Chapter Fourteen
“You know you’ve been a lot weirder than normal, and you don’t talk as much either,” Marie said.
Lucia looked up from the book she was studying to see her best friend standing over her. Thanksgiving had been a bust when it came to studying, so she was catching up, using all of her spare time at the library to try to get all of her assignments done.
“Wow, your manners need a lot of work. Does your mother know you just go around school calling your BFF weird?” she asked.
Marie chuckled. “There’s the girl I know and love.” She pulled out a chair and sat down on it.
Every time she was with Marie, Lucia found it a little exhausting. The guilt weighed heavy on her, and she couldn’t make it stop. She wanted to scream the truth, but she couldn’t. This was between her and Jack. She wouldn’t do anything to hurt him, even though her best friend wouldn’t tell a soul.
“So I totally heard a rumor around school that Rachel wants to smash your face in.”
This made her pause, looking up at her friend. “Really?” She’d not had an incident with Rachel, or with Connor for that matter.
Years of being bullied by them had meant she had perfected the art of staying out of their way.
“Yep, I take it that you didn’t know?”
“No. I wonder what I did now.” She’d avoided the cafeteria because as much fun as it was having her father stick up for her, she didn’t like the bruise that decorated her face afterward.
“Does it really matter? It’s Rachel.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not exactly thrilled to be watching my back either. I don’t get what her problem is.”
“You don’t?” Marie rested her head on her hand.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Her pen was poised on her notebook.
“Look, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but have you seen the way Connor looks at you lately? He’s always around you, and again the rumor mill—”
“I’m getting tired of this rumor mill, okay? Connor is just an asshole who takes a great deal of enjoyment in humiliating me. Not only that, no one has heard what he says to me. Sure, he plays up to the whole drama, but he’s a piece of shit and mean. Now when it comes to Rachel, again, cruelty. I’m sick and tired of all this crap.” She slammed her book closed, feeling her anger rise.
“Wow,” Marie said. “That has really pissed you off.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m tired of all this bullshit.” Lucia rubbed her temples. It had been a couple of weeks since Thanksgiving had ended, and her parents were home more and more. She’d heard them talking about London, relocation, and it was starting to freak her out. Then of course she hadn’t been able to get away to go and see Jack. Between the weather, school, her parents, everything had been working against her.
She missed him more than anything.
Marie held her hands up in surrender. “Sorry. Don’t kill the messenger and all. What is with you lately?”
“What do you mean?”
“We rarely have a movie day. You don’t come over as much as you used to. Something has got to be bugging you.”
“Nothing is bugging me.” She had to lie all the time, and the easiest way of not doing it was avoiding everyone.
Her life had become one big mess of avoiding.
“I’ve … got to go and ask Mr. Parker a question,” she said, pushing all of her books into her bag.
“Seriously? You’re blowing me off for a teacher?”
“I was ill over Thanksgiving, Marie. I’m behind on a lot of things, and you know what my parents are like if my grades start to drop. I can’t … I’ve got to go and see him.” She winced at the desperation she heard in her tone.
She had to keep her voice down and stop letting all of this get to her. She was better than this.
With her bag hiked high on her shoulder, she left the library and headed toward Jack’s classroom.
Everything seemed to be going to shit, and she hated that.
Standing outside of his classroom, she saw Beth in the room, and she leaned against the wall, hating that jealousy that suddenly gripped her at the sight of him with another woman.
“So, I was thinking that we could all go out again. I know for a fact that Derick would just love it.”
“I’m not interested, Beth. I’ve got a lot to do, and I don’t have time to keep going out.”
Was that because of her?
Had she caused him to be behind with his work?
No matter what she seemed to do today, she was a complete and utter fuck-up.
Just wait.
“Come on, Jack. It’s really not that hard. A couple of hours. I’ll make it worth your while. I certainly know a thing or two that will keep you entertained. I do this really wicked thing, and I can swallow your cock whole.”
Oh, my God, that is just… She was going to move away from the wall, and leave them to it, but one of her books fell out of her bag, and she winced, bending down to pick it up.
She hoped neither of them realized how hot her cheeks were or that she’d been leaning against the wall listening.
Could a woman really swallow a cock without dying?
Lack of breath and all that?
Picking up her book, she stood in the doorway. “Erm, I was wondering if I could have a word with Mr. Parker? There’s an assignment that I have to … complete.” She didn’t look at Ms. Bertram. Right now, she didn’t think she could stomach being near the other woman.
“Sure, if you’ll excuse me, Ms. Bertram, I have to help Lucia.”
“Think about it.”
Wow, could women really be that forward without coming across as being a slut?
He didn’t say anything, but he gave a nod as if he’d consider it.
Tapping her fingers against her thigh, she stepped into the room and forced herself to smile at Ms. Bertram.
