Chapter Twenty-Four

Booker

Frosty wind burns my face as I stare out at the city far below. I’m glad for it. I deserve to be as uncomfortable as humanly possible. Realization dawns on me as winter air cools my fiery temper, and I understand exactly how big of a mess I’ve created for myself.

Jesus Christ, I punched Kieran in the face!

He’s forgiven me for worse, but can I forgive him for his behavior through all of this? Hitting on Sasha? Purposely taking aim at our relationship? I’m not convinced I can even call it that. As of right now, we are nothing.

But we could be something, couldn’t we?

I release a breath, and it dissolves into the city air around me. I can’t spend the rest of the day hiding up here. I need to talk to Sasha. I need to let her know how stupid I think Kieran’s idea was. And that I had nothing to do with it.

That I’m sorry.

I am sorry. For everything. Sometimes, I wish I’d never tested the app in the first place, but when I think about how good it felt, every experience I had with Angel, with Sasha, I can’t force myself to regret a single moment.

Except the one that just happened.

The sky is charcoal gray, and it matches my foul mood perfectly. I turn away from the city and open the door to step back down into the office. My footsteps echo against the white-painted brick walls on the way to my floor. When I enter, the entire office seems to turn and look in my direction.

What the fuck’s happened now?

I stare down every face I see. I don’t have time to be the center of drama or gossip. I have a fucking business to run. Before I can reach my office door, Lucy flies out of hers and nearly grasps my arms to keep me from moving. She stops herself just in time and lowers her hands to her sides.

“Mr. Knight. Could I speak with you a moment? It’s urgent.”

I glance over at Sasha’s office and realize it’s dark, the door shut. She must have decided to leave for the day. I don’t suppose I can blame her. Maybe after some time to think, she’ll come back ready to talk rationally about all of this.

Maybe I will, too.

When I look back at Lucy, her eyes are moist with unshed tears.

What?

“Lucy, what’s going on? Why are you upset?”

“It’s… Sasha,” she whispers. Her eyes dart around, and when I look up, I can see everyone still looking at us.

“I believe there is work to be done,” I say in my loudest boss voice. “Does anyone feel like getting fired today for slacking on the job?”

That does the trick. Heads dart back down, and the productive clacking of keyboards recommences, though I imagine it’s more the office chat going nuts than actual work being done.

Yet again, I’ve gone off the rails here. People used to respect me. Now they’re watching me like I’m some reality TV star and they’re just waiting to see what I’ll do next. I don’t think any of this is covered in the management books.

Wait. Lucy’s crying. And it’s about Sasha.

My stomach drops.

“In my office. Now.”

I guide her inside and close the door behind us before I turn to face her. The woman is wringing her hands. What kind of secret is she carrying?

“What’s happened, Lucy? You can tell me.”

I’m too riled up to realize I haven’t used her last name. She lifts an eyebrow at me but says nothing about it. I really don’t care. If something’s happened to Sasha…

“She quit, sir,” Lucy whispers.

“What?”

I couldn’t possibly have heard that right. Sasha wouldn’t give up this job just because of some stupid misunderstanding.

Would she?

“She quit. She told me to tell you, and that she’d follow up with written confirmation later. I tried. I tried to get her to reconsider, but she wouldn’t hear of it.”

My vision turns crimson. Sasha quit because of Kieran’s dumbass behavior, and I’m the one who let this all happen. My phone dings from my desk, and I pick it up to check the email.

It’s from Sasha. The subject line is one word: resignation.

All of this is true.

“I’ll kill him this time,” I growl.

I stride past Lucy, who steps out of my path of destruction just in time to avoid getting knocked over. I’m glad she has the good sense to do that, because I’m in no mood to apologize for yet more harm to women in this office.

Today, that will come to an end.

I stride toward Kieran’s office. I can’t bring myself to care if the cube-dwellers are watching or not. I don’t care about anything but putting that fucking asshole in his place. He owes me for this, more than anything he’s ever owed me in his life.

That’s really saying something, for Kieran.

When I reach his office, I find him at his desk, rubbing his jaw. When he sees me, he glares. “This better be an apology visit. Why doesn’t it look like an apology visit?”

“Sasha quit, thanks to you,” I spit. I step in and slam the door behind me this time. No need to give everyone more of a show than they’ve already gotten. Kieran doesn’t move as he stares at me.

“You’re going to use me as your scapegoat for all of this, aren’t you? None of this has anything to do with me, asshole. You’re the one who broke her heart, who toyed with her only to freak out and walk away. If you didn’t want the girl to quit, you shouldn’t have slept with her!”

