I ran to the bathroom and cussed myself for leaving her hanging. I wanted to rip her clothes off and take her against the wall right there, but I said I’d never force a woman to sleep with me, and I meant it. She would sleep with me before she left that room. I was even more confident after that.

I slammed the bathroom door and unfastened my pants. My dick was screaming for attention. What I wouldn’t have given to shove her down to her knees and have her suck me off right there. I couldn’t trust her to not hurt me or I may have done just that.

I wrapped my hand around my cock and moaned. I needed to fuck her soon. I tilted my head back and looked at the ceiling as I moved my hand faster. The wetness from her pussy, still on my fingers, only encouraged my orgasm. The hand jobs I gave myself weren’t going to be enough soon.

“Oh, fuck me,” I grunted as the first wave hit. I’d have another mess to clean up, but I didn’t care if I painted the walls with it. I wasn’t stopping until every last drop had come out, and I was fully satisfied—as satisfied as I could be with my imagination and her wetness coating my fingers. I shuddered as the last of my climax pulsed through me.

I took time to just breathe before cleaning up. It was time I didn’t have but had to take. I grabbed the box of condoms out of the cabinet and slipped a couple of packages into my pocket. It may have been wishful thinking, but I was going to be prepared. I wanted to find someone to take some of my energy out on and give my palm a break.

I was going to the bar to see Bryce again. Ted told me when I carried Bryce out of the bar that I was welcome to come back any time to collect my new friend. It seemed Bryce found a new place to spend his time, and Ted was tired of babysitting him.

That was one thing I never understood about bartenders. They’d take your money and make you crazy drunk, but they never wanted to deal with the mess alcohol created. They couldn’t have it both ways. Make the money and babysit or make a little less and have less of a headache. The money always won.

Bryce’s car wasn’t in the parking lot yet, and I contemplated driving on to his house, but I decided it was better if I showed up first instead. It was earlier than the previous night, so he still had time to show. I’d give him a little while before I went looking for him.

I walked in and looked around. Just because the car wasn’t there didn’t mean he wasn’t. Maybe he thought he had driven home the last time and it scared him enough to take a cab to and from the bar. Or maybe it scared him enough to stop drinking. I hoped it wasn’t that. At least not until I was finished with him.

I saw a couple of ladies at a corner table and turned to walk toward them. Ted stopped me and yelled from the bar, “Hey, do you think you can just come hang out here?”

I smiled at the ladies and walked toward the bar. “You said I could pick up my new friend any time.”

He looked around and placed his hands on the bar. “Well, I don’t see him around, do you?”

“All of this hostility is not good for you. I’ve paid for the damages. I’ve apologized for how I’ve handled myself here before. I believe I’ve paid my dues to become a regular member of society again.”

“Yeah, that was until I saw you bugging other customers.”

I looked at the ladies again and smiled when I saw them watching me. “Well, it doesn’t look like I’m bothering them at all.” I looked at Ted. “So, about my friend, when does he usually come in?”

“If he was your friend, you’d know that.”

I sighed and took my wallet out to get a business card. “I want to be his friend. It looks like he could use one. Do you want him to get as bad as I got?” I handed him the card.

“Went full circle, huh?” He scoffed. “Is this supposed to impress me?”

“Look, I don’t care if you’re impressed or not, but for some reason, this asshole is choosing your bar to numb his feelings in. When I see someone headed down the same path I went, I have to step in. I can’t let him hit rock bottom alone.

“Now, I don’t have any idea what his story is, but something happened to make him want to drink, and from what he said last night, she’s a bitch. He needs to know there are other women out there, and not all of them will tear him to shreds.” I motioned to the girls in the corner. “All you’re doing is numbing the pain. I’m trying to get him to move on.”

Ted looked at my card, the girls in the corner, and me a few times as if he were trying to find something wrong with what I said. He couldn’t. We’ve all had our hearts stomped on and felt that pain. He knew drinking into oblivion wasn’t the answer. Pussy wasn’t either, but it sure felt better than waking with a hangover.

He nodded and walked away. I walked toward the girls again. “Well, good evening. How are you wonderful ladies tonight?”

The blonde who’d looked at my crotch more than my eyes answered, “We’re getting bored and thinking of moving to a different bar.”

“I hope you stay. I’m waiting to see if a friend will show, and I’d love to introduce you to him.”

The brunette wasn’t as confident as the blonde, but she was trying. “Is he as hot as you?”

I smiled and turned to the sound of the door opening. “Well, take a look for yourself.” I motioned to Bryce who’d come in and looked around before heading straight for the bar.

