I woke up early and rushed into the shower. I wanted to have plenty of time to get ready. On a good day, I changed my outfit twice so that didn’t take too much time. On a day like today, without Violet’s advice, there was no telling how long it was going to take.
After the shower, I stood in front of my closet and had no idea what to wear. After three outfit fails, I grabbed my phone and video called Christie.
“Everything okay?” she asked through a yawn, eyes not entirely focused yet.
“No.” I told her about my hints but left out the dirty talk, though she probably would be pretty proud of my attempts. I’d tell her about it later when I wasn’t in a time crunch.
“All right, so, black skinny jeans, a red blouse or sweater, and brown riding boots. The red will be Christmasy, the boots will be comfortable, and the skinny jeans will make your ass look great,” she rattled off.
“Thanks. Hold on, I’m gonna put it on. I have this pretty, off the shoulder red sweater with glittery silver thread throughout it. I have a black tank top I can put underneath it.”
“Sounds perfect.”
I grabbed my clothes and quickly got dressed. Then I took my phone and stood in front of the mirror. “What do you think?”
“Turn around so I can see that ass!”
I laughed and spun, bouncing my butt up and down for her.
“You look great,” she managed when she stopped laughing. “Don’t forget to tell me all about it. I’m so excited for you.”
“See you later!” I hung up and started on my hair. I liked it straight, like, really straight.
***
I was working on my make-up when he texted. Kingsley was going to drive in front of my dorm so I didn’t have to walk in the snow. He said he’d let me know when he was here.
After taking a few deep breaths, I quickly finished with my make-up and sent Violet a text that I was thinking of her. They’d decided not to go to the jail. The snow seemed like a good excuse and it would give the investigator a little more time. Besides, I really didn’t think Violet could handle it.
A few minutes later, Kingsley texted that he was waiting for me in the car. At first, I was a little flustered. Wasn’t the guy supposed to pick the girl up at her door? When he said he was going to let me know he was here, I thought he meant in front of my door. He knew which one it was. Then I shook the idea from my head. It was so cold and snowy outside, he probably didn’t want to deal with all that for, like, two seconds to come get me. Besides, I shouldn’t be nitpicking at these little things. He did plan this big date for us. At least I hoped it would be a big date. Maybe it was a mistake to set my expectations so high. It would be better to be pleasantly surprised.
I took a second before opening the main dorm door and tried to calm down. I was going to be excited no matter what we were doing. Except hiking…I definitely would not go hiking in this weather…or in any weather really.
When I opened the door, I was immediately hit by a rush of cold air. It was awful. I hurried to his SUV and quickly opened the door.
“Thanks for picking me up. It’s freezing.”
“No problem. I’m just glad it stopped snowing. The sun has started melting the snow but it isn’t going fast enough yet.”
“Yeah, um, is it safe for us to be out today?” I’d be so pissed if the weather ruined our date. Then again, it wouldn’t be the worst thing to spend the day curled up in bed with a movie. I’d lean against his warm, shirtless chest and he’d wrapped his strong arms against me as I breathed in the delicious scent of his cologne.
“Don’t worry about that,” he said, interrupting my thoughts. “I’ve got chains on the tires and I double checked the place. It’s still open.”
“What place?”
“You’re going to have to wait.”
“You’re no fun.” I pouted a little at him. I stuck my bottom lip out and fluttered my eyelashes. He started the engine and began to drive off.
“Oh, no, don’t you try that with me.”
“Try what? I’m not doing anything.” I tried to sound both innocent and sexy at the same time.
“Just relax, it’s about a half hour away so you should calm down a little.”
“So, how was your night?” I asked him, deciding to move on.
Kingsley got excited and broke into a tale about how he singlehandedly saved a family when their car got in an accident. The more he told the story, the more I realized he may have been exaggerating a little bit. But I thought it was cute. It wasn’t like he was lying. He was just embellishing the story to impress me. I was sure he really did help with the rescue, and to be honest, I was a little flattered that he wanted to astound me.
I continued to listen to his story, completely taken by how animatedly he talked. He just had this way about him that sucked me in. One day, he’d tell his kids the best bedtime stories.