I clench my fists by my sides. I can’t kick his ass in this office, can I? A tiny voice in the back of my head reminds me that would be unprofessional.

Fuck that voice.

“You’re the one who told me to get on the app. You’re the one who made our relationship look like some kind of ploy to get marketing fodder. None of this would have happened without your stupid meddling! I was doing fine on my own!”

“Yes, so you’ve implied,” Kieran says. His voice is quiet and filled with a threat. He leans in, his elbows on the table. I can see his bruise blossoming a sickly purple color, and I have only one regret.

I wish I’d hit him harder.

“Now here’s my little threat for you, Booker. You say you’ll buy me out of my shares, eliminate my stake in the company, but how about I beat you to it? Maybe I’ll sell them off myself, perhaps to a buyer who has no interest in doing anything with the apps but wants to liquidate the assets and dismantle the company. Would that teach you a lesson in blaming the wrong person?”

I glare down at him. He doesn’t budge, and for the first time in ages, Kieran is serious about something. He would fuck me over just to prove a point, and why wouldn’t he? He’s never wanted for anything a damn day in his life. To him, this is just another business game, Monopoly money to be won or lost before the real party begins.

I know the threat is real.

“Nice,” I say. “Real nice. Some friendship we’ve built for ourselves.”

“What friendship? All I see is some blowhard poor kid who worked up a little cash and now has a big head. Just because you’re rich doesn’t mean shit, Booker. You might want to try and remember that, before I give you a harsher lesson.”

“Fuck you,” I reply. I turn without looking back and pull his door open.

I can’t stay here. This place, this empire I’ve built? Kieran has made clear he could dismantle it all with the snap of his fingers. It all grates on my nerves. I grab my work bag out of my office without a word to anyone and then make for the elevator.

When it doesn’t arrive right away, my insides prepare to explode from impatience, so I plunge into the stairwell and propel myself downstairs. My legs burn with every step after a few floors, and it feels good to move, to get this toxic energy out of my system.

By the time I reach the lobby, I’m sweating.

I need to find her. I need to make this right. Then maybe I can puzzle out whatever my relationship with Kieran has become and take appropriate action steps from there.

Sasha has to come first.

I pull out my phone and open her email.

So cold. So impersonal. I must have really pissed her off. I click the reply button and start to craft my response. My thumbs hover over the keyboard as I consider what the hell I’m going to say.

“Sasha. Please don’t do this. I care about you. I was an idiot.”

I type the words out and delete them just as fast. What the fuck am I supposed to say to justify my actions? My heart pulses with shame as I think about how I treated her, like some office fling. What on Earth was I thinking, having a quickie in my office like that? Not only did I put her reputation on the line, but our actions could have hurt the company.

Beyond that, I would never put Sasha’s body over her mind when it comes to work. The things I said… none of that even comes close to how I really feel about her.

I wonder if I can speak with her as Master. She might be more willing to talk to me through the app. It’s proven to be a safe space for us so many times before. I click out of my email and tap into the app, only to see a message waiting for me there.

“Angel has deleted her account. Messages from this conversation will be deleted in a few days.”

I have royally fucked up.

I wrack my brain for an answer. I can’t just send her an email. That’s not how we’re going to talk this out. I realize then that it’s too soon for her information to have been removed from our system. I tap in Lucy’s number and hit the call button.

“Mr. Knight. Is everything OK?”

Lucy’s voice trembles as she asks the question. I’m going to have to do so much clean up here. Now I remember why I’ve been so steadfast in keeping emotions out of my business. They might just lead to my downfall.

But if my downfall leads to Sasha…

“No, it’s not OK, but it will be. I need you to get me Sasha’s phone number and address from our company records, please.”

“You don’t have her phone number?” Lucy asks, incredulous.

Oh, good. I can feel like an even bigger asshole.

“No. But I will once you give it to me,” I say between clenched teeth.

“One second. I can pull it up right here.”

I wait while the sound of Lucy typing echoes into my ear. After forever, she speaks.

“OK, I’ve got her information. Are you ready?”

I hold my phone away from my face and type out everything Lucy tells me. I now have a means to get to Sasha that isn’t just an email.

This is better. I think I might have a real shot at redeeming myself.

Probably.

“Thank you… Miss Shone,” I say. It feels strange after I used her first name, but old habits die hard.

“You’re welcome. And Mr. Knight?”

“Yeah?”

“Make this up to her.”

I frown, but I nod. “I will. Thanks. Goodbye.”

It’s time to go get my girl.