‘I’ve finished the training.’ Nick tried hard not to scrutinise her reaction too much.

Jenna looked as unsure about him being here as he felt. But hell, the minute her address had popped up on his radar, there was no way he was going to let anyone else take the call out. He’d had to make sure she was okay. That damned protection streak kept coming and coming, and he was too caught up to ignore it.

So, yes, she was safe. He could relax—as best he could whenever he was around her.

She looked good. Hot, red-faced, her bluest of blue eyes shining bright, her hair wayward. Better than good, which wasn’t helping anything to be honest, least of all him trying to forget the kiss. The memory of which had kept him awake. A lot.

Still, she hadn’t been hurt and she’d kept her sense of humour. ‘And good morning to you both. Another call out, Jenna? Didn’t I say I never wanted to see you at another crime scene? Should I just set up your own direct line straight to the station?’

Blue eyes blazed. ‘Hey, we nearly caught your burglar. So, yes, set one up. But watch it, you’ll be out of a job if you’re not careful, especially if I get Mrs Singh in on the act too.’

‘Anjini Singh? Is she the same as your Mrs Singh at the shop opening?’

‘Yes.’ Curiosity flickered across Jenna’s face. ‘Do you know her?’

‘She’s legendary at the station. No one knows how she does it, but she always seems to be one step ahead of everyone else.’ Why were they talking about Mrs Singh? All he could focus on was the mouth he’d crushed his lips against. Kissed like a starving man being fed. Took from her what wasn’t rightfully his, but took it anyway.

Damn his pathetic resolve.

Damn the kiss.

No, not damn the kiss. The kiss had been the best thing that had happened to him in years. It was the fallout that was bothering him.

‘Ahem.’ The other woman’s voice zoned into his memories. ‘Er, if we’re not going to talk about the break-in, could I ask a quick question? Nick?’

Hell. He couldn’t remember this woman’s name. There had been a lot of them at the shop opening, but his focus hadn’t been on the others. It had been wholly on Jenna. Right now, he could recall every minute detail about her that day. The dress that cinched her waist. The curl of her hair on the top of her head. The swish of black eyeliner that fanned out, making her look like Audrey Hepburn. The purple icing he’d wanted to lick off her face but only after he’d kissed her hard on her red glossy-lipped mouth.

It was as if his radar was fine-tuned to only her.

What the hell was her name? Sas… something? Kit? Kat? Or was she… nah, he couldn’t remember. But she was here, which meant there was a human shield between him and Jenna, that kiss, and the question of how they were supposed to act now. ‘Sure. Fire away. Then I will talk about the break-in.’

The short-haired woman looked angry. ‘Can you stop someone opening a business in direct competition with yours?’

‘No. I don’t think so. Why?’

She started to point fiercely out of the window. ‘Someone’s opening a drinking house there. Right there. And it’ll be all shiny and new and all my regulars will want to go in there instead of The Duke.’

He wouldn’t blame them if she was always this animated; people tended to want peace and quiet when they went to the pub. But her business was clearly important to her; she was trying to make a living and feeling threatened. Plus, she was Jenna’s friend, and he trusted her judgement in choosing those she kept in her close-knit circle. ‘I don’t think he’s breaking any laws.’

‘No. Just my poor heart.’

‘Oh, come on, stop overreacting,’ Jenna interjected. ‘You’re made of sturdier stuff, Faith.’

‘I know. And he’s going to get a taste of my sturdy next time he’s around here.’ Faith. Faith, that was it. Faith didn’t look convinced. ‘This is all I bloody need, more reasons for people to stop coming into my pub. Right, I’d better get back to sprucing up my business. At least forewarned is forearmed. I’ll leave you two to it.’

‘Wait. Don’t you want to stay for a coffee?’ Jenna’s eyes were pleading with her friend. So, she didn’t want to have to face being on her own with him and the gaping hole between them. That made two of them.

Faith picked up two plates and cups and walked to the door. ‘I have things to do. Like looking up trading rules on the council website. There must be a bylaw or something I can invoke to stop him.’

Then she was gone.

For a few moments, there was just an awkward silence, and the memory of the kiss seemed to hang around them. No words, just a strange, weird feeling in his chest that made him want to get the hell out, and yet tug her into his arms at the same time. This was so unlike him. He’d faced down insurgents with less anxiety.

Jenna wrung her hands together and laughed. ‘Poor guy. Once Faith gets a bee in her bonnet, there’s no stopping her.’

