Chapter Eighteen
GRAYSON WAS WORKING at Grunter’s on the railings for Parker’s house two days later, still thinking about what she’d said Sunday morning. Isn’t it too soon to talk about this? We aren’t even talking about what’s real, like where we both live. He’d been the one to say they should take things as they came, and now he regretted ever saying it. Even though she hadn’t confessed her love for him, he knew she loved him. Knew it with the same confidence he knew he loved her. Maybe it was time to get it all out on the table and deal with what they’d been trying to avoid.
He gripped the metal tongs and held a piece of metal over the brick forge, trying to lose himself in the sounds of the blowers, the heat thrown by the brick hearth, the scent of smoldering metal. But the things that normally calmed him weren’t even scratching the surface. His gut churned with the need to clear the air with Parker.
Hunter came into the workshop with a big grin on his face as he texted, which told Grayson he was texting Jana. The two of them texted often, or rather, sexted, which Hunter loved to gloat about.
Hunter shoved his phone in his pocket. “Hey, bro. You look about ready to explode.”
“I’m good,” Grayson lied.
“Uh-huh.” Hunter began sifting through a stack of iron rods. “How’s the railing coming along?”
“Good. Couple more weeks.” He shouldn’t take out his bad mood on his brother, but he’d done him a favor by taking on the travel for their contract with CCF, and he wished there were someone in line to do the same for him. Only he didn’t really wish he could move out to California. He just hated the idea of being away from Parker.
Last night, after they took a walk around the pond with Christmas, Parker had spent an hour on the phone with her agent. Grayson was looking forward to spending time with her in her world and sharing that part of her life, despite his distaste for the celebrity lifestyle. They had planned on traveling back to LA when he was done with the railing, but after her phone call she’d told him she had to leave next week to attend meetings for the role she hoped to get in the new film, and reality came rushing in. He had to stay here and get this railing done if he was ever going to get back to finishing the work for CCF. The designs for the last two sites, Texas and Georgia, loomed. The sooner he completed the work, the more settled he’d feel, making it easier to deal with their schedules and living arrangements.
He carried the red-hot metal to an anvil and picked up a hammer, thinking about what his future with Parker really looked like. Eventually Parker would be filming on location, even if she didn’t get this role. Very soon their lives were going to be even farther apart.
Grayson focused on hammering the metal, forming it into the image he’d created in his mind. If only life were that easy.
“You wanna fess up about whatever’s got your briefs in a knot?” Hunter asked. “Or are we going to pretend you’re not chewing nails?”
He stopped the hammer midswing and met Hunter’s gaze. “It’s nothing anyone can fix.”
“Try me.” Hunter leaned against the drawing table and crossed his ankles, casual and cocky as could be. Probably where Grayson had learned it.
“Okay, sure.” Why not? Grayson clearly didn’t have the answer. Maybe Hunter would. “I want to be with Parker. Her life is in LA, and traveling to film on location all over the world. Except for the travel for the foundation, my life is here. I can’t see a way to make those two things come together.”
Hunter shrugged. “Why not?”
“What do you mean why not? She lives across the country. It’s not a weekend drive.”
“And…?”
Grayson clenched his teeth against the urge to throttle his brother. “And I’ve got to work. She’s got to work. What should we do? See each other once every few weeks?”
“No. You’d never last.”
“No kidding.” Grayson went back to pounding the metal.
“Have you talked to her about it?”
Grayson shook his head. “Can’t. There’s no answer, so what good would it do?”
“I don’t know. Maybe she’ll have an answer.”
He set the hammer down and moved the metal aside so he could pace. “She’s been through so much already. The last thing she needs is to think I have any expectations of her changing her life for me. I’m the man. I need to make the sacrifice if I want to be with her, but, man, do I hate it out there. Something about that area rubs me the wrong way.”
His cell phone vibrated, and Parker’s name flashed on the screen. He opened and read the text. Christmas misses you. But I don’t. Nope. Not at all. And I didn’t spray your cologne on my wrist so I could smell it all day, either. It attacked ME.
He read it again, consumed by the intensity of his love for her and wondering how he’d manage to be away from her for a day, much less a few weeks.
He lifted his eyes to his brother. “I love her. She’s it for me, Hunt. I think about her day and night. I want to give her everything she’s ever wanted—family, stability, kids. Whatever it takes to fill her heart so full she never longs for a single thing. I really believed we could take this day by day and the answers would come, but I’m so lost in her, I can’t even think rationally enough to figure it out.”
“You know what Pop would say?” Hunter said. “Levelheaded decisions have no place where women are concerned.”