She didn’t have any way of warning the other woman. She just had to accept that, and she hated it.
There was no way she could claim Jack for herself.
“Miss Deen, how can I help?”
She approached his desk, and words failed her. He stood in front of it, but her gaze was caught on the cuffs of his shirt. The ink wrapped around his wrists, peeking through.
“I, erm, is she like that all the time with you?”
“Yes, it would appear that Beth doesn’t like to take no for an answer.”
She sighed. He reached out, and his fingers grazed her hip, sliding down to cup her hand.
It was dangerous.
If they were caught, it would be a nightmare for them both. She didn’t want to be the one responsible for getting him fired.
“I don’t like it,” she said, feeling tears fill her eyes. “I don’t like not being able to say something to her. Like leave him alone, he’s…”
She didn’t finish. She couldn’t.
“Like I’m yours?” he asked. “I know what you’re feeling, Lucia. You don’t think I experience it every single time I see Connor sitting in front of you? How I want to pound the fucking face of my student? Or when I see him near you when you’re in your locker. There’s a lot of things I don’t like, but I have to deal with them. Beth, she’s not a problem. Not even in the slightest. She holds no appeal for me.” He kissed her knuckles. “Now, did you need me to help you with homework or did you have something else in mind?”
“I miss you … so much.”
“Yes. I’d been hoping that you’d come to see me.”
“I think something is going on with London. I don’t know what, but they could be relocating there.”
“Lucia, if they relocate, there’s a chance you’ll be going with them.”
She shook her head. This was all just too much.
Prior to starting school at the end of the summer, she’d have been all for a move, but now, it risked everything. The one person she loved seeing, that filled her with enjoyment, was this man right here, and if … if she moved that would all go.
“I don’t want to go.”
He held her hand just a little tighter, and she felt that need within him as well. “We all have to do things we don’t like, Lucia. That is unfortunate, but it’s also life.”
She nodded. “I didn’t need to see you about any homework. I just wanted to come and see you.”
He cupped her face, tilting her head back. “Don’t for a second think that you’re the only one affected by this. You’re not. I miss you all the time, Lucia.”
“The gym,” she said, suddenly.
“What about it?”
“Mom, she reminded me this morning that she’d paid for me to go.”
“So? I don’t see how going to a gym is important.”
“It gives me a reason to leave the house. I can say I’m going to the gym, and drive to see you.”
“I love that idea, Lucia, but when they see you’re not losing weight they’ll get suspicious.”
“You could help me. You run. We could do some warm-up exercises or something. It’s a shot.” She felt hope bloom, and when he smiled, she knew she got him.
“Lucia Deen, you are a temptation I cannot seem to hide or to shake, and you know what, I don’t want to either.”
With her head tilted back, he stepped forward, and she smiled up at him. All of her troubles melted away, and the only person that mattered to her was right here, in this very room. His lips brushed across hers, and she moaned, gripping his shoulders a little tighter, not wanting to let him go even for a second.
His tongue traced across her lips, and her eyes closed. When she opened her mouth, he plundered inside, and she tasted him, relishing every second as he stroked his tongue with hers.
She held his arms, not wanting to let him go.
This moment was what she’d been wanting.
That sweet little dance together that promised so much more.
She couldn’t lose this.
It was the only thing in her life right now that made any sense. Nothing else ever made sense to her.
As his fingers sank into her hair, and the kiss deepened, he pressed his body against hers, and she felt the hard ridge of his length that she wanted so badly to be fucking her hard. There were no sweet or easy words for the touch that she craved. All she wanted was him, all around her, inside her, fucking her raw as she screamed his name.
Within a second that was taken away as a gasp filled the air, seeming to echo off the walls with the fierceness of it.
Jack tensed at the same time as she did.
Pulling away from him, she turned around, and there in the doorway stood her friend. Marie looked shocked, angered, scared, and the worst of all, betrayed.
“You left this,” Marie said, holding up her cell phone.
Her friend’s face was bright red, and guilt swamped her as she stared at Marie.
Before she could take the phone or say anything, Marie turned on her heel and ran out of the room.
“I’ll fix this,” Lucia said, spinning around to look at Jack. “She won’t ever forgive me.”
“If she’s your friend, she will.”
“I’ve got to go.” She didn’t kiss him again like she wanted to. She spun around, racing across the school. Marie was already walking away from the parking lot. Lucia had been the one to drive them into school that day. Rushing to Marie’s side, she caught her arm.
“Please, stop,” Lucia said.
“All this time, I thought something was going on with you, and I was right, so fucking right. He’s a teacher, Lucia. An old teacher.”
“Marie, please, I am begging you, keep your voice down.” There were not many students around, but she didn’t want to draw attention to this.
“Do you even have a clue what you’re doing? What he’s doing? You need to report him for abuse or rape or whatever the hell it is.”