My eyes grew wide as I panicked a little. Where had that thought come from? I couldn’t believe I was thinking of him like that. Shaking my head, I pushed those thoughts away and let him finish his story. By the time he was done, we were pulling into the parking lot of a giant building. It looked like a bubble in the middle of a field. I had no idea what it was nor any idea what we were going to be doing there. But at least it didn’t look like we would be braving the elements, so that was a plus.
“I still don’t understand what we’re doing here,” I told him when he put the Range Rover in park.
“I know.” Kingsley leaned over me to reach into the glove compartment. He pulled out a red blindfold and winked at me. “Do you trust me?”
“Um, why?”
“Because I want you to be really surprised. Now, turn your head so I can put the blindfold on you.”
“We really don’t have to. I can just close my eyes. I promise I won’t peek,” I insisted.
Kingsley raised his eyebrows at me and tilted his head in judgment. “We both know you’ll cheat and ruin the surprise.”
“Fine,” I said, succumbing to him. I turned my head and he placed the blindfold over my eyes.
“Okay, turn back and let me know if you see anything.”
“No, I can’t—”
He quickly cut me off with a kiss. He held the back of my neck and pulled me closer to him. At first, I didn’t like the sensation. I had no idea what was going to happen next and I was positive that I was going to fall off the seat and break the gear shift. But Kingsley held me down and slowly lowered the seat a few inches.
I was almost laying down while he was leaning on top of me. His hand started moving up my body and the anticipation made me squirm. Then he stopped kissing me and gently blew in my ear. His hands were now suddenly on my hips. Everything he did was slow and deliberate. Kingsley didn’t slide his hands over me, but rather placed them as he felt my body. I didn’t know where he was going to touch next, where he was going to kiss next, what he would do with his tongue, and I was even more aroused than normal.
The other times he had touched me were nothing like this. Before, my pulse was racing because I was nervous I’d do something wrong, but here, in the middle of a random parking lot, with a blindfold on, it felt like I could just let all of my inhibitions go. I couldn’t do anything wrong, because Kingsley was in control. It was like my brain was shut off and it was the best feeling in the world. Nothing else mattered as it was just the two of us.
Then it stopped. “Whoa there. Sorry, seeing you in a blindfold distracted me for a second. This isn’t our date.”
“Well, what is?” I was a little disappointed, but I figured I could keep the blindfold for later.
“Come on, I’ll help you out of the car.”
“How about I take the blindfold off to get out of the car, and then you can put it back on?”
“Don’t you trust me, Annabelle?”
I took a deep breath and nodded. “I trust you.”
“Good,” he whispered in my ear.
I heard his door slam and a minute or so later I heard my door open. He grabbed my hand and turned me slowly. Before I knew it, I was up in the air, Kingsley lifting me out of my seat. Frankly, I was way too clumsy to try to get out of the SUV blindfolded, so I was glad he was looking out for me. He was getting to know me pretty well.
Kingsley held my hand tight with one hand and had the other wrapped around my waist. I felt safe in his arms. After all, he was a firefighter.
“Okay, I’m gonna open the door,” he instructed after a few minutes of walking. “When you step inside, you can take the blindfold off.”
I nodded, almost too excited to speak. I felt a rush of warm air finally hit my face, and I assumed he opened the door. Then his hand returned to my waist as he led me inside.
“All right, take the blindfold off,” he chanted as he pulled me to the right.
I yanked it off and my mouth fell open at what I saw.
We were in a massive room. It looked like a gymnasium without the basketball hoops or the stands. In their place was a winter wonderland. There were giant Santa statues everywhere and each one had a different type of suit, elaborate carvings, and bright colors. The Christmas tree in the center was massive and the ornaments were the size of my hand. Snowflakes about three feet tall hung on the walls and glistened in the sparkling lights that were draped over anything that stood still. But the best part was the carnival rides. I loved amusement parks and Kingsley had remembered I’d said that on our first date.
“This is the most amazing place I’ve ever seen,” I whispered in awe as my head swiveled from side to side.
“There are no other amusement parks near here that are open in January. This place is actually open year round. They change the decorations for the season. We hit Carmine’s Winter Wonderland’s last week. They’re about to turn it into a Valentine’s Day festival.” Kingsley took my hand and kissed my knuckles.
I looked down at our linked hands and then back up into those beautiful eyes. “It’s perfect. Which ride should we go on first?” I asked as I zoned in on the Tilt-A-Whirl. It was my favorite.