“So, what are you saying? I’m overthinking this?”
“What would you tell me if I came to you with this dilemma?”
“To figure it out and make it work.” Grayson paced again. “Maybe I am overthinking, which is exactly what I told Parker not to do. But still, there’s no clear answer.”
“The answers are never clear. You know that, Gray. After we lost Mom, all of us reacted differently. The answers, the way we got through it, were also different. Look at Matt. He still hasn’t really dealt with it. There’s a reason he’s never here.” Hunter knelt by the iron rods again and began picking through them. “You never know what’ll come up, so just deal with it the best way you know how as it comes.” He lifted his eyes to Grayson. “Aren’t you the one who taught me that?”
“Probably. I’m wicked smart.” He smirked.
Hunter shook his head. “Apparently wicked dumb, too, if you need me to remind you of your own advice.” He held up two different-length rods. “Help me get this under control, will ya?”
Grayson crouched beside him. “What are we looking for?”
“I saw your drawings of a gazebo with Parker’s name on it. I’m assuming we need supplies if you’re building her one. I thought I’d get started on the ordering, seeing as you’re too busy being lovesick to think straight.”
Grayson had sketched the gazebo for her yard. Now it looked like she might need two—one for Wellfleet and one for Los Angeles.
PARKER AND SKY talked while Christmas played along the pond’s edge, hurling himself at birds and barking when they flew away. Sky had surprised Parker that morning when she’d dropped by to give her a framed copy of the Us Weekly kiss, and they’d ended up spending the day together. They’d gone shopping, and Parker had found a cute pair of pink panties that said Taken across the front, which she’d changed into to surprise Grayson later. After having lunch at a café, they’d gone back to Grayson’s cottage, and they’d been sitting on the dock chatting ever since.
Parker told Sky about what happened with Abe and how wonderful Grayson was through the whole thing. Sky told her about how depressed she’d been after she’d lost her mother.
“If Pete hadn’t come to stay with me, I’m not sure how long it would have taken for me to come up for air,” Sky said.
“I think Grayson did for me what Pete did for you,” Parker confided. “I don’t think I realized it at the time, but during all those months we were emailing, he’d become as important to me as Bert was. And after I lost Bert, I cut myself off from everyone—including him. And then, there he was, in the middle of my sugar-infused, tequila-laced nightmare. Like a knight in shining armor.” He’d become such a big part of her life. Regardless of what she was doing—studying the script, talking to her agent, discussing press with Luce, or hanging out with Sky and the girls—she felt like Grayson was right there with her.
At the sound of tires on gravel, Christmas took off for the cottage to greet one of his favorite humans. Parker’s heartbeat quickened. It always did when Grayson was around. He knelt to love up Christmas and waved to them.
“Speak of the devil.” Sky waved as she pushed to her feet. “He wasn’t your knight in shining armor, because you didn’t need to be rescued.” Her colorful skirt swished around her legs as they headed up to greet Grayson. She lowered her voice as Grayson approached with his four-legged buddy trotting happily beside him and a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hand. “You needed to be loved so you could heal, and he was ready.”
Before Parker could ask what she meant, Grayson closed the remaining distance between them and slipped an arm around her waist, kissing her softly and handing her the pretty bouquet.
“Hey, sweetheart.”
“They’re so beautiful. Thank you.”
“Told you he was ready,” Sky said with a knowing smile.
“Ready for?” Grayson gave her a quizzical look.
“Oh, nothing.” Sky pointed at them. “I love seeing you two like this. It’s as if the universe knew exactly when to swoop in and bring you together.”
“Because you believe nothing happens by coincidence,” Grayson said as they headed for the cottage.
“You should listen to me. I know what I’m talking about.” Sky hugged Parker and Grayson and petted Christmas. “I’ll see you guys later. I’ve got a date with my fiancé.” She walked backward toward her car and called out, “We’re wedding planning!”
“About time,” Grayson called, then to Parker, “Hey, be my date for the wedding?”
“You don’t even know when it is,” she said as he held the door open for her.
“It doesn’t matter when. I know we’ll be together.”
Her mind skidded with the realization that she knew it, too. They’d been staying at his place for only a few days, but it already felt like home. She didn’t miss her lonely house on the bay one bit. The railing Grayson was making would make it feel homier, which would be wonderful for the kids visiting through the foundation. But she knew it would never feel like home to her the way his cottage did. How could it, when the man she loved had built his life here, taking every day as it came?