‘I know someone else like that too.’

‘Who?’ Her eyes widened. She pressed her palm against her chest, and he wished she hadn’t because his eyes zeroed in right there. She was wearing a black T-shirt with a wreath of flowers in yellows and golds on it. The petals fanned out over her breasts and seemed to reflect light onto her face, like holding buttercups under the chin—some silly game he’d played when he was a kid. Her legs were wrapped in black Lycra that accentuated her curves. He’d never seen her looking so damned sexy. Blinking, she smiled. ‘Me?’

‘Of course you.’ He decided to cloak the conversation in work-related things. He flicked open his black notepad and started to walk around the shop. ‘Okay. So tell me what happened.’

‘Oh yes. My statement.’

He laughed. ‘Not really a statement as such. Just facts about what happened. What time… that kind of thing. You do watch a lot of cop shows.’

She brightened. ‘I told you, Netflix and chocolate are my two best friends. Right. Facts. We were all running in the running club—’

‘You signed up for it?’ After he’d seen her running the other day, he’d thought she’d flat-out refuse to join the club. She didn’t exactly look like a natural runner or as if she enjoyed any part of it.

‘I set up my own club.’

‘Of course you did.’ No easy route for Jenna. She always rose to a challenge, like right now. She was fired up, her eyes light and bright like a summer sky.

Damn. He was thinking in poetry. What the hell was happening to his head?

But he knew what was happening. Jenna was happening.

He wanted to run his hands over her. To back her up against the counter and slip his palms under that T-shirt. To feel her skin underneath his.

To be inside her.

Damn. Man the hell up.

He shouldn’t have come here. He should have passed the job to someone else, to someone who could be objective, who would be listening to her instead of imagining how she would feel around him. Wondering how he could be so attracted to someone that it made him doubt his sanity.

But she was still well into the conversation. Just like he should have been, instead of mooning over something he couldn’t have. ‘Well the book group didn’t want to run with runners, and trust me, I absolutely agree on that front.’

‘You did fine with me.’ They both knew she didn’t.

‘No, actually, I nearly died. I just pretended I could keep up to impress you.’ She had nothing to gain by admitting this. It was just Jenna being self-deprecating, as usual. Refreshing. She relayed the details of earlier that morning. The suspect fit the description of a similar break-in yesterday. He was getting lazy. One day soon he’d be caught. She pointed to the glass on the floor. ‘Do you need to dust for fingerprints or anything?’

‘I’ll radio in and see what the boss says. There’ve been a few of these now, so I imagine he’ll say not to waste resources.’

‘But then you might never find the perp.’

He laughed. ‘The what?’

She was all earnest and fired up. ‘Perpetrator. I know the lingo; I watch Lewis.’

‘I don’t know why the Met bothers with all that expensive training for its coppers when we have all these experts in our midst.’

‘Glad you think I’m funny.’

She laughed along too, and it was so good to see, unlike last time. He loved to see her like this, loved to make her laugh. He should be doing more of that instead of trying to kiss her. That laugh was precious, and he didn’t want to lose it from his life. Anything more was off limits. ‘You are, Jenna. You are very good value.’

Suddenly the laughter stopped and her eyes darkened and he couldn’t help asking, ‘Hey, are we… are things okay? I’m sorry about the other night. I shouldn’t have….’

The laugh fizzled out and she nodded. ‘It’s okay. Let’s say the word. We kissed and we stepped over a line. I hope it doesn’t mean we can’t still be friends?’

‘Absolutely. Friends is where we should be.’

She exhaled long and deep. ‘Great. So no more Mr Grumpy?’

‘No. I wasn’t grumpy. I was angry with myself for being weak and giving in to base needs rather than fighting them.’

She blinked. ‘Base needs? Aha. Very clinical.’

Nowhere near it. Clinical was what he wanted, what he expected from himself, but he was a long way from achieving it, especially when he was around her. It was as if she bewitched him with her laugh and her bluest eyes and easy smile. He fought every moment not to touch her, to tell her what was going on his head—how things were changing and he couldn’t stop them no matter how hard he tried. ‘I’m trying to put them out there, the feelings and stuff.’ He pointed into the space in front of them. Gah, he was so bad at this, but he had to say it out loud to keep her at arm’s length along with those feelings. ‘So I can deal with them there and not in here.’ He touched his head. His heart. Then he grinned as he pointed lower. Much lower. ‘Here, this is most of the problem.’

