Chapter Sixteen
The last days of school went by in a blur for Lucia. She was still avoiding Connor, but she was also trying to do the same when it came to her parents. Now that their plans were out in the open, they were talking about it all the time.
“You know, considering you’re getting hot sex, like, most days of the week, you’d think you’d look happier,” Marie said, coming to lean against her locker.
“Keep your voice down.” Lucia glanced around the main hall.
“Oh, please, it’s not like anyone ever paid us attention before and they’re not going to now. Seriously, what’s up?” Marie asked.
Lucia sighed, putting one of her books back inside her locker. “It has been a long couple of days.”
“It’s Christmas. We’re on our last day, and you’re miserable. Please tell me what is wrong with this picture.”
“Moving to London,” Lucia said. She turned to her friend, and Marie’s mouth formed a perfect O. “We’re moving, and I’m not even looking at colleges closer, and everything is moving so fast. They have this plan, and I don’t know how to stop it.”
“Start looking at colleges, Lucia. It doesn’t have to be this hard.”
“Why do you make everything sound so simple?” Lucia asked.
“Because life is. It’s only the very weird and stubborn people that make it a hell of a lot harder than it actually needs to be.” Marie sighed. “You know after Christmas I turn eighteen.”
“Any news on your ranch hand guy?” She knew that Marie had been keeping in touch with him.
“Nope. Last I heard he was traveling across Europe. It sounds very exotic, right? Europe. He enters rodeos, takes odd jobs, that kind of thing.”
“I guess. Only if you want to go there and you can’t. Then it seems very exotic, but it doesn’t mean that it is,” Lucia said, closing her locker. She didn’t move away.
“I feel all blue and miserable,” Marie said. “My aunt and uncle are coming this year for Christmas, and I’ve been moved into my brother’s room. The loser farts, like, every single time I’m near him.”
Lucia chuckled. “It’s going to be one smelly Christmas for you.”
“How are you and Mr. Parker going to go?”
Again, she looked around.
“Get over yourself. We’re the unpopular ones, remember? We’re the lame-os that no one cares about.”
As Lucia held onto her chemistry book, they started walking down the hall. “I don’t know what we’re going to do. We’re thinking of having a day before the big one.”
“Your parents are not working this year?”
“Nope. They’ve even planned to have a turkey. It’s our last Christmas there.”
“Wow, I bet that sucks. You’re not wanting to move, and now they’re emphasizing everything by being home,” Marie said.
“Yep, that’s pretty much it.”
“You know for senior year, it sucks big time.”
Lucia was about to say something else when an arm landing across her shoulders made her pause.
“Hello, fatty,” Connor said.
Pulling out from under his arm, she tried to ignore him.
“So, what are you doing this year?” Connor asked. “My parents have a yacht, and we’re heading down to the Italian coast. Spending time there this Christmas.”
“You know, we were talking here,” Marie said, glaring at Connor.
“Buzz it,” Connor said.
Marie went to open her mouth, and Lucia stepped in front of her friend. “Leave her alone. No! I don’t know what the hell is going on with you or with this, but it stops now. I’m not interested in sleeping with you or being part of your games. I’m done. I don’t like you touching me, just stop! There’s no way I’ll ever, ever fall for your crap or your games.”
Quickly grabbing Marie’s arm, she pulled her along, moving out of earshot. She saw Jack as she passed his classroom, and even though she wanted to stop to talk to him, she couldn’t do it. This was just another painful aspect of their relationship. No one could know that they’re together.
“Holy crap, you just totally handed Connor his ass. That guy gives me the creeps,” Marie said, shuddering.
“You and me both.”
“You know I’ve heard a lot of rumors about that guy.”
“They don’t surprise me. He’s always hiding behind his daddy.”
“You’ve walked me to my class,” Marie said. “You’re the other side of the building.”
“I know, but I needed to get away and walking you to your class is the best thing that I could do.” She waited outside of Marie’s classroom.
Her friend hugged her, and Lucia left, but she didn’t go to class. Instead, she made her way toward the main field. She sat beneath the bleachers on one of the chairs. Even though she was cold, she didn’t make her way inside school.
She just seemed to be so fucking tense.
No matter what she did … everything seemed to be crumbling all around her.
“You know, skipping school is not the answer,” Jack said, startling her.
“Shouldn’t you be teaching a class?”