They went inside, and Christmas plopped down in front of the fireplace. Grayson grabbed a vase from the floor by the hearth and filled it with water. “Sweetheart, the wedding? Would you rather I ask someone else?”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I want. Some other woman’s hands on you.” She pushed between him and the sink. “You better not.”
“Never.” He pressed his lips to hers.
“Not even when we’re apart for long spans of time? You’re a guy. You have needs.”
He lifted her in his arms, and her legs wound around his waist. “The only woman allowed to satisfy my needs is right here in my arms.” His brows knitted. “What about you?”
“I don’t need a woman to satisfy my needs, but thanks for asking.”
He nipped at her lower lip, making her laugh.
He placed the flowers in the vase and set it on the counter, then carried her over to the couch.
“I know I said we’d figure out each day as it came, but not talking about the future is eating me alive.” He laid her on her back and came down over her. “There are a few things we need to clarify.”
“So you’re trapping me beneath you like a prisoner?” she teased.
“What was it that Abe said? Control? Confidence?”
“You’ve got those down pat.” In more ways than one.
“Good, then hear me out. The way I see it, all we know right now is that you’re leaving next week to go back to California, and I’ll join you a few weeks later, when I finish the railing. We’ll spend a week together, and then I’ll head out to Texas to work on the piece for the foundation.” Grayson’s calming voice soothed her nerves. “And beyond that, we have no idea about your schedule. Do I have that right?”
“Yes, I think so. When it was just me, having an ever-changing schedule was fine. But I hate it now, and I know it’s not going to be easy. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, and don’t worry. We both have important careers. We’ll figure this out. Maybe not today, or next week, but if we want this to work, we’ll find a way.”
“But what if we can’t find a solution, and we miss each other too much?”
“Then we deal with it and make whatever changes need to be made. I spent today tied in knots about not having the answers, and it sucked. But I realized we don’t need an answer today, baby, or tomorrow. All we need is the trust that we’ll work together to figure it out. This is our real life. Now, here, us.”
Christmas lifted his head.
“And your boy,” he said, making her love him even more. “Parker, in all the months we were emailing, I was never once with anyone else.”
Shocked at his confession, it was all she could do to remember to breathe. She blinked up at him, trying to process the new, heartwarming information.
“I wasn’t either,” she finally managed. “But I’ve never dated a lot, so that’s not unusual for me. But you? I’ve seen women checking you out everywhere we go, and you’re so sexual. I’m surprised that you would do that, when we weren’t even a couple.”
His eyes warmed. “I told you I felt like we had something special, and I’d hoped that once we saw each other we’d see we had more. Sweetheart, I’m the way I am with you because of what I feel for you. But before you, sex was just sex, totally different from what we have together. I don’t want you to worry about me being faithful, no matter how long we’re separated.”
“Grayson, I’d never—”
He silenced her with a kiss.
“I never thought you would, but I wanted you to know I wouldn’t. There’s no one else for me, Parker. Just you.”
“For me, too. There’s only you, Grayson. I love you so much. I’ve been afraid to say it, because what if we can’t figure out how to make it work? I thought it would hurt more if I’d said the words, which was really stupid. It would probably hurt more if I’d never told you how much I love you and that I think I was falling for you over all those months we were emailing. And now I’m rambling, and…” She drew in a deep breath. “I love you, Grayson. I love you so much.”
“Trust me, baby, even if you’d never told me, I knew you loved me.”
“I do trust you. I’ve trusted you since day one. Just look at our perfect kiss. That is a kiss of trust.”
He wrinkled his brow and followed her gaze to the picture Sky had given her, which she’d proudly placed on the coffee table, and he shook his head.
“Oh, stop. Sky gave it to us. You know you love it as much as I do.”
“Kissing you? Darn right I do. At least all those Hollywood hotshots will know you’re taken.” He ran his hand down her hip. “You look gorgeous in this sexy little dress. Maybe you shouldn’t wear it when I’m not around.”
“Mm. You look pretty hot yourself.” She ran her hands over his shoulders. “Maybe you shouldn’t wear any clothes when I’m around.”
“Your wish is my command.” He reached behind him and tugged his shirt off. Every time he did that it sent shivers from her head to her toes.
“I got you a surprise today.”
“Yeah?” He kissed her collarbone.
“Mm-hm. It’s on me. You’ll have to find it.”
“I do love a challenge.” His mouth took a leisurely stroll along her shoulder, placing tantalizing kisses all the way down her arm to the tips of each of her fingers.
His eyes narrowed seductively. “I’m going to have to be excruciatingly thorough.”
“I wouldn’t want it any other way.”