“It’s not rape or abuse.”
“He’s your teacher, Lucia. He’s older than you, and there’s a code.”
“I’m eighteen,” she said.
“What about when it all started, huh? I bet he’s brainwashing you, is that it? Pick the vulnerable girl to get your kicks out of. Is that what this is all about? Is that why you’re suddenly not available?”
“It’s not like that, I promise.”
“I don’t get it, Lucia. I really don’t. You’re … you’re better than this.”
“Let’s talk, okay? I can stay over at your house, and we can talk.”
Marie shook her head. “I’m confused.”
“Then let me make it up to you. I promise. You and me, and we’ll talk all night, I promise.”
“You said that twice.”
“Let me drive you home.”
Marie stared at her. “Tonight, and then if what you have to say is total crap, we’re reporting his ass tomorrow.”
Lucia nodded. There was no way she’d report him. Nothing that was going on between them was wrong. Okay, the student-teacher element was wrong, so fucking wrong, but that wasn’t a problem, at least not to her.
“Fine. Please.”
“Yes, but I keep this until afterward,” Marie said, holding onto the phone.
“Marie?”
“No, you owe me this. You’ve been lying to me, and I can’t … I need to make sure you’re okay. Your parents don’t even know?”
“Of course not.”
“Then I’m going to be the one looking out for you. No questions asked,” Marie said.
She always knew her best friend was overprotective. “Deal.”
They walked toward her car in silence. She didn’t know what to say, but the guilt ate away at her.
Lucia drove to her own home, seeing two cars parked in the driveway. Her parents were home.
Her heart raced as Marie climbed out of the car, and she stopped. “Please, don’t tell them.”
“Lucia, we have a deal. I won’t break that, no matter what.”
Entering her home, she paused as she heard her parents talking.
“She could go to university there. I’ve already spoken to the Dean. He’s looked over Lucia’s work—”
She turned to Marie, whose eyes had just gotten wide.
“Mom, Dad, I’m home,” she said, moving toward the dining room. Right now, she didn’t want to think of her future. It was getting clearer that a relocation to London was on the cards, but she just didn’t know when it was happening.
She had to fix her other problem before she started to try to deal with this one.
Her parents closed whatever file they’d been looking at and smiled over at her. “Lucia, honey, you’re home early. I thought you were studying.”
“I was, but Marie and I feel the need for a girls’ night. I’m just grabbing some clothes.”
“Marie, it’s good to see you,” her father said.
“Yep, you two too. So, university. Isn’t that like a British way of saying college?”
“I’m going to go and grab some clothes.” She left Marie to her parents, not feeling even the slightest bit of guilt about it.
Her life was unraveling in ways that she couldn’t control. Her parents hadn’t even asked her what she thought of a relocation, and now this crazy shit with Marie over Jack. Everything was a nightmare.
Shoving some clothes into a bag, she made her way downstairs to see Marie’s arms folded. She looked pissed.
“I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Lucia said.
She didn’t linger and was back in the car within a minute.
Marie fastened her seatbelt.
“You do know what that is all about, don’t you?” Marie asked.
“I have a hunch.”
“Lucia, they’re planning a big move right now, and you’ve not even told me.”
Lucia winced, pulling out of the drive. “I don’t even know, okay? They’ve not said a word to me. In fact, they keep changing the subject, and I didn’t want to talk about it.”
“When did you become the avoider of all things? Weren’t you the one that said in order to deal with this life you’ve got to hit things head-on?” Marie asked.
“A lot of things are going on in my life right now and moving is in the cards, and I don’t want to know. I’m not trying to do this to be awkward. It’s happening. I know that. I just … I want to not think about it.”
“You can’t keep doing that,” Marie said.
“For now I don’t want to think about it. The longer they keep it to themselves, the better I feel. They’ve not even found a buyer for their house yet, so I’ve got a bit of time.”
“Wow, Lucia, buyers can be found within days. He has really messed with your head.”
“No, he hasn’t.”
“I mean it. If he’s hurt you or put you in a position that makes me uncomfortable then I’m going to make sure you do the right thing.”
“I kissed him,” Lucia said. “I was the one that started it, Marie. He didn’t.”
“What?”
“On my eighteenth birthday, after class, I kissed him, and then I ran away as if I had been fucking burned, okay?”
“Is that all it’s been? A kiss?”
“No.”
“What do you mean?”
“After my parents were a no-show on my birthday, I texted him, and then I went over to his house.”
She paused, not wanting to say anything more, but Marie wouldn’t let her.
“And?”
“And we had sex. There. Are you happy? We had sex, and it was the best experience of my life, and he was amazing. We’ve been seeing each other since, and no, he’s not after just sex. He’s taken care of me. Over Thanksgiving I was so sick that I passed out on my bathroom floor. I’d left a window open, and I could be dead right now if it wasn’t for him. So, before you judge him harshly or think we need to ruin his life, I’m the one that pursued him, Marie. I’m the one that wanted this to happen. Even if it is just sex for him, I don’t care, because I’ve loved every single second and wouldn’t trade it.”