“Why don’t you look around and I’ll go get the wristbands we need to go on the rides? I’ll be right back.”
“Thanks.” I wondered off and headed to one of the display boards.
Santa Claus has been around for thousands of years. But it isn’t his longevity that makes him so legendary. Nor is it the effect he has on children. We can all admit it is beautiful to see a child light up when they open up a gift marked “With Love, From Santa,” but it is the effect he has on adults that is captivating. Santa has the ability to take an adult and remind them of beautiful memories from their past, instill them with hope, and reignite the child within so many of us forget about. As you walk around the festival, try to keep the spirit of Santa in your heart.
I smiled as memories of my childhood did flash through my mind. I remembered sneaking down the stairs to try to catch a glimpse of Santa. Instead, I saw my parents cuddled up on the couch. There was a roaring fire and their laughter filled the air. It was a beautiful moment, and even as a small child I recognized the love in their eyes. My dad traveled a lot for work and it was rough on my mom. However, it was the little moments like this that reminded me how much they cared for each other. The funny thing was they got married two months after they first met. My dad proposed three weeks in because he knew she was the one for him.
Kingsley and I had been seeing each other for a week. As he walked over to me, I couldn’t help but wonder if he was the guy for me. He rushed the rest of the way to me, a smile plastered on his face and a glisten in his eye. I sighed as tingles spread through my system. I didn’t know if we would be getting married anytime soon, but I did know he was beginning to matter to me. I just hoped he felt the same way. If I had to guess, I’d say that look in his eyes wasn’t one he flashed at everyone.
“So, what first?” he asked.
“Tilt-A-Whirl, it’s my favorite.”
“Eh, I’m not a big fan of that. Why don’t we head to the Ferris Wheel? We can look over everything and kind of take it in. Then we can plan out the rest of the day. Besides, I know how much you like to take pictures, you can probably get some good shots up there.” Kingsley gave my hand a little kiss and pulled me over to the Ferris Wheel line.
I was a little sad because there wasn’t a line for the Tilt-A-Whirl while the line for the Ferris Wheel was crazy, but this was Kingsley’s show, so I wanted to please him. There would be time for the Tilt-A-Whirl later.
We got in line and began to wait our turn. “Are you a big Christmas fan?” I asked.
“Yeah, my parents always make a big deal about it. They throw this massive party every year with, like, two hundred people in attendance. I’ve been going to that party since I was able to walk. It’s a lot of fun and I usually invite a bunch of friends. We steal some booze, maybe something a little harder, and find a spot away from the parents.”
My face fell a little. Did he say something harder? Maybe Kyle had a point. I forced a smile and leaned into him so that I could whisper in his ear. “So, you actually do use drugs?”
Kingsley gave me a little wink. “Well, sometimes we like to have a little fun, but nothing like what an addict would be in to.”
I looked at him a little differently. Was he a user? Did I just get in the car with a drug abuser? This was freaking perfect. I finally found a guy I could really see myself with and who knew what he was in to.
“What do you do? Heroin or cocaine or something?”
He chuckled a second and shook his head. “No, sometimes I take some pills. It’s not a big deal.”
“Are you on them now?” My heart was racing. What if he had the pills with him? He’d mentioned needing them for his migraine but maybe that wasn’t it. Could he have been lying to me? What if the cops found out? Would I go to jail too? I could definitely not go to jail. I wouldn’t last a couple hours behind bars.
“No, relax. I did some pot in high school but I don’t really do that anymore. Only when I’m crazy stressed, and I haven’t needed to do that since I met you.” He smiled, stroking my cheek lightly.
“Is that it?” I knew a lot of people did pot, and, yeah, it was wrong, but I could live with that, especially if he didn’t do it while we were together. Maybe I could change him.
“Well, sometimes I take a Ritalin when I need a little extra energy. When I’m heading to a fire, I’ll pop one to increase my focus. If I didn’t take it, I could miss someone. Do you have any idea how dark it is in a fire? It’s not like I can just turn my cell phone flashlight on. I’m just trying to be a better firefighter. Don’t you want that?”
“Well, when you put it that way…” I was trying to be supportive, but I didn’t think I sounded convincing.