She looked at his groin and then back at his face and couldn’t help laughing again. ‘Problem? You have a problem there?’

Whoa. Not quite what he intended. ‘No. I have no problems there, trust me. I just don’t want it interfering with clear thought processes. And I definitely don’t want it interfering with my friendships. You deserve more than what I can give you, a whole lot more than me.’

She shook her head. ‘Actually, you’re pretty decent. And if I was in the market for a guy, which I’m not, I’d be looking for someone just like you.’

If she only knew him, how he’d had his heart ripped out and tossed aside and wasn’t sure there was anything left of it. How he just wasn’t ever going to go there again. Not even with her. Because he’d learned the hard way that giving someone your trust was the biggest mistake you could make.

He looked at the shards of glass on the floor and then his radio blared with a crackly voice. Work. He was here for work. ‘Sorry. This isn’t really the—’

‘Time or place? Yeah, you keep saying that.’ Her smile slipped. ‘I mean, when is the right time to actually have a decent bloody chat with a mate about what’s going on in your life?’

‘Without wanting to… kiss them?’ He didn’t feel regretful about it, just disappointed in himself. And shit, yes, he wanted to do it again.

‘You said the word. There. Not too hard really?’ She tapped her fingers on the counter and grinned. ‘Oh, Nick, I’m so glad we can talk about this. Let’s put it behind us. Forget it happened.’

No way would he ever forget. ‘I’m sure we can. We were there for each other for so long. I don’t want to lose you as a friend. It’d be good if we could get that back on track.’

‘You know what? How about we try again? How about we have a relaxed dinner together some time next week? Just as friends. Thursday’s good because Mum’s out then. Actually, she’s going on a cruise, so she won’t be back until Sunday.’

‘You okay with that? Us two. Alone?’ He wasn’t sure if he was.

‘We’re two grown people. We can certainly control our base needs.’ She smirked. ‘I can tell you about the running club. And you can tell me what’s happening about finding the burglar. What’s more, I’ll cook. I owe you food. But you may need to bring indigestion tablets for afterwards.’

He mentally scrolled through his diary. Thursday rang a bell. ‘Ah. No. Just remembered. Can’t make it.’

Her forehead crinkled. ‘Oh. My cooking’s not that bad. Honestly.’

‘I have my passing out ceremony that day.’

‘Oh, I’ve heard about those. The Lord Mayor gives a speech and everything, very swish. I hope you’ve been practising your marching.’

Really? ‘Jenna, I was a soldier for a very long time. I’m king of marching, okay?’

She looked at his legs, then higher up. Smiled. ‘I imagine you are.’

‘Why don’t you come? My guest?’ The words were out before he could check himself. But it was a harmless enough thing, wasn’t it? Just some time together… oh, and with about a hundred or so other recruits, plus trainers, families. Nothing could happen except a deepening of the friendship they both valued so much.

Her cheeks had coloured. ‘Y-you want me to come to the ceremony?’

‘Yes, Jenna. I want you to come to the ceremony.’ He did. More than anything. ‘It’s at Hendon, but I’ll have to get there early, so you’d have to make your own way there. Problem?’

‘Not a problem at all. I’ll talk to Chloe, see if she can mind the shop and have Evie. Not a date, though?’

‘No. Definitely not a date.’ If he said it often enough, he might even believe it.

Jenna exhaled slowly and repeated, ‘Good. Not a date.’

Even though it felt distinctly like one.

---

---

‘You want me to babysit while you go on a date with Nick? Sure. But you have to promise to tell me everything. And I mean everything.’ It was their first time off together in weeks. Mum had taken Evie to church, and the shop wasn’t opening until ten. So, Chloe and Jenna were catching up for an early breakfast in a tiny, steamy cafe just off Notting Hill Gate.

Although, Jenna wished she wasn’t, given she was being given the third degree by her big sister. ‘It is not a date.’

‘Honey, a gorgeous, single, heterosexual man has invited you to a ceremony celebrating his achievements. Whatever else you want to dress it up as, it’s a date.’ Chloe raised her hands as if to signal no further argument. Her decision was final.

It wasn’t. ‘A man and a woman can be friends without sexual attraction coming into it.’

Chloe took a gulp of her Americano. ‘Oh, that old conundrum. Yes, I’m sure a man and woman can be friends without sex. But not this particular man and woman. Come on, admit you want to. And don’t lie, I can see it in your eyes. In your whole body, Jen. You positively glow when his name’s mentioned. You should see yourself when he’s actually in the room. Cliché, I know, but you light up.’