“Shouldn’t you be actually attending one?”
Lucia gripped the edge of her book. “I just needed some fresh air.”
“I saw what happened between you and Connor. You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. I was just bored with all the crap that he had going on.” She rubbed at her eyes. “Sorry, I don’t seem to be the best company.”
He crouched down beside her, his hand resting on her knee. “What’s wrong? It’s the last day of school, and you should be happy.”
“It’s just … I don’t want to talk about it. I just really don’t want to be here.”
“Did you drop Marie off today?” he asked.
“No.”
He pulled his keys from his pocket. “Go to my place. Take a bath, relax. I’ll find Marie, let her know that you’re not feeling well.”
“You shouldn’t be encouraging me to take time off.” She smiled.
“I know, but you need it.” He gripped her hand. “I’ll be there after school.”
She took the keys from him and watched him go. Holding the keys, she left the school, made her way across the parking lot, and climbed into her car.
Without a backward glance, she made her way toward Jack’s home.
She parked down the street and made her way inside his home.
Closing the door, she leaned against it, recalling every single moment that he’d pressed her against the door and kissed her.
Touching her lips, she closed her eyes, and peace finally settled on her. She didn’t feel so tense being in his home. Dropping her bag into the sitting room, she smiled at the tree that was decorated in twinkling lights.
She’d loved every second of helping him prepare that tree.
Running fingers through her hair, she blew out a breath, and made her way upstairs to his bedroom. She entered his room and smiled as she saw his neatly-made bed.
This was her teacher’s bed.
Moving across the room, she made her way toward the en-suite bathroom, and she started to run herself a bath.
Stripping out of her clothes, she paused as she caught sight of her reflection. Staring at her face, she took a deep breath. “I’m in love with Jack Parker,” she said. “I’m in love with him, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him, but…” She stopped, feeling her tears well up.
There was no happy ending for them.
No way of either of them could make this work.
He was her teacher.
This was forbidden.
Stepping away from the mirror, she climbed into the hot water and leaned back, staring up at the ceiling.
There was no future for either of them.
That hurt her. She couldn’t see a possible future for them.
Blowing out a breath, she rested her elbow against the inside of the tub. She couldn’t even tell him how she felt. It was too selfish of her.
Her parents were planning to move.
Everything was in motion, and her life was spinning out of control with absolutely no way of stopping it.
Kissing Jack a few months ago had seemed like the craziest thing she’d ever done. Texting him, making love to him, fucking him, it had all been building to something. She didn’t want it to be where she walked away. But how could it be any different? Their relationship had to remain a secret. There was no future for them.
After she washed herself, she quickly pulled on one of his robes and made her way downstairs.
Making herself a cup of coffee, she sat in his sitting room, feet curled up beneath her, staring at the tree. It was such a beautiful tree.
Her cell phone pinged. Reaching out for it, she flicked it open to see Marie texting.
Marie: You okay?
Lucia: I’m fine.
Marie: Skipping class does not make it fine.
Lucia: Just having a rough day.
Marie: Tell me.
Lucia: Just thinking about me and Jack. You know. What’s going to happen next year?
Marie: Ah, I get it. You just realizing that this entire thing could blow over?
Lucia: I love him.
She jumped as her cell phone started to ring.
“Holy shit, you love him? Like honest to God have feelings for this guy? I thought you weren’t serious before.”
“Yes.”
“Wow, that is really serious, Lucia. That’s … a lot.”
“I know.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know. I can’t tell him.”
“Why not?” Marie asked.
Lucia bit her lip.
“I don’t know. I just can’t.”
“That’s so fucking lame.”
“What if he doesn’t love me? What is the point of saying something else or making this worse?”
“How can you make it worse?”
“Because I love him, and you and I both know nothing else could ever come of it. How can we be together? It won’t work out.”
“Look, just because everything looks weird right now, it doesn’t mean that it won’t work out.”
“I think this is wrong.”
“No, Lucia. You love him, and you can’t ignore that.”
“I can’t tell him. At least, not yet. It just … it’s wrong.”
“Running and hiding is not the answer, but I won’t blow your secrets to your very hot teacher boyfriend.”
“Hey!”
“What? It’s true. I’ve just pulled up onto my drive. Yay, Christmas is about to begin, and my family is all here. Aunt and Uncle. My life is about to go to shit.”
