Knock, knock.

As Iris stood outside Ewan’s office, beating her hand against his large, hard door, her heart beat faster than it had ever gone before. She had planned exactly what she wanted to say when she found herself face-to-face with him, but since there was no telling which way this would go she still felt like she was on a terrifying roller-coaster of emotions. This was one meeting that she could not prepare for.

He will be reasonable, Iris tried her best to convince herself. Alice said that he is kind, Amy has reassured me, even Victoria told Daisy that Lord Oakley was nice.

“Come in,” Ewan called, after only a beat. His voice sounded cool and calm now, but Iris knew it would not always be that way. She had not sent word that she was coming, but Mr. Shipman had informed her that Lord Oakley had some free time now, so it seemed best to just go for it. Only now when it was too late did Iris doubt her crazy plan.

There was no turning back now!

Iris pushed the door open, cringing as it creaked loudly, and she peered inside to see Ewan sitting behind a desk. His head was bent, but his eyes flicked up to meet hers as soon as she started speaking. She felt that bolt of electricity once more, but she tried to push it to one side for now.

“I am sorry to trouble you, Lord Oakley, may I request a moment of your time?” Her father had never been included to let any of the serving staff into his office, but Iris did not think that Ewan would be that way. “If it is not a good time, I can come back?”

Ewan narrowed his eyes at her. He gave Iris a distant look as if she was just another stranger. Her heart dipped low as she got this look, it didn’t seem fair when all she could really think about was their night together, but what could she do about it? She wasn’t really here for that right now anyway. She had something much more important to deal with.

“You may come in now,” he finally declared with a deep sigh, as if he did not really want to deal with Iris at this moment. “Please, take a seat.”

Iris took a quick glance around the room as she moved through it. The white walls were clean and tall, and there were two long thin windows allowing the natural light to fill the room. He had a lamp on his desk, but most of his work was done by the daylight. In between two of those windows hung a small clock that ticked very noisily. Iris wondered if this gave Ewan a terrible headache as he worked.

Ewan’s desk was much longer than her father’s, and it had chairs all along it which felt much more inviting. There was also a very large bookshelf behind Ewan, and Iris really wanted to examine them all in turn, but there just wasn’t time. She had a job to do.

“Th... thank you for seeing me,” Iris stuttered as she moved to take a seat. Everything that she’d planned saying flew right out of her head. “I am sorry to trouble you; I know that you are a very busy man.”

“What is this regarding?” His tone was wary, which made Iris clam up instantly.

“Oh well, I was not sure whether or not you wanted to talk about the last time we met...”

"The first time I saw you, we were inside of my home," Ewan shut Iris down with a few hard words. “That is all there is to say about the matter.”

“Oh right, okay.” Iris felt very put out by that, but if it was what he wanted then she would ignore their past too. It hurt her deeply, she didn’t like the way it made her feel inside, but she would not let him see that. “Well, actually there is another matter that we need to discuss.”

“And what is that?” Ewan shuffled his papers, making it clear that he had a lot to do.

“My...” Iris gulped, hating the fact that she had to lie to the one person who made her feel alive. Somehow, spinning this line to Ewan felt more challenging than when she had done it to anyone else. “My father is sick.” Her eyes flickered towards the ground, she could not stand to look at him. “My sister fears that he might die. I know it is a lot to ask, but I would like some time to go and visit him, if I may?”

“Oh.” Ewan sounded shocked, this was not what he had been expecting at all. It made him feel bad for trying to ignore the connection that he had with the lovely woman, but having her in his home made it that much more challenging. “I see. Have you consulted Lady Oakley about this?”

“She has suggested that she will be fine without me for a short while.” Iris still could not drag her eyes upright. Her entire body trembled with fear. “I know I am asking too much. I feel terrible about the timing but I really feel like I must get to visit him as soon as possible.”

“And where does your father live?”

“In the city.” Iris secretly crossed her fingers for luck underneath her chair. “I will organize a carriage to take me there.”

“No, you will not,” Ewan shook his head as he talked. “I cannot have that.”

“I know this is awkward, but I would like to spend some time with my father before he passes.”

Iris felt indignant as she talked. This did not feel like the sort of subject that she should have to defend herself on. It might have been a lie, but as far as Ewan knew her father was dying and he would not let her go. She felt like she was being punished for dancing with him at the ball, but he was as much of a part as that as her.

“Oh no, I understand that. I know that you need to be with your father.” Ewan shot Iris a small smile, but it was the friendliest that he has been with her since she had been under his roof. “What I mean is I do not want you organizing your own transport. I will sort a carriage for you. In fact, I am returning to the city myself next week to complete my business. I will escort you.”

“You do not need to do that.” Immediately Iris panicked. How was she supposed to complete her secret mission with Ewan by her side? "I will be fine alone, I travelled down by myself."

“I know that, but you are under my care now. I would like to ensure that you are safe on your journey. It makes sense if I am travelling in that direction too. I will take my own carriage of course, but I will be on the same journey as you.”

Ewan had no idea why he was being so insistent with this beautiful young woman sitting before him, he did not usually care so much about his staff, but there was something about her that brought out his fiercely protective side. He was supposed to be keeping far away from Daisy, she was too much of a temptation for him, but the thought of her going all that way by herself was unbearable.

It was just lucky that he could control himself. He had let himself slip at the ball in the Warwick home, but he would never allow that to happen again. However beautiful this lady was.