“Exactly. I only want to be a better firefighter. Yeah, I made some mistakes when I was younger and I used stuff I shouldn’t have, but I know better now. You know me, I’m not an addict.” He sounded so self-assured and inspiring. I didn’t like that he was using pills, but it was just Ritalin. It wasn’t like he was using anything too rough. People used that on a regular basis when they needed to focus in school.
“Right, I didn’t think you were but—”
“Next,” the guy at the front of the line called to us.
I gave him a soft smile and Kingsley took my hand to help me into the car.
“Look, it kind of slipped out,” Kingsley said, shrugging his shoulders. “I didn’t want you to get upset. We’re here and it would be a shame to waste all of this.” He waved his arm in the air and sighed heavily. Then he leaned his forearms on his knees and looked up at me through his impossibly thick lashes. “Okay, the pills aren’t a big deal to me. I’m already a pretty kick ass firefighter, so I can stop them if you want me to. I won’t have the edge anymore, but I don’t think it will have that much of an impact on me. If it matters to you, I’ll stop, because that’s how much I am beginning to care about you.”
I took his hand and closed my eyes for a second. “Do you really think it helps you? Don’t people use it to get high?”
“Is that what you think I’m doing? Do you think I would risk it if I didn’t think it made me better? It’s not about the way it makes me feel, it’s about what it can make me do.”
“Just please don’t do it around me. I don’t want to get caught with them and I really don’t want to be around people when they’re doing it.”
“Done! Now, let’s enjoy this.” Kingsley quickly hopped from his seat across from me and moved to my side. He wrapped his arm around my neck and reached for my chin with his other hand. Gently, he pulled my face close to his and gave me a kiss. It was sweet, tender, and almost loving.
When he let go, my eyes stayed closed for a moment or two longer as I tried to settle the intense effect those lips had on me.
“You are so beautiful.”
I looked down and blushed bright red. I still wasn’t used to being called that, and definitely not while sitting this close to someone who really meant it.
“I’ve been trying to think of the best time to ask this since that first night we hung out. Looking out at this festival, there is no one else I’d rather share it with than you. So, Annabelle, I think it’s time we become official.”
“Do you mean it?” I felt a warmth flow through me as I became unbelievably giddy. The frustration of the drug use quickly subsided at the thoughts of a future with him. I’d help him see he didn’t need the drugs anymore and he’d be the man I wanted him to be.
“Yes, I want to be with you and only you. Hell, I don’t even want you looking at another guy when I’m around. Golfing with Jason was killing me. I don’t share with anyone.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about Jason. He has a girlfriend, and I don’t want you to share. I would love to be exclusive.”
Kingsley grabbed the back of my neck with both hands and pulled me into a rough and passionate kiss. “Uh, I was so nervous.”
“You don’t have any reason to be nervous. Don’t you see how happy you make me?”
“Yeah, and I also see how Jason’s gaze lingers a little too long on you. He may have a girlfriend, but she isn’t the only one he’s thinking about.” Kingsley slid away from me a few inches and dropped his hands in his lap. His brow was creased and I saw a slight tick in his jaw. He looked upset.
I slid over to him and placed a hand on the side of his face, moving it slightly so that he had to look at me. “Listen to me, you’re not the first person to think he has feelings for me. But you’re wrong. He is in love with his girlfriend. Besides that, I don’t feel that way about him. You’re the one I want to be with.” I tried to sound as sure as possible. It was only a little lie. Obviously, I did have some feelings for Jason, but I almost never thought of him when I was with Kingsley. He really was the one I wanted to be with. I just hoped Kingsley believed me.
He leaned his face into my hand and nuzzled it lightly. “I believe you, but I’d still feel better if you two didn’t spend any alone time together.”
I laughed too loud and it was a little obnoxious. “You don’t have to worry about that. Jason, Violet, and I get a lot of crap because the three of us rarely go anywhere apart. And lately, Jason and I haven’t been seeing eye to eye on things so it won’t be an issue.”
“You have no idea how good that makes me feel. I’m glad you agree.” Kingsley kissed me again but quickly let go. We had made the full circle and it was time to get off the Ferris Wheel. He quickly jumped out and then extended his hand. Thrilled at what a constant gentleman he was, I placed my hand in his and walked a little taller back into the festival.
