Cody — 11
“What are you doing?”
“Huh?” I asked as I looked at Hawke and then down to the mess I had made of the bread dough. Shit. Now it would need to rise again. That wasn’t good. Not when we were already on a time crunch. “Sorry. I guess my mind is elsewhere today.”
“You guess? Cody, you’ve been distracted all week. What gives?”
I sighed, not really in the mood to tell Hawke what was going on, but not wanting to continue on as I’d been. Adrian was distracting me more than ever, and the man hadn’t done anything to do so. Nothing. In fact, he’d pulled back on communicating with me. I only got one text a day, maybe.
Had he given up and found someone else last weekend? I’d told the man more than once things wouldn’t work out between us. Maybe he’d finally listened, and this was the way things were going to be now. Damn, if that was the case, I wasn’t sure how to take it. I’d really gotten used to chatting with him.
But when Adrian said he had plans and then later mentioned having a relaxing evening, I took that only one way. How else could you take it with the sexual undertone that was obviously there? So Adrian had…what?
“You didn’t hear me at all, did you?”
“Whaaa?” I looked over at Hawke, who simply rolled his eyes at me in a way that only he could do. Tris and I had dubbed it the what-the-fuck-am-I-going-to-do-with-you look in high school. Yeah, he had that look right this moment.
“You’re distracted. You’ve messed up several things this week, and today is worse than all week combined. What gives?”
“I’m just…I don’t know. Not really all here today?”
“That’s a given. You know what you need?”
“No, but I’m sure you’ll tell me.”
“You need to relax. And I have just the way to do it, too!”
“Dare I even ask? Our ways of relaxing are somewhat different, man.” I glanced at the bread dough, deciding that if I reformed the ball, it might be salvageable. One of the perks of dough: you could always let it rise again.
“You need a day at Paint the Town!”
“Oh man, that would be awesome. When was the last time we did that?”
“I’m not sure, but the guys aren’t on shift tomorrow, and Tris and I have already called and reserved space. Is it okay if some of the guys from the firehouse tag along?”
“Are you kidding? The more the merrier, in my opinion. And I’d love to take a shot at Trace.”
“Yeah, no shooting my boyfriend in the balls, man.”
“Why the fuck not? If I do, then you can make him feel better by giving them a massage or something.”
I laughed at Hawke’s hopeful look, but at the same time, he looked torn. Did he want Trace to actually go through pain just so he could make him feel better? It was comical to watch the emotions play out across Hawke’s face. In the end, I think Trace’s nuts were going to be safe because Hawke kept shaking his head no. Too bad. Although, with the amount of protective gear we all wore, they never were in any danger really.
“So tomorrow?” I asked, bringing Hawke’s attention back to me.
“Yes. Nine tomorrow morning.”
“Cool. I’ll have to swing by my parents’ place and pick up my gear. Did you get the balls, or should we go shopping later?”
“Tristan was making a run to the store. Do you want me to go with you to get your stuff?”
“Naw, it’s all good. They’ve actually mellowed a bit again. I think the fact that I’m okay with not seeing them on a daily basis made them think about how they’d been treating me. That and the fact that Wyatt and Conrad told them off.”
“They what? Oh my god. You didn’t tell me that. What did they say?” Hawke sat down with a big cheesy grin on his face, waiting for the latest gossip. Yep, that was Hawke all right. I hoped he never changed.
“Not much to tell, sorry. Wyatt’s a senior this upcoming year, and he’s already looked into local colleges and stuff. But he’s also looked at some out of state. Well, they didn’t like that. Wyatt told them too bad. If they didn’t start treating us better, they’d end up losing all three of their kids. Conrad agreed with him.” I covered the dough I’d been reforming and placed it on the warming tray, hoping it wasn’t a complete loss.
“Wow. Well, I have to agree with your brother though. They’ve been complete assholes to you three for years.”
“I think they just want to enjoy life before they die or something. They had Evelyn in high school, and that really changed things for them. Now that we’re all older, they’re trying to relive the youth they lost because they were busy raising kids.”
“I’m not buying it. They’re assholes in my book.”
I snorted because Hawke was right, and we both knew it. They weren’t terrible parents, but they weren’t great ones, either. We both laughed when I nodded in agreement.
“So, paintball tomorrow. We still doing the Five Guys thing after?”
“Actually, no. Walker said he was going to throw some food on the grill. He and Tris have the biggest place, so we’re all going to head over there and hang out after. Does that work?”
“That’s great, actually. I haven’t had a chance to hang out with Tris as much as I used to. You either.”
“I know, and I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t be. You have a guy who makes you incredibly happy. Enjoy that. I’m not upset at all. I mean, think about it. When I was seeing Angie, you dealt with me hanging out with her.”
“Yeah, but that was only every so often. I live with Trace, and Tris lives with Walker.”
“True, but it’s all good.”
I could tell that Hawke wanted to argue, but I wasn’t going to have it. He and Tristan were my best friends, and I wanted nothing more for them than happiness. Their guys did that, so if that meant we spent less time together, so be it. As it was, we’d already had to cut back once we graduated and Tristan joined the fire department.
“I still feel bad,” Hawke replied, bringing me out of my thoughts.
“Don’t. I mean it. It’s all good.”
“You know…if you got a boyfriend, or another girlfriend…” Hawke rolled his eyes when he said girlfriend, causing me to chuckle. Yeah, he loved women, but not to date.
“You know, you might be right. Maybe I should find someone to date. Know any single girls?” I watched as Hawke’s eyes narrowed at me, and he huffed, turned, and flounced off as only he could. Yeah, served him right. But if I was being truthful with myself, it probably wouldn’t hurt for me to start dating. But having been hurt so much in the past made me hesitant.
