Drake

Lucky, the doctor says. I don’t feel especially lucky. My best friend shot me, my girlfriend hasn’t visited since it happened three days ago, and I’m going blind.

I’ll admit, the bullet entering my right side and only causing minimal damage to my intestines without hitting any other major organs is pretty amazing. Other than that, shit sucks right now.

I’ve called Tiana repeatedly and texted her several times a day, but still no response. I know she was devastated to find out I was married and that I have a daughter, but I’d like the chance to explain.

“Major Valentine, how are you feeling today?” Dr. O’Leary, my surgeon asks strolling into my room holding a clipboard in his hands.

“Fine, I’d like to go home.”

“I think we can arrange that. I think it’s safe to say you’re not going to spring a leak somewhere other than your intestines and you seem to be recovering well. How’s your vision?”

The Marine Corps knows about my sight. After a thorough exam on admission, the doc knew something was wrong, I had to admit it. It’s a secret I’ve kept for seventeen years, unburdening myself was a relief but the repercussions are going to start setting in soon. People will talk, I won’t be promoted and I’ll have to quit working altogether.

“The same,” I answer.

“Good. Well, if there’s nothing keeping you here, I’ll give your nurse discharge orders and you can be on your way.”

He’s right. Nothing is keeping me here anymore. My anchor is gone. The Marine Corps has been my home and my family for so long I have no idea how I’m going to function in the civilian world.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Major, how are you coping? Do you have a therapist to talk to about your sight?”

“No, I’m fine. I’ve had seventeen years to prepare for this. Things are all lined up.” What a joke. Yeah, my house is blind-man proof and I have a service dog coming, but my real coping mechanism walked out of my life three days ago. The stunning woman with two different colored eyes, who sings like a bird is gone.

“If you need anything, look me up. You’ll know where to find me,” he says.

“I will. Thanks again, doc.”

He smiles the smile I fucking hate. The one I’ve been dreading for years. It’s the smile that says, man this guy was dealt a shitty hand in life, I’m glad it’s not me.

Thirty minutes later a nurse has removed my IV and given me strict instructions to go home to rest, and take it easy. None of which do I plan on doing. I need to find Tiana and explain why I didn’t tell her about Mona and Amari. I want her to know why I left them and I pray she will understand.

Walking out of the hospital is a bitch. I want to have a clear head when I talk to Tiana, so I refused the nurse’s offer for one last dose of pain medication. Max is waiting on the curb outside the front entrance, but I hear my name being called from behind me.

“Major Valentine, sir.”

“Captain Garcia.”

“I didn’t know you were being discharged today.”

“Neither did I, glad to be out of here, though. How are you and your fiance´ settling in?”

“Great, thank you for asking. She’s due any day now, we’re getting excited.”

“That was some move, West Coast to the East Coast, especially when she’s so far along.”

“Yep, military life…” he shrugs.

I do something I never do and reach out to pat him on the shoulder, “You’re a lucky man, Captain Garcia, don’t ever forget that.”

He nods his head, but his eyes express how much he understands. We met in California at Camp Pendleton a few weeks ago. When he told me he was being transferred, we got to know each other a little and come to find out, he’s Max’s grandson. Small world.

I’m sure Max filled him in on what happened with Jayden. Garcia appreciates his life, he’s a happy man and it shows.

“I better not keep you, Grandpa is waiting.” He nods toward the doors where Max is tapping his thumb on the steering wheel.”

“Yeah, don’t want to piss him off. Take care, I’ll probably see you soon.” See you soon gets stuck in my throat but he doesn’t notice.

In the car, Max pulls away from the curb into the parking lot without a word. On the road, he sneaks a glance at me and taps the windshield wiper button when a few drops of rain hit the windshield. Looking out the front window through a gray dot in the center of my vision is unnerving. I prefer the back, but Max says it makes him feel like a chauffeur. Which he kind of is, but he’s also a proud retired Marine who hates the fact that he’s getting older.

“Drake, I need to talk to you about Tiana.”

“Have you heard from her? I’ve been calling…”

“She won’t answer. There have been some serious developments since you were hospitalized. I didn’t want to mention them until you were doing better.”