Not what Jenna wanted to hear. ‘I do not glow, and I definitely don’t light up.’

‘Yes, you do. It’s lovely. I think you should give it a chance.’

‘Give what a chance? He said he doesn’t want me.’ Which was more confusing than ever, because clearly he did, otherwise he wouldn’t have kissed her in the first place. And the stupid thing about it was, Chloe was right. She couldn’t look at Nick without imagining things, sexual things. So many things….

‘How do you know until you try? He seems very keen whenever he’s around you.’

‘He told me he wasn’t good for me.’

Chloe’s cup clattered into the saucer and the crowded cafe fell silent. ‘Wow. You had that conversation. So things must have got to a situation where you needed to have it. What happened? Spill.’

‘No.’ Jenna lowered her voice, relieved when the other customers started to chat quietly too.

But if she didn’t actually say the words out loud, she was scared the kiss may just become a figment of her imagination rather than a memory. And deep inside her, the fizz intensified and she just had to blurt it out to someone. ‘We kissed.’

Chloe fist pumped the air. ‘I knew it! Yay.’

‘And then we stopped. Because… well, you know why, Chloe. So many reasons why. Evie. Ollie.’

Chloe blinked. ‘Don’t bring him into this. He’s dead, honey.’

‘Don’t you think I know that?’ Jenna couldn’t help snapping. ‘And what if I let myself fall for Nick and he… and he dies too? What then?’

Chloe wrapped her hand over her sister’s and squeezed. ‘You can’t go round thinking like that, Jenna. You can’t save everybody, and you can’t spend your life thinking every minute that they’re going to die. You’ll go mad. You’ll lose out on so much. We all have to take some risks or we’ll shrivel up and die, lonely and sad. Think about it. What about that phrase, better to have loved and lost than never having loved at all?’

‘You really are full of clichés today, aren’t you? I don’t love him, for a start. Plus, he said he wasn’t good for me.’ Trouble was, she definitely had feelings for him, and they weren’t going away.

‘But he kissed you?’

‘Aha. Come on, or we’ll be late to open the shop.’ In reality, they had more than enough time to meander down the hill, but she wasn’t sitting here having her life dissected. Jenna left some money for the bill next to her cup, gathered her bag and coat and hauled Chloe outside, hoping to steer her away from all subjects relating to kissing.

But Chloe wasn’t being steered anywhere. She slipped her arm into Jenna’s and walked her towards Holland and Barrett health food shop. They stood looking at the teapot display in the window, for no apparent reason other than that Chloe could ask more questions. ‘Was it a friendly non-sexual kiss on the cheek?’

‘No.’

‘An earth-moving kind of kiss?’

‘Oh, for goodness sake, Chloe. Please.’ Jenna turned to her sister. ‘It was a majorly fabulous, totally mind-blowing kiss, okay? Then we stopped and he said he was no good for me. Now stop talking about it.’

They started to meander again for a few moments in silence, and Jenna was just starting to relax when Chloe said, ‘So, he just said that to protect himself, and you. There’s hope. Definitely hope. Don’t you miss it?’

‘What?’

‘Everything.’

‘I think I preferred it when you were pissed off with men and dead set against love.’ Jenna sighed. Of course she missed it. More than she ever wanted to admit. She’d never be able to fill the hole Ollie had left—not just the Ollie bits, but the other things associated with having a life partner. Company. Support. She ran her fingers over her wedding ring and her heart dipped, because at some point she’d need to take it off. Wouldn’t she? At what point did you admit you weren’t half of something? She’d always felt as if she was still married to him, still connected, this gold band pinning them together. But now? Three years later? He wasn’t coming back. He was never coming back. He was dead and she had to keep on living, if she had the courage. She wasn’t sure she did.

‘I miss having someone to talk to, to laugh with. I miss the confidence of knowing I’m part of something bigger than just me. I miss having someone I can share decisions and moments with. I miss those little moments, you know, like the little kiss on the top of the head that says I love you, I care. The shared jokes. I miss someone cooking for me, with me, someone deciding what to cook. Someone asking about my day. Kissing. Yes, I like kissing. I’d forgotten about that until Thursday.’ And now she couldn’t get it out of her head. It was as if that kiss had blown life back into the sleeping part of her body.

‘And hot sex.’ Her sister nudged her in the ribs. ‘Don’t you miss that?’