“Okay, I’m headed out. I have to go wax my eyebrows for tomorrow.”
I looked at my best friend and didn’t even bat an eye at his statement, but I was curious. “Dude, we’re playing paintball—why do you need to primp?”
“Because after we’re all going to be at Tristan’s. Those are the guys Trace works with. I don’t want them to see me if my brows aren’t on point!”
“Yeah, okay. You go have a beauty treatment, and I’ll see you tomorrow at Paint the Town.” Hawke waved as he left the kitchen, and I tried to not be annoyed with the others that were on the opposite side of the room, hoping they could snag one of the jobs here. They were making a huge mess, but that was the joy of working in a kitchen. I wouldn’t be cleaning the mess, they would.
“Cody, are you still not talking to me?”
“I’m talking to you, Emme, but I’m still upset. What you did—”
“Was rotten and underhanded, I know. But you have to understand where I was coming from. I only want AJ to be happy. And since he and David divorced, you were the first person he’s really shown interest in.”
“I find that hard to believe, but he’s said the same thing. I guess we’re friends? But I don’t think things will work out with the two of us. He’s a lot older than me, Emme. Even though I’m attracted to your brother, what could we really have in common?”
“Are you sure?” Emme asked as she ran a hand up and down my arm. She reminded me a lot of Evelyn, and that made me realize I needed to go see my sister and niece. I hadn’t had any time with my Heidi lately, and I was overdue.
“Yeah, I’m sure. There’s a huge age difference between us, and I’m sure that beyond going out to dinner, we wouldn’t ever have anything in common to do.”
“Awe, don’t give up. You may not know AJ very well, but I do. You should see him with Addie and Josh. He’s so much fun and has tons of energy. I get it he’s older, but maybe if you look past his age, you’ll see he really is young at heart.”
“Thanks, Emme. I’ll think about it, but don’t hold your breath. Besides, I think he’s seeing someone already.”
“Oh? Why would you say that? He hasn’t said anything, and I mean it, he’s really smitten with you.”
I didn’t get a chance to respond because Emme turned and strolled back to the other side of the kitchen when she was called from across the room. There were several people there, hoping to secure a job. I decided I wasn’t waiting for the bread dough, so I walked over to the pan in the warming tray and dumped it in the trash. Once I’d washed the pan and took out the trash, I waved to Emme and walked out. I needed to figure some things out, and a perk of being so close to the owner was that I could leave once the lunch rush ended if I needed to.
I had some thinking to do, and I knew exactly where I wanted to do it, so after a quick stop by my parents’ place to grab my paintball gear, I headed north. There was a park about halfway to Yellowstone, and it had lots of places to sit and think. Right now, that was what I needed more than anything. Once I was there, I parked and climbed out. After hiking a few hundred yards in on the path, I stopped at the picnic area and got comfortable.
I’d been hurt, a lot. By every person I’d ever dated as well as my parents. Yes, they were certainly in separate categories, but still, my parents had used me as a free babysitter, and my choice in boyfriends and girlfriend…well, it was definitely lacking. Could it be worse with Adrian? He’d been cheated on, so hopefully that meant he’d not do the same. Because honestly, that sucked.
But I couldn’t deny my attraction for him. It was there and Adrian Fisher made my mind go places it had never gone before. He was great company, he was respectful, and courteous. What the hell was wrong with me?
Until Adrian, I’d never been so uncertain of anything. But it was time to give him a chance because if nothing else, this week I’d realized something. I liked spending time with Adrian. Even as just friends, he was great company. And that was something I’d never had before in a previous relationship. I’d never had that foundation of friendship. I’d come closest with my ex-girlfriend but she’d pushed too hard, too fast, and in the end, it was better she and I didn’t work. So now, I needed to let Adrian know I wanted to give things a try. I needed to ask him out for a change.
Before I realized it, the sun had set and I’d thought about a lot of shit and realized, man, life was really fucked up for someone as young as me. Well, enough of that.
When I got back to the truck, I noticed I had several missed calls and texts from Hawke and Tristan, which was bad. Hoping I wouldn’t get my ass chewed out too much, I gave Tristan a call. Although, maybe I shouldn’t have.
“Dude, where have you been?”
“Umm, hello to you, too, sunshine. What the hell, Tris?”
“Do you realize what time it is?”
I glanced at the clock on the dash and it was then that I realized it was later than I thought. “Yeah, the clock says a little after nine. Why?”
“Why? We’ve been trying to call you but you didn’t answer. Hawke was worried, and he wanted to make sure you were still on for paintball tomorrow.”
“I was thinking. I’m in the truck and on my way home now. But yes to paintball. I’m really looking forward to taking on Trace. And maybe Walker. I mean, that’s gotta be fun, right?”
“Just don’t hurt my guy too much.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I told him as I pulled into the drive-through. It had been hours since I’d eaten lunch and I was hungry and my stomach was letting me know.
“Hey, there’s Hawke now. I’ll see you tomorrow,” Tristan said as the phone beeped on his end.
“Yep.” I ordered my food after I pulled up to the window. Once I had hot fries and a greasy cheeseburger in a paper bag beside me, I was on my way back out to the ranch. By the time I got there, I knew the day would have set in on me and I’d be tired, so I made sure I didn’t putz around through town.
When I drove over the cattle guard at Knotty Springs, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was pleasantly full, and not having gotten much sleep lately, the inky darkness caused sleepiness to set in quickly. Out here, that was never a good combination. Within minutes I pulled up in front of the cabin I called home. After parking on the side, I grabbed my stuff and got out.
I knew I stunk and needed a shower. Even with as tired as I was, I somehow managed to get inside and take care of my nighttime routine before I fell into bed. That was the last thing I remembered because I dozed off thinking about Adrian as I had every night for the past week.