“What now?” I asked as we started to walk around. But Kingsley didn’t get a chance to answer. A band took the stage and we heard the sounds of “I’ll Be Home for Christmas.” “Aww, I love this song,” I told Kingsley as I walked over to the stage. There were four people on the stage, a singer, a drummer, a guitarist, and a piano man. But only the singer and pianist were in the spotlight. She sounded so amazing and my hand flew to my mouth as I took it in.
Kingsley quickly spun me around so that I was facing him. “Dance with me.”
I bit my lip as a giant smile spread across my face. This would be my first slow dance with a guy. Well, second if you counted homecoming with Kyle. I didn’t, since we didn’t have those feelings for each other. I nodded and Kingsley took me in his arms.
We twirled in a small circle with his hands on my lower back and my arms wrapped around his strong neck. Then, when I thought the moment couldn’t get any more perfect, Kingsley pulled me closer and began to sing along softly in my ear. He had a rich baritone voice and was actually pretty good. I closed my eyes and leaned against his chest. This would rank as one of the best moments of my life.
As the song ended and we separated, I was actually really disappointed. Kingsley seemed to recognize it. He gave me another soft kiss and then whispered in my ear, “Don’t worry, babe. This won’t be our last dance.”
“Good.”
We spent the rest of the day going on the rides. However, the Tilt-A-Whirl had broken down, so we didn’t get to go on it. Kingsley insisted this was a good thing and that I should definitely pick a new favorite ride. I was actually thinking the Ferris Wheel might be a good replacement.
Kingsley and I were heading to get a late lunch when his cell phone rang. He made a few grunting and agreement noises and then hung up. “Sorry, babe, I have to check out early. They need me to be on call for the night and I don’t want to have to ditch you if I have to go in.”
“No, that’s totally okay. I have to get back and check on Violet anyway.”
“Are you sure you want to be hanging out with her? I really am worried all of her drama is going to put you at risk.”
“I appreciate your concern, but I have a feeling the drama is going to be ending soon. She has a private investigator working to resolve all of this.” I tried to be hopeful but I was just as nervous as he seemed to be. But then again, I tended to worry a lot.
Kingsley dropped me off at the dorms and I rushed to Violet’s room. I knew there was a chance she was with Berneli, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to look.
As it turned out, she wasn’t there. I grabbed my phone and gave her a call.
Violet answered but I could barely understand her through the tears.
“Just tell me where you are. I’m coming there.”
She managed to say that she was with Berneli and begged me to bring Jason. I wanted to tell her that Kingsley would be pissed if I was in the car alone with him, but Violet needed us. Kingsley was becoming important to me, but Violet already was.
I took a deep breath and texted Jason. I told him Violet needed us and I’d be picking him up in five minutes. I quickly changed into leggings and a comfy sweater. Then it was off to break my promise to my boyfriend and to make my best friend feel better. After all, hoes before bros.
Jason had insisted on driving, something about doubting my abilities while the roads still had snow on them, so I grumbled as I climbed into the front seat of his car. I was not a fan of this cocky attitude.
“Do you have any idea what’s going on? I thought she was seeing Finn.” Jason asked me as he pointed the car toward Berneli’s apartment. He had the address in his GPS. I realized he probably had never been there before, since the other day was my first time.
“No, she decided not to because of all the snow. Plus, she mentioned the investigator figured something out. When she called, she was too upset to speak. I was hoping Berneli would cut in, but nothing.” I looked down at my fingernails and tried to busy myself with the chipped polish.
He pulled into a spot in front of the apartment complex. Someone must have just plowed because the spots were mostly free. Considering I didn’t have a shovel, or even gloves, I was definitely glad for that. Then the thought of Kingsley plowing the street outside Christie’s house crossed my mind. A rush of guilt washed over me and I quickly reached for the door handle to get out of the car. But Jason reached out and held my arm gently.
“Just wait a second, I want to talk to you about something.” He loosened his grip on my arm and ran the back of his knuckles over his face.
I looked straight ahead at the windows to the lobby and tried not to meet his intense stare. Kingsley had been so good to me, and here I was going against his wishes. He deserved better than me. I really should get out of the car; it wasn’t like Jason and I were on the best terms anyway. Yet something had me pinned to my seat. I needed to know what he was going to say.
“Listen, I owe you an apology. I judged Kingsley too harshly and said some nasty things to you. It’s not my place to say anything about your relationship.”