He sounds ominous. I have that shitty feeling you get when someone says we need to talk.

“What’s going on? Did she go back to New York?” I hate asking but I need to know because if she has I’ll be taking a trip.

“No, she’s still in Jewel Falls but she’s in bad shape.”

“Jayden?”

“More than you can imagine. She’s been holed up in that house for three days and won’t answer the door. The lights go on and off and I’ve checked on her through the windows, she’s okay but she won’t speak to anyone.”

“Did they admit him into a mental hospital? Is she upset about his breakdown?”

“No, he’s in jail under suicide watch. She sent him a message that she never wanted to see him or hear from him again and he threatened to kill himself.”

Not surprising after all that happened, but why is she secluding herself?

“I feel like you’re trying to tell me something bigger, Max. What is it, just spit it out.”

“I think you need to try and talk to her. She won’t open up for anybody, not Donna or her roommate from New York, no one.”

“Her roommate is here?”

“Yes, I contacted her and sent her a ticket. I couldn’t think of anyone else, she doesn’t have any family left now.”

“So, there is more but you don’t want to tell me?”

“Yes, unfortunately, there’s a lot more, but it’s for her to tell, not me.”

“How do you know?”

“The police contacted me when they couldn’t get her to return their calls. Jayden wouldn’t stop demanding to see her. She sent her roommate a text asking her to tell the police she was done with her brother.”

“Take me to her.”

“Yes, sir.”

Everything looks so normal when we pull into Jayden and Tiana’s driveway. Jayden’s lawnmower is sitting on the side of the house where he left it a week ago, his truck is in the driveway and the swing on his porch sways in the breeze.

It smells like rain and earth and flowers. The muggy air hangs heavily around me when I exit the SUV.

“You don’t have to wait. I have a key to both houses, I’ll be fine.”

“Call if you need to go anywhere, I’m five minutes away.”

“Thank you, Max, for everything.” Max was responsible for calling SWAT and making sure Mona and Amari were safe. He has a lot of connections for a man in his seventies and when he calls, people listen. He was one of the first Marines I met when I joined the Corps. I may not have made it if it weren’t for his gruff encouragement.

“You’re welcome. Good luck.” He nods toward the house and I close the door and watch him pull away.

I let myself into the house with the key my best friend gave me years ago. My declining vision paired with the curtains having been drawn in the living room and no light makes it impossible for me to see.

I know there’s a lamp on a table about five steps in but I stop when my foot crunches in what sounds like glass. My side is burning and I’m a little light-headed, I need to sit down. I use my phone's flashlight to light the way to the couch but I can’t move. Broken glass covers the floor, every decorative thing, every photograph or knickknack has been smashed. Small pieces of furniture have been thrown against the wall and cushions and throw pillows have been sliced with a knife and emptied of their stuffing. It looks like the FBI went through the house looking for something.

I use my flashlight to guide me to the stairs picking and weaving through the debris the best I can. When I have hold of the railing, I climb the stairs with caution. I don’t know what’s been going on here, but startling Tiana seems like a bad idea right now.

Upstairs I find the door to her room open and shine the light inside.

“Tiana? Are you in here? It’s Drake, I had a key so I let myself in.”

Nothing. I scan the room and find it in considerably better shape than the downstairs but no Tiana.

With my hand on the wall to guide me, I move down the hall to Jayden’s door. His room is destroyed beyond recognition. I step inside and call Tiana’s name before switching on the overhead light. I’m surprised the light bulb is still in one piece. It’s got to be the only thing in the room that is. This isn’t the mess of investigators. This is the mess of someone in a rage.

I crunch my way across the bedroom and lying on the floor on a bed of cut up family photographs, is my Tiana. A pair of scissors is lying on the floor a few inches from her open hand and Jayden’s clothes are shredded everywhere.

I squat down a few feet away and see that her eyes are open but she isn’t moving. My stitches strain and burn, but I ignore the pain and concentrate on this fragile version of the woman I love. “Tiana, honey, it’s Drake.” No response, not even a blink. I rise enough to move closer and kneel next to her legs. She’s only dressed in a tank top and panties and she has blood streaks on her face and arms.

“Are you hurt? Baby, you have blood on your hands. Can I look at them?”