“He’s cute.” The brunette approved. The blonde kept her eyes on me.

“If you’ll excuse me for a moment, I’m going to get my friend and bring a couple of drinks back with us. Would that get you to stick around?”

“Maybe for a few minutes.”

I smiled at the blonde and was grateful I’d come to the bar prepared. There was no way I was missing out on those long legs wrapped around me.

I walked over to Bryce and slapped him on the back. “I’m glad to see you made it through the night.”

He had my card in his hand and was turning it over. “I wondered if you’d be here tonight. Thank you for not stealing my stuff.”

I narrowed my eyes and shook my head. “That’s kind of an odd thing to thank someone for.”

“I would’ve gotten home without your help.”

“Yes, that’s very possible. I’m not sure what condition you would’ve been in, but you could’ve gotten home.”

“Are you on his payroll, too?”

I didn’t have an answer for that one, but I knew I had to come up with one soon. “Ted? No, I think he prefers I stay out of this bar.”

He looked at me for the first time. “Not Ted. You know who I’m talking about.”

I shook my head. “I really don’t. Your boss? Your rich daddy? Who?”

“Not my rich daddy.” He kicked back the drink Ted set in front of him without hesitation.

“Hey, why don’t we slow it down tonight and take a different approach to forgetting our problems?”

He flicked my card with his fingers. “Yeah, you’re the sober whisperer. I don’t feel like being sober.”

“How about fresh pussy? Do you feel like that?” I turned him to the girls in the corner. It was cute when the brunette blushed and looked away. I wasn’t looking for cute. I was looking for the blonde who licked her lips when I made eye contact. “Come on. You said your girl left you, so I know you’re not getting any action. Bury your problems in the brunette. I’ve got dibs on the blonde.” I signaled to Ted that I wanted two drinks for their table.

“You can take them both.”

“Don’t make me cup you in public to see if your junk is still attached. She didn’t take your balls, too.”

“You’re an asshole.”

Ted set the drinks down and laughed. “I knew I liked you, kid.”

“I may be an asshole, but I’m right.” I flicked my card he was still holding. “I know drinking isn’t the way.” I took out one of the condoms I brought and slapped it into his hand. “Let’s go.”

He looked at the condom, and when he realized what it was, he turned to me in a panic. “I’m not having sex with them.” He tried to hand it back, but I picked up the drinks.

“Just hang on to it. I’m not saying you have to have sex, but you have to be prepared. I’m just saying we should take these lovely ladies a drink and talk to them. What happens next is up to you.”

* * *

I kept my head down as I led Brody and the women he picked up at the bar to my front door. To Laney’s front door. What was I doing? I didn’t drink or pick up women. Brody was right, though. I had to get over her.

Everything pointed to her leaving. The photos. The plane ticket her father bought. Everything. She didn’t seem to be the type to just run away, but I was her first everything. There was that word again.

I shook my head as I opened the door. I didn’t have everything anymore. I had nothing. I felt like nothing. That wasn’t true. I felt lower than nothing. I felt like shit.

Brody and the blonde moved to the oversized chair without any invitation. As soon as the door was opened, they walked in and made out as if the brunette and I weren’t standing in the doorway. I was grateful he took the aggressive one. I couldn’t handle watching it happen to him, so I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle her all over me.

I looked at the woman standing next to me and back to Brody. I didn’t know where to look. I looked to the empty sofa and turned back to the brunette. “Did you want to have a seat?”

“Thanks.”

She walked past me and almost ducked as she walked by as if she was unsure what to do herself. She seemed to want to be invisible, as well. At least we had that in common. I wanted to go upstairs, but I didn’t trust them to be in my home without supervision. I narrowed my eyes as I sat next to the brunette on the sofa and noticed Brody’s hand was up the blonde’s shirt. It didn’t seem they cared if there was an audience.

I looked to the woman sitting next to me and tried to smile, but neither one of us could pull it off when she tried to smile back. “This is kind of awkward.”

She had a genuine but shy smile that time. “It kind of is. You’d think I’d be used to Stacey by now, but it’s still kind of awkward.”

“Stacey? I’m sorry. I’m sure I was told your name.”

“Dana.” She held out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Bryce.”

I shook her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Dana.”

She kept my hand and held it on her lap. I let her hold it for a little while, but I couldn’t handle the contact. She wasn’t Laney. She didn’t feel like Laney. She felt wrong.

Brody finally came up for air and noticed when I took my hand back from Dana. “Okay, Bryce, let’s go get some more refreshments.”