‘I didn’t. But I do now, all of a sudden. But I’m not going to have sex with him. We had one kiss, and it’s not going to happen again, okay? We agreed.’ So, yes, it had been a huge mistake to confide in Chloe. ‘I’m never kissing anyone again. Or anything else. Ever.’

‘Okay.’ Chloe stopped walking and took Jenna by the shoulders. ‘Right. Here goes, big sister talk coming up. At some point, you will have sex with someone. It may not be Nick, it may not be for a few years, but you will have sex again, my darling girl, you will, I promise.’

Jenna shuddered. ‘I don’t want to. I mean, all that undressing in front of someone. Ugh. Holding in my stomach until I can’t talk, never mind breathe, faux-casually covering up my stretch marks and wobbly bits. Being scrutinised. Being compared to all the other lovely women in the world.’

Chloe hugged against her. ‘If he’s the right man for you, he won’t scrutinise or compare. He’ll love you for being you.’

‘Maybe with my clothes on, but naked?’

‘Sex does usually require having fewer clothes on than normal, yes. And often it happens between two people. Sometimes more.’

‘More? You have got to be joking. Having it with one person is hard to get my head around.’

‘Oh, honey. I do love you. But you’ve got to admit, doing it by yourself is a bit boring, right?’

Jenna’s mouth opened and closed. What the hell to say to that? ‘Hmmmmm.’

‘If you do decide to have sex, you’re going to need things. Women these days need to be prepared for any eventuality. Condoms. You need condoms.’

No. No. No. ‘I don’t. I’m not even going to have this conversation with you. I am not buying supplies I’m not going to use. What a waste of money.’

‘Look, there’s a sexy shop over there.’ Chloe pointed down a side street to a darkly lit shop with a bright neon sign overhead saying, ADULTS ONLY. ‘We could nip in and grab some condoms.’

‘No way. I am not walking into one of those shops.’ Please don’t be open on a Sunday morning.

‘Sex is meant to be fun, Jenna. There’s nothing wrong with getting some supplies to make things funner.’

‘Funner?’

Chloe shrugged. ‘Just made it up.’

‘I am not walking into that shop and looking someone in the eye and asking them for condoms. They’ll know what I want to do. That I am planning to… you know.’

‘Have sex? How the hell do you think they came into being in the first place? It’s a perfectly natural and normal thing to do.’

‘I’d rather die than speak to them. Honestly. I don’t want human connection. I just need some rubber.’ Did she? Wow, how had she got here?

What the hell?

But Chloe did have a point. Three years ago, the thought of ever having sex again would never have crossed Jenna’s mind. Three months ago even. Three weeks ago, possibly. But if there was the slightest chance she might, she needed supplies, because leaving all that up to a man was stupid and naive. She was a twenty-first century woman; she needed to take her sex life into her own hands.

As it were.

Just in case. For some time in the future, obviously. When she was ready. Not now. Not with Nick.

She was just being a responsible adult.

‘You little devil.’ Chloe had an I told you so kind of smile that Jenna wanted to wipe off her mouth. ‘Look, there’s a twenty-four-hour pharmacy over there. We can go in and use the self-service till. You won’t have to speak to anyone. No one will see you.’

‘No.’

‘So what will you do? Wait until you’re in the throes of passion and hope like hell he’s got some. Sure. That’s going to work. If you’re happy with that plan, then go for it. Personally, I think you’re playing with fire.’ Chloe hauled in a breath and grinned. ‘Worse-case scenario, what if neither of you have anything? Cross your fingers and do it anyway? Because sometimes you don’t want to cross your legs. I wouldn’t go with that as an option if I were you.’

Well, wow, one boyfriend later and Chloe had become Miss Sex Guru of the year. ‘Do not say another word. I’m dying here. Keep your head down and don’t stand near me, okay?’

What the hell was she even doing? She was about to waste her hard-earned cash on buying something she’d never use. But she followed her sister into the store and covertly snuck to the condom and personal things aisle, wishing she wasn’t such a wuss. Chloe wasn’t so coy. She’d have walked right into the sex shop and demanded pleasurable things right there and then. But then, Jenna wasn’t Chloe. Jenna wasn’t an experienced woman about town.

Jenna had only been with one man, and that had been lovely.

Jenna wasn’t altogether sure whether this was the right thing to do.

What if Nick took one look at her naked and scarpered? What if she was a disaster?