We were silent for a few seconds and I turned to look at him. Jason gave me a weak smile and his dimples started to appear. My breath caught in my throat and I tried to contain the tears that were fighting to come out. Truth be told, I’d missed him and how easy it was for the three of us to be together.
“I also said some things I shouldn’t have. I didn’t mean to criticize you and Janice,” I replied, trying to smile back at him.
“Thanks. I’m glad we can move past this. I think Vi will need us at our best.” Jason opened his door and got out. He was right, we needed to get it together so we could be there for Violet. Her problems were much bigger than the petty crap Jason and I were fighting about.
As I exited the car, I started to slip. I tried to grab the door to keep myself upright but it was slick with snow and I couldn’t get a grip. I closed my eyes tight and braced for impact. But it never came. Confused, I opened my eyes and looked up into the light blue eyes of Jason. He had walked around to my side of the car, apparently to help my clumsy ass. Now he was holding me in a dip with a playful look on his face.
He didn’t pull me up straight away. Instead, I hung there as we just looked at each other. It was different from when Kingsley looked at me. I felt adored and special whenever he stared deep into my eyes. But with Jason, I felt a little confused and maybe a little uncomfortable. Something in me stirred and I didn’t know how I felt about it. Maybe it was like the feeling you got going up a giant hill on a rollercoaster. Some people really liked that feeling of anticipation while others dreaded it. The jury was currently out as to which group I was in.
“It’s a good thing I didn’t trust you to walk on your own. We might be on the way to the hospital,” Jason teased as he finally pulled me to my feet.
“It’s your parking job,” I insisted, walking slowly on the sidewalk to the entrance of the apartment building. “You parked right next to a giant pile of snow. I bet you did it on purpose.”
“Obviously, I really wanted to see you wipe out.”
“Then why did you catch me?”
“I guess I don’t like being the bad guy.”
“I figured as much,” I said, and took Jason’s extended hand. He clearly didn’t trust me to make it inside on my own. Frankly, he was probably right. These were new boots that I’d gotten for Christmas and I definitely should have scuffed up the soles a little before I wore them. I just wasn’t getting any traction.
We walked the rest of the way in silence as I tried to ignore the return of the rollercoaster feeling in my stomach. His hand was warm and seemed to radiate heat up my arm and straight through my soul.
An attendant opened the lobby door for us and we walked in. It wasn’t until we were entering the elevator that I realized we were still holding hands. I thought about letting go. It was on my mind the entire ride up to Berneli’s floor. But for some reason, I couldn’t get my hand to cooperate. I kept hoping Jason would let go on his own and I wouldn’t have to worry about my decreased motor function.
Finally, as the elevator opened, Jason released my hand and let me exit before him. I walked quickly to the apartment, desperate to be in mixed company. I shouldn’t be alone with him. I didn’t even know where that came from. It wasn’t something we’d done before…well, except at that hockey game.
I knocked on Berneli’s door and he was quick to answer. “Hey, guys, come on in.”
I almost ran in and saw Violet, a puffy mess of tissues and snot, balling her eyes out on the couch. “Oh, honey. What the hell is going on?” I asked, rushing to her side.
She tried to speak but was quickly taken over by a plague of hiccups. She grabbed a used tissue and tried to wipe her face. Jason grabbed some paper towels from the kitchen and handed them to Violet, sitting on her other side.
“Vi, take a deep breath. What’s going on?”
She attempted to speak again but the hiccups worsened. Jason and Berneli both gave her a sympathetic look as Berneli leaned over the back of the couch and slowly massaged her shoulders.
I needed to break her out of this and get her to talk, and it seemed there would only be one way to do it. I stood up and looked down at Violet. “Enough,” I shouted at her. “Get it together. We can’t help you if you don’t calm down. All you’re doing right now is getting snot all over this beautiful couch and Jason’s shoulder. That’s gross and really unnecessary.”
“Annabelle,” Jason scolded, trying to stop my outburst.
“No, Jason. This isn’t helping anyone. Tell us what’s going on so we can fix it. Once we know what’s up, then you can go back to the blubbery mess, okay?” I said.
Violet looked up at me, a little shell-shocked. Her eyes were wide and her eyebrows were raised so high I could hardly tell the difference between them and her hairline. But she nodded and took a few deep breaths.
“Trent visited me with a message from Finn.”