“It sounds like you love him,” Marie said. “The way you look … just everything. You’re in love with him.”
She pulled into Marie’s driveway, feeling the tears flood her eyes. The emotion seemed to completely floor her. Resting her head on the steering wheel, she let everything come out as she sobbed into her hands.
Marie’s rubbed her back, not saying a word, as she unleashed everything. Every single tear as she was overcome with fear, panic, happiness, sadness, and pleasure.
“Come on, let’s go inside before my mom comes out. You know I’m a terrible liar.”
“You’re an awesome liar.”
“I know, but come on.”
They made their way inside, and when Marie’s mom stopped them, her best friend showed how expert she was.
“Yeah, the Connor dude I was telling you about in school, he’s been saying awful things, and Lucia’s been doing the whole running thing so it completely knocked her confidence.”
“Lucia, honey, do not listen to those boys. You want to find a man who’ll appreciate those curves, and believe me, there’s one out there for you.”
“We’re going to go and study, Mom.”
Following Marie upstairs, they entered her room, and Lucia slumped down on the bed, feeling completely exhausted. “Not a good liar?” Lucia asked.
“Yeah, well, it takes one to know one,” Marie said, arms folded, leaning against the door.
“I wanted to tell you every single day.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“It’s not just my secret, Marie. This is Jack’s life, and regardless of our relationship, he’s an excellent teacher.”
“Look, I get that he’s been able to face off with Connor and Rachel’s parents. I was even hoping that we’d get to see a parent showdown, but that didn’t happen. Still, he’s older than you.”
“I know.”
“And that rings a lot of alarm bells inside my head, so you’re going to have to start at the beginning with all this.”
“Afterward if I’ve convinced you nothing is wrong and that it’s all perfectly safe?”
“Then I won’t force you to go and report his ass. Believe me, Lucia, you’ve got to convince me.”
Lucia started at the beginning, from their innocent car rides up to the kiss, then to the birthday sexathon, and beyond that. What happened on Halloween night, even down to the Thanksgiving where nothing happened between them but he took care of her.
“You love him?”
“Yes.”
“Does he know?”
She shook her head.
“Wow, that is … pretty intense,” Marie said.
“I wanted to tell you. I hated lying to you, but I didn’t see any other way.”
“I get it. I don’t like it. I don’t like that you even felt you had to lie, but I do get it.” Marie looked down at the cell phone, and then held it out. “Here you go.”
“You’re not going to … report this?”
“No. I’m not going to report your salacious relationship with our teacher. It doesn’t sound the least bit dirty or disturbing at all. In fact, I think he could love you too.”
“You think so?”
“He’s taken care of you. Held your head as you’ve been sick, cleaned up after you. If this was just about the dirty, hot sex, he wouldn’t have flown all the way home to take care of you. No offense.”
“None taken.”
“No, I think it’s safe to say that Mr. Parker is in love with you.”
“I don’t know if it goes that far.”
Marie chuckled. “You were always the negative one. Since we’re sharing, I’m going to tell you that I lost my V-card over Thanksgiving.”
Lucia gasped. “What? You did?”
“Yep, to a ranch hand. You know my Grandma owns a big ranch down in Texas. Well, he was there to help out his father, and one thing led to another, and we did it outside in one of the barns. Not quite that romantic, but it was a lot of fun.”
“Have you heard from him since?”
“He texts from time to time, but he also moves around a lot with his dad so I don’t see anything coming from it. It made Thanksgiving a lot of fun though.”
“And you didn’t tell me.”
“Let’s not argue about who told each other what. If I’d not seen your cell phone, I wouldn’t know either.”
“I know, and I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry too,” Marie said. “Who would have thought it though? Lucia Deen, one of the sweetest girls in high school, screwing the English teacher. It’s kind of sordid.”
“Stop it.”
“It would make a wicked porn film.”
“Now you’re being gross. I did watch them though,” Lucia said, lying back on the floor like Marie had done. They stared up at her ceiling.
“What?”
“Watched porn. I wanted to see if it was different being with an older guy.”
“And is it?” Marie asked.
Lucia burst out laughing. “I have no idea. I’ve got nothing to compare it to, not that I want to or anything. I love being with Jack.”
“Oh, Jack.”
“Shut up,” Lucia turned her head, looking at Marie. “Do you forgive me?”
“Always. You know I can’t stay mad at you.” They held hands, and Lucia smiled. It would be okay. She had her best friend still, so everything would be more than fine.
“Psst,” Marie said.
“What?”
“You’re into old dudes.”
Lucia laughed. “And you think I’m the weird one.”