Worse, what about Evie? What if she let her daughter fall in love with a father figure who wasn’t gentle with her heart? Or who… Dear God, she was thinking about her three-year-old while looking at… strawberry flavoured lube? That was a thing? Wow, sex had really changed in the last few years.

Or maybe she’d always just been a little naive and conservative.

She liked being that way. Ollie had liked her being that way.

Now she was thinking about her dead husband and her daughter and staring at strawberry lube she was never going to use.

‘Hello. Can I help you?’

Ugh. A human. A pharmacy shop human in a white coat and a name badge that said My Name Is Anthea. Anthea was smiling at Jenna. A little too eagerly.

Jenna looked around. Where the hell had Chloe got to? One minute she’d been here, and now she’d disappeared. What the hell? Now she had to speak to this person who knew she was thinking about having sex. She brushed her hands down her dress. ‘Actually, I’m fine. Thanks. I’m just in the wrong aisle.’

The woman looked at her in a way that said, yes, honey. I really believe you accidentally found yourself staring at strawberry lube. ‘We’ve got a special offer on our adult section items at the moment. Two for one.’

‘Yep. Thanks.’ No. Thanks. Go away. Sometimes she wished she wasn’t so well brought up, so bloody polite. ‘I think I’m fine—’

‘See here…’ My Name Is Anthea reached up and lifted down something that appeared to have glide written on it. Jenna felt the burn in her cheeks. ‘It’s a bit confusing, isn’t it? So much variety. Natural feel, tingling or intense. Lucky for you, this is my merchandising area of expertise.’

People were experts in this? ‘Oh. Great.’

Please leave me alone.

My Name Is Anthea never once dropped her toothy smile as she reached up and tugged down another tube. No. Worse. Two tubes. Three. Four. She showed them to Jenna, one by one. Actually, held them out to her, offering them as if they were tubes of Smarties. ‘Do you prefer it sticky or silky? Or this? This one ensures maximum pleasure for both partners. This one’s minty fresh. Personally, I prefer—’

‘Whoa. I, er….’ What the actual…? Jenna wanted to put her fingers in her ears and sing la-la-la at the top of her voice. But, again, her polite upbringing made her stand and smile and take the hits.

A frown flickered behind Anthea’s eyes. ‘Okay, none of these? What exactly are you looking for?’

‘Hmmmmmm… er… hmmmmmm.’ A huge hole to swallow me up right now, thanks. ‘Condoms. Just condoms.’

‘What? No lube?’

‘Should I have lube?’ Jenna just about managed to spit the words through gritted teeth and a tightly closed mouth.

‘Oh, I see. You’re new to this.’ Anthea lowered her voice a little and changed it to something sickly sweet, as if she were talking to a child. ‘I hope he’s worth it, honey. Don’t give your precious gift away to anyone unworthy.’

God. Kill me know. ‘Yes. Okay. Lube. Lube it is. Just give me—thanks.’ Jenna took all the tubes out of My Name Is Anthea’s hands.

‘Condoms are along this shelf here, and the one below.’

Jenna followed Anthea’s finger as she pointed down the aisle to a bewildering array of coloured packets with swirls and glittering stars on them. And weird names. So many. Too many. Still not maintaining eye contact with Anthea, Jenna whispered, ‘Two packets.’

‘Sorry?’ My Name Is Anthea leaned closer. She was looking at Jenna with a mix of sympathy and curiosity. ‘What did you say?’

‘Two packets. Please.’

‘Ribbed? Dotted? Thin feel? Mutual climax?’

A little old lady walking past the end of the aisle stopped and looked down at Jenna’s full hands. She smiled, eyes shining, nodded and walked away.

God. Did the very helpful, employee of the year, Anthea want to use the shop tannoy? Maybe that way even more people would know Jenna Cassidy-Pearce, WIDOW and SINGLE MOTHER, was BUYING SEXY THINGS. It was absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. It was perfectly natural, and she was taking control; that was what independent, sexually responsible women did. She raised her chin. ‘I’ll have two.’

Anthea’s frown deepened. ‘Sorry, love. I don’t understand. You want two packets of each kind? That’s a lot of condoms. A lot of—well, if you’re new to this, it pays to take things slowly. You can get sore, urine infections—’

‘Thanks! Yes.’ How can I make you stop?

To stop herself jamming the lube into My Name Is Anthea’s mouth, Jenna raised her overflowing hands and pointed Glide and Slide towards a section of purple packets. ‘One each of those. Please.’

Before I die.