“Ah, smelly Christmas.”
“Yep. If you’re needing me to cover for you, give me a call and I will do my best. Think about it though, Lucia. Time is ticking, and you’re both on limited time.”
Staring down at her cell phone, Lucia released a breath.
They were both on borrowed time.
Finishing off her coffee, she moved toward the tree. Sitting in front of it she saw the large square box that was wrapped.
“To Lucia, every time you look at this, I hope you think of me. Merry Christmas. Love, Jack.” She ran her thumb across his name.
When had her life gotten so messed up?
Thinking back, she recalled that first-ever kiss. The way she’d stepped toward him, pressed her lips against his, and then instantly pulled away, afraid yet excited. She’d never for a second imagined herself on his sitting room floor in front of a Christmas tree, scared of the future.
A few minutes later she heard his front door opening. She didn’t move but glanced up at him as he rounded the corner.
“Hey,” she said.
“Hey. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, just admiring the view. You did a fantastic job.”
Jack dropped his briefcase on the floor beside the chair, removing his scarf and jacket before taking a seat behind her. He put his legs on either side of hers and wrapped his arms around her.
“Are you trying to open your presents early?”
“You’re sad,” he said.
“I’m not sad. Just thinking.”
“What did I tell you about thinking?” he asked, pressing a kiss to her cheek.
“Do you want this to end?” she asked. “At the end of graduation?”
Silence met her question. She went to pull away, but he held her close, refusing to let her go.
“Let me go,” she said.
“Will you just sit still and listen? Stop having a temper tantrum.”
“You didn’t answer.”
“That’s because it’s hard for me to.”
“How can it be hard? It’s a simple yes-and-no answer.”
“No!” He yelled, which made her pause. They were both panting, and she glanced over her shoulder, watching him. “No, I don’t want this to be the end when it comes to graduation. If you want me to be honest, Lucia, I don’t see an end in sight. I’ve not got a clock ticking on this relationship. I never did.”
“Then … why?”
“Because we do have a clock ticking, don’t we? Only it’s not one we’ve set ourselves. I … I want to be selfish. I want to beg you to stay here. To go to college close and that we can make this work. In time people will forget and then we can do the whole fake meet-up thing and then we have so much in common or something. People wouldn’t even guess that we’ve been together fucking years.” He stood up, and she watched him pull away.
“Jack?”
“I’ve never … this has never happened to me before, Lucia. I don’t want to ruin your life by making you not do things.”
“I know you wouldn’t do that.”
“This isn’t about me though, Lucia. This is about you and your needs. I can’t be selfish with you.” He stepped up toward her, tilting her head back. “I will do whatever it needs to make this work, that I promise you.” He pressed a kiss to her lips. “I don’t see this as a bit of fun. The whole forbidden shit. I see you, Lucia. I see an amazing, beautiful, kind woman that I love being around.” He stroked her cheek. “We’ll make it work.”
“How do you know?”
“Because we have to. Because I don’t want to think of not having you in my life, so I’ll do whatever it takes to make it work.” He rested his head against hers, and she closed her eyes.
They would make it work.
She had to believe in that.
****
Christmas came and went. Jack couldn’t recall the time ever flying by so fast. His parents sent him a gift, a brand-new car, and also some new stocks and shares they thought he’d be interested in. He’d checked the market and for now used the money to invest. The car, however, was a bit of a pain as he loved his own car. The one that he’d purchased on a second-hand lot.
Lucia had been surprised by it when she finally stole a few hours while her parents were talking with the realtor about the house.
Other than a few odd hours spent with Lucia, most of his Christmas was spent alone grading papers or watching some reality show on television.
He loved the quiet and peace of Christmas. He caught up on all of his work and was able to spend some time planning for the return of school.
While he was alone, he also took some time checking out some of the schools in England. Yes, he was considering a move to England just in case.
He didn’t want to be selfish, but he also didn’t want to be without Lucia. When she wasn’t around, he missed her.
Their time together was some of the happiest of his life. He even found himself planning a future with her, seeing them together, possibly a family. Yes, he was smitten.
By the time school was back in session, he was more than ready for it.
Arriving at school, he noticed several groups of students gathered together, talking. He made his way toward the classroom, feeling like something had changed, and he didn’t quite know what it was.