“Oh right.” Iris was not sure if she could disagree with such a reasonable request. Especially from her boss. She wanted to, but she could not think of a reason on the spot. This was an unexpected turn of events. “Erm, yes, that will be fine.” Maybe she should just agree now, then she could think of an excuse later. “But it is imperative that I leave very soon.”

“It is for me too. My business is very time sensitive.” Ewan wasn’t unkind as he stated this, but his tone was incredibly firm. “I will contact you again as soon as the arrangements are done.”

For a few moments, they simply sat there staring at one another as if they were both waiting for the other person to back down. Iris kept parting her lips as her voice box was desperate to speak. She wanted to know exactly how things would be between them considering what had happened before, but since they were clearly not discussing it she could not ask.

Iris hated how handsome Ewan was, because it made it so much harder for her to keep herself together. His deep eyes reminded her of all the hope she felt on that night. The fact that she knew how wonderful it felt to have those arms wrapped around her reminded her of how deeply she felt. Even the way that he whispered ‘I love you’ in her dream made her recognize that actually it was love that she felt for this man too.

She did not think that love would happen for her now, she assumed that it was far too late, but now it had in the cruellest way possible. Maybe as a punishment for tricking Duke Pembroke, fate had caused Iris to love a man that could never feel the same way about her.

"Is there anything else?" Ewan asked while folding his arms across his chest. He needed to create a barrier between himself and Daisy before he acted out of character again. “Or is that our business concluded for now?”

“Yes, I suppose it is.” Iris scraped back her chair to leave. “Thank you very much for seeing me, Lord Ewan, and thank you for your kindness too. I appreciate everything that you have done for me today.”

Then she bobbed into a curtsy once more. It still felt strange to act so formally around a man that she had shared a close, intimate moment with, but he had let her see that he only wanted to behave as strangers, so the formality was essential.

“Yes... right.”

Iris turned to walk from the room with a mix of emotions churning her up inside. On the one hand she was grateful that she could get to see Elizabeth, even if it would be a little challenging, but on the other Ewan was acting very strange around her. And now she would have to be escorted by him on her journey.

“Daisy, wait.”

Iris twisted her body around, she could not stop hope from filling her chest. She wasn’t quite sure what she wanted Ewan to say to her, but it went something along the lines of ‘I love you desperately, please be mine’. Even if that was a crazy fantasy... nothing more than another daydream that could never come true.

“Yes, my Lord?”

Iris forced her lips to curve in an upwards direction, but she kept her mouth closed to control the sound of her racing heart. She even had to clap her hands behind her back to stop herself from reaching out to him.

“I...” Ewan opened his mouth to speak, but he seemed to think better of it at the last moment and he clamped his lips shut again.

“Yes, my Lord?” Iris wanted to encourage him to speak, she needed to hear what he had to say. “Is there anything else that you need from me?”

Ewan’s mind raced as he tried to fill in the blank of what he could no longer say. In all honesty, he was not sure what he planned to say when Daisy turned back to face him, all he knew was that he wasn’t quite ready for her to leave.

“I just wanted to thank you for doing such a good job with my sister,” he finally said lamely. “She seems to be doing very well now, with you working for her. It is nice to see Amy blossoming.”

“Oh.” Iris knew this was not what Ewan originally intended to say, but it felt good to have her hard work recognized. “Thank you very much. Your sister is a lovely young lady, and I feel honoured to be working with her. She is sweet, with a lot to offer.”

“Yes.” Ewan felt pleased to have someone else recognize what his sister was worth. He loved Amy very much, he knew how wonderful she was since he had helped raise her, but somehow hearing another person say it made it all the more powerful. “I think so too.”

Iris and Ewan shared a smile, but then it was really time for her to leave. Neither of them could think of an excuse for her to remain, so Iris turned and she walked from the room with a clip, clip, clip as her shoes connected loudly with the ground.

As she left Ewan alone, he dropped the papers in his hand onto his desk with a deep sigh. Ever since he had first laid eyes on Daisy at the Warwick household, she had set something alight within him. It was almost as if he had been coasting through life for years like he’d been on autopilot without even realising it. Daisy woke him up, she sparked sensations within him that he did not even know he could feel, she awoke desires within him that he did not know he had.

When he held Daisy in his arms and he danced freely with her in that hallway, Ewan experienced what it would be like to find love in his life... and it was something that he surprisingly liked.

The moment that his father passed away, Ewan took on the family responsibilities. He took over the running of the household and the business, as well as looking after his sister. Ewan did not mind the hard work, in fact, it suited him well, but it put his social life on the backburner.

He did not care one iota about that until he laid eyes on Daisy. How typical for him to feel that way for a woman that was not really suitable, given his social standing.

Ewan stood and he wandered over to the window in his office, where he stared out over his land for a few moments. During the short periods that he spent at home, he never got a chance to just take stock for a moment, but something about that conversation with Daisy forced him to do it.

Now he had offered to take his sister’s handmaiden on a journey to the city. It was under terrible circumstances, but still, they would be alone for an extended period of time. Again, not really. Daisy would be in her carriage and he would be in his.

Still, it felt far too intimate.

What am I thinking? He banged his fists lightly against the window as he realized what a pickle he had gotten himself into. He could not go back on his word now, he had to escort Daisy to the city. He just hoped that they could both come out of it with their reputations intact.

Iris did not think as she walked away. In fact, she was in such a hurry to leave that she almost ran. She needed to push everything that had happened in Ewan’s office to one side for now. She would think about it all when she got into bed tonight, she could analyze it to death then, but for now, she had to keep her head screwed on.

She wanted a job to come back to. She needed to make sure that she did everything right before she went so that she was irreplaceable.