Nothing. I reach out and touch her hand. She’s freezing; she’s been lying her for a long time. Lifting her arm, I do my best to look for injuries with my peripheral vision and find small minor cuts probably from smashing everything in the house. Her other arm is the same and the blood on her face looks like she wiped her hand across her cheek.

I shouldn’t in my condition but I slide one arm under her legs and the other around her shoulders and lift her into my arms. I feel a stitch, maybe two, pop and I wince. I can feel the warmth of my blood seeping from my incision, but I need to get her out of this room.

I carry her to her bedroom and lay her on her bed. She’s limp and lifeless and if her eyes weren’t open I’d be checking for a pulse. I feel around and find a lamp that’s been turned on its side on the table next to the bed. I right it, adjust the shade and turn it on.

I press my hand to the wet spot on my shirt and since she’s practically comatose I step into her bathroom and grab a washcloth to hold pressure on my wound.

When I return, I climb in behind her and pull the covers up over us to warm her up. The air conditioning must be set at forty degrees in here and she’s ice cold.

After an hour or so, I feel her relaxing and try to talk to her again.

“Tiana, baby, can you tell me what happened here? Did you do all of this?”

“Yes.” Her voice is hoarse and quiet but at least she’s talking.

“How long were you lying on the floor?”

“Since they told me it was him.”

“Who baby? Do you mean Jayden?”

“The man on the phone.”

“A man called you? What was his name?”

“Police.”

“They called to tell you Jayden’s in jail? Is that why you’re so upset?”

“No. I hope he rots there forever.”

“I’m sorry you’re going through all of this. Is Jayden the reason you destroyed the house? You did a pretty thorough job I must say.”

“I wanted to burn it down but I’m afraid of fire.” The sound of her hollow voice squeezes my heart when I think of her losing her parents in a house fire. She’s endured so much in her short life, she deserves happiness, she deserves more than me.

We lie silent for a while and I think she’s gone to sleep when her quiet voice breaks the quiet. “I love you.”

I fight back the urge to yell thank God but she yanks me back to reality with her next question.

“Why did you abandon them? How could you leave your wife pregnant with your child in a war-torn country and never look back?”

“I looked back all the time. I’ve regretted not being a part of Amari’s life every day for the past six years, but I thought she was better off without a blind father who didn’t love her mother. Mona and I were married before she knew about my sight. When she found out I wasn’t the golden ticket to America that she thought I was, she lost interest. We never loved each other, we married because of the pregnancy and that’s all.”

“You didn’t even stick around to see her be born.”

“I knew I would love her the moment I saw her and Mona didn’t want me there. She was very clear that she only wanted financial support when it came to Amari.”

“Have you ever seen her before this week?”

“Not in person. I send money and Mona sends photographs every week. I have a photo album at home.”

“Mona didn’t want you to stay?”

“No. She wanted to come to the US, but traveling when she was so late in her pregnancy, wasn’t an option. She found someone else to use, they’re divorced now as well.”

She’s quiet for a moment.

“Thank you for telling me everything.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I wasn’t proud of my decision to let Mona raise our child alone, but she insisted. I took the easy way out for once in my life and I’m still ashamed of that.”

“You did what you thought was best at the time.”

“I did.”

Knowing the truth, Tiana presses further into the curve of my body and covers my arms with hers pulling them tighter around her.

“We good?”

“Yes, we’re good.”

“Do you want to talk about what happened here?”

“No, but you need to know.” She’s trembling in my arms. I rub her arms up and down trying to warm her but I don’t think it’s the cold that’s causing her to shake.

“Jayden didn’t go crazy, he is crazy. I feel like the Jayden I knew and loved was never real. He was so different when I came home.”

“He did change a lot after you arrived. I don’t remember him being so overprotective when you were in college but then again, I didn’t know him as well then and I didn’t know you at all.”

“No, Drake, this happened long before I came home from New York. I can’t believe I never saw it. I always thought he was protective of me because our parents died…” She begins to cry. I turn her to face me and she buries her face in my chest and sobs wrack her body.