Stacey pouted and wrapped her arms around Brody. “The only refreshment I need is in your pants, and it better be as big as the rest of you.”

He smirked and I wanted to throw up. “You’ll find out soon enough, but I need to take care of something first.” Brody stood and placed her into the chair. “Bryce.”

I sighed but got up. “I need to talk to you anyway.” I started to walk to the kitchen, but Brody stepped in front of me and walked straight to it. “How the hell do you know so much about my place?”

“Because I searched for the mop to clean up your puke in the entryway last night. You’re welcome for that, too.”

I dropped my shoulders and hung my head. “This is not me. I don’t drink like this. I don’t bring random women home. None of this is me.”

He put his hand on my shoulder. “Look, I don’t think it’s you, either, but this girl who left you has really done a number on you. You’ve got to forget about her, and if that means spending one night in bed with someone you normally wouldn’t, then so be it.” He squeezed my shoulder. “You’ve got to move past it and stop hoping that she’ll come back.”

I shut my eyes really tight and shook my head. “She isn’t coming back.”

He let go and took a step back. “What do you mean?”

I opened the freezer door and took out the envelope with her beach photo. “I hired someone to find Laney. I hired her to get the real answers that her father wasn’t giving me. He would never let her go on vacation by herself even if it was to plan our wedding. Something is not right about this. I feel it.” I pounded my chest. “I feel it.”

“So, what’s that?” Brody pointed to the envelope.

“It’s my hell.” I opened the envelope and took out the photo of Laney on a beach. “I’ve been back and forth if she left on her own or not. There’s just one thing wrong with everyone’s theory on this. She loves me. She loves me!

“Her dad was supposed to pay for our wedding as a way to apologize for shit he’s put her through. He claims he told her that he was surprising her for the wedding, and he sent her there first to get things straightened out how she wanted them. After all, I had to work. I couldn’t just take off, but she could close her shop for the wedding. Her customers would understand that.”

“The person you hired couldn’t tell you where she was?”

“She wouldn’t. I’m sure Laney’s dad paid her not to.” I took my phone out of my pocket and swiped the screen. “I’m not sure it even matters.” I held out my phone to show him the latest proof the private detective sent me. Laney was kissing another man. “It’s all a bunch of lies. He thought he would buy more time if he told me he was setting up our wedding. Now they expect me to believe she’s flat out left me? I won’t. I can’t.”

Brody narrowed his eyes at the photo on my phone. “Why didn’t you get a print of this one?”

I scoffed. “She said she was trying to save me from more heartache. I kept calling her and asking her if she found out the truth yet. I thought if she was paid off by Laney’s dad that she’d be a decent human and feel guilty for lying to me. I guess I was wrong.”

“This is all the more reason to get out there and forget about her.”

I shook my head and tried to stop my chin from quivering. The last thing I wanted to do was cry in front of Brody. I’d been strong for so long, but the cards were stacked against me and every turn said she left me. “I can’t. I love her too much.”

“There’s one problem with your theory.”

I looked up at him. “What’s that?”

“Why isn’t she calling you?”

I brought my palms up to my forehead. “We briefly talked about getting married on a tropical island that had no communication with the outside world.” I lowered my hands and looked at him. “I wanted a honeymoon that her dad couldn’t interrupt. If I hadn’t made that suggestion, maybe she’d still be here.”

“No, Bryce. You’ve got to see this for what it is.” He set my phone onto the counter and gripped both of my shoulders. “She left you, man. I don’t know if she’s in love with this other guy, but she’s clearly having fun with him and not you. This is the time to make that decision to move on or live in the past.”

“It’s too soon.”

He shook me a little. “Jesus, I didn’t know you were such a pussy.”

I hit his hands off my shoulders and squared them to stand up to him. The top of my head went up to his chin, but I wasn’t afraid of Brody.

“I’m not a fucking pussy, but I’m not a goddamn robot, either.”

He picked up my phone and shoved it in my face. “Look at the photo of her kissing that asshole all night if you want. Take out your cock and pretend it’s you in that photo.” He leaned down and got into my face. “But if you for one second think she’s thinking about you when she’s riding that dick, you’re a bigger fool than I thought you were.”

My nostrils flared as I heard him talking about Laney having sex with someone else as if he knew the type of person she was, and I clenched my jaw. “She wouldn’t do that.”

“Want to look at the picture again? She is doing that. She isn’t playing tonsil hockey and sending him on his way with a pat on the ass.” Brody tossed my phone onto the counter again. “Fine, you say she isn’t doing that. You know her better than me, obviously. Tell me. What was your sex life like? How often did you fuck? Judging by the pleasure chest I found in the nightstand when I was looking for aspirin, I’d say you had a healthy sex life and she was just as much into it as you were.

