on Al, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I know, but even though I want to talk to you about this, I need liquid courage because Evan is a touchy subject. You can sleep with me tonight, Jordan. In the bed, I mean. It’s huge, and I trust you.”
“You do, huh?” As I get to my feet, she grabs my shirt pulling me to her.
“Yup, but maybe you shouldn’t trust me.” Her lips meet mine, and she dips her tongue into my mouth before pulling back too quickly for my liking.
“Fuck, Allie.”
Her eyes sparkle as they meet mine. “I just had to know.”
Why is she speaking in code? “Know what?”
“If the spark I felt the first night would still be there.”
Now that should freak me out, but it doesn’t at all. “And is it?”
She closes her eyes and nods. They flutter open slowly, and her beautiful blue eyes lock on mine. “I’m not sure it ever left.”
The rest of the night passed in a blur. I couldn’t get her last comment out of my mind—or that kiss. Even when Tyler texted me “Merry Christmas,” I only replied with a similar greeting instead of engaging him in conversation like usual.
By the time we went to bed, the two of us were both pretty well lit, along with all of my siblings. The kids were asleep, and Santa’s sleigh had delivered the goods before we all went our separate ways.
“Your nieces are going to be so excited when they wake up in the morning,” Allie says while digging through her bag.
“They sure will be—”
“Why did you stop talking?” Allie turns toward me, and my cock twitches. She’s in her bra and in the process of kicking off her pants.
“You’re practically naked. Why would I want to talk when I can watch?”
She shrugs and smiles. It’s a beautiful sight. “Well, you’ve pretty much seen it all, so I figured why be modest?”
I take a step toward her, and she holds out her hand. “Not so fast. You and I need to talk, and I can’t do that half naked.”
“Really? I do some of my best talking fully naked.”
Allie laughs as she puts on an oversized shirt and a pair of yoga pants. “Somehow, I don’t doubt that.”
I strip down to my boxers, and she looks at me expectantly. “What?”
“Where are your pajamas?”
I laugh. “You’re looking at them.”
“You can’t be serious!” She motions at me with her hands. “How am I supposed to keep away from all of … that … if you’re not wearing any clothes?”
She’s adorable. “The same way you do when I am? I promise I won’t touch you, unless you want me to.”
I get into bed and under the covers to prove my point, and as she slides in next to me, I turn off the light.
“That’s the problem. I always want you to,” she grumbles.
“Come again?”
She huffs and flips onto her side, facing me. The room is dark, but the moonlight casts enough of a soft glow for me to see her. “That’s what I was trying to say earlier. When I was with Evan, I thought things were great until he started cheating on me. The last year and a half we were together, we never even had sex. I don’t know why I stayed with him, but complacency, like Mel said in her book, was the closest thing I could come up with to describe it.”
“So you left.”
“After some careful planning, yes. And the sex … I didn’t realize it was nice, not until you. Like, how did I spend so many years of my life with him and not understand our sex life was lacking? Not only was the O factor missing but the wow factor was too!”
She’s uninhibited due to the alcohol. I could listen to her all night and not get bored. “The O Factor?”
“Yeah, that’s what Mel calls the loss of orgasms in her book, The O Factor.”
Wait … what? “Allie, are you telling me he stopped giving you orgasms?”
“This is so embarrassing.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re you. All manly and six-packed and tattooed and fucking gorgeous. You’ve got women and men practically falling at your feet. Your cousins and best friends are famous, and you probably have more sex than anyone I’ve ever met. Your orgasm cup probably runs so far over that I could slip and fall just standing next to you.”
She’s drunk and rambling and all I want to do if kiss the hell out of her. “Allie, please answer my question because your drunk speak is adorably cute and making my dick harder than a rock.”
She gasps and leans forward as if she wants to see. “That’s so hot. See what I mean? You’re insanely experienced, and I just left a guy I was with for six years who never gave me an O.”
Holy shit.
My lips crash down onto hers, and she throws her leg over my hip. Our tongues meet, and her soft whimpers fuel my desire for her. She should know how much she’s desired and one idiot boyfriend won’t define how sexual she can be.
Reluctantly, I pull away from her. I promised her nothing would happen, and she’s not sober. “Allie, you deserve so much better than someone who won’t take care of your needs, all of your needs. As much of a pleasure it would be to get you off … and I do mean my pleasure … you also deserve someone who will keep his promises to you. I promised nothing would happen tonight. I meant it.”
She sighs. “I’m a turn-off to you now, aren’t I?”
I take her hand and place it on my cock to prove one final point. “Does that feel like someone who is turned off by you?”
“No,” she whispers.
“Exactly. What do you want, Allie? Are you looking for a relationship? A fuck buddy? A friend? Honestly, most of my encounters, with the exception of Ty and now you, are random.”
“Why me?”
“I’ll let you know when I figure it out. Now, answer the question.”
She flips onto her back and faces the ceiling. “I told myself when I moved here that I would give it at least six months before I jumped into any kind of dating or sex. A month of reflection for each year I spent with that asshole. Time to get to know myself and trust I’ll never put myself in that kind of situation again.”
“So you want a six-month reprieve. I think that’s understandable.”
“But then I met you and nothing has been the same since. You’re my boss and Sasha’s best friend, and you have this long-term, off-and-on boyfriend who is such a nice guy. I don’t want to come between any of that. I don’t want to move again or lose my job. I just want to live in my happy bubble with Sasha.”
I pull her to her side and brush the hair out of her face. “Figure yourself out first, Allie. You are the most important thing in this equation. The rest will be there when you’ve got it all figured out. We’ll all still be here.”
“You’re too hot to still be single by then,” she whines.
I chuckle—it’s the alcohol talking. I see it all the time in the bar.
“First of all, there’s no such thing as too hot to be single. I’ve been single for twenty-eight years, and I don’t anticipate that changing. If it does, it wasn’t meant to be. Ty and I have shit to figure out. Maybe your six-month window is exactly what I need to work things out with him one way or the other. We’ve been going back and forth for far too long, and it’s not fair to either of us.”
She wraps her arms around me and snuggles close. “You’re right. Taking six months for myself is the best thing. We’ll still be friends, right?”
“Yup.
Allie yawns. “If you and Tyler work things out, I’ll be happy for you, Jordan. I promise.”
I kiss the top of her head. “Thank you.”
“Do you know what would make me happy though?”
“Allie, I don’t have a clue, but I think you should tell me.”
“Fat Bastard. Can I come over and hang out with him? Especially on the nights when you and Sasha close? I wouldn’t be so lonely.”
She wants to come hang out with my mean-ass cat? “You can come hang with FB anytime you’d like.”
“Thanks, Jordan.”
“Merry Christmas, Allie.”
“Merry Christmas, J.”