I have no idea what she’s talking about, but if she’s forgiven me for keeping Mona and Amari a secret, I’ll comfort her for as long as she needs me to. I stroke her hair and softly whisper comforting words in her ear when she cries harder.

When she quiets down, she pulls away, sliding her hands on either side of my face to turn it to the side so I can see her better.

“He’s in love with me, Drake. My own blood brother is a pervert who’s in love with me. He wasn’t trying to be protective out of brotherly concern. He wanted to fuck me and marry me and have kids with me. He’s sick, he makes me sick, he makes me want to ruin anything he ever touched. I hate this house, I hate his fucking truck in the driveway and his damn mower and the flowers…”

She’s crying again and I’m still back at Jayden wants to fuck her. How the hell does she know something like that? She must have misinterpreted a note or a letter or something. This can’t be true. He’s Jayden, a Marine Captain, my best friend and neighbor, Tiana’s big brother. He’s just a normal guy.

“How did you find out about this?”

“He…” she gulps in a breath between sobs, “He told the police that he loved me and needed to see me. They told him I said no and he freaked out and started talking about a room in the basement that was proof of how much he loved me.

I reach over to the night table and grab a wad of tissues. She takes it and blows her nose.

“What room?”

“It’s sick, Drake, he’s so sick. I don’t want to go down there again. I left the door open, you can look at it if you want to.”

“I’m not leaving you. Does the room prove what the police are saying?”

“Oh God, yes, it’s horrible. There are pictures of me everywhere. Some when I’m sleeping, some when I’m working in the yard, running, cooking, showering, and not just recently. There are videos and photographs down there from when we lived in England. He’s been like this forever.”

My mind is racing. He’s been watching her, always. He’s probably the one who was sending her the videos. He wanted to scare her into coming home and keep her from becoming famous so he could have her all to himself. And when I started getting close, he sent some more to keep her scared, hoping she would seclude herself and hide. It all makes perfect sense now.

“Did you find any of the footage from that night you went out in New York?”

“What? No, oh my God.” She closes her eyes absorbing what I’m suggesting.

“It was him, wasn’t it? He sent the videos. Do you think he had someone drug me? Maybe there are more videos of the rest of that night, we can see if…”

“Do you want to see that? I mean if it happened.” I’m a firm believer that some things are better left unknown, but if she can’t go on without the truth I’ll understand.

“I don’t know, part of me wants to know, but I’m trying to deal with so much right now. I don’t think there’s room in my grief room for that.”

“Grief room?”

“Yeah, I had this therapist once who told me to put all my sorrows in a room in my head and deal with them one at a time.”

“Let me help you deal with some of them. I’m here for you, I’m not going anywhere, ever.”

She blinks her puffy, sad eyes while she considers my offer.

“There’s more, more to tell.”

“I’m listening.”

“Jayden was responsible for setting the fire that killed our parents. He wrote about it in a journal I found in his horrible room. He wanted me so badly, he killed our parents to have me. And then when we moved here to live with Aunt Marla, he killed her too. He put something in her drink that caused her heart attack. It was him, he did everything, he killed them all.”

“He admitted to this in a journal?”

“Yes, and to the police.”

My God, what has he done? Who is he? I’ve been living next-door to a psychopath. I’ve been working and drinking and watching football on the weekends with a deranged man. I feel duped and deceived, but only a fraction of the amount that Tiana must be feeling.

Her entire life is not what she thought it was. No wonder she tried to flip this house upside down. He took out anyone who ever loved her, anyone he saw as a threat to him.

“I can’t believe I never saw… I don’t even know what signs a person like that would exhibit.”

“Me either and I’m his sister. His flesh and blood.”

“What’s going to happen to him now?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think the UK extradites criminals and I don’t know how he will be charged with crimes he committed so long ago in another country.”

“But he admitted to it, right?”

“Yes, but I’m sure someone will claim that he’s unstable. So fucking unstable…”

“Baby, I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t help at all to say it, but I am and I’ll be here any way you want me to be, forever.”

“Forever?” she asked.

“Forever,” I promise.

“You’re all I have left.”

“I’m all you need.”

“You’re incorrigible,” Tiana states.

“Your point?”

“I love incorrigible,” she smiles.

“And I love you,” I tell her, tenderly.