“Your girl left you. What’s to believe? She isn’t here with you, is she?” He looked around me. “No, she’s off doing God knows what to—”

“Stop.”

“Come on, man. You could’ve had your pick of any woman at the bar. More than just the two young twats we brought home were looking your way.”

“They aren’t Laney.”

“No, and fucking good thing. What the hell is it with this girl? Why put yourself through this much torture for someone who fucked you over more than once? What about her rich daddy you were bitching about earlier? Why put up with him?”

I looked at his chest and wondered what it was like to live with a void there before looking up and meeting his eyes. “I feel sorry for you.”

“For me? I’m living the life, getting as much pussy as I want. I’m not sitting here being a pussy over some girl.”

“You’ve never felt love, have you?” I stood up straighter. “When you finally fall for someone, you’ll get it. When you finally take that leap and allow those feelings to move up past your waist and what they can do to your dick, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.

“I would do anything for her. Even if that means letting her go. All she has to do is ask, but she hasn’t asked me. Until I hear it from her lips, I won’t let her go. No matter how big and bad you think you are, once someone gets inside your heart like Laney’s gotten into mine, you won’t rest until she’s happy no matter what it does to you.”

Brody walked to the doorway of the kitchen and turned to me. “You can stay in here and look at your photos, dreaming about something that will never happen again, or you can come out there with me and fuck that eager pussy that’s probably dripping for you right now. I don’t give a fuck what you do, but if you don’t take yours, I’ll take them both.”

He left me alone in the kitchen, and I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t want to be there, but I had nowhere else to go. I needed to get them out of my house. I just wasn’t sure how I was going to do that when he had the temper he had. I didn’t want trouble. I just wanted peace and quiet.

I had a million theories for why she left, why she hadn’t contacted me, and why she didn’t said goodbye. None of them made sense. None of them were good enough. I loved her with everything I had, and I would find her.

It was getting harder to keep hope when Ryan said he couldn’t find anything out about her disappearance. If he were blind to the people involved, he would agree with the police that she left on her own.

The only thing that made sense was her father conjured up more false proofs about me that sent her running. She didn’t run away from me the last time. She ran to me and asked if it was true. I had no reason to believe she wouldn’t have come to me again.

I walked back into the living room to see the two girls kissing each other. I stopped walking. I hadn’t had any sexual desire since Laney left, but seeing the two women kiss in my living room reminded me I was still a man.

Brody approved even though he tried to sound as if it hadn’t affected him. “You started the party without me.”

Stacey smiled and walked away from her friend. She walked past Brody and grabbed my hand. I was too shocked from watching them make out to stop her. “It sounds like you had a bad breakup. I’ve settled her nerves for you. She’s all yours.” She took me to Dana and waited until I sat next to her. “She’ll take really good care of you. Her heart was just broken, too.”

I looked at Dana. “It was?” I reached out and held her hand. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”

I looked forward and watched as Stacey got on her knees in front of Brody. I looked back to Dana. I didn’t want to watch what was going to happen just a few feet from me. I didn’t feel well and knew it had nothing to do with the alcohol I drank earlier. In fact, I wished I had more to drink and forgot about the sounds I was listening to as she unzipped his pants and sucked him off.

Dana had no trouble watching them and licked her lips before she turned to me. “That looks fun.”

I swallowed as she moved to my lap and put her arm around me. I looked at Brody to signal to him I needed help, but it appeared he was taking photos or maybe video of the blowjob he was getting. I couldn’t believe what my life had become.

“Am I doing something wrong?”

“No, please don’t take this personally.” I removed her from my lap and got up. “I’m sorry. I love Laney. I can’t do this.” I looked at Brody, and my lip curled in disgust. “I want you out of my house and out of my life. I don’t give a shit if you think I’m a pussy. Get out!”

“I will break you in two if I leave this house with this erection.” He groaned and tilted his head back as Stacey sucked harder. He held his hand out to me, and at first I thought he was asking me to join him. I was relieved when he spoke. “Give me my condom back. I’m going to need both.”

I threw it and hit Brody in the face with it. “Fuck your whores and get the hell out.” I took a step closer. “And don’t come back again.”

As I turned to head up the stairs, I caught a glimpse of Dana sitting on the sofa, stunned. I shouldn’t have called her a whore. I knew nothing about her. She was nothing but nice to me. Her friend was definitely a whore. She and Brody deserved each other. I slammed my bedroom door and locked it.