He was opening up the blinds when Lucia and Marie appeared in his classroom.
“Did you hear?” Marie asked.
“Hear what?” he asked.
“About Principal Dowed?”
Lucia shrugged her shoulders. “She’s only just told me.”
“What about him?”
“He was removed from the school. I’m surprised you’ve not heard anything. It’s been all around school. Someone reported him for taking bribes and money to help doctor students’ grades. Apparently, he’s been investigated for months, and they finally caught him on camera making a deal. He kept a record of it, or someone did. Anyway, not only did they remove him from office but also Connor was arrested over Christmas as well.”
Now this did perk him up a bit. He’d not gotten the information.
“What happened?” Jack asked.
“He got caught on possession charges, and he was with Rachel, who was also high. Seriously, how did you two not hear this?” Marie asked.
“Grading papers,” he said, holding up the stack of paperwork.
“My parents are going through all of their stuff. They’re not moving everything with them, and they’ve started shipping some things to the U.K. They’ve got someone there who’ll take it to the home they’ve purchased,” Lucia said.
This was news to him.
“I didn’t know that,” he said.
“Oh, I feel I need to move out of the way of this argument. Let’s face it though, we all knew Connor and Rachel were using. That’s all I’m going to say,” Marie said, holding up her hands and disappearing out of the room.
Jack didn’t pay her any attention. His focus was on Lucia.
“It has only just happened in the past couple of days. They’ve found a buyer for the house, and they don’t need it until the summer. Agreements and contracts are underway, and we’re going through everything.”
This became more real now.
“Tick-tock, I guess. That ticking clock that neither of us hears but are very much aware of.”
He didn’t want to think about that stupid, damn ticking clock.
“Mr. Parker,” Ms. Bertram said, interrupting him.
They were at school and shouldn’t be having this conversation in the open.
“Ms. Bertram,” he said. “We’ll talk about whatever you need during class, Lucia.”
He turned his back on her and listened as she left his classroom.
“I’d be careful around that one,” Beth said.
“Excuse me?”
“Surely you know girls that age have a crush. Lucia is spending a lot of time around your classroom. The last thing you’d want to do is give her the wrong impression.”
“Lucia’s a smart girl.”
“Yeah, and I see the adoration in her eyes. Just because she’s young—I remember being eighteen and so full of hormones. I’d have done anything to bang a teacher as well.”
“You know what, I don’t want to talk about this right now. What do you want, Beth?”
“Surely you’ve heard that Dowed’s indiscretions have come to light. Taking bribes to change grades to help his students.”
“Yes, I heard.”
“We have a new principal, and she’s waiting in her office. Her name’s Helen Brandt.”
“Okay, then,” he said, leaving his classroom.
Heading down the long corridor, he heard snippets of gossip.
“I heard she was sucking him off and he was snorting when the cops got to them…”
“He raped someone.”
“She’s a terrorist.”
“He’s part of the mafia.”
“Drugs and orgies.”
Each one more elaborate than the next.
Entering the main reception area, he saw Dowed’s name had been replaced with Brandt’s. “A new day,” he said to himself.
Knocking on the door, he waited to be called to enter.
“Come in,” Brandt said.
As he entered the office, a brown-haired woman with glasses looked at him over the desk. “Ah, I take it you’re Mr. Parker.”
“The very one.”
“That will be all, Ms. Bertram.”
He nodded at Beth, then took a seat opposite the new principal’s desk. “I’ve only been made aware of this sudden change. I’d have come and introduced myself before I made my way to the class.”
“It was such a quick turnaround. No one wanted Beyer Hill to be without a head teacher, and seeing as Dowed’s doctored grades, every student’s report sheet is being investigated. We want everything to run as smooth as possible. To help with that transition I’m just inviting everyone here so that we can say a quick hello and move on. I’m Helen Brandt. I will be here temporarily, unless, of course, they don’t find a replacement.” She sat behind her desk and sighed. “I’ve got to ask, were you aware of this situation?”
“I was aware something was going on. One of my students, Connor.”
“Connor Mills, yes, I’ve been made aware of his indiscretions.”
“I called on him in class. He answered a question wrong, he didn’t like it, and I was pulled into the office. My job was called into question. It seems the boy’s father has a history of removing teachers that caused a problem for his son.”
“That is exactly where the complaint came from. It would seem Mills got one too many teachers fired, and because of it, this investigation opened up, which found Dowed’s guilt. I, myself, am deeply shocked by what I discovered. Covering up students’ drug problems, being paid to make sure students have the right grade to suit the parents. This is a damn school, not some political circus or television drama. How did you keep your job? Everyone else got tossed out on their asses?”
“I happen to have two of the best lawyers in the country as parents.”
“Ah, you’re one of those Parkers?”
“You heard of my parents?”
“I’ve heard of the Parkers. They don’t only take the big, expensive cases for famous people, they do pro bono work as well. A few years ago, they helped me and another colleague out of a sexual harassment case. A female student had tried to blackmail one of the teachers. It was a very messy business. He wouldn’t give her the grade she wanted and so she accused him of being inappropriate. They are tigers in their fields. It’s damn good to know their son is here in this school.” She stood and offered him her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, and I look forward to us all getting this school back on track.”
He shook her hand, pleased that Dowed was gone. He didn’t like that the principal could be manipulated, and his gut told him that Brandt would be a damn good replacement for that son of a bitch.
The entire day was filled with students talking about Dowed, Connor, and Rachel. It seemed a little surreal to have all three of his problems dealt with. Still, Dowed’s firing had nothing to do with Connor and Rachel, as they had been done for possession charges. There was no way their parents could get them out of that sticky situation, and he did recall warning them that there would come a point when no one would be able to help them.
Knowing Lucia wasn’t at risk of being hurt, he felt calmer. She’d be safe to walk the halls, and he wouldn’t have to worry about her being accosted by that fucker or beaten by that bitch.
Finishing off the day, he felt positive for the future.
He was gathering his things when Marie knocked on the door, surprising him.
“Marie, how can I help you?” he asked.
“I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Okay.” He nodded for her to close the door. “What is it? Is it to do with English?” He didn’t have Marie. She was taught by the other professor, Kingsley.
“No, it doesn’t have anything to do with school, to be honest.”
He leaned against the edge of his desk, seeing that she was nervous. “What’s wrong, Marie?”
Lucia loved her friend, and he found himself feeling protective of anyone that Lucia cared about.
“I don’t know. I’m kind of torn right now. I shouldn’t be here, but I know that Lucia won’t say anything.”
“This has something to do with Lucia? Is she hurt?”
Marie shook her head. “She’s not hurt, but it is about her feelings. Crap. You know what, if this makes me an awful friend, so be it. She’s in love with you.”
Jack stared at her, not really sure what the problem was.
“Lucia loves you, but she’s too afraid to tell you because … she knows you love your job, and with everything changing in a few months, I know it’s tearing her apart, but she’s scared.”
“Why is she scared?”
“Of losing you and of you not feeling the same way. I … I love my friend very much, and I know she loves you. I don’t—how will you even make this work? You’re her teacher, and she’s moving away, which I hate so much, but I don’t know what to do.”
“Now I’m confused. Are you telling me that she loves me? Or that she’s moving away?”
“Both. She loves you, and she’s trying not to be selfish with you. She won’t tell you, but I think you have a right to know, and also, do you love her?”
He stared at her, knowing the answer to that.
Marie stared at him.
“You’re sure she loves me?”
“Yes. She told me.” She pulled her cell phone out and handed it to him. “See.”
He stared down at the words and smiled. She loved him. Neither of them had said the words of love. He’d been hesitant to express his feelings for her.
This was not how he anticipated his life to go.
“I don’t want to make things awkward for you, but I also know she can be so stubborn. She loves you, Mr. Parker. I care about her, and I want to see her happy.”
“I would never do anything to hurt her.”
“I believe that, I really do.”
“But?”
“She’s going to leave. What are you doing to do then?”
He ran a hand down his face, no longer sure anymore what Marie was trying to say or do.
“Are you wanting me to end it with her?”
“No, of course not. I don’t know why I came here, just that I needed to tell you. Don’t tell Lucia that I told you, please.”
“I won’t.” He was now so confused.
Lucia loved him. He’d seen that text, and he knew he loved her.
Their future together was so uncertain. She was leaving the country with her family, and he didn’t know if he had a right to stop it, let alone if he should.
Everything was fucked up right now.
When he was younger, he thought he had all the fucking answers, but now?
Now he didn’t have a clue what to do.